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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/2/2006 8:21:56 PM | I just heard a story of a woman who recycles toilet paper, I am thinking there are some serious issues with mental stabilty and not to mention health issues. haha
But the more I think of this it has to be an urban legend, although really think the floss recycling was true! ........ Yikes! | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/2/2006 9:27:14 PM | OMG, i could say alot on this one , but i will get back on it ...........  just have to remember it all...... dated a alot of guys with money and after dating them I know why they have money ... right down too used dallor store shampoo ......... nasty if your goin to date me .. upgrade | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/3/2006 2:10:52 AM | | I have never really had that problem. Usually if someone was short on cash they'd be honest about it and we'd either pick something affordable or (mostly) free or I'd cover the cost. It's gone the other way a few times as well. I'd rather just say the money's tight that week and still be able to do something than hum and haw about it, not fess up and wind up doing nothing with the other person. | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/3/2006 4:39:20 PM | | Asked to meet me, meet at Starbuck's, gets himself a coffee and says to me after he sits down "aren't you getting yourself anything?" | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/3/2006 8:52:31 PM | When your significant other doesnt see 'landing a job' as a reason to celebrate. Nor a birthday. Just b/c money's tight doesnt mean life isnt still happening nor worthy of celebrating b/c yer broke 
A real cheap date - it goes totally downhill when he confesses he hasnt showered in a few days to 'conserve water and save money on his bill' UGH! EW! | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/4/2006 7:55:12 AM |
Asked to meet me, meet at Starbuck's, gets himself a coffee and says to me after he sits down "aren't you getting yourself anything?"
Hey I think we had a date with the same guy LOL!!
You know cheap when someone buys two drinks for himself or each person at a time so as to not have to tip twice at a bar!! | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/4/2006 4:27:55 PM | I am afraid I dated him too! Wow what a player he is! hehe
This was a few years back and he invited me for lunch, paid for his and then asked if I will be eating? Don't have to tell ya that was the last time I saw that guy! | |
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tadger
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Joined: 7/11/2006
Msg: 11 | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 3:28:33 AM | Yes, you're right, always good to put a positive spin on things...he knew a good girl(s) when he found them....but too bad he is a total loser!
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 5:39:09 AM | I was thinking about the American tourist is saw this summer.
Took 23 cents out of the "have a penny, share a penny dish" to buy a 99 cent item.
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 8:14:23 AM | Good point Gerry....
There are cheap men and women...but i know i am VERY generous and cant see why men cant be chivalrous...doesnt mean for the rest of the relationship or whatever that he always has to pay, its just a super nice gesture.
I know my independence intimidates men, I have had way too many experiences with it and work hard to let a guy know I want him to be generous and chivalrous.....so for me its a catch 22.
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 9:39:48 AM | A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?"
He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she."
Regards,
Mac | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 1:11:53 PM | re: Chivalry....From "The 'true' romantic: benevolent sexism and paternalistic chivalry"
Sex Roles: A Journal of Research, Nov, 2003 by G. Tendayi Viki, Dominic Abrams, Paul Hutchison
"....chivalrous behavior is essentially men doing all the "work" during courtship while women play a more passive role. However, we believe that it is possible for men to be polite and considerate to women, without simultaneously placing restrictions on how women should behave in relationships (e.g., individuals may believe it is okay for both men and women to play active roles in the development of a relationship). In our view, such behavior constitutes general interpersonal politeness, and not chivalry. For purposes of the current research, we use the term paternalistic chivalry to highlight attitudes that are both courteous and restrictive to women.
The above definition of paternalistic chivalry is consistent with how Glick et al. (2000) described benevolent sexism. .....hostile sexism and benevolent sexism may be of more predictive value within gender-based interpersonal relationships..... research findings that indicate that benevolent sexism is related to conservative beliefs concerning how women should behave within intimate relationships would converge with Glick et al.'s findings (Glick et al., 1997) and offer further support for the argument that benevolent sexism, although positively valenced, restricts women's freedom. Such findings would also have important implications for the general societal assumption that women are fortunate because they have men to take care of them."
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The authors of the paper above essentially argue that attitudinally, chivalrous attitudes are related to sexist attitudes. [This papers isn't something that's unique, there's lots of other evidence the two are quite often connected.] The idea that men should be "chivalrous" (as opposed to interpersonal politeness in the same way they would be towards another friend) has embedded within it the idea of traditional sex-role attitudes....in other words, that men should be "in charge", be responsible for the finances, look after the house & the car, be responsible for organizing and directing the social endeavours, etc. The proposal that men should be "chivalrous" -- as in offering to pay on a date etc, or implicitly being *required* to pay -- as opposed to being "polite", is inherently contradictory with the idea of "independent" women who are to be treated as equals.
I thought, overall, that some might find the above perspectives something to ponder as these issues implicitly crop up in many threads. | |
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tadger
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Joined: 7/11/2006
Msg: 18 | |
| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 1:12:36 PM | Hmmm, msg. 13
Good points - but if I invite you for a coffee, I will buy you a coffee and not expect you to get it yourself.
