| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 9:34:17 AM | | Just curious if guys actually read the profiles before they decide to email/chat with someone. I seem to get chatting with guys who haven't bothered to read my profile and then I wonder why we aren't connecting. Can you give reasons why? | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 9:43:15 AM | Either one of 2 reasons. They are lazy or is looking for a connection through chatting to see where it goes. I know I always read the whole profile when I have an interest towards the person or when I have a nice conversation with her.
Also theres that part where guys may have a fear of not being able to ask about you if they know everything about you from reading your profile. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 9:46:34 AM | I can not give a reason why someone would NOT read a profile first before starting up anything. I can take a good guess, they see a picture and like what they see and thats all that matters to them, which would easily tell you what their true intentions are. I am big on intentions because someones actions expose their true intentions. This is not a bad thing if a guy is after one thing (sex), but if it is not what the women is after then if you come across someone who hasn't even read your profile, then I would tell them I am not JUST after sex, and they should get the hint and move on. I hope this helps.  | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 9:54:33 AM | I very seldom make first contact with women (other than in the capacity
of a forum moderator). If I do make first contact...it's almost always
because of something that they have posted in the forum. But, I do
read their pro before I mail them.
/Dog | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 10:01:15 AM | | Profiles are like movie reviews or Cliff's Notes. They may provide a thorough description, but the individual's texture is lost in the translation. That's probably where the problems are coming from. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 10:23:23 AM | I email based on either one. Pic to me alone is not as important as the profile overall.
I have answered ads that have no pic at all if the profile sounds compatible with me. Generally that is what I look for, how well I think I would fit with the person and vice versa, if we have potential things in common.
Mostly I look for "red flags" that would indicate they would NOT be a good match for me... and just don't even bother emailing them.
So pretty much every woman I send a message to is a potentially good match as far as I'm concerned. A majority of them say they want a nice guy, someone with a sense of humor, all that, and that is me. So I don't feel like I'm deluding myself by writing them or anything.
The only time I kinda hesitate sometimes is age range. I know some younger women (24-25) may have a problem going much more than 10 years over, others don't have a problem at all with it, you just never know right up front, but I would rather write and find out than not take the chance. You just never know what might happen.
Bryan | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 11:18:45 AM | Thanks for all your answers. The reason for the post is that I have been getting guys IM'ing me and they haven't even read my profile. Than of course once I question them on it, they make up an excuse or break off the chat. The one guy started asking if I was "by myself" and wouldn't answer my questions, I cut him off after that. I don't mind if guys want to chat, but at least read my profile as well as look at my pic, than at least we will have something to start chatting about.
Thanks again, and feel free to tell me what you think about my profile, it might need some tweaking.
Missy Gidget
[We have a specific forum for that./Dog]Profile Reviews | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 12:42:30 PM | Bryan, I like your answer. The Red Flags are a major factor. Too much self-pity is a big one, "prefer not to say" about being married or drug use are two big ones, and there are a myriad of other things.
Missygidget, I think one problem might be your restrictions for responses. You have a very narrow field of people that can contact you, despite having a good profile (not to mention you're a pretty woman, but that's not part of what we're talking about, here). At the very least, you should include "friendship", as it's always best to enjoy doing things with the person you eventually choose for a mate.
And yes, some of us actually read the profiles rather than letting the Pavlovian reflexes ("ding!", slobber) take over after seeing the pics. Men are generally visual creatures, true, but some of us do actually enjoy having something in common with a chosen mate. It just makes it so much easier to have a relationship if you both enjoy the same things.
One more point, although it's amazing how few people actually understand this: A profile is sort of like a Cliffs Notes of a person. It gives clues to a personality, but it's not the definition. Despite having everything in common 100%, it is possible that the manner in which a person goes about it is something the other person might not understand...and therefore not make the "connection".
Hope that helps,
~W. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 1:17:28 PM | | Well...if she has a kick a$$ picture...that leeds me to her profile....then that leeds me to read it to see if I think she is cool...then I actually think before giving her a note....as to not sound completly retarded. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 2:31:57 PM | | Thanks for the response. I was thinking I was being a little restrictive, but even with restrictions, I still get the "losers" who just want to have *****chatting. I guess I just don't get that kinda stuff. And thanks for the commpliment, to bad you don't live closer, all the nice guys live far away, "sigh". | |
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tinum
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Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 12 | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 3:28:09 PM | I think both are equally important.
Obviously the picture is the first thing you notice, and then I take a look at the profile and see if I can get a feel for that person through the info they provide. If they don't write much if anything, or there are some compatibility issues then I move on. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 3:39:20 PM | i bet the men who say they read all the profile don't read profiles of women they don't find attractive to them. and if they are still here then those profiles they read and pic they seen went no where.
i cut to the chase and have the same out come but i did'nt have to waste time reading a womans posted book. they all pretty much say the samethings as i use to read them before i smarten up.
i look at the ones that i am attracted too. look at the age and relationship wanted. if it fits my age and relationship then i only emailed. never im'd. and as i have heard from a forum its the women that pick the men anyway which i find to be true. we send the ball rolling to you, its you that either roll it back or just do nothing. then we go to the next woman of interest.
call me shallow call me lazy. call me whatever, but i saved time.hehe
good thread OP | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 3:54:23 PM | Pic first. Definately. That's the "approval".
Then, description second. And yes, I read all of it. I'm looking for a reason why I shouldn't send an email. That includes distance, social habits, or if they specified one of my qualities that they don't like. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 4:12:42 PM | You always have to read the profile. I've seen a lot of women's profiles with gorgeous pictures, (like yours), but after reading the profile realize that we have nothing in common or that she's looking for someone completely different from me, or that she lives a long way away from me and doesn't want a long-distance relationship, (like you. See, I actually read your profile). In those cases I wouldn't waste either of our time trying to contact her. Don't know why other guys aren't reading your profile.
knopper3 | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 4:21:12 PM | I e-mail based on both. I mention what we have in common and a few interests of mine.
Then,  .
the next time I'm on I check my mail: Nada 
I check the sent messages: "Read" or "Read and Deleted". 
Then I delete them from my favorites list (if I put them on there). 
Why?, you ask?
Maybe because we have to send out 5 personalized e-mails every sitting to possibly get 1 reply,
or if we want to go with the generic script we can do 20-50 (I guess).
We sometimes get tired and send a generic script after being "read and deleted" so many times.
With seeing and responding to so many profiles, it is difficult sometimes to remember who you are and what we had in common.  | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 5:00:56 PM | | I base them on both. Just know that us guys are highly visual beings and looks play an important part of our decision process. | |
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arri
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Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 20 | |
| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 6:42:28 PM | | The usual process is picture first and then the profile .. but then again contact can be either start or avoided based on either. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/3/2006 8:14:03 PM | usually the pic that catches me, but i check out the rest of the profile -unless its too boring, then i will only check out the stats. some profiles are so boring or negative, i cant help but to move on. -your suppose to be giving us men a reason to contact you, not convincing us to leave.
i love the forums, thats where people show their true personality... -and their wild side. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/4/2006 11:14:20 PM | *Looks around to see if any pontential ladies are listening.... as usual finds none* I run it like a screening process if she half passes I give her a message. I look at her 1 photo that comes up first then read her smoker/drinker/hangout or dating thing.... then interests... then profile... then check out the rest of her pics.... cold... but effecient. If I see the slightest potential in all of the areas she's in. | |
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| Do you email based on pic or profile?
Posted: 7/4/2006 11:28:30 PM | I read the profile.
That's what's important.
The pictures are only there to give me a face to put to the person I'm reading about. ;) | |
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