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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/3/2006 8:32:38 PM | I have a beautiful 18 month old son and one girl on the way from a female who completely f'ed me over.
I have met with several family law people and lawyers and have came to this conclusion; because I am a man, I get no rights. If you have a baby with a woman you are not with, its in your best interest to learn how to become a part time dad and work your ass off so your childs mother can do whatever she wants with your money. I truly believe (men will agree, and Im sure women should too) that if a man is ready, willing and capable of caring for his child he should not be forced to pay child support. Ladies are saying, well they can do that!! Wrong....this is why......
Woman gives birth, takes a year off for maternity leave, man has to work to provide for the baby while the woman receives child tax credit, baby bonus, EI benifits and many other types of help. If the man has only one child, he may not have to work 2 jobs to support his children, or as I and many others see it, the mothers- they might see their kids on the weekends. Now a man sees his kids on the weekends or when he is not working, if he dares to do something for himself one weekend, he is labelled a bad father for not spending time with his kids. Now, after that year is over and both parents are working (some moms dont becuase they make enough from the dads) The dad may want joint custody.......why wont he get it? Because he has not created the bond with the child like the mother has, therefore he is being punished for doing something he was made to do in the first place. Judges will award custody to the mom. Moms will have custody unless they do something to endanger the childs life, thats it.
Now, you wonder why so many men run away from their responsibilties of being a father, it is way to hard on them. Many take off loving their children to death, but leaving is better and easier then leading a life of misery and not being able to be a large part in their childrens lives. Women need to take responsibility for fatherless children just as much as father themselves.
A women can smoke, drink and do drugs during pregnancy and a man can do nothing about it. Women know they have all the rights....they drive us to leave. Why cant anything be just about the children? As men we have to stand up to this system that we have because even the people at the top know its not right. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/3/2006 8:52:40 PM | I feel for you brother! For many years, I have paid child support (in the tune of $1100/month for 2 girls). It's a pain in the butt, the mother can do whatever she wants with the money, kids, etc..... You wind up working for about half of your actual salary after taxes etc..
There is light at the end of the tunnel though!! Stay in their lives & keep the relationship with your kids. It'll pay off in the end. My oldest daughter recently moved in with me & I'll be getting custody of my youngest daughter soon. Being a single parent can be demanding, but has a great payoff. Now that my youngest can speak for herself, the courts will listen!
Stay true to your kids, bite your lip with their mom, but for their sake & yours, be there for them! I look back at some of the things I missed out on because I caved & let the mom win & have lived to regret it. Learn from my mistakes. Luckily, my girls loved me enough to look past such immaturities. In a short time, they'll be both under my roof.
The system will work, but you need to show them that your'e in their lives for the long haul. Hang in there! Remember this if not anything else. Once that time is gone, you can't get it back. It's gone forever. Good Luck!!!! | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/3/2006 8:56:40 PM | A lot of what you are saying is just not accurate at all... it sounds to me like you are extremely bitter about your own situation.
A women can smoke, drink and do drugs during pregnancy and a man can do nothing about it
That is wrong. Yes, a woman can choose to smoke, but some don't because they know how harmful it is for their child. The ones that choose to smoke, okay there is nothing you can do about that... but as for drinking and doing drugs?? Are you kidding me?? Yes, you can do something about that. If the mother of your unborn child is doing drugs you'd better phone the police and social services.
Now a man sees his kids on the weekends or when he is not working, if he dares to do something for himself one weekend, he is labelled a bad father for not spending time with his kids
I can see how a father should be labelled a bad parent if they are not visiting their child upon the agreed times and days... of course everyone needs some time off, so get a babysitter just like the childs mother must do if she wants to go out on a night when she has the child.
The dad may want joint custody.......why wont he get it? Because he has not created the bond with the child like the mother has
What retarted lawyer told you that you won't get joint custody?? That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. If you have a child with someone, you both automatically have joint custody. If you are not taking advantage of the fact then you are creating your own situation. When one parent does not make an effort to be a parent to their child, that is when the court will give the order of sole custody to the other parent.
Moms will have custody unless they do something to endanger the childs life, thats it
My kids mom did not endanger their life, yet I have sole custody of my two children because I'm simply the better parent and I proved it in court... and without a lawyer too.
