| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/25/2006 2:25:54 PM | do to a bad car accident a few weeks ago ive been off from work .so i decided to volenter some of my time to a program called PACT (PARENTS AND CHILDREN TOGETHER) its a required class that you have to take in this state when you get a divorce and minor children are involved . there were 18 people in the class and they were asked if you love your children and they all said yes . but when they were asked why they love there children not one person in the whole class could answer that question . can you answer that question ?i know i can . i would like to hear everyones opinions on this.
........................................................................................................................jeferey | |
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| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/25/2006 2:31:21 PM | | If you could explain it, it wouldn't be unconditional love. | |
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| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/25/2006 2:36:18 PM | Wow, no one knew how to answer that question???? Amazing...well, considering I only have ten minutes before I need to be going, I will try to get it all out...
My children make my world a much better place, they make me happy when no one else can, they make me laugh, I know that they are a Gift from God that I will cherish forever and eternity, I love my children for all of the little things they do to make me smile, I love them because they grew inside me and created a loving bond between us, I love my children because of the way they make me feel when I pick them up from daycare and they come running up to me yelling, "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, I missed you!" I love my children for the way they make me feel when my daughter says "Mommy, you can always make my heart feel better, and I love you," and when my two year old son says, "I lub you too Mommy!" after I tell him how much I love them. I love them because of how they hug me, kiss me, and smile at me. I love them because they are the most beautiful children in the world to me. I love them because of the funny things they say and do. I love them just because of who they are!
I wish I had time to go on and on....but I don't....
In conclusion....It is so sad that a parent can't list a whole bunch of reasons they love their children. I love my kids and I know EXACTLY why!  | |
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| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/25/2006 3:04:11 PM | I love my children because they are unique and part of me.
I love my children because they are caring about not just me but of the world around them.
I love my children because when I'm feeling down, they are the ones that can lift my spirit.
I love my children because when THEY are down, I'm the one they come to for comfort.
I love my children because of all of the little things they bring to my life.
I love my children because all I have to do is think of them and it makes me smile.
I love my children because they are the only ones that have ever given me true unconditional love.
I love my children because my world would have never been the same without them in it.
I love my children because of so many things that could never be put into words...
I love my children for every grey hair in my head......
Michelle (25) 
Rachel (21)
Devin (19) | |
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Posted: 5/25/2006 3:05:02 PM | When someone that's basically a stranger asks me a question like that, I start feeling defensive. It sounds like the groundwork for manipulation. You list out A, B, and C, and they can start playing stupid what-if games that take away A, B, and C. Or, you list out A, B, and C, and they come back with "why didn't you include X, Y, and Z." It's like the philosophy classes that get into the "Why is stealing *really* wrong." debate.
I love my son, and the subject isn't open for scrutiny or debate. I probably would have kept my mouth shut in that situaiton also. | |
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| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/25/2006 3:42:54 PM | | i think the biggest reason i love my daughter is i know how much of a better person she has made me in only 2 year imagine the person i will be when she’s 18...i love her for all the lessons she has tough me like learning to love someone else so much that you would give you life for them i never believed in that crap until my princess now i would lay ne thing on the line 4 her. And most of all i love her because when im down in the dumps and life feels like its fallen apart she always comes ( nasty nose and all ) and gives me a big hug and pats my back and goes love u me me ( it’s the meme it always makes me smile lol | |
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| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/25/2006 4:22:41 PM | | Rusty's right... it's a loaded question. There really isn't a right answer. I mean you can say all you want, but honestly... love is something you can't explain. "Why do you love your mother?" "Because she worked three jobs!" "What if she only worked one, would you love her less or at all?" You can't explain why you love people, and especially your own child. If your child was a brat that caused you all sorts of grief you'd probably still love them, right? So the fact that they make you smile and yada yada yada is just icing on the cake. Seeing your child happy brings you joy, but that doesn't make you love them even more than you already do, correct? Love does it's own thing and doesn't really have a basis. | |
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Posted: 5/26/2006 4:58:57 PM | How do I love my sweet babyheads...let me count the ways...:D
They cause me to see life from a different perspective, they amaze me at how much they understand, which is much more than I understood at their age. They bless me when they are getting along, just to stand there and watch them interract peacefully..(for a few moments anyway!) Even when my kids do something they shouldn't, I love them. Sometimes when they are doing or saying something they shouldn't, it gets me laughing, bringing out the child in me. I look at them today and wonder, how did we get this far? My youngest is 9.
I have 4 kids | |
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Posted: 5/26/2006 5:06:41 PM | Why do I love my kids? LOL....cuz I do. My oldest son is fun, athletic,smart,sarcastic, snotty and a teenager....I adore all of his qualities...especially his acceptance of his siblings and their unique ways and he loves me even as flawed as I am lol
My middle son is nothing other than a walking angel. He believes in purity..kindness...laughter and fairness to everyone in the world...people (including myself) could learn a great deal from him
My youngest boy has taught me the difference way people learn, love, behave, communicate...he has brought me tolerance, patience and reminded me in the pure happiness in the simple things in life that adults sometimes take for granted...
