| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:04:41 PM | | Very touchy subject here, but anyone else ever been in this horrible situation. My wife of 5 years just recently told me that she has been having an affair. She had 2 sons from a prior realtionship when we met, and we have a daughter together. Now she is pregnant and paternity test came back saying that the baby is not mine. She is a gorgeous woman who I love, but I am completly distraught. She has told me that she is willing to end the affair, but is too late to even think about an abortion. To add to the problem, even if I was willing to raise this child, the father is black (i am not racist), just can't imagine the humilation of all our freinds and family knowing was happened. I love her, but can't trust her at all, (think she's still having sex with him). WHAT SHOULD I DO???? Help! | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:14:32 PM | most/some of the ladies here/and not here would've kicked the guy in the pants thru a closed door for just cheating
the child may not come with any afro/american features (NOT INTENED TO INSULT ANY ONE/RACE)
one only does what one wants to
you now have to choose carefully
BEST OF LUCK
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:17:35 PM | | If that was me, she would raise that child herself and I would be talking to her only through a lawyer. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:21:14 PM | I didn,t think they could do dna testing until the baby was actually born???
yeah, me too. I'm gonna look that one up...
--->insert google search here<---
Okay, apparently it CAN be done - the process/procedure is called AMNIOCENTESIS. WOW, you really DO learn something new everyday. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:27:19 PM | | take your kid and leave, let the homewrecker piece of crap pay child support for his kid or end up in jail. cheat once she will cheat again dont you see the pattern | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:27:32 PM | You actually can do it via amniocentesis or chorionic villus sampling.
Edit: However, there is a risk of miscarriage. I wouldn't think they would do either test SOLELY for paternity testing. But I'm not a physician... | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:34:05 PM | | Get out while you only have to pay child support for your daughter. Once a cheater always a cheater. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:37:22 PM | I think you,ve already made your mind up subconciously about what you,re going to do.
'even if I was willing to raise this child' and 'just can't imagine the humilation of all our freinds and family knowing was happened'
It,s your decision and yours alone to make, we don,t know your whole personal situation so cannot tell you which way to go, even if some of us are giving advice it,s not our lives we,re talking about and besides there are other children involved, you have to think of them too. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:48:53 PM | One and done. Can't EVER trust a cheater!
I love the way she says that she is "willing" to end the affair. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 5:50:41 PM | | Even if she did end the affair the childs father would still be a part of their lives forever so.....not just the baby but the father to deal with too! | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 6:01:16 PM | ok 1st of all...^^^^^^OMG to the poster above..
ok now that thats over,,bad enough that she cheated,,now it gets better that shes gonna have someone elses baby...the best part is that YOU get to pay for it if you dont show her the curb right now | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 6:06:50 PM | Yeah she cheated, but contrary to poular belief once a cheat is not always a cheat, we don,t know the whole situation here, he may be a complete ass and not have been treating her right, I,m not saying going off and having an affair is the right way to go about things but...well like I said we don,t know the ins and outs.
As for him paying for it/the child he wouldn,t have to the father would have to pay
and thankyou wizard x | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 6:07:30 PM | | Buddy, I feel for you. Is adoption an option? Personally if you think that she is still cheating then I would talk to a lawyer and figure out a way to cut your losses and leave. File for custody of your kid, you should win that and try to give your daughter the best life that you can. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 6:30:53 PM | I feel for you man, this is a very touchy issue. Your wife may really regret what she has done but realize that things will probably change. She may want that guy she cheated on you with in her life just for the kids sake, and you’ll probably have to end up seeing this guy every other week or something. Or if she chooses not to have the father in the kids life, then it’s most likely that you’ll be supporting the kid which sucks too. Other than that the kid will always be a reminder to you of what she has done. I’m sure you can eventually learn to love the kid, but until then it’s mental torture. She already has 2 kids that weren’t yours, and that a big move for a guy to take on that responsibility, the fact that a 4th one is on it’s way and it’s not yours also is gonna be hard to deal with. Also as you said the humiliation of all your friends and family knowing what has happened is going to be tough. The fact is they are all going to find out eventually exactly what happened, but what’s probably going to be more humiliating is if they find out your still want to stay with her! Have a heart to heart talk with her and find out where she stands. But at this point in the game you have to think about yourself and what you feel is the best move for you. I realized I only focused on the negative aspects of the issue. If you stick around it could easily change for the better. if she is really remorseful about the whole situation she may actually feel indebt to you for staying with her and forever shower you with love. Only time will tell. But to be honest you should do what you heart tells you to do. if you feel like leaving her isn’t going make you happy then stay, and F*** everyone elses opinion. If you feel like staying is going to make you miserable then bounce, the sooner the better.
Don’t take my comment as advice, this is just my opinon. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 6:34:03 PM | Oh man!! What a predictament. You should worry about your daughter and how shes gonna be brought up. I knew of another person that always cheated on her hubby all the time, eventually leaving him with HER own kids (those kids were not his) and running off to be with this other guy, and raising HIS 4 kids. Her youngest daughter now is a rebel without a cause type person, always in trouble with the law, doesnt care about anything, as she figures nobody cares about her.
Get out of that relationship, take your daughter and look for someone thats gonna be honest with YOU and with your daughter. Instead of spending your life walking in a minefield sorta speak...Let this dude that she is cheating on you with, pay for her needs and the babies. I know ya love her, but obviously she doesnt feel the same about you, or even respects your love. Good luck with whatever you do.... | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:23:18 PM | | Hate to tell you all this but in the good ol USA if they are married the court will assume the baby is her husbands and HE will get to pay child support......DID NOT say it was fair but hey they are married the law assumes that any children are his.......I know of several gentlemen paying support for children that are not theirs. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:29:47 PM | I know I'm gonna catch lots of he|| for this BUT ----
D U M P T H E S L U T ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
I never had proof, but was told that my 1st wife cheated on me & was preg with someone else's kid. She had a miscarriage, so we never knew for sure. I however DO know she cheated on me, and have suspected at times that our child may not be mine, but never had the guts to have DNA testing done.
My current wife left me & got preg to someone else, while still married to me. At least she's a soon-to-be-ex, instead of still living with me.
But, I stand beside what I said --- dump her, unless you want the jealousy and hatred and suspicions there all the time. As others have said, he (the other guy) will (or SHOULD) be around all the time, and if she slept with him & got preg, what's to say she won't do it again, with him or someone else. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:36:41 PM | | I say this is a BS post. You say you love your wife but your profile says "Honest loving man looking for same in a lady." Are you cheating on her too? | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:39:36 PM | Oh My God...how could she do that?If it were me I'd leave her then and there with no questions asked. Thats neither fair to you nor to your daughter.I hope things work out for you.I'm really sorry.No one should have to go through all that. | |
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| Wife pregnant from another man
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:41:05 PM | Hmmmm New profile.. U love sex... and ur looking for a woman to hang out with....
You need to deal with the drama in your relationship before you drag anyone else into your world!
Maybe you guys could go to marraige counceling to see if you would be able to work things out.
yes this child could very possibly be a reminder for the rest of it's life that she had an affair... but you need to deal with the whole trust issue and find out if there is a relationship to even save! | |
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