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 jenelda1
Joined: 7/11/2006
Msg: 1
What are step-kids called after you divorce?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I have a hard time explaining that my kid has a brother and sister, but they aren't my dids. They aren't my ex-stepkids, cuz we're still in contact, but how should I refer to them???
 KentuckyWoman13
Joined: 6/30/2006
Msg: 2
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:14:21 PM

how should I refer to them???


By their names...as in, "Greg, Bobby and Peter Brady".
 caericjay
Joined: 7/14/2006
Msg: 3
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:25:10 PM
I call mine GONE forever......you have no rights as a step parent and its the most thankless job in the world.
 jenelda1
Joined: 7/11/2006
Msg: 4
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:28:21 PM
I'm not saying anything about parental rights or anything, (which you are right---it can be pretty thankless!) But is there a better way to explain thier relationship to my daughter is what I'm asking.
 Greeneyezz
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 5
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:32:00 PM

its the most thankless job in the world.


LOL

Bitter much!?
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 6
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What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:36:08 PM
My step-father still calls me his daughter. And he's still my Dad.
 Rhonda Kiss
Joined: 5/21/2006
Msg: 7
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What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:40:32 PM
I still call my step children my kids cause I raised them, someday they will see it. I love them as my own.

Rhonda
 wwwwwhatever
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 8
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:41:44 PM
I'd say it depends on how you felt about them before the divorce, lol...
 Queen_Mab
Joined: 6/21/2006
Msg: 9
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 9:44:10 PM
My second husband had sole custody of his daughter when we got together. She was and is my bonus daughter, she is my son's little sister (no step involved), she still introduces me as "this is my other mother" even after the divorce, and she is still my bonus kid.
 lilquietgal
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 10
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 10:10:20 PM
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Message: I'm not saying anything about parental rights or anything, (which you are right---it can be pretty thankless!) But is there a better way to explain thier relationship to my daughter is what I'm asking.

Friends is my opinion and let them decide whether they want to contact or not.
 Witchypoo
Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 11
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 10:38:27 PM
After my father passed on, my step-mom remarried, I called my step mom's new husband my step dad and well my step mom remained the same. My daughter refers to them as gramma and grampa.

Why don't you just continue to call them your step children. Or better yet.... your step children from a former marriage to (fill in name here).

:))
Witchy
 Kimmiecat
Joined: 4/23/2006
Msg: 12
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/26/2006 11:52:00 PM
Yeah Raek! I will always refer to my step-son as my son without regard to my relationship with his father. I raised him as a son, I love him as a son, so he is my son.
 Aussie Wanderer
Joined: 5/24/2006
Msg: 13
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/27/2006 2:35:02 AM
Kimmiecat couldn't agree more. Raised my ex-husbands daughter for 7 years and even though she has chosen to not have contact I still call her my step-daughter and talk of her as an integral part of my life. By the way she doesn't have too much contact with her birth families.
For me it depends on the age of your child/ren as to how you explain the relationship, if you still have contact with the children and they are still in your life why not just sit down with them all and ask them. This way they can let you know how they see the relationship between each other. Just make sure it is all done with :hug

And as with kids, honesty is always the best policy cos can those lil tigers catch you out if you ain't
 Xtype
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 14
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/27/2006 3:00:33 AM
Simply not your kids anymore with no legal or social rights to see them whatsoever...unfortunately.
 AREALANGEL
Joined: 2/5/2006
Msg: 15
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/27/2006 3:09:09 AM
half brother and sister to you child.....and they are step kids any way you look at it..
 Aussie Wanderer
Joined: 5/24/2006
Msg: 16
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/28/2006 3:09:15 AM
Gotta agree, end of day, not yours except for how they fit in your heart, life. Guess it is more about the contact with your child than anything else.
Look after your own little person's heart and follow their lead, they may not even be old enough for you to worry about this.
 livlykuwrdyn
Joined: 7/20/2006
Msg: 17
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 9:38:16 AM
I would still refer to them as my children....I mean if a parent is lost by death, you still refer to them as your parent....if you still have parental rights because you were a huge part in their upbringing, then it only makes sense. Children are bounced around enough from home to home....would be nice if they could count on something stable.
 oat meal
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 18
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:04:40 AM
Call the girls flotsam and the boys jetsam.
 salamander000
Joined: 10/26/2004
Msg: 19
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What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:12:07 AM
I just told him to tell his friends 'my stepmother is an alien" I call him by his name, which is the preferred rule of thumb
 Dime12804
Joined: 9/1/2005
Msg: 20
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What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:13:31 AM
This is why there should never be a "step" anything. Make no mistakes and you don't have this confusion later on.

With blended families becoming more and more common, I think people should just accept the differences for what they are and stop trying to make a family out of something that is not family. One can care for a kid or a new partner to their parents without adopting them as family. I know it's easier said than done, but is it really worth the trouble down the road???

I have two siblings from my fathers second marriage because they were adopted by him. Their father was absent in their lives. They are still my brother and sister and will remain that way forever. However, their mother is not my mother and my mothers husband is not my father. There is no "step" anything in our families.

When I get involved with a new partner, I will not allow my children to call her their mother or step mother. If she has kids, they will not be their step siblings. They will remain who they are. New additions to the family, but as individuals.

It is what it is folks. Family is not what it used to be and it sucks, but you still cannot make a family out of something that is not family. Especially given the fact that not even a second family is guaranteed to last forever.
 athletic_funny3
Joined: 5/31/2006
Msg: 21
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:13:37 AM
Stepped-on kids.
 cynderalla
Joined: 1/10/2006
Msg: 22
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:21:44 AM
Msg# 14 "Simply not your kids anymore with no legal or social rights to see them whatsoever...unfortunately"


Whats unfortunate is peoples thinking...
Its like disposable kids...Not
Social rights...It takes a community to raise a child/ren.
Kids love parents, stepparent and all involved in their lives...

My 2 cents be apart of their lives if allowed, as a stepparent or just as a friend.
 Coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 23
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What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:24:21 AM
You can still call them stepkids..............

I still refer to my dad's second wife as my step mom.... but the 3rd was just a step monster!

How do you want them to refer to your child and to you?
 Dime12804
Joined: 9/1/2005
Msg: 24
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What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:34:02 AM

How do you want them to refer to your child and to you?


Hi. I'm Tony. I'll always be Tony. I'll be your guardian when needed and I'll care for you as I do any other child. I'll help you along and teach you the same things I teach my kids. I do not aim to replace your father and I'd like to be your friend. I am an adult and I expect respect, but I promise to always return the same and to always yield to your mother and your father, for that is what is best for you.
 malibu65
Joined: 7/2/2006
Msg: 25
What are step-kids called after you divorce?
Posted: 7/29/2006 10:35:20 AM
well first off unless you gave birth to them then they are not your kids....you also should not tell you child that he has a brother/sister because in all reality he doesn't...how old is your child that you need to explain this to him/her? and why do you need to explain it...also since they are not your children you just refer to them as your friends/by there names,unless they call you mom!!!. were you married to someone that had children already and then you had your child?? these are all questions that need to be answered before you can truly make an assesment...and I have to stress I hate the term STEP_CHILDREN...unless you used them to walk all over then they are not STEPS!!!
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