| Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 3/11/2004 6:11:48 PM | Depending on circumstance, "geek" tends to cover a lot of territory. But I guess a generalisation might be someone who specialises in something. So, a music geek might be someone who knows significantly more than the average person about music. But, if geek is used without some specific context, it usually means someone involved in science or engineering (applied science).
A lot of geeks can avoid emotional content in their lives just by being geeks. For some people (geeks), this is just a side effect. For a minority of geeks, this is something which is actually pursued, often due to genetic influences. Some of us are poorly equipped to even interpret emotional signals, let alone act upon them. And so, we attempt to dive into our "work" and avoid emotional issues. (If you are interested in the genetic predisposition, look into Asperger's Syndrome.)
Fine, with all that as prelude, what does a person do who wants to approximate a "normal" life? Personally, I'm almost 44 and find that most 13 year olds have more experience with dating than I do. Certainly it is not an option for me to date people of similar experience level.
If a person wants to have children some day, what age group should that person be looking at? Declining sperm count is probably the only significant factor for men as they age as far as I know, but for women there are lots of things which come into play. If a person starts a relationship with the goal of having children, you certainly do not want the mother to die in term, to be permanently "scarred", or for the child to have something wrong with them either. There's probably a zillion other things you don't want to happen as well.
This question could go on forever. But, I'll leave it there for now and see what evolves. Thanks.
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 3/13/2004 6:31:38 AM | STOP stereotyping scientists, engineers, and mathematicians. Not all of us are "almost 44 and find that most 13 year olds have more experience with dating."
Whatever the hell your problem is, it has nothing to with studying science, engineering or math. | |
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 3/13/2004 11:28:35 AM | I'll drink to that!!!!!!!!!
I have a very scientific mind... and can count very damn high!!!!
However I must point out... I didnt read that big long dissortation at the beginning of this thread... just too much for me today. But best of luck with whatever it said.... | |
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 3/13/2004 8:09:50 PM | Stop stereotyping scientists, engineers and mathematicians? I certainly had tried to point out that this particular geek is NOT mainstream with respect to science, engineering or math. Certainly I didn't say that studying any of these topics caused my problems. I said that in todays world, a person with my problems often ends up studying those subjects.
In my case, I was 40 or 41 when I finally realised how I got here (where ever that is). Heck, I study all kinds of stuff, not just science, engineering and math. A lot of it in an effort to get to know people better. So, I've gained lots of recognition in athletic first aid for elite soccer teams, taught fitness/weight lifting at gyms for almost a decade, helped people with tax returns, and a zillion other things. Sure, a person gets better at general interactions, but dating is still as opaque now as it ever was for me. I am not the only minority working in technical areas, for which dating is difficult. So, I tried to pose a problem seeking useful suggestions. Instead I get one guy who could use a little more patience and reading comprehension, and another guy who thinks 4 short paragraphs constitutes a dissertation and that counting high is somehow important.
If I knew of a way to help either of you in your quest, I would probably do so. But since it appears that I have nothing to offer you guys from the outset, you decide your best course is to tease or berate a person. Perhaps some day someone will return the favour to you.
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 3/14/2004 4:39:56 AM | Fortran, I feel for you. What you wrote so eloquantly about covers much of what I've thought about regarding relationships and my dating history.
You seem to be in the 15% of the population who can write on a complex level regarding relationships, rather than the usual two or three sentences describing a brief thought moment in a busy, lazy or otherwise distracted person's life.
Relationships do not thrive with lots of cogitation. At best, all they need is mutual respect for each other, and plenty of tact. As well, if you know the direction a relationship is going to take, it helps to tell the other person as many different ways as is possible throughout it. In short, effective communication is one of the keys to a succesful relationship.
Nothing kills a relationship, be it friendship or intimate, than misusing your intelligence to create a sense of inequality e.g. "I am better than you because I am smarter than you" etc.
I thank you for presenting your case, Fortran. Hopefully my contribution is as helpful.
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 3/16/2004 11:33:17 AM | I like Fortran and Sage! Me no am good with girls neither. Phrase "fist full of pardons" comes to mind.
Yeah. I think that my inability to find love is a direct result of my belief that I Am destined to find love. Think of me like this, "To seek the mountain is noble. To veer from the path to seek nourishment from the hill brings disaster." As in, SHE (whoever SHE is) is the Mountain, and the multitude of girls that finds out I'm a virgin are the hill. The Last thing I want is to say to the woman I marry is, "Yeah, I didn't touch a woman till I was 22. Then I snapped."
