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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > How do you say goodbye to the one you love?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Trigger Happy
Joined: 3/13/2006
Msg: 1
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Just wondering (not for me), but how do you say goodbye to the one you love, say you were emmergrating and they had the idea that you were coming back but you were not?

How hard is saying goodbye to the one face to face.

(once again not for me lol)
 iAmMe=)
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 2
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 5:19:35 AM
I said goodbye to someone that I loved once, well I really just told him to **** off and I never wanted to talk to him again cause he screwed me over so bad, it was one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do. People say that it gets easier with time, but it was the opposite with me. It was easy at first, and it just got harder and harder as time went on. I wish i could talk to him now, i really miss him!
 smart*ss
Joined: 8/9/2005
Msg: 3
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 5:20:59 AM
Uhhh why to they have the idea that I'm coming back when I'm really not??? Why am I lying about not coming back? That's not very nice of me now is it? Expecially if this is "the one". Of course it's hard saying good bye duh!! (sorry...said that outloud didn't I?) It's never easy saying good bye to someone you love....never easy seeing the hurt in their eyes....hearing it in their voice.....watching the tears well up in their eyes. Never an easy thing to see especially if you love the person. But having said all that, if you errrr this other peron you're asking this question for.....really loves the person they're saying good bye to, then they owe it to them to do say it face to face. E-mail.....that's just wrong. On the phone....not nice. Voice mail.....no that's just tacky. Time to put yer big boy pants on and take it like a man.....& when it all over and done with......go to the pub and drown your sorrows like the rest of us do.....
 blindheart1
Joined: 6/5/2005
Msg: 4
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 6:48:05 AM

go to the pub and drown your sorrows like the rest of us do.....


Yeah, I agree ! Here ya go, take em with ya for one final drink and make a toast...

Heres To You
And Here's To Me
And Friends We'll Always Be
But If We Ever Disagree
Fuk You
And Here's To Me !!!

*Clink Glasses*
 Solitude100years
Joined: 5/30/2006
Msg: 5
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 9:01:01 AM
How about singing Auld Lane Syne
 rainbowfishh
Joined: 4/20/2006
Msg: 6
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 9:03:45 AM
Only you know

because we don't know that person.


The right way will vary from person to person
as to who is recieving the goodbye.
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 7
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 12:04:19 PM
My first true love... I had to leave. It was the hardest decision in my life.

Simply put... we'd known each other since childhood. Grew up together.
And, we eventually started dating, and realized that we were madly in love.

All her life, she wanted to be a model.
She loved the idea of the being on the runway, being in the spotlight.
She'd done catalogs and youth pageants and stuff all the time.

Well, one day, she received a call from her agent. She was being given the chance to go to Europe for a big show. It would be her chance to finally do what she'd always wanted. And if things went well, it would be the first step on her career.

The problem is... I wasn't ready for that kind of life. Moving constantly... going from country to country, show to show. Living out of hotels. Never really having a place to call home...

I couldn't do it.
So, she was going to turn it down... she wanted to pass up her one chance... just to be with me.

But... I couldn't let her. I couldn't allow her to throw away her dreams for me.
It would always haunt her, giving up that chance. She would always wonder if she could have made it.
And I couldn't let that happen.

So, I told her to go. To take the offer, and do what she's wanted to do since she was a little girl.
She naturally refused at first... and we spent a few days talking about it...
Eventually, I just told her that I couldn't stand in the way of her dreams. It wasn't fair to her. And even though I love her more than anything, I know that it would make her happy.
And I told her, that I would always care for her... but that I wouldn't let her throw it away for me.

Simply put... I ended a glorious relationship for her to be able to to what she always wanted to do.

She's still doing it.
Living the life of a supermodel.
And having a wonderful time.

It was incredibly hard to do.
But sometimes, you have to give up the one you love... because you love them just that much. Their happiness means more to you than just being with them.
 Teusweet
Joined: 11/6/2005
Msg: 8
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 12:28:06 PM
I like my toast better:

Here's to the men that i love,
here's to the men that love me,
but the men that I love,
aren't the men that love me,
so F*** all you men here's to me?

Ok I dont really feel that way....just had to share. There are good men out there, there are bad men out there....the good ones are far and in between...However if you live your life with someone that obviously doesnt make you happy....are you really living?????

Just food for thought!

Teu
 rider64
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 9
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 12:30:52 PM
I recently said good bye to someone I was in love with (still am). I think the only way to do it is face-to-face, with respect and honesty and as gently as possible.
 chameleontat
Joined: 4/3/2006
Msg: 10
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 12:37:20 PM
Adam--- That's to cool are you still friends with her.
 refusnik
Joined: 10/24/2004
Msg: 11
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 1:08:12 PM

Just wondering (not for me), but how do you say goodbye to the one you love, say you were emmergrating [sic] and they had the idea that you were coming back but you were not?


The mature, functional way to say goodbye under those circumstances would be to have an open, honest conversation in which the other person is very clearly told what is going to happen. Being open and honest with someone is a sign of true love - it might be more difficult at that moment, but in the long run, there will likely be less suffering and less unresolved issues.

The way it will likely happen is the person leaving will dangle that string of "I'll be back," leaving the person that is staying behind dangling, wondering, and who knows what else.
 purplestardust101
Joined: 4/27/2006
Msg: 12
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 1:17:40 PM
Adam...you have TRULY known love...and I admire that very much...that you thought of her instead of yourself...I hope someday you find that kind of love again under different circumstances...for you truly do have a Beautiful Heart...Ladies...here you go...someone who does know how to love...
~Micheline~
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 13
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 2:20:57 PM
*Blush*

Thank you Micheline. :)
You're too sweet my dear.

