| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 9:40:03 AM | | I'm 50 years old and loving it except for the fact that it seems men around my age (give or take 5 years) lose interest real fast when they find out I have a daughter 12 years old. I know most people at this age have only grown children but that doesn't mean revisiting child-rearing is a terrible thing. I love all my kids and have enjoyed all of them but I do have to admit that I've been able to enjoy the youngest one more because I'm more relaxed and laid back. And we have FUN and laugh a lot nd she's a joy. I call her my blessing child because she is. She's keeping me young at heart and I have discovered life is an adventure. So, guys, why the problem with mid-age single moms? | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 9:49:41 AM | When I started dating again at 47 I knew that a lot of the women I was going to meet would have kids. I really had to think about whether or not that was going to be an issue with me.
I eventually came to the conclusion that it wasn't, but that's not universal. If a woman has something like 5 kids or kids that are just plain jerks, then that's liable to have an negative effect on our relationship.
I haven't yet run into any woman with kids that has met the above 'deal-killer' situation, so my assumption here is that those women aren't very common.
I guess this is just a long way of saying that it's not a big deal...but if you are getting serious with the woman there may be some legal schmegal issues that might crop up along with other 'expectations' related to college et al.
You'll obviously have to work those things out between you. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 11:52:10 AM | | I, personally, don't see anything wrong with a woman of your age having a child. For that matter, a woman of any age with a child is not problem. I'm just guessing, but maybe they are afraid that they can't be "Dads" anymore. Which is a shame, as you said, at this age we are a little more laid back. We've seen mistakes we've made with our own children and, hopefully, have learned more on how to deal with a young person. Then again, maybe they don't want to take up the responsibility of assisting in raising a child again. Dunno. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 3:01:03 PM | I am a women with no children. If you are looking to play happy families, go for it.
However, some of us have tried dating people with children, and found the issues too much. If some people choose not to date with people with children, why not just move on to people who would be interested. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 3:19:13 PM | | I like kids, I just don't like being stuck in one place. Some parents travel, have adventures, while others settle into one spot, their lives secure and routine. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 3:56:03 PM | | For me, it would be a deal-breaker, but that's just my personal preference. At this stage of life, I'm looking for freedom, travel, and adventures where me and my partner are not tied down by family responsibilities | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 5:45:02 PM | | I'm 44 with a 15 yr old. I won't consider dating a man who has fulltime custody of a child or children under the age of 15. I don't want to participate in a step-parent family and I don't want to be looking for a babysitter so we can go out for dinner or whatever. Call me selfish...I'm done with youngsters. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 7:18:30 PM | I am, and have always been, child-free by choice. I hesitate to contact any woman raising one child, and click away automatically from any with two or more... and I think my reasons may be the same as many other men:
I don't want to put myself in the middle of previous relationships, good or bad, with the child(ren)'s father. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 7:22:26 PM | | I dont believe that my children have scared a man away. Any man that was interested in dating me still had interest in dating after finding out of my children status. It just never seemed to be an issue. I made it an issue though as I refused to consider marriage or any live in arrangement while raising my kids as I did not feel comfortable with the complexities that would have followed. My children actually have several men in their lives that they can call on for anything because men will develop attachments to them and even if we are not together, I have never limited access or any relations that had developed. I have 4 daughters and my youngest is 15 now. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 7:25:32 PM | I have a 17 years old ..going to college in two months (yes Lawd) I perfer a man that if he does have children they be around the same age or older than mine ..Hey they can even have grandchildren.
