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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/8/2006 6:07:49 PM | If you'd like an honest review of your profile, I'll be happy to help.
The only thing I ask is that you tell me what you want. If you just want an honest review of what is written, let me know. And if you want suggestions on what to add, let me know.
I'm also willing to help with grammatical errors and/or spelling mistakes upon request. Will not fix others that you don't want fixed.
Will NOT review any profile should it contain a snake picture! Please remove any pictures before you ask for it to be reviewed. | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/8/2006 6:36:01 PM | | i would love any help you can give...review, suggestions the works | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/8/2006 7:11:11 PM | You have a wonderful start, btw. You have the kind of profile that makes me want to contact you (if you were in my area.) You're not just someone I'd want to date, but also someone I'd like to be friends with.
That being said...
Women talk about how they want a nice guy who is honest and doesnt play games ect. well thats who I try to be in a nutshell. I don't cheat, period. And I dont want someone who does so if you are in any kind of relationship I am not interested.I try not to lie, I don't screw people over! trust is a precious thing.
I think that there are better ways to say these things. For example, I am a one woman man and expect the same. I'm honest about what I want and don't waste too much time on people who can't return the same. I am someone who is your friend and to me, that includes respecting you.
Nothing wrong with the way you put it, exactly, just kind of self-righteous to me. And as a human, we are all prone to those things, so it's best to make it known that you try not to.
Definitely expand on your interests. What kinds of intelligent conversation do you enjoy? What kinds of books do you read? What kinds of movies do you watch? And any other interests we should know about?
Did really enjoy the first date and absolutely loved how you threw about your daughter in there. But I always enjoy someone who is able to tell things slowly and work them into conversations rather than outright tell them. Do you write, by any chance?
Good stuff.
And I know you said works, but I did leave out correcting spelling mistakes unless you really want 'em corrected. And only if that's a part of you.
And try to have more variety of pictures and if possible, some full body shots. Perhaps you should get some of you smiling as well. People are intimidated by pictures of people if they're not smiling. | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 5:49:20 AM | | Hi shaunamarie. I need all the help i can get ,know i need to get better pics [working on it ].my profile is dull and boring ?? .Help me spruce it up please . cheers . | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 7:28:59 AM | Ok, it'll be easier for me to do it this way.
music countryside travelling
pubs n clubs with my mate s meeting new ppl that like me
must have a good s o h because i do like a good laugh
You should definitely avoid using lingo such as soh. Took me a good five minutes to figure it out. And you should also take the time to use and instead of "n". I'm all for typing as you speak, but so many people will just not a have a clue what you are trying to say and won't take the time to figure it out. It's different if you're talking with someone one on one, if you don't understand something, it's easier to just ask that person what they mean.
You did great on music, countryside, travelling. You should try to use a one word description for the others. Such as just pubs, clubs, spending time with that special person, a good sense of humor.
About Mehave good s o h ,so sorry no dour ppl allowed eh ? .And because i run a pub ,no fishing for free you guy,s eh .I will update on this soon .basically im looking for new friend,s to have a drink and a laugh with .So if you have a good s o h ,and like going out drinking and having a laugh ?? ,give,s a shout ,im in . .
What's a dour person? Commas are used to separate thoughts, not parts of the word. So there's no need for a comma in guys. And there is no need for a space between eh and the period. As soon as you're done the word, that's where you put the period. No need for a comma between friends either.
And try actually spelling out the whole sentence and avoid using lingo. What I mean, is that instead of "gives a shout, I'm in". That just doesn't make any sense whatsoever. What I think you're trying to say is give me a shout. This is your first impression on a person. And possibly your last. So make a great one.
First Dateif there was a 1st date .[no one know,s what,s round the corner ??].Need to be somwhere public ,in case i need to do a runner [joking of course ] lol .Meet for a drink ,have a laugh ,and see how it goes eh ??
Not sure why you are putting [] in there. They are actually only used to separate another though if you've already used (). Again, lose the commas!  Good use of the comma though in the meet for a drink, have a laugh, and see how it goes. Except, lose the spaces.
__________
To be honest, I wonder if your picture actually works to your advantage. Because people are going to look at that and actually open your profile to see what the picture is. So I actually suggest leaving the main pic, just include some better shots for your others.
I like the jokes that are thrown in there, btw. Does show that you have a great sense of humor.
What else do you enjoy doing? Reading? Watching tv? Working out? Try to expand on some of those interests. And expand on the ones you already have. What kind of music do you enjoy? Give me something that would make me want to mail you with. Right now, the only thing that I know about you basically is that you enjoy drinking. Well, that is a good start, lots of conversation about that. But what about anything else?
You have a good start. And I think should you tinker with it, you can make an amazing profile. You have a great sense of humor and lots of people will enjoy that. Let me know if you need any further help. | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 7:40:06 AM | Thanks alot!! you made some really good points and i will be working them in quickly! I am very glad that i took the time to ask for your help! I do play around with writing but would not say that i am very good at it | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 8:07:42 AM | @bishop
You're a better writer than you give yourself credit for. I was able to tell that you write simply from your profile alone. And just so you know, there is a poetry board and a short story board as well if you wish to share your works with us. | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 8:14:33 AM | @classact
Your profile certainly lives up to your username, doesn't it? It's a very refreshing change. You know what you want and who you want.