Cause chicks Do dig that virginity thing. The minute they find out, they absolutely change the way they see me. It goes from "Sweet guy" to "Oooh. I can rape this guy and get away with it." but that's not the case. Sometimes, I wish it was...
But, alas. I'm a Geek. Straight up. I know more about comics than I should, and that knowledge is exceeded only by my Video game expertise. I've been playing Joust since '85. When I was 4. That's alot of time. But I fit mostly into the regular Group. The girls like me, but when somebody needs a "LOTR" quote everone looks at me. (Little do they know I could quote the Kama Sutra too.)
Sigh. Anyway. The voices in my head are telling me that I'm outta stuff to say. They are also telling me what everyone else says. "Go get laid." | |
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 4/14/2004 7:57:02 PM | | yeah I will agree that I didn't feel like reading that abomination of a long post but I will say, as an aerospace major at the naval academy, I never do like generalizations about everyone espectilly if they happen to include me. | |
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 4/15/2004 9:57:11 AM | | geek is kinda a funny term as u stated. i personally think its more of a personality trait rather than how much u know or what ever. its when u choose to put those things like math, music....what ever above friends. you can be as smart as u want, just dont go around flaunting it and throwing it in peoples faces. i guess its just when someone shows a lot of interest in smething that most "normal" people could care less about. | |
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| Re: Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 6/26/2005 3:28:11 PM | | I cannot stand being stereotyped. Becuause I am a grad student in biology and I have always liked math and did well in school, that makes me a nerd? I just dont like when people judge. Yes alot of academic types are socially inept but I am not like that. I learned awhile ago that I can be both--the academic and still "have a life." It's hard. | |
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| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/26/2005 8:39:20 PM | cry a little harder... generalizations are just that.. a general trait of a group that well makes them a group, not all fit into it. If you have nothing better to do that go around looking for places to be offended then you probably DO fit in the socially inept group but are still in denial.
and yes I have spent my whole adult life pursuing higher education whether in a school or on my own.. mostly along the engineering type fields... numbers I understand readily...hell I even have a slight grasp of string theory.... but social behavior I'm just beginning to get a grip, despite attempting it for far longer.
Geeks rock... just find a geek girl.  | |
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| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:14:16 PM | | "Dork": Someone who does what he wants to, is who he is, without pretense. Nothing better. | |
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| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/26/2005 9:27:28 PM | | Um...I would be considered a geek. Most emphatically. I also had kids very young and married very young. Maybe the delayed dating/mating for geeks thing is specific to men? | |
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| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/26/2005 10:41:11 PM | I really don't know about geeks. But I am a sucker for a dork. Big time. | |
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ATPase
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Joined: 3/31/2005
Msg: 18 | |
| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/27/2005 5:35:24 AM | | Explain the difference between geeks and dorks again? | |
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| Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 6/27/2005 8:17:25 AM | Comic book...ahem, excuse me...graphic novel geek represent. =p
Old school, yo!
...
Yeah, I'm bored at work. | |
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| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:44:36 AM | Geek is based on inteligence or the willing pursuit of inteligence, particularly in the scientific/mathmatic fields of study...
Dork is based on less than logical actions and general clumbsiness, whether physical or verbal, on a daily basis...
disclaimer: the above is My personal opinion on the definitions and in no way represents the opinion of this site or Meriam Webster  | |
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ATPase
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Joined: 3/31/2005
Msg: 21 | |
| Re: Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/27/2005 10:59:35 AM | | I'm both to a degree then. Great............... | |
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| Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:01:42 AM | everyone is a geek in some way dude
everybody.
music movies tv books comic books.
everybody has something or another that they know allot about that could qualify them as a geek | |
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| Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:31:20 AM | | just remember, g33ks make more money ;) | |
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| Love and "Geeks"
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:40:17 AM | Love and "Geeks"
I think geeks are the ones left behind...come on girls...conversations are the keys to any important relationship,,,one with a geek can leave you learning and thirsting for more...I'm all for the geek who knows his ou football...and then can show someone a romantic date...you would have me hooked  | |
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ATPase
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Joined: 3/31/2005
Msg: 25 | |
| Love and Geeks
Posted: 6/27/2005 11:52:22 AM | OU as oklahoma...
sorry, It's all about the "U" for me.. (miami hurricanes) | |
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