| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 6:04:28 AM | ....nope it was not a date....
I saw her in line at the movie theater.
Thing was...y ou know how we have redundant posts here all the time, about people (mostly men) who complained about how some woman didn't reply to their email/message....
Well, what would you do if you were in a situation, where you saw this very woman in public, and had the opportunity to say hello?
I mean, you can give her the benefit of the doubt, and think, "Well, she probably didn't have time, or didn't see it in all the emails that she gets slammed with"
Would catching her out in public like that be putting her in an uncomfortable position? Would she welcome you saying, "Hey, you look familiar, do you have a POF ad online?"
Being how my theory is this, a woman that ignores you online, might not ignore you in person....because the 'face to face" is seomthing different.
I saw a post like that meeting in real life vs. meeting in person, that a woman who would normally ignore a shorter man online....might not do the same if the same man approached her in person.
OR, since she ignored your email....dont even bother, you might be considered a stalker? | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 6:12:47 AM | | I dont know.....depends on what you have talked about, what kind of online relationship you have had....maybe she was having a hard time and decided not to talk to anyone......I know if I was talking to someone here and just did not return emails does not necessarily mean I dont like that person.....I could be busy, maybe not thinking it would work out,,,lots of reasons for me to seem like I am ignoring a male....but if I were approached by a man whom I was talking to and the conversations were decent I would probably be flattered that he noticed me......like I said depends on the situation......Just my 2 cents worth.... | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 7:03:18 AM | | Well I went to a local car dealer and the finance manager looked familiar, turns out he is on here. He looked totally different from his picture online. anyway turns out he had emailed me and I turned him down. We joked about me shutting him down (LOL) but it was kind of awkward. Honestly his picture was not flattering and the profile not so great, so I turned him down....If that makes me shallow I guess I am. But he was actually a pretty nice looking, funny guy in person. You never know until you meet someone in person. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 7:15:13 AM | I would never presume to approach her, particularly if she hasn't responded to your emails...there's a reason why. Some people get right uptight when someone says...Gee I know you from POF....and that's why many don't have pictures that reveal their face...well, maybe they do, but will only show them to people who they've decided to meet with or whatever.
Privacy is a very tentative thing... everyones is different. I think I've recognized some people off of this site while out in public, but I've never said anything to them. I may smile at them, but never would I presume that they want my attention, particularly if my email was ignored... to me, that means they are not interested in a face to face meeting, and yeah, I'd find it stalkerish if a man did that to me. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 8:21:33 AM | | I would think that if she didn't respond to your email then she isn't interested in you and approaching her in public would be wrong. First off, you don't have a profile pic up, that could be the reason she didn't respond. Then again, it could just be that your mail and/or profile did nothing for her. Leave it alone. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 8:53:34 AM |
areyoumine?....,
But he was actually a pretty nice looking, funny guy in person. You never know until you meet someone in person.
I was thinking this myself, and that is why I will go on at least a first date with someone just to see what they are really like.
Bill | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 9:31:52 AM | Saw some from dating sites at the grocery store
and other places around town that I recognized
from dating site pics.
Most made my eyes almost bleed as to how very unattractive they were......
( do they alter the pics to make themselves look younger,
thinner and nicer looking ???? )
excpet one who was a fireman... who was a handsome man
but apparently didnt photograph well. I would have met him
but he had a bad attitude and very jaded from his online dating profile...
so it didnt much matter how he looked after all. He contacted me when I was on a pay
site about 12 times. I just didnt want to meet him fromn the wording on his profile.
I'm glad i didnt despite the fact he was actually attractive, which is
step one and without that there is no way I'm even going to talk to them.
( I cant go there where there is no physical chemistry)
I wouldnt push it OP when you see someone in real life
that you recognize from a dating site. You could be arrested for stalking...
as if they wanted to meet you,
they would have gotten in touch ONLINE.
I dont think its a good idea for women to post too many pics online for this
reason.. a safety reason.... they can always send them private in email and not SHOW THEM TO THE WORLD... as there are stalkers and other sickos out there...
who are home repair guys, contractors and even work in your doctors office.
If some guy walked up to me and said he recognized me from a dating site
I wouldnt like it... more so if I was alone and I might feel he is stalking me. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 9:50:26 AM |
Most made my eyes almost bleed as to how very unattractive they were......
( do they alter the pics to make themselves look younger,
thinner and nicer looking ???? )
Aahahahaa, I shouldn't laugh but I am. This has happened to me before, but with someone from a different 'dating' site! In fact, I see a certain guy everytime I go to the supermarket. Don't get me wrong, I'm no Marilyn Monroe, but this guy is pure freaky. Not so much deformed or anything, but he REALLY creeps me out. So naturally, I steer clear in case I'm recognised. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:08:33 AM | I may say approach her in person in a circumstance like that...but I personally wouldnt say anything about an online dating site or having written her a note or something....just say hi to her...perhaps ask her for coffee or something see what may happen in person.
If you have the courage to do it...go for it. She may never recognize you from pof anyways! | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:08:33 AM | Who says you need to mention POF at all? At the moment you have the advantage of recognizing the person, knowing at least a little about them from their profile, why not just approach them politely under the pretense of a complete stranger? (after all, you actually are despite whatever online chat you've had) 
If you're that interested in her I would simply strike up conversation as you would have done were you seeing her for the first time... People seem to forget what life was like before online dating - you see someone attractive that you find yourself interested in, you ask them out, plain and simple 
If she shoots you down, at least you have your answer (and she might not even recognize you from POF). Then you can move on to the next little fishy that catches your eye, be it online or offline  | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:26:38 AM | | i saw one in public, a bar, who had recently put me on her fav list.. i went over and talked to her for a while.. it was sort of like "aren't you so and so from pof".. neither of us were uncomfortable and it was nice to see that some people are exactly who they seem to be online as real life | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:28:22 AM | People recognize me all the time. No one ever speaks to me in person though....they just send email telling me where they saw me.
