| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 12:27:02 PM | I was at a wedding last weekend and these words were uttered as part of the ceremony...
Seemed like they were getting married to their dog! | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 12:38:58 PM | To love, honor and respect ?
To love, honor and promise lots of sex ?
To love, honor and respect that sex is important :)  | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 12:40:30 PM | lmao..........I thought OBEY had been taken out of the vows this day and age.....guess I was wrong.
Personally.......I wouldn't want the word OBEY in my vows. How about Love, honor, respect? I don't know........guess I have the problem with the word OBEY!!
Oh well, to each his own. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 12:42:32 PM | The minister at my sister's wedding insisted that had to be a part of the vows since her wedding was very traditional, and instead of fighting him about it she just crossed her fingers when she said that part. Her husband knew better.  | |
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xamo
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Joined: 3/24/2006
Msg: 6 | |
| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 12:56:29 PM | Really, what was the point of taking an oath in that church with that minister then ? It was their choice to get married in that church, with that minister presiding. She felt strongly about that part, I can respect that, but not strong enough to make her case clear ? If you don't believe in the church you are getting married in, or the oath you are taking, why get married there ? and why assume that you (any/everyone) need this to legitimise the relationship ?  It seems like itis getting moreobvious that is primarily a religious institution, they don't have the divorce rates that the rest of us do, and maybe for good reason. Maybe they really do take the oath seriously, and are able to accept that authority over their lives, that the marriage is more important than their own personal opinions on what is right or wrong for them personally ? Personally, it seems like there is no point in getting married in a church and crosing you fingers while taking an oath, more so it's a joke. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 1:00:29 PM | we had a choice between obey and cherish
he wanted obey, I wanted cherish, we let our mothers cast a vote...both chose cherish.
I should have paid attention right there....he REALLY did want obey!! | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 1:01:51 PM | Mine were:
I, [my name] / in the name of the spirit of God / that resides within us all / by the life that courses / within my blood / and the love that resides/ within my heart / take thee [ex's name] / to my hand, my heart, and my spirit, / to be my chosen one. / To desire thee / and be desired by thee, / to possess thee, /and be possessed by thee, / without sin or shame, /for naught can exist / in the purity of my love for thee. / I promise to love thee / wholly and completely without restraint, / in sickness and in health, / in plenty and in poverty, / in life and beyond, / where we shall meet, remember, and love again. / I shall not seek to / change thee in any way. / I shall respect thee, / thy beliefs, thy people, / and thy ways as I respect myself.
Hers were the same, just with the names flipped.. Too bad she forgot that whole respect thing..(cheated on me)..I wrote them based on a few things I found online.. but I always joked about putting the love, honor, obey stuff in her vows.
I also jokingly suggested the wedding march be replaced by The Imperial March from Star Wars..and in retrospect, it was perfect for her. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 1:42:56 PM | | I think a certain amount of obedience on the part of both husband and wife is healthy in a mutually respectful relationship. I wouldn't have a problem having it in my ceremony. | |
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weshep
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Joined: 7/23/2006
Msg: 10 | |
| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 1:47:25 PM | My ex and I were married by a Justice of the Peace as we're both not very religious and come from families with vastly different religions to begin with. Anyway, he said "To love, honor, and cherish..."
The word obey is simply because of the style of wedding. The vows don't mean much. It's the licenced person signing your marriage certificate that does. That's why vows don't hold in court like a prenup does.
If it did, I would have sued my wife for breach of contract when she cheated on me. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:08:43 PM | | When I was growing up we had a plaque on the kitchen wall that read " I am the master of this house and whatever my wife says will be done". | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:09:56 PM | xamo, because it was the church my sister went to when she was a child... It was just a cute thing she did to make everyone giggle during the ceremony.
Me? This kind of thing is why if I get married I'm having a ceremony with about ten guests with a minister I don't know so he won't argue with me. Haha. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:28:42 PM | The 'obey' part has been left out for quite some time now, by most people. Traditionally, it was only the woman's part that included the word 'obey'. The husband's did not.
Of course, at the end of THOSE ceremonies, the couple were declared Man and Wife.... | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:44:56 PM | | Me? All I remember is I did say "I do", without fully understand or paid attention to what the Minister read to me. I was too excited on my wedding day and refused to listen any advices or anyone. Oh, but we didn't marry in a Church. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:49:11 PM | | In most cases, even in the Roman Catholic faith, you're given the option to omit the 'obey' portion. Maybe this particular minister/priest was a zealot... I think it was likely a personal preference on HIS behalf. | |
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ernb
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Joined: 8/23/2006
Msg: 16 | |
| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:53:03 PM |
I only obey when having sex. Sometimes.
Your wish is my command! 
If I were ever to get m..m...married (sorry, choked on the word) again, it would be me that would insist leaving that out...I can't imagine keeping a straight face while she was saying it. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:53:37 PM | yeah obey each other...I can ride that, if you trust one another you know they're not goin to walk you blindly into a wall. Obey each others wishes...not thier orders. If someone asks you to do something because it will make them happy you do it because you love them & if they ask you not to do something the same applies. I'd sign up to obey...its a question on trust & i wouldn't be there if i didnt trust him.  | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 2:56:06 PM | | Actually the still say this in a Catholic unless they write there own vows i don't think that it is meant to be one sided but to obey the laws of the concept of the marriage and what it stands for and if you not willing to say it why would you want to get married just flock around and just have sex and demoralize the world even more.... | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 3:12:23 PM | | The vows are more of a suggestion, really. Half of all weddings end in divorce anyway, so who the hell cares? | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 3:12:29 PM | | well i can only speak as a catholic i was alterboy for the church for 7yrs and did many weddings and it is somthing they both say... but again when you love someone to obey them be faithful is the same thing... i guess i am in a elite group that belives that religon is something we need more of in this world butagain on this site we are looking for someone to be with for a long time and some just to hook up for fun but i belive marriage is sacred....... | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 3:24:15 PM | | The oaths are to one another, ie the couple. So, if you want to be traditional then then say the obey. If that is a problem leave it out. Alot of poeple take the oaths lightly anyway, it used to be death due us part. So, throw whatever you want into it. Want to add that pasta is to be made only be th bride and the remote is a shared poession that must be placed on the table after use go ahead. It really only matters to the couple. | |
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| To love, honor, and... OBEY?!?
Posted: 10/17/2006 3:26:40 PM | | With all due respect Cabby, I think you were an altar boy MANY years ago. As a French Canadian, my upbringing has been RC, and when I got married only 7 yrs ago, we were given a choice between cherish and obey. Even the Roman Catholic faith has changed somewhat with the times...heck..women are even allowed birth control AND communion in this decade... | |
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