| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/18/2006 11:01:54 PM | | Right now, I certainly feel like calling it quits on trying to find someone. Anymore I just feel it is impossible for me to find someone out there who I can fall in love with and who will actually fall in love with me. I feel like I have better odds of winning the lottery. I'll admit I haven't explored all avenues for looking for someone, but anymore I think what is the point? Anytime I find someone I'm interested in, it always comes up they have a boyfriend, fiance, or husband and never have an real interest in me. Others here have said that I have be confident in myself and not look as hard and then it'll happen when I least expect it, but I feel that just will not be the case with me. So maybe I should just call it quits and enjoy being single if that's possible. My biggest dream is to be with someone, but maybe I should just focus on something else. Anyone else here feel this way? | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 2:48:08 AM | | hun you are not alone as ive given up looking along time ago before my baby was born and hes 1 years old now,just me and my 2 kids now as ive found now its the best way for me as i cant get hurt and used again.good luck and all the best.xxxx | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 6:39:08 AM | hello0 my name is diane and I live in manchester. Yes at times I have thought of giving up, but so do all of us at one pooint of another. You have to look inside yourself and see your good points and I am sure you have plenty, they say if you don't love yourself how can you love anyone else. Being single can get lonely but if you are looking for love they say you don;t find it, I still have not found Mr. Right yet and I do get lonely and i am afraid of being alone allo my life but I believe in fate so don;t give up, love yourself as I am sure there are many people out there who will once they meet you and see what a caring and loving person you are love diane | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 6:54:40 AM | I can so relate to that feeling aswell, there is someone I really like on this site but alas he is not interested in me in the slightest.  It seems them that we feel connected with or attracted to as murphy's law will have it they are not into us.   so what can one do but quietly conclude to the idea that giving up is probably the easiest way to go about it all, and jsut resign to chatting in forums and envying them that have the "Perfect Relationship".. oh well thats life i guess... | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 7:07:35 AM | Yes I think about it all the time to give up. Since my ex and I been apart for five years, but my daughter won't let me give up she said they is some one out there for you. Her husband pass away and she was married for 24 years, and she look for a long time after and she stop looking and then she found her husband and they been married for a little over a year. She said Mom don't look and then you will find him and he will be the right one. It's seem hard to find some one at my age and you are younger and they will be the right one for you out there so don't give up hope/
Taladu | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 7:24:29 AM | | Everyone does, indeed, feel like giving up from time to time. I know I certainly do, but you have to be an optimist and keep trying. I'm in the same boat that you're in, my friend. I've sent out what seems like hundreds of emails and received very few replies. The one's I do receive usually say " Thanks, but I'm seeing someone else". That doesn't keep me from trying though. Very likely, you won't meet her online, but by accident somewhere. There are those who, I have heard, who did find someone online. Just think of this as another meeting place and remember that there aren't any "perfect" matches, either, and you do have to compromise a little with people. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 7:34:43 AM | I think we all have ups and downs.....
Give up... then start to look again... it's normal..
I will tell you I got REALLY sick of hearing.. it will happen when your not looking!
I used to joke around that I had been not not looking for a really long time and that didn't seem to work!
I thought everyone was married... gay or engaged!
Being on a dating site I think will increase ur odds...... of controlling your destiny.. you may find more people that are seeking similar things.....
