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 original girl next door
Joined: 10/11/2005
Msg: 1
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?Page 1 of 1    
There seems to be several different idea about the terms seeing someone vs dating someone. So here I am asking for some male insight. Do you have any ideas as to the terminology? Thanks for the clarification.
 DentedKnight
Joined: 7/7/2005
Msg: 2
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 7:01:07 AM
This one you may get a bunch of different answers on, but here's my take.

While dating might mean anything from a first meeting to being exclusive (your girlfriend/boyfriend) it is usually meant as the beginning of the process. Seeing someone, as in "I've been seeing someone for a while now" could cover the same ground, but usually means the end of the process, as in boyfriend/girlfriend, or you would like them to be.

Hence the phrase "Are you seeing someone?" doesn't usually mean have you been on a date, but means someone you have been on several dates with and perhaps might be getting serious about.
 Formerly known as ece7405
Joined: 3/13/2006
Msg: 3
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:02:05 AM
I don't think there is a clear-cut answer as everyone will interpret the terms differently. For the most part they are probably interchangeable. I do get the sense that dating is a step up from seeing someone.

If you say you are seeing someone there could be uncertainty about how you feel about the person -- you are still getting to know them.

If you say you are dating, you definitely like the person but haven't decided on the sustainability of the relationship.

To take it a step further, people will also say dating exclusively. You are pretty sure at this point that you can sustain a relationship but don't are not ready to commit to girl/boyfriend labels.


It's like going to the beach...

You walk up to the water, stick your toe in to feel the water. You take a couple of more steps until the water comes to your knees. (seeing each other)

You reach down and splash water over your body as you take a few more steps deeper in. (dating)

Finally, you submerse yourself, moving slowly as you try to adjust to the water temperature. You are still cold and consider turning back and getting your towel. (dating exclusively)

Your body adjusts to the cooler temperature of the water which now feels comfortable , allowing you to swim freely. (girl/boyfriend)
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 4
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History
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:13:58 AM
^^ great analogy, especially since everyone seems to like them "long walks on the beach".
 MotleyGrrl
Joined: 7/8/2006
Msg: 5
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 12:36:35 PM
i think there's a difference.
i had dating as my status here for awhile because that's what i am currently doing: dating! i'm not sleeping with anyone or making commitments, i am hanging out, having fun, and stealing kisses here and there.

99% of the men that emailed me had a problem with that status because it seems most people equate dating with being in a relationship/"seeing someone". well... it's not!!!

i am actively dating. that means meeting new people and going out. it's so frustrating that people can't get it! ahhhh! i did change my status just because i am tired of explaining myself.
 NefariusX
Joined: 6/6/2005
Msg: 6
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 1:48:19 PM
Ya know if you were to Take the word "Date" for its actual definition we wouldn't be pondering it. I regard a "Date' as a pre determined situation or moment. Picking up someone in a bar is a Pick up not a date......Meeting someone for coffee is a Date....it was "pre arranged" I'm seeing someone means rejection for you becuz I have been making pre arranged "dates" with some one on a regular basis. Shall I continue?......I'll call you at 8pm Motlygrl....thats a phone "date" its a commitment to a Moment not a life. I use dating on my profile for what it is, to make "Appointments" to spend time with various people. so to sum what we have learned.......dating = schedule to meet........Seeing someone = Exclusive to one at the moment. Now if you'll excuse me I have make a date with my right hand even though I'm seeing My left at the moment. These are just my opinions but what do I know.
 original girl next door
Joined: 10/11/2005
Msg: 7
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 3:46:29 PM
Great idea's about the whole situation. Clearity is better lol lol. JUst found far to many people have far too many differences of opinions but I have a better idea of the general concenus!!

