| | Idiots among usPage 1 of 1 | Subject: Idiots everywhere......
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD: I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request ! the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road.
The reason: "too many deer were being hit! by cars" and he didn't want them to cross there anymore.
This one was from Kingman, KS.
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IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce."
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
And he was a Kansas City chef.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?
To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?
He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Brimingham, Ala.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with ! an intellectually challenged coworker of mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"
She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
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IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented cheerfully, "this is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word was spoken.
We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-hea! dlights stare.
This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office no less.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
"Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open!"
To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side."
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
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*and they walk among us .. and REPRODUCE | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/5/2006 1:48:25 PM | | I had a bill collector call and ask for my father. I told them he died in 2001. "That's ok, I'll call back later." Same thing happened after my mother died. Idiots! | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/6/2006 12:25:03 AM | I had a customer awhile back that wanted to buy an artificial 5 foot tall ficus tree. She wasn't sure if it was going to fit in her car, I asked her what type of car it was, she told me it was a red one.  | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/6/2006 6:18:50 AM |
I had a bill collector call and ask for my father. I told them he died in 2001. "That's ok, I'll call back later." Same thing happened after my mother died. Idiots!
Same thing happened to me.A bill collector called the day after my dad's funeral.My sister answered the phone and told them that he was deceased.They asked if she could give them another phone number or forwarding address. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/6/2006 9:16:54 PM | My first job out of high school, I saw the janitor dump a barrel with wheels into one without, then drag it across the warehouse. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/8/2006 4:11:32 PM | | what about the one in the White House? I think thats enough said on that. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/8/2006 6:15:23 PM | There's a gentleman who decided to place a drive thru order. his next request was to have everything........ to go.
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/8/2006 6:58:37 PM |
what about the one in the White House? I think thats enough said on that.
Somewhere in Texas,a village is missing it's idiot. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/8/2006 10:09:49 PM | I know someone who joined an internet dating site believing she'd have a better chance of finding a compatible partner.
Ooops...that was me! | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/10/2006 7:21:52 AM |
*and they walk among us .. and REPRODUCE
Eeeeeeeek!!!!! ....... RUN FOR THE HILLS!!! LOL
Idiots are EVERYWHERE!!! And I divorced one!!!! (he's currently incarcerated cuz he's an IDIOT!!)
I know someone who joined an internet dating site believing she'd have a better chance of finding a compatible partner.
Ooops...that was me!
Join the club, Sweetie...I'm standing right beside you!! And we're in the same sinking boat!! | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/10/2006 7:46:22 AM | Hey Taurus!!!!
This is a great thread you have going here. Sortakinda like Bill Engval's "Here's yer sign" routine. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/10/2006 8:26:56 AM |
I had a bill collector call and ask for my father. I told them he died in 2001. "That's ok, I'll call back later." Same thing happened after my mother died. Idiots!
I live in my grandparents old farm house and I kept the phone number they had since, well since they got a phone put in... anyway I still get calls for both of them (grandfather passed in 1990 and grandmother in 2004) I just tell them that they no longer live here but I have their new number... I give them the number to the cemetery. LOL
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lira
| | Joined: 6/8/2006
Msg: 13 | |
| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/12/2006 5:33:24 AM | | I like to ask people idiotic questions just to see their reaction. I once ask a man in an air force uniform if he had ever been on an air plane.I just like being silly. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/12/2006 5:55:31 AM | IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce."
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
And he was a Kansas City chef.
a chef that works at taco bell? dont really know if i would call a cook at taco bell chef. | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/12/2006 4:05:44 PM | I rolled my car windows down and while in factory working it started to rain. So I ran outside and rolled them up. When I walked back in soaking wet. My coworker looks at me and says "Is it raining?" I looked at her for a second and said "no, I just got hot so I went took a shower." She belived me!!!  | |
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| Arab funnies
Posted: 9/12/2006 6:43:27 PM | I lived & worked in Dubai for many years.
Everything that has happened there in terms of development has been within the past 60 years from having no electricity & running water to being streets ahead of New York with unbelievable developments and wealth.
I had an Arab sponsor there as all companies have to when I started & ran my own commercial diving company.
He was a nice guy, Fadhel was his first name.
When pagers first came out I had one and was in the elevator with Fadhel when it beeped. I looked at it and fadhel said 'Whats is that Mike?"
I said a pager, people can call & page me and I know who called.
"Wallah Mike this is very good huh"
So we are walking across the car park when it beeps again.
"Give me this" says Fadhel, so I give him the pager which he holds to his ear whilst shouting "Hello, Hello"
I cracked up, bless 'im.
Another time he had a rented villa by the sea in Dubai as did many local men of standing (aside from their homes) it was kept secret as that was where he would meet his drinking & party buddies from the Head of police & CID etc as he grew up with these guys. They would drink black label and have bellydancers over etc. (Wives were not to know)
This was when the first mobile phones came out which were like a briefcase, one of his CID buddies had one at the villa. It rang and his buddy chatted on it then said
"fadhel it is for you'
Fadhel nearly crapped himself...."Wallah how they know I am here?!!"
I miss those guys, endless source of amusement & fun.... | |
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| Idiots among us
Posted: 9/13/2006 4:01:38 PM | Bbbashful - the pic of Rowan Atkinson (aka Mr. Bean) looks EXACTLY LIKE MY BROTHER!
What does that say about me?
Gads! | |
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