| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/21/2005 7:03:49 PM | Ok, here’s the scoop:
 You’ve been talking to your date for a while now and your both ready to meet one another. Things go so so, but it wasn’t what you thought or the person didn’t appeal to you in person. You don’t want to make arrangements for another date with this person. How would you deal with this, and what would you tell this person?
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/21/2005 7:05:51 PM | be honest in a nice way. tell them that you just didn't feel the chemistry in person and you think it would be better to just stay friends.
as long as the other person doesn't know where you live or turns into a scary stalker, you should be set after that. you know what to say- just be kind about it :) | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/21/2005 7:15:41 PM | | Honesty is the best policy and the truth of the matter is we can't be attracted to every person we meet.....no matter how well we connect "online" the "live" meet is the deal breaker.....be kind but be truthful....no sense wasting their time or yours when it just isn't there. | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/22/2005 5:19:09 PM | I definitely think that diplomacy and people skills are required. You don't just say good bye without any explanation. Talk about kicking the chair out from under somebody! Not very nice.
I'd tell them honestly that I didn't feel the chemistry or that there were a couple red flags that popped up (usually has to do with differences between what he's looking for and what I'm looking for in a relationship).
And, since every guy I've dated has been basically a good person, I'd tell them that too. I'd remind them of all they have to offer.
I prefer to end on a hug, not a cold shoulder. 
And for petes sake, if you're the one being dumped, don't bother trying to change the other person's mind. Correct any misunderstandings, yes. But nothing else. | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/22/2005 8:05:44 PM |
Just say "Sorry" not interested and say "Hasta La Vista Baby"
I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate a girl doing that to you. Life is a two-way street.
I really do agree with you a girl would not like being told that.
Honest is great just try and be nice about it | |
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DKNWhy
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Joined: 2/16/2005
Msg: 11 | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/24/2005 9:47:30 AM | Yep, be honest, and whatever your reasons, tell them in a kind but STRAIGHTFORWARD way. There's nothing more maddening or disconcerting than having someone tell you in general terms that they aren't interested, or just disappear or never write you back for some unknown reason. I want to know why specifically, so maybe I can change or improve in some way and fix the problem.
It's harder to tell someone your particular dislikes, but it's much more thoughtful to the other person. And especially if they ask you why, Tell them! -- the REAL reasons. Otherwise they'll feel crushed or worthless because they'll think they're just generally unacceptable, and cannot do anything about it. If you lie or sugar-coat it to try to spare their feelings, they will probably suspect your dishonesty and struggle internally a lot more than if you were straight with them.
In general terms - I know someone cares if they will tell me I have bad breath, or that I'm wearing clothes the dog wouldn't sleep on. | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/24/2005 6:22:28 PM | | How about not throwing in the towel after just one meeting. I mean how much can you really learn about the person. There could be a lot more there then meets the eye. Could you try sticking it out and maybe just talking to them the way you were before. Maybe it was too soon. | |
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Mi11ie
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Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 14 | |
| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/24/2005 6:23:07 PM | | some people are very nervous on the first date, especially since really, you kinda on a blind date. It may not hurt to give it one more try and go on a second date, especially if you clicked on the phone. Unless you've hooked up with Quasi Moto or something. . . then run | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/26/2005 6:16:53 AM |  I would say if your with them at that time and you already know you don't want another date, I'd tell them in person. If you’re kind of worried about how their reaction might be or scared of what they'll do, than over the phone or email. I myself would tell them in person and straight up in a nice way. Honesty is the way and if they blame me for being honest then they need to re-look their thoughts of people, you cannot blame anyone for being honest. Tell them in a nice way thought, just don't say it isn't going to work because the first question that comes to their mind is why? That is my thought and ho I would handle it and if anyone has a better one, I'd love to hear it. | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/28/2005 6:29:15 PM | | blackfalon....You have no need to apologise to anyone...It`s not like you have any control over who you are attracted to...At the end of the first date, just say ~i`m really happy to meet you and to put a face to the name. I wish you much luck in your search`..Leave it at that. She will understand. For all you know, she`s looking for an out to because she never felt any chemistry either....If we had chemistry with everyone we met, lord or lord we would be busy people...LOL...Just always be kind...treat her the way you would like to be told if it was reversed...redneckgirl133 | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/28/2005 9:02:56 PM | Hmmm. . .I don't understand how this is different from a poor date with someone you didn't meet online. If I were on a non-online date that didn't work, I'd do my best to enjoy it, and end the date with a hug and a "thank you." It's just polite, for starters.
I would never tell them then and there that I wasn't interested, because it's hasty. Some people have already mentioned this, but it's possible that they were nervous, or shy, and also possible that after some reflection I may rethink my opinion. So, if you're not into someone you go on a date with, wait and tell them later--call or meet them, and be courteous and straightforward (but you don't need to be hurtfully honest "your breath could melt paint"  ). | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/29/2005 12:30:52 PM | | I didn't go about it the best way and we had actually gone out for about a month. it got to serious to fast and I just wasn't feeling it. we didn't have that much in common. I kinda dropped the bomb on her. I know she'll get over me though. I'm not that special a person. | |
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| How to tell your date from the net, it isn’t going to work.
Posted: 3/30/2005 3:12:42 PM | | As I have said before in a forum or two, the best thing for a man to say is nice to meet you. anything else to me is too much. He is seen as a creep in my eyes if he goes into this no chemistry or what he is looking for is not me crap. He then seems to have the assumption that of course I might like him. sometimes I do, sometimes I do not like them. Unless a man is rude, has nothing in common with me whatsoever, talks about other women all night long or makes sexual references, he gets another date with me for the most part. But then I am a bit different woman than most seem to be in some ways, one of them being that average looking men are just fine with me, and looks are not top priority with me. | |
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