Thanks GUYS!

 matt46107
Joined: 5/6/2006
Msg: 8
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 7:14:06 PM
I would say "dating" implies an exclusive relationship amd "seeing someone" is more casual.
Of course that's just my opinion...I could be wrong.
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 7:21:52 PM
^^^^^^^^^ I agree, that has always been my take on it. But what the heck do I know?
 ag935
Joined: 12/28/2005
Msg: 10
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 7:54:32 PM
I would like to take the question one step further. If you are "dating" someone (using the definition of a planned meeting), at what point are you expected to not be dating other people? I am referring generally to older people thirties and up as the rules seem to be different now than in college.
 FitnessBunny
Joined: 6/27/2006
Msg: 11
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/24/2006 8:14:25 PM
Hard to say, really I think they are about the same. Your best bet is to ask the person you are seeing/dating on what they think that means.
 rnstun3angels
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 12
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/25/2006 3:21:58 PM
if you come up with this answer please share, that seems to be my problem. If you are with someone every weekend and several times during the week talk everyday...etc. Is it wrong to think it should be exclusive...
 lavender candle
Joined: 12/23/2005
Msg: 13
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Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/25/2006 3:24:20 PM
I think this whole subject of dating has been corrupted, changed, and completly re-written over the past few years. Hello people!!!! DATING= to go out with a man or a woman to see if there is a chance for a future relationship., otherwise, you are just going to dinner with a FRIEND. Come on. what the heck has happened here? Dating is dating. same as seeing someone. If people think nowadays that DATING is just to go out and have some laughs, then what the heck is that? that is an activity partner with the chance of an intimate encounter or two?? Isn't it? Dating is and always has been two people who want to see if there is a possiblility of a realationship down the road. Now we are reduced to having dinner and stealing kisses with no intentions what so ever? This makes me sad. I long for the good old days when a man asked a woman out to get to know her because he had romantic intentions.
 rainbowgurl03
Joined: 7/9/2006
Msg: 14
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/25/2006 10:03:16 PM
Gosh...wot do I say.....only that was one of my problems. But to add to it.....someone said to me (about a bloke I was seeing/datin), has he asked you out yet? CONFUSION????????
Asking out??? thats wot happened when I was at school!!! Personally I came to the conclusion that its an age thing....it depends on how old you are. It certainly confused me and sadly through this confusion i did a few mad things on impulse with this bloke because I did not know???

Yeah that is good advice ask the person your involved with. I wish I did instead of doing wot I did :(
Oh well, none of us are perfect and we all make mistakes. Hopefully we learn from them!!
 8point75
Joined: 4/3/2006
Msg: 15
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/25/2006 10:08:18 PM
trade secret...

if a guy is only interested in "seeing" someone and not "dating" that person...its kinda like him keeping his options open for a better offer...
 Jon62
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 16
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/28/2006 2:47:38 PM
Heres my two cents and please don't ask for change

Dating: I would consider seeing someone the first 3 to 5 times as dating. This usually allows both parties involved time to find out if there's chemistry, compatibly, etc.. For those of you who have already knocked boots in the first 3 dates please move on to seeing someone. Of course, that is contingent if you're still calling

Seeing Someone: Phase 2. After dating a few times the two parties involved are obvioulsy enamored with each other and continue to go out but may have not yet decided to see each other exclusively. This may be the phase where going at it like rabbits describes a lot of relationships. Now if you make it through this phase then Captain Kirk may ask Scotty for warp drive and before you know it, you're in

Exclusivity Mode: Ah, Love is in the air and an agreement binded by lawyers for both parties have agreed to only see each other. Gifts are given and a daily barrage of compliments are aimed right towards your main vessel; your heart. The train ride is smooth and if all goes well then it looks like the next stop is

Engagementville: The bended knee, the question is popped, you're so giddy but you stop crying long enough to say Yes Yes. You set a date, make plans, and get lost in each others eyes on a daily basis. Everythings in bloom, you can't stop smiling and finally the time has come and before you know it, BAM, it's

MarriageMania: (please insert your own comments here. I'm assuming if you're commenting you're no longer married)

That's my two cents worth. Has anyone seen my wallet? The person who posted only hopes for a few chuckles. Any similarities to real people or events is purely coincidental and legal action regarding such claims will be fruitless. May the force be with you on your search
 Formerly known as ece7405
Joined: 3/13/2006
Msg: 17
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 7/28/2006 2:59:50 PM

I don't think there is a clear-cut answer as everyone will interpret the terms differently. For the most part they are probably interchangeable. I do get the sense that dating is a step up from seeing someone.

If you say you are seeing someone there could be uncertainty about how you feel about the person -- you are still getting to know them.