Only thing that I personally would change would be your restrictions. You may be missing out on the love of your life because he just can't contact you. Personally, I leave mine totally unrestricted, but I do have my personal restrictions. For example, I have no use for someone who does drugs on a regular basis. However, someone may put that they use drugs, but only do it on occasion. Too many restrictions will cause you to not get so many emails.
But other than that, it was a great profile. Some people will suggest that you should have some other photos, ones that have full body shots. I say some people because personally I don't care, but I know that others will. They will want to see the full view. | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 8:27:38 AM | cheers shaunamarie.Will defo put more effort into changing my badddddddddd profile.You are right about me typing as i speak,need to change that  .Think i could do with a spell checker here eh ? .cheers again.Can i get back to you when iv changed it ??. | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 9:17:07 AM | | Not had lot of time,changed it a little.Please give me some more help here hunni,really need it.Cheers again.You really are a nice lady.Happy :fishing. | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 10:59:00 AM | I've been reading your critiques and now I feel I am ready for a review of my profile if you please.  Thank you for any suggestions! | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 1:48:50 PM | Hiy, could you do a review for me pls? suggestions also more than welcome and pointers in the right direction with regards to pics as well pls x
Thank you x
Sus x | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 2:04:51 PM | There is no such thing as a bad profile! Sometimes these things can be hard to write. Mine has had about probably at least 10 major changes.
Great changes. I know they can be difficult to make, especially if you're used to writing as you speak. And no, I don't think you necessarily need a spell checker either. Believe me, I'm probably the most guilty of typing as I speak. That's why it's always good to get an outsider's view. Just personally I wouldn't have contacted you before because there was so much shorthand in there that I just didn't have a clue. Now I know a little more about you and I haven't spent 20 minutes trying to figure your profile out.
I'm not sure you are getting the interests quite right. Try this format: countryside, music, pubs, humor, or whatever.
And then in the about me expand on them.
It's not so much the way you have the interests, but it's the way that they are automatically defaulted that will make it hard to read. For example, if you read mine, that's not the order I put them in. But it will automatically change them. So it's kind of a big mess. Best to leave them as a single word and then in about me, expand there.
And remember to put commas between your interests so that they come up in blue.
You are doing a good job though. I know it can be difficult to write, but at the same time, it's not that difficult to write. You want to know something funny? After reading your profile I knew you were from Scotland, but I didn't read that part of the profile. It just comes out and screams at me. So even be careful when taking my advice. A good rule of thumb is to read profiles in your area to see how others write them. I'm from Canada so obviously the way we write profiles is going to be different. | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 2:21:35 PM | @bigal
Now, your profile is a perfect example of a perfect profile. You tell everything, but not too much. You've sold yourself, but you've kept the special things to be bought. You've told me everything I could possibly need to know. I feel like I know you. You make me feel that you're approachable. Not that I would ever complain about someone's pictures, but you even manage to get some clear photos with a full body shot.
I think that there must be no good women in Vermont.  | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 2:31:49 PM | @sus
I'd hide the two pictures that uhm...are more revealing. Your profile talks about things that you enjoy and not once do you mention sex. Someone who wants only sex will contact you based on those photos, and others who actually want you for your mind will not contact you because you sort of give the impression that you're into showing your body off. (If you get my drift.)
I rather enjoyed reading your profile. You talk about things that interest you. What kinds of things do you want in a relationship?
As always, I'd suggest knocking down your restrictions. You can always ignore those who don't fit your own personal criteria. But someone may be honest that they do do drugs, but maybe once a year. But someone who has done drugs may not be able to contact you, but having only done it once won't bother you. (I didn't read your restrictions, btw, just using that as an example.)
It's a great profile though. You give us an idea of who you are. And that I think is always a good starting point. | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 2:54:31 PM | Thank you, I`ve had a bit of a play,, could you take another peek for me pls x And thank you x
Sus x | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 3:49:47 PM | Your profile is great, I really like the improvements. 
I'm going to give you my honest opinion about the bikini picture. It looks like you're about to engage in a private activity (if you get my drift, from where the hands are situated.) Nothing wrong with the picture, but from your profile, it's going to attract the wrong kind of people for you. Guys WILL NOT READ YOUR PROFILE if they want sex. They will simply see the picture. It's best to leave the two pictures that show just you and save the others for those you want to be naughty with.  | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 4:41:48 PM | Lol Should I confess i`m actually holding the belly up lol
I was trying to do the full body shot, hehe and thought at least that way they would know what it really looked like
But thank you once again x
Sus x | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 5:03:36 PM | | Ah, yes, the hiding of the belly. I can tell you that that's not the first thought that went through my mind though. There are several men who are sorry that that picture is no longer there. | |
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Posted: 7/9/2006 5:38:25 PM |  Never mind,,,,,  I shall have to see what tame shots I can do lol
But thank you xx | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 6:00:29 PM | | Again cheers shaunamarie.Will take your advice on board.I will work on it more when iv got time. | |
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| Want an honest review?
Posted: 7/9/2006 6:15:42 PM | @haydendavid
Another example of a perfect profile. Great pictures, even ones showing you in your element. You know what you want. And you know the basic qualities you expect from another person. You're not totally overloading, but there are certain aspects that you expect. No false promises, no self-righteousness, just who you are. And you even show a softer side, that you are shy. I personally dig that. Not shyness, but showing some vulnerability.
@lldivall
I'll be looking for it. Let me know if you have any questions. | |
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