Why cant anything be just about the children?
It IS about the children... however it sounds like you are trying to make it about yourself because you don't feel it's fair you have to pay your ex for a portion of the living expenses for your own flesh and blood.
I truly believe (men will agree, and Im sure women should too) that if a man is ready, willing and capable of caring for his child he should not be forced to pay child support.
In any joint custody situation there can be a child maintenance agreement, which is usually done through court and based on your income through a maintenance guildlines book... now, if both parents take care of the child 50% of the time then maintenance is not as much of an issue... HOWEVER, if the father makes $100K/year and the mother is only making $40K/year then the court will order the father to pay the mother some child support so the child can live the same lifestyle whether he's staying the night at his mother's or his fathers... the situation can also be reversed if the mother is making more that the father. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/3/2006 9:16:21 PM | There is light at the end of the tunnel though!! Stay in their lives & keep the relationship with your kids. It'll pay off in the end. My oldest daughter recently moved in with me & I'll be getting custody of my youngest daughter soon. Being a single parent can be demanding, but has a great payoff. Now that my youngest can speak for herself, the courts will listen!
I think that's the frustrating part. Why do the kids have to endure the decade or more (or less, depending on their age at separation) of being subjected to an irresponsible mother before the courts will listen to reason? I don't think you need to have a degree in rocket science to figure out that giving birth does not automatically qualify one as the better of two parents. However the courts don't have a tendency to view it that way. Eventually they may come around after tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars in legal fees, or when the children are of the age when they can decide where they want to live, but very seldom will they actually believe a father is good enough before either of those two events transpires.
It is true that fathers are primarily viewed as "bread winners" by the courts, which is why they have come up with Child Support Guidelines to be automatically enforced where an agreement cannot be reached by both parties, yet they have no Child Custody Guidelines by which children are ensured an acceptable amount of time with both parents. It's also why all the terms for fathers are based on money as well. A Dead Beat Dad is a father who doesn't pay his child support, while a Disneyland Dad is one who spends too much money on his children. Fathers are just bank accounts in the eyes of the courts. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/3/2006 9:18:43 PM | "Women know they have all the rights....they drive us to leave."
Sounds pretty bitter to me.... I guess all women are the same then eh? hmm.. strange
When you say, "even the people at the top know its not right",
who are you referring to? | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/3/2006 9:32:15 PM | TwinDaddy, we must chat sometime. I would love to hear a dad's POV on having twins.
OP, bitter much? Geez... There are so many things wrong with your line of thinking, I don't even know where to start! | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 5:28:36 AM | 1. Social Services will do nothing for unborn children.
2. If work the entire first year of the childs life and the mother stays home with the child, you will not (in most cases) get joint custody because the mother has developed a bond with the child that the father has not.
3. If you proved you were the better parent, without a lawyer and without the mother endanging the child, she must not have put up any fight or there is something you left out here.
4. It should be about the children, if a man has to constantly work to pay money to a women he will not have that time with his children which, effects the children. Like I said, if a father is ready, willing and capable......which many are.
5. Lastly, i totally agree with your last statement. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 5:37:57 AM |
I have met with several family law people and lawyers and have came to this conclusion; because I am a man, I get no rights.
Then you've come to the wrong conclusion.
If you have a baby with a woman you are not with, its in your best interest to learn how to become a part time dad and work your ass off so your childs mother can do whatever she wants with your money.
Sounds like you're bitter because you don't want to have to help out. Remember, children are expensive. It's only right that you help out with your share of the expenses.
Woman gives birth, takes a year off for maternity leave, man has to work to provide for the baby while the woman receives child tax credit, baby bonus, EI benifits and many other types of help.
Why are you angry about that? Isn't she getting those things to help with the financial "burden" of paying for the child you helped create?
Now a man sees his kids on the weekends or when he is not working, if he dares to do something for himself one weekend, he is labelled a bad father for not spending time with his kids
That's why you should have a visitation agreement drawn up between you and made into a court order. My ex refused to make up a schedule, and thought that calling every few months or so the day he wanted to see them was "good enough". He actually wanted me to stay home when he had the kids too just in case he had to go out and do something. My answer. I have to get a babysitter, so do you. If they're with you, you're responsible...too bad.