If you say you are dating, you definitely like the person but haven't decided on the sustainability of the relationship.


That is what I said a few days ago. But...

"Sorry, I can't go on a date with you I'm already seeing someone."

So maybe dating is not a step up. If you really want to know the difference, ask whoever is using the term. Either way "dating" and "seeing", both seem non-commital so I wouldn't take it too seriously.
 Seductionxoxo
Joined: 3/7/2006
Msg: 18
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 10/1/2007 3:48:44 AM
Evolution of Coupledome

1. There has to be some sort of meeting. If you have never met before its casually called a "meeting" or first date( I prefer meeting, to me date means there is an initial attraction), if you have met before and your already on to the next step...
2. A date! This means you have met already and are interested, and want to see if there is good communication and interaction... This can go a couple differnt ways, we can go on multiple dates, cramming as much fun-loving activities as you can in one 6 hour night, or it can be more modest and involve in a hug or peck goodbye, or a simple exchange of phone numbers (Assuming you don't already have them). If the date went well, you may discuss a future meeting, and make plans.
3. Dating. (Now dating seems plural to me, meaning more than 2 dates) You have done the dinner and movie, maybe done a mini-golf or wine testing. He obviously has held the door open for you, and complimented on how wonderful you look or this would have ended at "date". People can be stuck in this "dating" phase for a while, until future conversation takes place.
4. Exclusive dating. (This can happen only, and I mean only after a mutual agreement conversation!) This means, you are still going out on dates and outings(maybe a few innings) but you are no longer going on dates with other people.
5. Seeing Eachother. This may not need a conversation to back it up. After a while of exclusive dating, its just easier to say "I am seeing him."... rather than "I am exclusivly dating him." This may involve sleep-overs, meeting of friends, couple-outings, meeting of family in some cases spare keys...all sorts of other seemingly awkward events to test your (I hate to say it) "relationship-potential".
6. Couple-dome. This usually happens when others are describing you. The first few times you hear it may be awkward, make your heart race, make his blood pressure skyrocket... This also includes "couple" activites, usually with other couples. Double dates, Couple Dinners, Outings, etc. These are the events we have all attended single and wish we had a rock to climb back under. This is the longest and most important phase of any relationship. It may include vacations, moving of furniture, mutual bank accounts(in some bizzar situations!), "I love yous", obviously we have met the family and friends, maybe a dog to test parental ability...conversations of the future...which leads us right into the next phase...
7. Engagement!! This happens when the man buys a really, really expensive ring! Haha, or just makes his best effort to make a unique presentation declairing his ever-dying passionate love to you stating 164 of the top reasons why he wants to spend the rest of his life with you...and the visual stimuli of something shiny usually encourages a woman to say 'yes'! Engagement varies from person to person, sometimes weeks, others months, some years... This is the stage where we re-live the honeymoon stage... maybe it involves moving in together if not already done, finding out all those odd quirks of the person your about to commit your life to.(Toilet seats left up, dishes on the counter, tampon boxes, shedding hair in the drain, maybe a sex swing under the bed from a previous relationship...ahhh).
8. Cold feet. This is seriously a catogoire of couple-dome. It encompass' so many differnt entities it is entitled to its own grouping. At this time all those little things from living with the person start to make them look, maybe not as attractive as you thought. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with that man who; spends more time manicuring his nails and plucking his brows than you? Or the woman who spends her hard earned paychecks on shopping extravaganzas and expect you to fork the dinner bills? Or what if you never noticed that large mole lower back, with the hair growing out of it...or that her 2nd toe is larger than her 1st!? All jokes aside, this is the nit-picking stage that can make or break...expecially the leading weeks up to the ....
9. Marriage. Yay, your married...now what? Well, I hope you got alot of sex during your engagement and prior...'cus you sure aint getting it now! It's very important now to keep maintained, and not cancel your 'waxing' appointments, or cancel your gym membership as you are 'married' now... it's still an obligation to look good (honestly to be healthy!). It is the best way to maintain a positive body image and not let yourself slip. This will lead to...
10. Cheating. Okay, now I know what your all thinking. How is cheating granted a spot on the "evolution of coupledome ladder?" There can be several types depending on who we are talking with. Some thing cheating is only physical touching, others can be emotional flirting, some can only relate cheating to sex. Now being as how scientifically speaking humans are not programed to be monogomous...it has be against the grain to remain 100% commited to your mate. You are bound to have simularities and differnces as you would with any other person. Differnt people satisfy differnt portions of your life. It is important to remain calm, and not accusitory in this realm. I think the #1 cause (okay maybe #2) is the fact that many couples drive their mates into cheating...either by "letting themselves go" or by accusing the other persons behaviors. Insecuries in one, may lead the other to be fufilled in the aspects of their relationship their mate is not satisfying. Now hopefully, none of you get to see this stage of a relationship as you will live happily ever after in the marriage stage...however if we do walk in on our wifes banging the pool boy, rest assured with alot of paperwork, a couple grand, and the seperation of assets(arnt you now wishing you signed that pre-nup?) we get to:
11. Divorce. This is the most grueling part of a couple-dome relationship. I'm begginging to wonder if we can just skip marriage and jump right ahead to divorce and not waste any time? This is the part where you realise your company just paid for your wifes affair, her business trips out of province, expensive meals...and there aint a damn thing you can do about it. To make matters worse she brings the pool boy to all the seperation meetings...after all is said and done...you take one of two routes....
12A) Re-Kindle: You still have feelings for your former-flame, and want to meet at a pub to 'discuss things'. You chat about life, the dog, jobs etc...All the passion of the divorce made you all hot and bothered, and you end up sharing a room in the neighbouring motel. You continue to develop into what we call:
13A) Fling...a purely sexual relationship, usually taking base in cheap hotels. These relationships hardly ever turn into anything miraculas, and are a dead end.
12B) Move on---and move on it is...your back to step one, you get to meet the next **** who's going to do the pizza boy on the pool table who's going to take you for half....

