| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:31:05 AM | Hi everyone im mel xx i just want to know what any of you think i tend to have quite a lot of male friends but when i get a boyfriend they hate it and no longer want me to talk to them do you think this is right? | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:33:17 AM | umm.. its called jealousy, set him straight
unless of course you are hanging off your male friends .. a lil' too close | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:35:08 AM | | I dont think there is anything wrong with having male friends either and I am having the same problem you are, too. My boyfriend is really protective of me and hates that I have other make friends but I told him it's something he needs to get used to or else he cant be with me. This isnt the first time this has happened but I dont tell the guys that they need to ditch their girl friends so they shouldnt expect the same from us... | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:36:31 AM | | I totally agree with what your saying but then they tend to come out with well i havent any female mates anyway | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:37:26 AM | | whitetigeress- I dont get too close to my mates they are mates just blokes dont like it | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:38:53 AM | whitetigeress- I dont get too close to my mates they are mates just blokes dont like it
then that should help guide you in who to pick and who to not pick | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:40:32 AM | It's simple........ALL your male friends want to sleep with you.
Here's an experiment......... ask them at random if they would like a night of fun and each and every one of them would say yes.
It's different for us women, we can have male friends and not want them in our beds, with men.... that's generally not the case. I have never met a man who doesn't have a problem with another wanting to see his girlfriend naked.
I had a boy friend several years ago, who was convinced that I had slept with another good friend of mine. I hadn't of course, but I could never convince him otherwise.
So in a sense, yes to message #2 you may very will call it jealousy but I refer to it more as a sword fight or a pissing contest.
:))
Witchy | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:41:01 AM | I don't see why a girl can't have male friends when she is going out with someone else.
As long as there's no sexual chemistry between them, that does rub a guy up the wrong way. | |
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EB1
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Joined: 7/31/2006
Msg: 9 | |
| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:41:23 AM | Of course, you can have male friends. Personally I have 2 close male friends.
But I do not flirt with them or any other kind of sexual innuendoes.
I'm probably going a bit off topic here, but I'm always suprised when I hear women saying that they do not have female friends. Why do you think is the reason for you not having female friends? | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:44:22 AM | I have a great guy friend. We go out for sushi and talk about everything including the love interest in our lives! It's very healthy to have a friend of the opposite sex...it can be done and is done!  | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:46:40 AM | | That sounds like something my boyfriend would say, all of your male friends just want to be your friend to sleep with you. I've had male friends in the past that I used to hook up with but thes ones that I had any kind of sexual connection with, I totally stopped talking to for my boyfriend and the other guys who were never anything more than friends, I kept around. I guess everyone is going to have their different opinions on this but I feel that you should be able to have male friends just as well as they cant have their female friends. when my boyfriend and I first got together, he stopped talking to all of his female friends since he was with me, but that was his choice and something that he chose to do with any influence from me so I am guessing that since he did that on his own, he thought I would do the same. I would never let a man come in between my friendship with others, whether they be male or female. If and when that relationship does fail and you dont have any friends, you have no one to blame but yourself. | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 12 | |
| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 10:34:51 AM | I kind of think its a tad bit of the double standard (men can have women friends but women can't have men friends). Probably some insecurity here as well.
Yes, a woman can have a platonic relationship with men! The way I look at it is this, the friends you have BEFORE you meet someone, you shouldn't have to give up that friendship just to make your new partner happy. If you find your partner wants you to drop your friends that in itself is a red flag. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 10:40:48 AM | | i think its quite possible for girls to have guy friends. heck, i have two close gf's and the rest of my friends are guys. its mainly because i have more in common with guys then i do with girls...just my personality and such. if my bf cant handle it i show him the door, after all my bf is introduced to them anyways just so that he can see the interaction we have. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 10:47:52 AM | | Yes, I can have a male friend. In fact, I have many male friends. I can easily and comfortably say that some of my dudefeller friends are not sexually attracted to me in the least. Though some may enjoy the swell of my breast clad in a shirt, they know all too well that my breasts are my own and do not ache for the ministrations of their hands or mouth. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 11:03:18 AM | Yes, I have male friends. One of my closest male friends died last January and it was (and remains) a big loss to me. He was a former SO, to boot. I have 3 male friends I cherish.