The dad may want joint custody.......why wont he get it? Because he has not created the bond with the child like the mother has, therefore he is being punished for doing something he was made to do in the first place. Judges will award custody to the mom. Moms will have custody unless they do something to endanger the childs life, thats it.
Not true. My ex didn't see the kids regularly for years. THAT's why he didn't end up with joint custody. The judge told him flat out that if he had made up a visitation schedule and stuck to it, he'd have 50/50 joint. Because he wouldn't, he wasn't seen as a responsible enough. He messed it up for himself. As for your assumption that it would take something like that for the custodial parent to lose custody, it's not true. As well, it doesn't matter what the NCP has done to the child, he/she still has visitation rights, even if supervised.
Now, you wonder why so many men run away from their responsibilties of being a father, it is way to hard on them. Many take off loving their children to death, but leaving is better and easier then leading a life of misery and not being able to be a large part in their childrens lives. Women need to take responsibility for fatherless children just as much as father themselves.
There is NO excuse for not being a responsible parent, even if you and the mother aren't together. To me, and most I'm sure, being responsible means taking care of half of the child's financial needs, and to see them on a consistant basis. Wanting some "me" time is not a good enough excuse. If you make a commitment, stick to it.
A women can smoke, drink and do drugs during pregnancy and a man can do nothing about it. Women know they have all the rights....they drive us to leave. Why cant anything be just about the children? As men we have to stand up to this system that we have because even the people at the top know its not right.
Men are not driven away by women if they do not let themselves be. Like I said, you don't have to be a partner to your baby's mother, but you do have to stay in your child's life. It's very ironic that you complain that it should be just about the children, but you haven't mentioned anything related to them at all....just a bunch of complaints about their mothers. Why don't YOU sit back and think about the children and stop letting your hate interfere? | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 5:38:48 AM | Obviously I am bitter about my situation yet I have heard a ton of horror stories from other single fathers as well. Dads get a shitty rap and they have to fight for the rights the women already get in court.
My situation in a nutshell, I moved back from Calgary to be with my son after I heard my ex was pregnant, I got a house, I moved her in so she could finish school(we are not together) I was liad off, she receives the Child Tax Credit, I believe this money should go to the baby, not for what ever she chooses- I called the gov. regarding this and they told me that the woman receives this, not the man. Also I was told because she lives with me that this works against me even more. blah, blah, blah...
Its hard to explain everything that happens to a man if you are not a man that has been put through the ringer before.
To answer your question about people on the top, Im talking judges.......Ive spoke to a judge, mother of a friend and many family law lawyers and they all know its quite one sided, men just simply give up because its better to do that then lose their minds!! | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 5:51:08 AM | I would like to here a story where a women fought to have sole custody and did not get it and why? While I have 2 jobs and I am supporting the mother of my child (who I do not even like)while she finishes school for my sons benefit......my mind is always with my children, this is about the system, not the mothers.
scenario.....
2 people are together, the women gets pregnant and decides she doesnt want to be there anymore and moves 2 hours away to be with her family. When that baby is born, what do you think the mans options are? He has a child already and a job. Does he take paternity leave....nope, he needs to work to support the child he has, not that he wouldnt have to fight like hell to get it anyway. Men are made to be part time dads. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 5:53:28 AM |
I have a beautiful 18 month old son and one girl on the way from a female who completely f'ed me over.
I ahve a beautiful 7 month old daughter from a male who completely f'ed me over haha. I never forced him to pay any child support and, surprise, I dont get any LOL. Stupid me. But he has no rights either - his choice, not mine. I fought with him until I was blue in the face to play a part in her life and his reply was "just tell her I'm dead"...how mature.