Happy Fishing!!

So this post was ment to be a 5 minute long synopsis of what I veiwed relationships to be...it has now been over an hour and I'm wanting to add a bunch of other missed stages in a relationship...but for now..we'll leave it at that!!
AK
 Xidra
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 19
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 10/1/2007 8:13:04 AM
dating means you are genuinely interested in someone and want to continue doing things together.

seeing someone is a cop out lame excuse for "I want to sleep with other people too but not have the label of a cheater"

Hope that clears it up for ya
 jeunerab
Joined: 11/24/2006
Msg: 20
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History
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 10/1/2007 8:41:45 AM
I'm in agreement with Makes My Knees Weak. "Dating" is the same as "Seeing Someone". Yes, there may be differences in shades of meaning between the two, but what those meanings are can differ greatly from person to person. I would suggest there is little benefit trying to examine those differences down to the "gnat guano" level.

I personally think that the most important distinction is the use of the term "exclusively". If you're simply dating someone or seeing someone, there is no expressed commitment not to "date" or "see" someone else - whatever the individual believes is appropriate behavior for a "date" or a "see". If you're dating or seeing someone exclusively, that means you have agreed to date or see only each other. So, the following conversation commicates all that needs to be said:

He: Are you seeing anyone?
She: Yeah.
He: Is it exclusive?

She: Yes. (smiles)
He: Pity... for me. Have a great day! (smiles)

...or...

She: no... (smiles)
He: Well, I'd love the chance to yak with you for a while. How would you feel about sharing a cup of coffee with me? (really big smile)

Really, what other information can you reliably expect to glean from the terms "dating" and "seeing"? Two people are spending time together, and they've either made a commitment of some kind or duration not to see anyone else at the same time, or they haven't.

For what it's worth, I also believe that if a person has requirments (for exclusivity - or anything else) before taking the next step emotionally or physically, it's that person's responsibility to make sure those requirements are in place before taking that step, no matter what that step may be. The way to find out whether your requirements are met is to ask outright, and probably not to start a nebulous conversation that begins with something like "Hon, are we dating, or just seeing each other?"
 SassySandra
Joined: 11/14/2006
Msg: 21
Is there a difference between dating vs seeing someone...if so, what is it?
Posted: 11/6/2007 3:37:39 PM
What if its a long distance online relationship where you speak online/telephone/text and meet up about once every couple of months? Tell each other you love each other etc and introduce to family
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