However, point taken.
tt | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 1:24:04 PM | Oh, wait, are you inviting me to coffee??
ROFL
I do get your point too Tadger.
But if the cultural expectation is that men will do the asking, then by definition they're apparently automatically doing the paying as well.
I'll readily accept the argument that it is possible that women here at POF ask men out just as often as they get asked out.  | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 1:30:08 PM | Ok Mac that was just too funny and hopefully it was a joke!
on the subject of coffee buying - sure it would be great if the "date" supposing "first" one bought the coffee. I would expect it if "I" was invited. Now if I did the inviting, " I " would expect to pay.
The opposite of cheap - I went on a date that I suggested we go out to a restaurant for supper when we were only going to go for coffee and after I said I would pay, he declined. Eventhough I inisted because I was the one to suggest it. He would not let me! I am still optimistic that very every cheapo there are 5 or more like the ones i talked about.
Indicating bad services at a restaurant - 1 cent is the golden rule - never heard of 2 cents! Maybe that's being generous on the insult in services - lol. | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 3:00:55 PM |
Maybe he was testing how "independent" you all were.....
I don't think courtesy has anything to do with being independent. If I invited someone out for coffee I would offer to pay, and also if they invite me I don't assume they will pay. But if they come out of the gate with obvious miser like qualities, it is a turn off for me. I guess it is because I have always been a very generous person, and not just in monetary ways.
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tadger
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Joined: 7/11/2006
Msg: 22 | |
| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 4:24:26 PM | Sure, Gerrymac, I'll buy you a coffee.
can we wait 'til my NSERC funding comes through though? my kids seem to have sucked up most of my $$ for xmas.
Unfortunately, I have spent 99% of my dating life being the one who pays because 1. as I said before, people who have money make me nervous and 2. they always seem to forget their wallet and 3. I seem to date alot of tossers - oh wait, that goes with #2!
ah well, guess I'm just too ... independent.... | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/5/2006 7:09:59 PM | I have never have to pay, my dates always have taken care of the bills. I am a bit old-fashiond that way. They were all gentlemen.
Except, when I went out with ''just'' friend , I always paid half of the bill to draw the line and let him know I was not taking advantage of him..and not to even expect a kiss ..well may be a hug.
If I had to pay half the bill, I would not be be dating the man, that is for sure. Just imagine, if he were to be so stingy at the very beginning of dating , how else would he treat a woman in a relationship?
If it was a relationship situation, he was never treated badly at all, I cooked decent meals, chinese food etc..and treat him like a King at my home....but he helped out around the house( I never had to ask).,...also.presents for special dates etc.. | |
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| You know he/she is cheap when...
Posted: 12/6/2006 2:49:03 AM | Seems like CJ is right. At least OFFER to cover half. If it's a mutual decision to go out, usually it's safe to assume pay for your own. If someone's inviting you out and makes a big deal out of doing so, they're probably expecting to pay for the whole thing. Handle it on a case-by-case basis... but don't be cheap and expect it every time.
If I can't afford to do something for whatever reason I'll be up front about it during the planning stage. Yes, cheapos, before you GET there. It's very awkward to tell your date when you finish your second slice of cheesecake after a gourmet meal that you can't really afford to eat at Chez Wherever. If you're up front about it, and offer to get the NEXT meal, then maybe they'll cover you this time. If you aren't, you probably won't get to have another lunch date with that particular person.
Indicating bad services at a restaurant - 1 cent is the golden rule - never heard of 2 cents! Maybe that's being generous on the insult in services - lol.
At one time including a penny with the tip meant "Great service, thank you!" Putting only a penny would get the point across, I guess, since leaving no tip often means that you're either just cheap or mostly broke at that point. Usually I like to point it out to either the server OR, failing any kind of acceptable attention or service from said server(and I've recently run into that), the management. That way they KNOW they messed up and, with luck, the customer will be satisfied with how the problem was handled.
I went out recently somewhere, had horrid service with cold, bland and improperly cooked food. The server didn't seem to care, another server from another section did more than our server did to rectify the situation. I have to admit that it wasn't more than telling OUR server about the first of many issues with the food that arrived at our table.. but at least they did something.
It was to the point where I didn't want to ever eat there again, but the manager recovered somewhat with some gift certificates. I still don't think I'll be going back, I'm sick of bad food and unacceptable service in restaurants around Halifax. It's been going downhill lately, though I must admit that I've been to a few places that have "WOWed" me every single time.
If you ask me, my entire meal (except the drinks and dessert, which were fine) should have been comped, or re-cooked when I pointed out the problems. You don't offer to "warm up" someone's food. You go get them a new meal. A (supposedly) decent restaurant where the bill climbs quickly toward 80 dollars for two people should not be offering to microwave your meal for you to heat it back up when it arrives at the table COLD, even McGeneric Fast Foody's doesn't do that.
Ah, sorry about the rant... I guess that it's still driving me nuts two weeks later. | |
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