| Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 4/22/2004 11:02:43 PM | 1. your old enough for a mid life crisis, yet live with your mom, or have roomates.
2. your comic book collection is more extensive then the library of congress.
3. your feminism views stem from the amount of boyfriends you've had in the last 5 years, versus, how many of your guy friends that have girls 10 years younger and are on thier second wife, instead of a genuine interest in feminism.
4. your emotional baggage needs its own warehouse.
5. the last girl you dated was the homeless lady down the street that felt sorry for you.
6. you have an unusual number of boyfriends or girlfriends that break up with over an answer machine, cause they are moving to iceland.
7. when someone asks you about how many sexual partners you had, you start listing off states and not people.
8. your car has 3 wheels, your bank account can be counted in lose change, Visa owns your soul, your boss moved your desk from your office to the store room so he can have a place to practive putting his new gold club, and you said "ok".
9. the best sex you had in the last year, can from riding the subway, in rushhour traffic, hoping that weird dude that randomly gropes people in crowds is on the same subway you are.
10. you try to psychically make people fall in love with you.
this list is just something for fun.
just alittle joking.
if you wanna add something to the list, please go ahead.
I am always looking for a good laugh or two. | |
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 4/23/2004 7:16:49 AM | 11. You have phone sex lines on speed dial.
12. You are in the library so much that people think you work there.
13. You personally have more gas than your car does.
14. The fact that you have dedicated your life to playing Dungeons and Dragons might be a clue!
15. The last love note you recieved was actually a restraining order. | |
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rjn40
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Joined: 2/15/2004
Msg: 4 | |
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 5/13/2004 8:18:43 PM | 19. Army uses your teeth as standard for shade of green paint
20. You recognize his coffeetable snack bowl is filled w "Kibbles n Bits"
21. There are both genders of clothing in his closet, and he ain't datin' nobody.
22. He needs two recycle bins for the beer cans
23. You see a pile of belts in his closet with the tongues busted (gutboy)
Ok, now for the guys dating ladyz;
24. You see a hairball splotch on the carpet, and she don't have no pet.
25. Find "Lava" soap in her bathroom.
26. Her "curling iron" is just a wire with 2 alligator clips on it. Yeah, Baby!!
27. Her "sexy" lingerie has feet attached.
28. She gives her cat a scrap of dinner she made and he buries it in the sandbox.
29. She invites you to a romantic bath - to answer the phone in case "he" calls.
30. Her panties are stiff and flakey.
31. Her ass is hairyer than yours.
32. She keeps her toothbrush in the blue fluid with her styling comb.
33. You find toothpaste on her toilet brush.
34. You ask where the dishwashing liquid is and she laughs and calls you a sissy.
35. Her family reunion photo was taken in a prison yard.
36. She puts your photo on the blackjack table when she runs out of money.
37. She suggests you put on her panties - again.
38. You notice everytime she talks about your balls she has scissors in her hand.
39. You notice she's stitching something everytime she brings up your bald spot.
40. You buy her a panel TV and she wants it mounted on the bedroom ceiling.
41. After sex you ask if she wants some of your cigarette and she says "No thanks, one drag is enough." (Rodney Rules!)
42. She loves SherbeRt, EXpresso, weekend eXcapes, aXes you if you love her, does her waRshing weekly, and wants to be your valentiMe. | |
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 5/19/2004 11:27:44 AM | 43. When you start liking his/her kids better then them.
44. When your man still plays with tonka trucks in the first yard.(with no kids by himself)
45. When you take laundry out of the dryer and throw it in the floor with dirty cloths.
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 5/19/2004 1:28:16 PM | 46. youl et your ex talk you into a date....
47. your legs havent been shaved for 2 weeks and you tell everyone im pretending its the 1800's
48. you go to the store and buys sweats and not a sexy new top.
49. you think that magenta red hair would look beautuful on you
50. you buy a new pair ofjeanas that are so tight you have an inner tube around your waist and are low rise... and you think thier sexy.
51. So you proceed to buy a half top to go with the above jeans. | |
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 6/10/2004 3:02:16 AM | 52. When you have more cats than friends
53. When the neighborhood kids dear each other to ring your door bell.
54. When your smell makes a garbage man pale.
55. If you live with your parents after the age of 30
56. If geting ready for a date means you have to comb back 3 hairs and clean your one tooth real good.
57. When you cook for your date the meal you ran over the night before.
58. If you have ever dressed a pet.
59. IF you can braid any hair that is not on you head.
60. If you have more gold on your teeth than around a finger.
61. If your idea of a romatic date is any place with a drive threw.
62. When you show up at the door with a bus pass and a half eaten hersheys bar.
63. If you ever ask your date to sit on the handle bars.
64. If you ever take a date to the strip club.
65. If the realy good dates are the ones that hold back your hair when you have had to much to drink.
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 6/10/2004 4:31:06 AM | 66. when you throw your underwear at the wall...and they stick
67. when your having awesome sex with your partner...and you let out a HUGE fart | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 11 | |
| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 6/10/2004 10:42:14 AM | | 70. your a covergirl for national geographic 71. your sitting on a bench feeding pigeons and people hand you a dollar and give you their lunch. 72. you try out for a porn movie and the director hires you to clean the toilets 73 you have to use a mirror to tie your shoelaces 74. you walk into a post office and see your picture on the wall | |
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 6/10/2004 11:20:39 AM | 75. Bed covered with stuffed animals and she is afraid they might be watching what you are doing.
76. She has NAMES for all the stuffed animals
77. He has a $30,000 bass boat, a $35,000 truck and lives in a $1500 trailer
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nacv
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Joined: 2/17/2004
Msg: 13 | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 14 | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 15 | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 17 | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 18 | |
| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 6/18/2004 3:07:07 PM | you have to cut up baby diapers to use for pads...
you think shoulder pads are sexy
you think rubber boots look good with evrything...
that 80's pink polka dot shirt... you found i n the flea store is "killer" on you..
you spend your nights at chapters reading books :"how to get ppl to like you""
you take pix of your video collection to show everyone at work | |
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| Re: Ten Signs You May Not Be a Catch.
Posted: 6/18/2004 3:36:32 PM | You think your LP collection is “Keen”
You sill have a Berry Manilow 8 track.
The women you think are sexy all have a pay sight listed on there pic.
Your car is a pastel color
You have walls painted 50/50 bar orange in your house.
Your mom tells you there is no woman good enough to take her place.
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 21 | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 24 | |
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