*Hugs*

Yeah, we're still good friends. And we always will be.

Some people mistake love for desire.
Loving someone doesn't mean that you want to have them. It means that you want nothing but their happiness.
 MichelleRenee
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 14
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 2:45:19 PM

Loving someone doesn't mean that you want to have them. It means that you want nothing but their happiness.


Well said.


How do you say goodbye to the one you love?


Happened to me before, too. My ex was in the military and trying to get into the Air Force Academy. It was his dream to be a fighter pilot. I knew when I first started dating him that he'd probably be accepted, but I didn't think I was going to fall in love him in the meantime.

I knew what would happen if he got in. I was his first girlfriend due to his insecurites. I knew that once he got away he would want to experience new relationships with other women...naturally. I knew that I would eventually get over him, and that I wouldn't still want to be with him when he got out--not to mention that he probably wouldn't want to be with me either.

Well, he did get accepted, and he spent his last night with me at my house. I barely slept and was just so sad. It wasn't even a question of whether he should stay or go. We both thought he should.

He actually graduated this year, and now he's going on to his new life. I still love him and want the best but would never consider being with him again as our plans for life are way too different and contradict eachother's goals.

Still, every time I hear that song by Bob Segar "We Got Tonight", I cry just remembering our last night together. But I'm thankful for the mutual relationship and breakup. It was bittersweet...not heartwrecking.

I knew the truth, and anyone in love deserves nothing less.
 Who Me???
Joined: 12/16/2005
Msg: 15
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 3:11:46 PM
The ultimate gift of love is to let them go.

I too let someone move across the country because his 3 kids really needed him back.

I grew up in a broken home and remember being their ages and thinking I'd give my right arm to have my daddy back. He didn't want to go without me and i didn't want him to go....but I knew his kids were everything to him and I needed to give him the ultimate gift of love by watching him walk out of my life and back into theirs.

It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do.

To the OP Tell whomever to be honest...if they are emmgrating and not planning on a return then they have to say so. The other person will cling on to hope forever waiting which is worse then letting them hurt and move on in time with their lives.
 purplestardust101
Joined: 4/27/2006
Msg: 16
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 4:19:26 PM
Adam....You are truly a very wonderful man...You have Truly learned that this is what True Love means...that it is so much more than just the desires...it is the Knowing that you are doing something for them that pleases them....so much...even if that something means letting them go...because you've thought of only them...that is....True Love...for when you think of the other person in your life first...that is the Ultimate Love you could ever give anyone...
Hugs...
~Micheline~
 PiEd_PiPeR
Joined: 9/12/2005
Msg: 17
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 6:01:14 PM
well, If some one is mis treating you, then they are NOT worth your time at all, They are only taking you for Granted, and not really caring for you,.

The best thing to do for yourself, Is really to let them Go, It may not be really easy at times, But you must move on for your own well being, Time will heal any trouble thats in your heart.
 daisie
Joined: 9/22/2004
Msg: 18
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 6:21:27 PM
Saying goodbye when you are still in love is very difficult and painful. But sometimes it is what must be done...I've had to do it and I still remember that heart wrenching pain too well. The best thing is to make it fast. Definnite and fast. No wishy washy stuff. If you're not coming back and there is NO WAY you can work it out together you need to make that crystal clear. Then go away...don't do that old breakup, get back together, breakup again, get back together again routine.
 prolibertate
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 19
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/2/2006 7:44:56 PM
OP, if one loves another person, then 1) why are they leaving them and 2) why wouldn't they be honest and communicate that they weren't coming back instead of letting the person think they were? When you love someone, you have to have honest and open conversation.
 johnlvs2run
Joined: 2/23/2006
Msg: 20
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/10/2006 7:55:30 PM
This is such a wonderful thread so I am posting here just to save it.

Thanks for all of the comments.
 Coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 21
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How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/10/2006 11:50:30 PM
I said "goodbye" to someone I loved.....

I accepted a job offer.... and I didn't have a ring on my finger.... so I took the job.... I hated living in Houston...

We laughed we cried.. it was hard....
I told him I loved him.......... (I've only told 2 men that) and I told him that if it didn't work out with us at least we knew how we DESERVE to be loved...and treated and not to allow any less!
 Teusweet
Joined: 11/6/2005
Msg: 22
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 6/29/2006 12:28:28 PM
I finally said goodbye to the one I loved because he found true happiness in someone else...I have never seen him happier and well that makes me happy to see him smiling all the time. He knows I will always love him (cant stop that) but knows that I have finally moved on.
 MysticOne
Joined: 2/17/2006
Msg: 23
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 11/20/2006 3:04:35 PM
This thread is such a wonderful thread and it's actualy bringing tears to my eyes. Gawd I'm too much a romantic.
 Huggablehottie
Joined: 8/3/2006
Msg: 24
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 11/20/2006 6:37:35 PM
I would also say it is extremely hard to do, especially
face to face, because then you wouldn't want to leave!
 Sadie415
Joined: 5/15/2006
Msg: 25
How do you say goodbye to the one you love?
Posted: 11/20/2006 8:16:05 PM
My mother immigrated here from another country. When she said goodbye to her family, they didn't realize they would never see her again. For 45 years she held it in her heart to go back again someday. So how is one to know something like this will happen?
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