My boyfriend has absolutely no problem with my male friendships, because he has similar friendships with women, and understands completely the possiblity of being friends with the opposite sex. As neither of us are possessive or jealous, and we trust each other, we never question our contact with other-sex friends. I actually find it to be a bonus that he has friendships with women, because that shows me that he values women for something other than sexual gratification, and that he can relate to women on a friendship level.
I would never become involved with a man who has problems with my male friendships. Sheesh, if I wasn't doing them before I became involved with a man, why on earth would I do them after??? | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 11:08:40 AM | My best friend is a guy and he has been my best friend for 15 years. He has been there for me in the best of times and the worst. We have never slept together and never will. Yes he is very attractive, single, financially stable and straight. He tells me what I need to hear which at times not what I want to hear. He really does help me understand the male species.
As for the question about women having a hard time being friends with women. For me it is because it is rare to find a friend that I can share everything without fear of rejection, judgement, some form of manipulation and my all time favorite them feeling threatened if I talk to their boyfriends or husbands. I don't have to deal with any of that with my guy friends. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 11:30:05 AM | First off, I think any woman can have male friends and I mean the ones they have never slept with. Same goes for men, I think they too can have female friends(not slept with). I think having members of the opposite sex as friends is rather good. IMO it is good because for WOMEN, they can get a guys perspective on things and vise versa for men.
I don't think any one person should tell another who they can or cannot be friends with. I have a really good male friend and his friendship has been valuable on so many occasions. He has seen me through good relationships and even the bad. I talk to him about them and he gives me HIS/male perspective and take on things. I have learned much from him and would NOT trade his friendship for anything in the world. If I am with a new person and they cannot handle me talking to my Male friend, well then that is their problem and I would have doubts about the "new" man as I would fear he had trust issues and or jealousy issues. I would hope that any "new" man in my life would get to know my friends, including the male friend, and enjoy their company as I do and not get jealous if I talk to them or my male friend . So to answer your question, NO I don't think it is right.
Just my thoughts. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:07:12 PM | I love having male friends, at times it's just necessary and they are so easy to get along with:)
There are actually a lot of advantages to having male friends:
no competition
less drama
protection and comfort when going out (less chances to have to deal with losers that hit on you:))
Besides they give the best advice concerning the opposite sex:) | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:13:46 PM | I have many male friends - but just like alot of the replies - if asked most of my friends would jump at the chance. It's my responsibilty to keep these relationships platonic and if the pressure becomes to intense I resolve the situation immediately. I haven't had to do this very often - but occassionally things get out of hand. I do not share details about the physical relationships I'm involved with - let us not lead others into temptation... Only my thoughts. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:18:50 PM | I had some male friends once, but then they turned gay on me and made me very uncomfortable.
So now I only have female friends... and although many of them have also turned gay on me, for some reason it doesn't bother me as much.
Seriously though... my ex-wife was cheating with a guy who she always told me was gay for over a year before I found out it was all a deception. So, as jbpknox mentions below...I wouldn't want a girlfriend who was out partying with guy friends for obvious reasons!
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:19:30 PM | I guess he should allow you to have as many male friends as you will allow him to have female friends, and the same degree of closeness. How often would you let him be alone with one of his clingy female friends, and how 'alone' should they be?
My take on it is, if I cant go with him sometimes when he's going someplace with a female friend, then she's too close, and vice versa. If you dont want him around when your male friends are there, then maybe you need to rethink one of the relationships.... | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:25:05 PM | | The number of male friends she should be, um, allowed to have needs to be equal to the number of female friends he is, um, allowed to have? Wow! I can't say that I've ever let a dudefeller tell me how many friends I'm allowed to have, nor have I ever added or detracted from my base of friends simply to match the number of friends he possesses. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever let a dudefeller tell me who I can and cannot befriend, regardless of gender, race, income, profession, or anything else. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:28:09 PM | Not a big deal. Boys are always jealous and possessive. All you have to do is dump them when they act that way.
And yes you can have male friends provided they are strictly friends and nothing else. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 12:30:44 PM |
Not a big deal. Boys are always jealous and possessive. All you have to do is dump them when they act that way
Ummm... in my experience it's girls who are always jealous and possessive. | |
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| Can you have male friends?
Posted: 10/23/2006 1:14:15 PM | ^^^Who cares, da hitman, you and I are not Siamese twins, so we obviously don't think alike. Good day.
Yes and yes, you can have male friends. | |
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