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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/19/2006 6:58:51 PM | I am raising my son who is almost a year old alone financially since day one. My sons father passed away before he knew he was to be a dad.
The closest family member lives atleast two hours away but if I needed them they would be there in less then two hours for sure, and I have a wonderful group of friends who give out small interest free loans in a pinch and are great support and like family.
Can't say it's easy being a single mom, but I don't know any different then what our life has become as the two of us. Since back to work I miss him like crazy but I found community resources to help in daycare and I learned to penny pinch since I was a child so I manage to pay the mortgage and the bills with what I have.
My treasure is the greatest gift I have ever received and am so proud to be his mom. I have learned as a parent to swallow my pride for the sake of my son and ask for help. It's not easy for me but I know I might be single but I will always have help if I ask and allow it.
So really looking at my life I am never alone. Probably what bothers me the most is not having someone to share him with, he's amazing and ofcourse I am biased! | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/19/2006 7:10:44 PM | | Congratulations to you campgurl. You just keep on doing the best you can. I know it's not easy I have been there and done it myself with 3. I am not going to try to tell you that it gets easier as time goes on but I will tell you that raising your child will be the most important and rewarding job that you will ever experience and it will pay you back in more ways than money ever could. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/19/2006 7:35:36 PM | | My oldest is 22, never saw a dime, gift or a hug from his dad till he was 14. Came in trying to be the hero and buy him anything he wanted...little did he realize, all he needed was to give him what is free...love and understanding. I would have taken that, to any dollar amount. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/19/2006 7:57:55 PM | I've had no help from my sons dad in any way shape or form. Hes done nothing but yet seems to think hes done soo much. Wait I know what hes done lots of... cause a shi*load of unnecassary stress. I've been lucky though, my sons has lots of family that love him lots and I"ve had all the support in the world from them!!
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/19/2006 8:03:41 PM | | My daughter is going to be two in Oct. last aug. her "sperm donor" was put in jail for 16 years. I've been doing it on my own since I was pregnant. And now I picked another winner and I am more than likely going to be going through it again in Nov. when I have my son on my own. But I have a wonderful family and great friends that help me get through it. Words or encouragement are very very helpful. But given everything that's gone on I would not change it for the world. I have an intelligent, beautiful daughter who is head over heels for her mommy as her mommy is for her. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me and now she's going to have a brother and she's very excited. It's gonna be hard but you just have to keep your head up and know why you get up and out of bed every morning. I know why I do. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/19/2006 8:51:44 PM | I'm in that same situation. I have my two kiddos and their "mom" hasn't provided a penny for them in over three years.
We're doing fine, though, and we're all better off as things have turned out. Basically, there are two choices in our situation:
1) whine about being a "victim" of circumstances, a deadbeat ex and complain about what has happened in the past OR
2) evaluate where you are, appreciate what you have and build for the future. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/20/2006 6:20:01 PM | I've been on my own since I was 4 months pregnant. Long Long story that would make a great Jerry Springer episode; only thing missing was the pre-operative transexual. No Wait! That would be the "woman" he moved in with! In all seriousness though, it definately was the second coming of the immaculate conception as even with medical intervention to actually conceive - he still claimed it not to be his.. and yes, even with the medical records and the DNA test to shut him up he continues to claim "there's always a chance". Can you see why I'm better off on my own?
We lived 15 minutes away from one another until my son was 18 months old. To make a long story short; eventually the mediator and I gave up catering to him to try to make things as easy and convenient as possible for him to show up for visitation but he just couldn't make that trip. He's never seen him.
I was in Alberta at the time and my nearest relative was in Ontario.
Work moved me to New Brunswick, haven't heard from the ex since - in fact his family, which I would be closer to now while living here has packed up and moved and gone unlisted.. hrmm? At least family is now only a 16 hour drive away... yeesh.
So, no father, no family near, and yes there is an enforcement action in place for monetary support but the only thing i see from that is the amount in arrears accumulating...woo hoo.
You are definately not alone. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/20/2006 6:26:59 PM | | You know my boys and I have done well without her around. I am by no means ****ing here, I just wish more parents would suck it up and be a part of their childrens lives. They are not hurting anyone but the kids, and thats the sad part of it. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/20/2006 8:26:46 PM | | My kids' dad jumps in and out of their life at will. He does currently have health insurance for them but that's because the family coverage is the same price for him, his newest wife and all 5 kids. It's been nearly a month since he's seen them, he does call me occassionally but doesn't ask to talk to them. The longest he was been gone from their lives is 2 weeks short of the 2 years required in this state to terminate his rights so I guess that means he cares somewhat. But, they know who and what he is and they know that I'm always here for them and in the end that is all that really matters. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/20/2006 9:03:07 PM | | I have a seven month old and no help from the dad....he isn't mentioned at all on any papers or anything...kind like he doesn't exist...I only hope it stays that way. I mean I'm sad for my daughter but I don't want him coming and going in and out of her life either and if he wants out I would rather he just stay out. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/20/2006 9:50:02 PM | I have been taking care of my kids on my own for almost 7 years.
We have come a long way and things are just getting better. I would like my kids to interact with a male figure, so be it BF or male friends. They are older now, 14, 16 & 20 all girls. They say they don't need a father but I feel they still need the male figure in their lives. Or maybe help when I have to chase the guys away...LOL | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/21/2006 4:28:30 AM | My ex husband is a deadbeat-his theory on paying child support...I'll use the money-let's see...yeah...for food...extra curricular...for medical...but he didn't see that.
My youngest son-again-no support emotional or otherwise-and he wouldn't be any emotional anyways-just make things harder.
IMO-and I know alot will disagree...raising these boys on my own-WITH OUTSIDE COMMUNITY SUPPORT has made them much healthier emotionally then having their father around ever would have. | |
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| How many sinle parents have their kid or kids with no help?
Posted: 7/21/2006 9:09:15 AM | What is the point to this thread? To remind anyone single and doing it on their own that someone else has it worse than you?
Or is it so they can see they aren't the only ones in such a predicament? HA.. like they don't know that already!!!
No offence but I'd rather NOT discuss the whole my pity party is worse than yours and here's why to the world.
In the end.. it doesn't matter. | |
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