I guess I love them all for who they are, and who I am because of them. | |
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Posted: 5/29/2006 12:48:44 AM | I love my daughter for every thing she is .. and everything she isnt .... everything she will be .. and everything she will never be.
I love her for the teaching me love like no other. For being my teacher in life since before she was born. Teaching me things Ive only heard of ... and never felt.
My only wish in life is that I can teach her even a fraction of what she taught me... because she taught me what life is ...
I love you Princess ....
You and me Baby ....Forever | |
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Posted: 5/29/2006 5:04:09 AM | ^^Oh my goshness^^
That's a beautiful post, North Exposed.
I could list a hundred thousand reasons why I love my children, but it's a love that is just about indescribable . . . I find it sad that some people can't *think* of any reasons as to why they love their kids, but at the same time, I can understand . . . need there be a reason for loving your children? Or can you simply just love them for no other reason than the fact that you do? Hmm, hard to explain.
Lovin my peanuts! Erik (3.5yrs), Emily (18mos), Drayden (3mos)
*hugs*
Scotts_Girl
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/29/2006 8:12:06 AM | I love my son because I see him as an individual in whom I had/have a great deal of involvement in 'molding' (for lack of a better word).
I see my efforts and my greatest achievements in him and I love him for being a part of me, yet so independent from me!!!
To know that there is a little person out there that I made, makes me smile everyday at any time!! | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/29/2006 12:22:36 PM | | I dont think the issue is THINKING about how you love them .. its simply not easy to put words to the deepest form of love that has ever existed ... we can all say we love our children ... but keep in mind ... spoken word is the poorest form of communication known to man ... so to put a feeling into words, is like converting glass to diamonds ... not imposible ... just damned hard | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/29/2006 12:43:11 PM | | I agree with Rusty, that if you have to think about why you love someone, then there might be a serious problem. However, where your children are concerned, I think as parents that we should remind ourselves, everyday, why we love them. Think about all those times when you are tearing your hair out and ready to scream!! lol lol Just thinking about all the sweet things they do, makes you feel so much better, and takes some of the heat out of the whatever the situation might be! So go ahead and list every tiny little thing you can think of, and then kiss them all over their little faces and thank god, that you can think of some!! We all know that there are some children out there, that don't have anyone who cares and that includes their so-called parents!!! So to my children, I love you because you are the most awesome people I know! I have watched you grow, learn and enjoy everything in your life, and I can only thank god that he allowed me to be here to see it!!!! | |
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| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/29/2006 4:01:29 PM | If you could explain it, it wouldn't be unconditional love.
I may not be able to explain it all but these are some....
I love my children for more reasons than there is room on this forum. Some reasons are unexplainable I agree with that, but some are.
I love my children for the wonder that I see in their eyes. The little things that they remind me not to take for granted..like the shape of a particular cloud, a fallen leaf, bubbles, bugs, dirt, splashing in the tub. The little things we forget to see wonder in every day that they think are just so magical.
I love my children for their genuineness. How many of us pass someone on the street that we haven't seen in ages and casually ask "how are you?"...now I ask you..how many of us actually mean it? My girls ask me how I am with genuine concern...you ok Mama? You happy Mama?
I love them for the giggles they bring. The silly yet profound things they come out with.
I love them for their innocence and how they remind me that we're not born mean, angry, hurtful, cruel...so we have a choice not to be those things.
I love them for the hugs and kisses I receive when I'm feeling low. For the tickles I receive when I need a giggle. The licks on the forehead when I'm in need of a little silliness. The dancing when I'm too tired to move, but we do it anyhow because "it's just plain fun".
I love them for the patience that they give me when I'm stressed to the max, and feel as if I'm falling apart and like I'm not a very good Mom because I'm doing it all alone. They tell me I'm the best Mama in the world..and the best Dad too! They give me the strength to carry on and do whatever I need to do to make sure that they have a life they deserve.
I love them because they are the wonders and joys of my life and without them I can't think of any reason for me to be here.
There are millions of other reasons..but this is a brief overview. | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/29/2006 6:01:01 PM | What a great question!
First the question is unclear; semantics are in the way.
What is love?
My working definition is an irrational affection. That said love is not what you get, but what you give. Most people agree that love is constant. So, loving children is a genetic imperative to perpetuate the species, where a parent [genetic or otherwise] is driven to care for and make strong the next generation.
That all sounds very cold and clinical.
All of the above is colored by our own principles, for better or worse. For me to love a child is to give to them all the love you have, to fill them with all that you have to offer, to protect them from true harm and help them grow to be the best, strongest and most capable people that they can. Closer inspection would show that those are the principles that I hold dear, so in a sense that is a form of self love.