Woman gives birth, takes a year off for maternity leave, man has to work to provide for the baby while the woman receives child tax credit, baby bonus, EI benifits and many other types of help
Yep, I worked 2 jobs for 6 months of my pregnancy .. I think i DESERVE the year off, dont you? I get child tax credit, baby bonus and a little bit of EI, for a grand total of 1100$ a month. Have you ever tried to live off 1100$ a month? If so then you'd know how it's nearly impossible. It's hard enough to support one person on that income, nevermind two, plus all the bottles, diapers, specialties if your baby has allergies (mine is lactose intolerant).
if he dares to do something for himself one weekend, he is labelled a bad father for not spending time with his kids
Not necessarily. I'm sure there will come a time when the mother would like to do something for herself and will ask you to take the child/ren. And as for you complaining about not getting joint custody, I think you need a new lawyer. You have as many rights as you want to have, as long as you're willing to fight for them. Many courts see the mothers more "fit" because WE carried them for 9 months. I didn't see YOU getting fat or throwing up lol. Mind you, the mother is not always the more responsible parent. I know a few that probably shouldn't have their kids, but thats the system for ya.
Now, you wonder why so many men run away from their responsibilties of being a father, it is way to hard on them. Are you f'n kidding me? You're joking right? See I was doing ok with what you had to say until this....what about the mothers who get NO help from family or friends? We dont 'run away'!! I was the only one there when my daughter had strep throat at the tender age of 6 months. I'm the one that wakes up to feed her AT LEAST 4 times a night because she wont eat anything - because of her strep throat. I'm the one that worked my ass off when i was pregnant. How many pregnant people do you know that waddle back and forth to 2 jobs at 8 months pregnant?? Yeah, sounds like you should suck it up tough guy.
A women can smoke, drink and do drugs during pregnancy and a man can do nothing about it.Why cant anything be just about the children? IT IS about the children!! I didn't smoke or do drugs when I was pregnant. I had ONE drink in the first trimester, but that's because I didn't know I was pregnant. After that I stopped.
You complain about not having any rights, or being made out to be a bad father ... blah blah blah. You're bashing moms pretty good and expecting to be praised. BUt just as in any other situation, not all rules apply to everyone. Instead of complaining about what SHOULD be happening, do something about it. If you're scared of being made out to be a bad father, step up to the plate. Spend time with your kid(s), pay your child support....stop whining. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 6:30:55 AM | Obviously I am bitter about my situation yet I have heard a ton of horror stories from other single fathers as well. Dads get a shitty rap and they have to fight for the rights the women already get in court.
You'll hear it from my ex too. A man who has never paid child support, denies that the children are his, and tells everyone I'm a horrible witch who won't let him see his kids.
The only thing I've asked is that he help me out financially, make a regular visitation agreement and stick to it (he wouldn't even agree to 4 hours every second weekend) and take the kids if I'm not able to care for them for medical reasons. His reasonings for not doing it? He won't pay support because I get child tax credit (he also feels that half should go to him no matter if they spend time with him or not because they're half his.....)and that's enough to raise 2 kids on. He denies them because he "wasn't around 24 hours a day to know what I was up to". He also won't take them during medical emergencies because if they happen outside "his time" then they can always go to foster care.
BTW, I agreed to a stay of the visitation agreement while he's attending school in another part of the province, with the conditions that he take them when he's home and that his wife call to set up a time if she wanted to see them. Poor Mr. I-Really-Need-50/50-Joint or his wife haven't even called to talk to the children in a month.
Yet I'M a bad parent...go figure.
My situation in a nutshell, I moved back from Calgary to be with my son after I heard my ex was pregnant, I got a house, I moved her in so she could finish school(we are not together) I was liad off, she receives the Child Tax Credit, I believe this money should go to the baby, not for what ever she chooses- I called the gov. regarding this and they told me that the woman receives this, not the man. Also I was told because she lives with me that this works against me even more. blah, blah, blah...
Alright, I really have to say something to this. The child tax credit that I recieve does not always go completely to the children. You know why? Because I buy the girls what they need when any money comes in. When I get a cheque, I buy groceries, pay bills, buy them clothes, whatever. If I want to buy myself a pair of jeans and go to a movie out of the child tax credit when the girls are with their dad so what? They have what they need (even if it put me out) and it usually equals WAY more than the child tax credit itself.
Its hard to explain everything that happens to a man if you are not a man that has been put through the ringer before.