I also prefer men that if they do have children they support them | |
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odee5
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Joined: 3/18/2006
Msg: 11 | |
| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 7:29:39 PM | | i have a 7 yr old boy i had later in life,best thing to ever happen to me,i get him every weekend and all summer long,people have a choice in life,if ya where ment to be together then it wont matter,if they cant take my son as part of me then they are the ones missing out.any parent will tell ya that there family means more to them and can bring more happyness than just one person,this is what works for me but might not work for every one else,,,brian | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 7:42:47 PM | | I'm 47 and have a 14 yr. old. The problem I run into is "her" driving them away because of jealously or disliking them. You know how it can be, no ones good enough for mom. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 8:35:45 PM | | I have a son 15 & a daughter that is 10. I started a bit later than some of my friends. I have friends, my age, that are grandparents & some that have older & younger kids. I wanted to graduate from the University & then party before I had kids & that worked for me!! | |
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tps629
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Joined: 3/28/2006
Msg: 15 | |
| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 9:38:13 PM | | Quite frankly I would prefer to date someone that has children around the ages of my children. My brother has a nine year old and my sister just adopted a Mogolian child (now 1 &1/2). | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 9:55:27 PM | Just read an article explaining how female brains get smarter after birth in species that have to take care of their young. It also stated that in species that mate for life and the male is involved with the child rearing, the male's intelligence increases as well.
For me, I would not see it as a probem (unless she enjoyed setting fires and throwing darts at your eyes) | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/16/2006 11:10:12 PM | I read that too women get smarter after childbirth
its also known that disease is much higher in those women that have never
had children.. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/17/2006 3:13:29 AM | When I was 50 my daughter was 10 no big deal, but I find women that haven't had their own kids don't relate that well, had their own space for so long only willin to share with another adult.
super what diseases | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/17/2006 7:37:53 AM | If people get so much smarter and healthier after they have children, why can't they figure out how how to have a happy marriage so that they won't have to bring their children into datingland. Sorry, the devil made me say it | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 5/17/2006 1:23:08 PM | | I won't date a woman who doesn't have kids. I don't believe I would be comfortable with someone who still has toddlers (egads!) as I don't want to start over. But there is a different level of understanding from parents versus non-parents. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 4/14/2007 10:50:58 AM | I'm 51 with a 12 year old son. I haven't dated for the last couple of years, but anyone that I would date would have to realize that my son and I are a package deal. Plus the fact that he really is a great kid!!!!!!!! | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 4/14/2007 11:24:16 AM | A good friend of mine, a 59 year old man, said he would in no way date a female in her 50's with a child or raising grandkids.
His reason? "I've been there, done that, was good at it, liked being a dad, but now is not the time of life to be getting into it again.. no way, no thanks, have fun." I think this may be true for many men that have raised kids and are now in their 50's. And it's understandable. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 4/14/2007 11:48:46 AM | Way back a million years ago before I was married I fell in love with a young woman. She had a child.
I fell in love with the child too. When her mother dumped me the child was devastated. I got over the mother eventually but the missing the child? That lingered for way too long and was way too painful.
So a woman with young kids? I don't want to get involved with them in case it does not work out with the mother, and most women don't want a revolving door of "mommy's friends" screwing up their kids heads.
Apart from the inconvenience young children impose there is the energy they take. Older adolescents are a different matter. Most older kids will stand back when their parents are establishing a new relationship so they are not a problem. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 7/13/2007 6:03:27 PM | | I am 51 with a 12 year old son. I also have a 26 year old daughter. They are both very important parts of my life. I, of course, am very picky who I introduce my son to. That is why I don't meet very many guys from a dating site. He's a gr8 kid. Also I have no problem dating a guy who has young children. | |
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| What about women my age with a child?
Posted: 7/13/2007 9:02:14 PM | Personally, my child comes first. Thats one of the first things I say - even before a date! Until my child reaches an independent age, then I'm not really interested in a man who is only interested in a single me. I'm not single, per se. Being widowed also throws a different light on the subject - I don't want to replace my late husband - I want a whole new relationship and I am quite happy to wait until I am ready for that.
I quite understand people who don't want to have a relationship with someone elses kids, particularly if their own have left or they chose to be childless. Thats their choice.
Mine is to start meeting like minded people - expand my boundaries, talk, laugh, play a little. Life is long enough for many wonderful relationships... with or without children! | |
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