The reason the question is so great is because it exposes the dilemma that can come between giving love or true love and self love. The pitfall is to think that what we believe in or is in our best interest, is in the best interests of the child.
Thanks sly848484, for sharing such an illuminating question! | |
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Posted: 5/29/2006 6:08:11 PM | I love my children becuz they are a part of ME.
I love my children becuz they are a part of what was once a great relationship.
I love my children becuz without them I would be no one....
I love my children becuz they have made my life worth living.
I love my children becuz not one day is the same.... they always do something either good or bad.
I love my children becuz.... well the list could go on... some parents may not be able to express why they love their child(ren) but they know that they have unconditional love for them. This thread was a good one though..... it got me thinking. I may not be the best mom in the world but I am the best mom to my kids. | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/29/2006 6:31:21 PM | I love them, because I do.
I love them without limits.
I love them without question.
I love them without reservation.
I love my kids because they are the future.
Because they hold what I will someday be. | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/29/2006 6:38:00 PM | I didn't read the other posts cause I wanted to do my own thing here, but here's mine.
I love who they are, thier funny personalities with all thier funny quirks
I love who they have the potential to become,
I love them for coming into my life and making me realize what it is all about
I love them for occasionally making me miserable!
I love spending time with them and hearing thier ideas and thoughts, they are so wise for thier ages
I love them because they were sent to me to keep in my care, and sometimes I feel like it's the other way around | |
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Posted: 5/30/2006 4:36:14 AM | AMEN to thatguyhim and Rusty!!!!
why do people love their severly autistic and mentally retarded children, who don't respond emotionally, whose only activities during the day are rocking back and forth, eating, shitting and sleeping?
Because it's unconditional. The only explanation I personally can think of for this is evolution. We are biologically wired to love our children, to want to provide for them, to nurture them, to ensure greater rates of offspring survival and therefore survival of the species.
Sorry to be so scientific. It doesn't change the magic you feel for your kids though, it just helps to explain WHY you love them.
:) | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/30/2006 6:06:12 AM | I love her because she is of me but not like me. She's brave and courageous, always singing and happy. She makes me laugh til I cry and she makes me proud. She is a wonderful distraction and the focus of social events- i don't have to make small talk because of her. She is beautiful, barmy and full of fun and provides an excellent reason for me to hang upside on the monkey bars. I understand her to a point and she is mine.
And she likes all the stuff I do.....or is it the other way round? | |
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| you wont believe this [why do you love your children?]
Posted: 5/30/2006 12:00:30 PM | WOW no one could answer that question...Holy crap.
I believe that god or someone gave me a gift to be able to have children. Now they are older and are my very best friends…we laugh, play and love each other.
Yes there have been hard times but all good things came out of it. We have been through a lot but it only made us stronger. We respect each other and help one another in every way.
I love them because they are a part of me. | |
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Posted: 5/30/2006 12:44:44 PM | > snowflake_jess: why do people love their severly autistic and mentally retarded children, who don't respond emotionally, whose only activities during the day are rocking back and forth, eating, shitting and sleeping? Because it's unconditional. :)
Jess, you are still very young, far younger than your years.
Perhaps it is a bonding that occurs when you care for them around the clock, exhausted, yet happy. Perhaps it is because you can see I them a world that is not available to others.
You state you are a student. I would propose to you that you work with autistic children and write a paper about how capable they are. Look into their lives and see the grace and beauty in it. See that the lights are on and somebody is home. See the suffering that they endure as they are pulled about like an unwanted sack of flour. Hear their pain and know that it is not necessary, because they can find peace and contentment, but not with the narrow minded, ignorant people they are with, but in a separate world or goodness and light.
If you read the material they laugh and smile and do everything that a typical child does. The sad truth is that they don’t do it with others.
I have seen children open up and demonstrate abilities way beyond what is believed of them. There are jokes that the world today (this forum) was shaped in no small way by autism. I have seen young children who are emotionally barren line up for a snuggle and hug from a total stranger. I have seen a toddler who does not make eye contact look deeply into the eyes and spirit of a stranger and know that she is a good person. I have seen maladapted adults, the product of loving, but misguided caregivers rise above their circumstance and speak out, despite their profound language deficits.
But in the final analysis, you are young and do not know love. You may know lust and joy, but not love, because, love is its own reward. | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 25 | |
| you wont believe this
Posted: 5/30/2006 4:46:36 PM | i love my kids because they give without asking
i love my kids because they know mom will always be there
for the hugs and understanding when there are no words to be said
for saying i missed you at the end of a school day
for being proud of thier accomplishments no matter how little
for seeing the world through thier own eyes not the way life tells them to
for being the spitting image of me and teaching me my mother really was right
for also teaching thier mom to value and respect my own mother and thank her
for raising her own daughter well... | |
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