Just a question, but have you ever looked at the other perspective? It's not easy being a single custodial parent either. I don't understand why NCP's are so down on the other parent and want to refuse to help them, financially or otherwise, just because they aren't getting everything their own way. Just because you don't see your children as much as you like, it doesn't mean that they don't eat. It's immature to begrudge your child anything (even the government help) because you don't get along with the mom.
I really feel for the NCP's who go to court to try and have a better relationship with their child. That's a good reason. To do it out of spite is wrong and there should be a stop to it. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 6:33:07 AM | | I dont anyone gets it......in my own case, I support everyone but me, I dont go out on weekends- the mom does, how can she afford too? ME! thats how. Its the system...not the moms, If I was given enough money to be able to go out and drink on the weekends I may too, but I dont think it should be that way. Everyones situation is different and I have many different issues the way child support works. I have no issue with paying child support if it was supporting my child! ex. A mother gets her rent, food etc payed by her own family and still collects EI and all the other monies and daddy cant see his child because he works 2 jobs to pay his half of the bills? I believe the mother should have to pay her half too, why should she get rewarded for having a family that helps her. Why should the child not be able to see his/her father and bond with them. Im done, y'all dont get it | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 6:40:29 AM | | Your kids have a shitty dad. I do everything for mine and their mother....I just dont think its fair and the system seriously needs adjusting. So i do not believe him and I are in the same boat here. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 6:47:51 AM | Actually, I don't think you get it. You're complaining that men don't get fair treatment in court. Well, joint is there for the taking. If you can prove that you're a responsible parent, then in Canada joint is pretty much assumed. Unless there are extenuating circumstances, of course. I was told that because my ex was fighting for joint, then joint it would be. The only reason he didn't get it was because I was able to prove that he wasn't responsible enough.
<div class="quote">Its the system...not the moms, If I was given enough money to be able to go out and drink on the weekends I may too, but I dont think it should be that way.
That's where your thinking is wrong. Single moms who recieve support are not always partying out of the money. I haven't gone out to a club or a movie in months...my treat is going for a coffee with friends. If your ex is doing this, and you know that your child isn't recieving what he needs,that SHE'S spending HIS money on everything but him, then go to court and prove it. Being angry that she's "better off" than you now doesnt' negate your responsibility to provide for your child.
<div class="quote">I believe the mother should have to pay her half too, why should she get rewarded for having a family that helps her.
What makes you think she isn't? Does he have clothes, food, diapers, etc? Besides, you may have to work two jobs to make ends meet while paying support, but she's the one who has the full-time job of caring for the child.when the child is a little older, isn't she the one who'll have to work, come home with the child, clean the house etc? Have you ever thought of the higher paying jobs that she can't take because of issues with child-care, having to stay home if the child is sick, having to take time off for appointments, etc?
It's all a matter of perspective.
Your kids have a shitty dad. I do everything for mine and their mother....I just dont think its fair and the system seriously needs adjusting. So i do not believe him and I are in the same boat here.
But the same system you're complaining about is giving their shitty dad the benefit of the doubt based on the "fact" that he might change because he says the right things in front of the judge. And you are in the same boat, when it comes to the courts. If you really want joint custody and a reduction in child support because you feel it's best for the child and not because your situation doesn't seem fair then go for it. Remember, you have as much right to the child if you're holding up your end of the responsibilities.
Good luck :D | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 6:52:35 AM | | By the way, I know everything she does because she is living in my house.....I know where all the money goes, out of my pocket and into hers!..lol | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 7:43:28 AM | Wait a sec... I don't get it ...
By the way, I know everything she does because she is living in my house.....
If she's living in your house, how is that not joint custody???
Your coming across wrong, but I hear what your saying about the system being biased... it was a long and interesting journey for this single dad to get custody of the kids. Steps that are automatically provided for women are often not available to men. The ride is long and frustrating, but slowly things are beginning to change. Joint custody is starting to become the norm. Don't take your frustrations out on women tho, its the system that needs be changed, and not always the womans fault that things are often biased in courts and mediation. History has provided that women are the care givers and men the hunter gatherers, takes a while for things like that to change, and lots of guys turn out to be total a$$holes walking away from the kids when things get tough, so the stereotype continues... | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 9:21:50 AM |
I would like to here a story where a women fought to have sole custody and did not get it and why? While I have 2 jobs and I am supporting the mother of my child (who I do not even like)while she finishes school for my sons benefit......my mind is always with my children, this is about the system, not the mothers.
