| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:08:12 AM | Call me old fashioned, but if a man asks a lady out and she has children, don't you think the guy should pay for the sitter?
Or at least offer?
Mine are grown, however I have friends that need help paying for their sitters.
Do men mind paying?
Ladies do you ever bring this up to your date?
How do people feel about this? | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:15:14 AM | Why should the man be obligated to pay for a baby sitter? I don't agree with this at all...
Now the men who don't want to date women with children are making a lot more sense... | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:21:30 AM | That view doesn't sound "old fashioned". "Old fashioned" would be frowning heavily on you for being divorced and for gadding about with a date when you have children to look after.
Thinking your date should pay for your children to be taken care of... seems more kind of 'away with the fairies' to me. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:34:37 AM | Nooo way.. Nooo how! My daughter is my responsibility. If I am going out, I am paying for the sitter, but he can offer to pay for my night out 
No one gets that involved with my children till I decide it is time to, which includes paying for anything that involves them.
If I ask a guy out that has children, I don't want to be stuck paying for his children's babysitting costs when I don't even know him or his children! eesh! goes both ways in my eyes... | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:36:21 AM |
Thinking your date should pay for your children to be taken care of... seems more kind of 'away with the fairies' to me.
Rune3... I like your verbiage much more than my own... I must be losing my touch with eloquence...
I agree, fantasy land is just around the corner if one expects a gentleman to pay for the childrearing for someone they simply want to take out... | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:47:52 AM | If you're willing to date, you should be willing to assume the costs it involves. This money thing, and its expectations, is getting way out of hand in society. I'd have to ask the OP if she'd pay for her dates babysitting costs or is that not something she'd entertain?
Bluez | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 4:54:13 AM | | Not for the first few dates. Perhaps as time goes by this could become a shared expense. If you can not afford to go out on a date look at other alternatives - friends, family. Finding a solution is a way to express your interest in the gentlemen also. Expecting a gentlemen to pick up all your cost of dating is not reasonable. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 5:18:30 AM | I would never have my date to pay for a sitter. To actually have Him pay for someone to watch the kids [that I made with someone else]??? Shock / Horror!
That would be a resounding NO - | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 5:29:13 AM | Why would a woman ever expect a man, who had nothing to do with the creation or upbringing of her children, to pay for a sitter?
I understand that some single moms would probably have difficulty finding the spare cash to pay a sitter... honestly, I don't know how single moms do it, either financially or otherwise, and kudos to those who can make it work... but still. Not the guy's problem.
I would think that asking a guy to pay the sitter might make him think right off the bat that the woman is looking for a sugar-daddy. Don't slam me for that - it's just the image that it conjured up in my head. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 5:42:14 AM | A resounding HELL NO
If you have problems paying for a sitter, go out less frequently.
I did the single mom and dating thing....my date might have driven the sitter home, but he certainly never paid her. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 5:51:51 AM | 
oh my god I've read it all now.
yeah sure he should pay for the sitter, and dinner, and dessert and buy you some flowers and candy and whatever else your little heart desires.
in other words, NO! | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 5:56:01 AM | First of all, I'd be calling you more then just old fashion!
Your children = Your babysitting issues, so deal with them! | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 6:07:54 AM | If it was the first date..........I think it would raise a hundred red flags with this guy
If we were dating for a while and I wanted to attend a specific function with her and she said I won't have money for a babysitter that week.....sure I'd pay
If we were pretty regular together ...I'd offer babysitter pooling (I wonder if the gov. has grant money for that ) so it cost us both less
I have to say I had a lady offer to get me a babysitter so we could go out once......It was nice of her to offer......(but I have great friends that fight over taking him off my hands for a night) | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 6:11:19 AM | | She's the one who had the kids, she should also be responsible for their care... The poor guy is already expected to pick up the tab for everything else, why should he be expected to pay for that too?? Some women (and by no means do I mean all) expect the man to foot the bill for everything and then complain that they aren't being treated as an equal. Put your money where your mouth is and open your own door on occassion. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 6:11:22 AM | If a man wants to take out a single mom he should know their are babysitting issues.
So if I personally want us to have a good time with out you worrying about your child, I'd pony up some cash for the babysitter. Anything to make her comfortable and the date to go smooth. That's just me.
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 6:18:38 AM | If I was to pay for the sitter, dinner and the night out. would I be gettin some or should I just get an escort for the evening
How about bringing the kids with us would that be an option? Probably not.
I got some duct tape. I heard that works too....
Seriously now I could see you pay for dinner and I'll pay for the sitter.. No .. OK how bout we split it down the middle and both go home alone  .. No expectations and no pressure. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 6:39:36 AM | | To the Op what do you think, guys are made of money? Why should I dish out all that money to take you out to dinner and do whatever else and then pay for someone to watch your kids? Pay for your own sitter. I swear some people are just to old fashioned and expect everything from the guy. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 7:26:38 AM | "Old Fashion Values"
Perhaps too many "old fashion values" have been let go or scoffed at by too many. I like "old fashion" with a twist.
What works for you, works for me......additude included.
To the OP......I would never ask but......if it was offered.......I wouldn't refuse. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 7:32:52 AM | I don't think the man should pay for the sitter. They are your children, and your responsibility, including if you choose to go out. If I go on a date, I pay for babysitting - simple. If I were man, I'd be offended if someone asked me to do this, on top of paying for a date. Why should the man have to pay for everything, and why should he be expected to?
Wow - I don't know of anyone who has EVER asked their date to do this. It has nothing to do with being old fashioned - it has to do with being responsible and not taking advantage of a man, and starting a relationship on equal footing. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 7:34:34 AM | Blue Eyed, you asked. Don't be snippy because you don't agree with the answers.
I agree with the concept of PARENTING vs running around drinking. You had the kids. Take care of them.
Consider family activities that the kids can share. Fun doesn't have to revolve around alcohol, does it? If your answer is yes, you should reconsider your role as a parent and what the responsibilities are.
If your gentleman caller is truly into YOU and spending time with you, stay home and play Monopoly with your kids. Rent a family oriented movie and watch it as a group. If the guy won't do that, again, re-evaluate his intentions.
If women aren't ready to be mom, they should wait and have the kids post "wild oats". And if the guy is offering to pay the sitter, I would have some questions about why it's so important that he have you away from the kids.
You have them 18 years. Enjoy them every minute you can. | |
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| Men paying for the sitter ?
Posted: 9/15/2006 7:47:59 AM | I do not think this falls into the old-fashioned category, but rather the tacky category. As I pride myself on my independence, I would NEVER expect a date to pay for anything, much less a sitter for my children.
The care and financial support of my children is my affair, not my date's.
JMHO
Hugs & Sunshine,
Daisyrays | |
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