I look forward to the day when I'm in a loving relationship......I miss that a lot... I've only TRULY had that once in my life... ...sometimes it sux to be alone... but I'd rather be alone and lonely but happy then with someone and miserable! | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 7:35:43 AM | | Getting real close....I don't have a problem finding someone to respond but they just will not reply after a few replys!! I wish people wer more honest and just say whatt they feel. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 8:09:42 AM | | Women say they get a lot of emails, which may be true, but I don't understand the reason why they just correspnding without explanation. That's happened to me as well. Still, this forum isn't about that and we're getting a little off-track. My main point is, don't give up and keep a stiff upper lip. Nothing is ever gained without taking a risk and if you do give up you're only failing yourself. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 8:18:36 AM | | If you feel like deleting your profile then go ahead and no just that. If you feel that you haven't explored all avenues then get off your ass and stop whining and explore those avenues. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 8:46:18 AM | | See that's where it gets confusing to me. In one instance I'm told to go out and use all avenues to find someone, yet in another instance I'm told by others that I SHOULDN'T go looking for it, that it happens when I least expect it, so which is it? Should I just quit and hopefully let it happen on its own (if that is possible) or should I continue looking which also has not yielded results except in disappointment? | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 9:02:11 AM | | I think about giving up all the time but the only thing about that is all those who caused the pain would win and beat you! thants not what you want at all! you wanna be stronger than them and stay in the game just keep ur head up and ur eyes open! | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 9:14:34 AM | | Thanks for the kind words St. John Cutie. And hoopdog69, I do get what you're saying and I do understand that women like confident men, I'm just trying to figure out if I should just be confident in being single and stop looking maybe that could lead to someone unexpectedly down the road like some here have said. I don't feel hopeless like I want to give up on life and that it isn't worth living. Been down that road once and I will NOT go that route again, but at the same time why keep putting myself up for disappointment when I keep looking and continuously get rejected or have no interest shown towards me? I'm just trying to figure out if I should stop and try to be happy being single though it is hard lots of times. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 9:43:15 AM | | You'll get tons of rejections. I know I have but I'm still waiting on the one woman who won't. If you want to give dating a break, fine. Just don't take too long to get back into the game or you may lose out to another guy the very woman who might have shown an interest in you. The ultimate decision is up to you. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 9:54:30 AM | | You do have a good point there cause I could always be wondering to myself "What if". The more I think about it now the more I think that either scenario could happen. I could still keep looking and find it or stop and it some how finds me which has happened to others. Do you also think that the time has to be right also? I've been told that when the time is right it'll happen. There just seems to be so many variables. Why can't it be much easier!!! | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 10:01:42 AM | | Nothing good ever comes to us easily. You have to work a little at anything and take chances. If you don't put yourself out there no-one will even know you exist. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 10:33:34 AM | Yeah, I hear you friend. I belonged to match.com for 3 years and got zip. I joined eharmony and 3 months later, I met a couple of friends, but that was about it. I feel like I have a better chance of getting struck by lightning. I belonged to Photodate a long time ago, and got nothing out of that. I have also joined several smaller dating services and gotten nothing. This has been going on for around 20 years. I once considered a "dating coach" but bagged it for some reason. I have 3 other friends who are in the same boat and 2 of them have all but given up. The 3rd guy is still looking, but not coming up with too much; and he goes out all the time. I don't know. I guess I am going to stay single; actually I am sort of getting used to the idea, but a "mate" would be nice to have. My brother does better than I do, but he meets women at work. He said he once considered eharmony, but bagged it after reconsidering. I think he is sort of content to have friends he can do things with even though he said he would get married (still) if he could find the right one. He is 51. So yeah, I hear ya.
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Catwm
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Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 22 | |
| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 10:33:49 AM | Before you throw in the towel, use the down time ( away from dating/searching ) to just enjoy life.
Do some of the things you want to do and be comfortable with you.
I would rather be alone ( by myself ) than with the wrong person and be lonely. There is a difference.
Take a break if you want, the online dating sites can become an addicting alternate life for many people and they end up absorbed into the box. Get out, get away. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 10:59:57 AM | | wsrfr, I also did try eharmony and though I didn't find the right one for me, out of all the dating sites I've tried, that one was actually the most successful one for me. I actually met someone in person from there and we did go on 2 outings, but it never went further then that. We just didn't click. I may give eharmony another go in the future, but right now I think I just might take a break from looking. Don't know how long it will be, but I'm pretty sure I'll be back looking again soon. I wish the best of luck to you as well that maybe someone will come along for you. I always worry that I'll end up all the way in my 60s before I find someone. | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 11:46:58 AM | Sweetguy
I can fully sympathise with your apparent need to open this thread. Almost resigned to the possibility of becoming a mere forum contributor myself. However, viewing things with our optimistic heads stuck firmly in place, who truly knows what's around the proverbial blind corner until we turn it, eh? Who knows    could just be round the next bend!
Womanlyspice
You said: "I can so relate to that feeling aswell, there is someone I really like on this site but alas he is not interested in me in the slightest."
As you're obviously an intellegent and attractive young lady, seems to me that's his loss and, as time may well reveal in the future, possibly your gain. Best let the story unfold all by itself.  Just make sure you have a little fun between chapters! 
Regards
BB | |
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| Has anyone here given up or thinking about it?
Posted: 6/19/2006 11:58:56 AM | I myself have wondered about just giving up too. I think it just gets to a point where you see everything as a waste of time, and it can actually feel like you might not be what women want. But the best thing i think, is to just be strong and hold on.
From what i've seen, there's a better chance of meeting up someone nice in here, than there is at match.com and other sites (Believe me, i tried a few of those sites... got 0 people interested in me, but in here at least i can say i had a couple of women interested in me!) | |
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