I would rather they just walked up and said "Hi. I'm a Fish, too" | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:56:10 AM | "I may say approach her in person in a circumstance like that...but I personally wouldnt say anything about an online dating site or having written her a note or something....just say hi to her...perhaps ask her for coffee or something see what may happen in person.
If you have the courage to do it...go for it. She may never recognize you from pof anyways!"
Well, thing is, women...at least in my area.....aren't too crazy about being approached by a stranger....if I had a REASON (seeing her profile) as an Icebreaker, then it wouldn't seem as creepy? | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:57:37 AM | This is a funny topic. I suppose there are different ways to look at it. Everyone here has their own views and I cannot disagree with either of them.
Personally, I do not attempt to strike up a conversation with the ones I see out in public. I suppose if it were at a bar or something and she chose to sit close to me and the bar was nearly empty, I might make small talk, but no more than I would with anyone else.
I have seen a few women in public and it's funny how I've spotted them and then just watched to see if they spot me. When they do, I've always gotten the double look thing and then the deer in the headlights stare. LMAO. I just wave or nod and go about my business.
I think, if they wanted to talk in these situations, they'll make the effort. I'm not about to hang myself out for a stalking accusation, whether the police are involved or not. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 10:58:24 AM | "I would think that if she didn't respond to your email then she isn't interested in you and approaching her in public would be wrong. First off, you don't have a profile pic up, that could be the reason she didn't respond. Then again, it could just be that your mail and/or profile did nothing for her. Leave it alone."
It was on another site...where I had a picture up. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/16/2006 11:18:40 AM | | i guess one thing i would add is that i wouldn't mention an online dating site if they had friends around as some people are quite self conscience or embarassed about people knowing they are on a dating site... here in calgary i went to a pof function at a pub and there was a line-up to get in with pof and non pof people standing there.. the non pof-ers were saying "i heard there was an online singles thing here "and some were making derogatory remarks about that .. some pof-ers were pretending not to be going and others admitted they were going.. some of the conversation was hilarious.. but bottom line is i wouldn't want to embarass someone | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/17/2006 8:47:24 PM | | Again, it all depends on the conversations, how much you talked to her, and what kind of response you did have.....You dont even have to say that you knew her from POF.....find a reason to approach her, if it is positive then good. If not you are no worse for wear....But it would have to depend on the circumstances and what kind of response you had from contacting her on POF.... | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/17/2006 8:52:10 PM |
Would catching her out in public like that be putting her in an uncomfortable position?
Can't speak for everyone else, but it would make me feel uncomfortable, hence why I don't publicly display a face shot. If it was just myself, it might not bother me, but I certainly don't want something like that happening when I'm out with my daughter. I don't exactly want her being involved in my personal life until there's a stable relationship happening. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/17/2006 8:58:35 PM | | if she read deleted my email or unread deleted it then no i would not approach since shes already made her decision. If however she read it but had not replied as of yet and didnt delete it then yeah i might introduce myself. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/17/2006 9:04:14 PM | Your question sounds hopeful....maybe, just maybe she will see me in a different light in real life and accept my advance....
I say don't do it that way. She has turned you down so don't get your hopes up. The only way you should approach someone like that is if she is not in the earsight of any of her friends or other people and you casually say something like: "Hi, you might not even recognize me and I do not by any means want to make you uncomfortable but I wrote you on POF and you turned me down but nevertheless I wanted to say hello, I hope you enjoy the movie and have a great night." Hesitate for her reaction and then smile and walk away. | |
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| Saw them online...then, saw them in public.....
Posted: 8/17/2006 9:29:26 PM | The man i dated for 19months.. well i had for real met him one year prior at the amusment park.. I had put a notice in the site that i would be attending..
well, i am there listing to Forner the group.. and well my kids left and i sat there all by myself.. at the very end.. a scrony hippy biker looking man walked up too me, and it freeked me out big time. it was the first time reality hit in that even though you talk on here and have your pictures. in plublic in a small town or state others reconize you..
So i sorta said no it was not me.. Well he went home thinking what a betch.. and well i was freeked out.. did not go on the sites for almost 7 months.. again i got lonely and started again..
To have him the 2nd man email me.. though his words and his boyent laughing strong personalty and poems i fell in love.. So 3 days later was my birthday, he invited himself. and i said ok.. it did not take more then 5 mint when i met him, he looked at me, throw his arms around me and just held, me.... I was shocked that for one year all he did was think of me and my pretty smile.. it was the impression i left on him..
Well, buy the end of the weekend, he had met my kids, with in 3 weeks we were fully dating each other, 2months later he moved in. to be with me for 19months.
He was handycaped in a way, with crowns and parkenson, but that did not matter, all that i looked at is the most boyent personality that is sarcastic and keeps me laughing.
He was tall, skinyer then a zipper and well, for me i only saw his beautying it took me a while to get use to him.. but in the end i fell head over heals for him and if i ever loved anyone in my entier life.. it would have been this man..
so when you see a women off the site.. just play it cool, walk up too her gently and say..
Do i know you.. let her think first where she met you.... then state you have such pretty eyes... are you here a lone becous i am... Would you mind if we watch the movie together, i will pay for the popcorn and dirnks.. Some will find this honnerabul...
always take a chance no matter what.. be becareful.. some women like i was.. will becomes very freeked out that some one reconized the.. so it is a win win situation..
you just have to play it as it feels right.. Pastor Jewels. | |
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