At the very beginning of me break up with my ex, my kids were only nine months old. We had lived together up until that point, knowing each other for about four years. She applied to the court for sole custody and was basically told that the kids need both parents and sometime after that agreed to joint custody because she knew I was doing just as much as her to be a parent... I know there is no way she would have gotten sole custody even if she was persistant.
My kids are now close to 2 and a half yrs old and I have had sole custody now for about four months. Yes, there are a lot of things I left out but every situation is different and you can make your own situation better with time and a lot of effort. I would suggest starting by getting papers filed for joint custody and work your ass off for the next few years if needed, working a job and being the best dad you can with as much of your spare time as you can.
scenario.....
2 people are together, the women gets pregnant and decides she doesnt want to be there anymore and moves 2 hours away to be with her family. When that baby is born, what do you think the mans options are? He has a child already and a job. Does he take paternity leave....nope, he needs to work to support the child he has, not that he wouldnt have to fight like hell to get it anyway. Men are made to be part time dads.
Okay in this scenario the man has a variety of options, but the option that would provide him with the situation in which he could be the best father possible would be to move 2 hrs away to be close to his ex and his child, and get a job in that city/town. Apply to the court in that town for joint custody... and spend as much time visiting with the child as possible. At the same time keep a journal, writing down everything that happens in your life... detailing as much as possible about your child and new things... especially things like first words and first steps. This sort of thing paints a picture that you are a caring parent. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 9:41:44 AM | Firstly,
I know you feel f'ed over and are typing alot out of anger, so naturally, your opinions will come out a bit sexist, bitter, and a bit on the jaded side.
Secondly,
I do not understand your stance on not paying child support. I would assume this is a way to weasle out of it? Maybe I read it wrong. IF you are willing to support a child, and awarded 50% custody, some states dont require child support to be administered because both parents have the child equal amounts of time. Diff laws vary from state to state and country.
Thirdly,
I havent heard of any woman taking a yr. off for maternity leave. The act states 6 wks. for a natural birth-8 wks. for c-section. Any additional time off is at their expense. It isnt "welfare" during those times. It is a state law/act.
Bonus and credits? It goes to the person who has the child. If you were the parent who had the child full-time/custody, this would be awarded to you. Help goes to the parent if they apply, its not a "woman" thing. But, I digress, its a stereotypical thing I suppose.
Nice justification for men to run because its "hard". WAAAAAAAAAH. Being a parent, single parent, NCP, CP is hard all around. But, you grab your balls and take the bull by the horns and do what you got to do. Both adults chose to have sex that resulted in a baby. Both are responsible.
I find it ironic and hypocritical that you have made this rant and talked about it being so hard on the man, and your justifications why men dont pay because its "hard", yet, in another paragraph, you list its BOTH the man and woman's responsibilities? Hmmmmmm. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 9:43:49 AM | Disney mom, in Canada you can take up to a year for parental leave, it can be taken by one parent or split between both however they see fit.
Nice that you would point this out now.
Do you know that THE BOTH OF YOU ARE FRAUDING THE SYSTEM?!
Same system you are complaining about giving her benefits, is giving you the same, since you are living under the same roof.
THE BOTH OF YOU SHOULD BE REPORTED.
I don't think you understand how it works here in Canada... if you're eligible for EI benefits, you get them regardless of how much your partner makes. The Child Tax Credit is for lower income families, you are eligible if your combined incomes are less than, I believe, $26,500. Under that, and it's on a sliding scale. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 9:50:54 AM |
By the way, I know everything she does because she is living in my house.....I know where all the money goes, out of my pocket and into hers!..lol
Nice that you would point this out now.
Do you know that THE BOTH OF YOU ARE FRAUDING THE SYSTEM?!
Same system you are complaining about giving her benefits, is giving you the same, since you are living under the same roof.
THE BOTH OF YOU SHOULD BE REPORTED. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 9:54:20 AM | I didnt know that.
I know that there is family emergency act, that allows up to 4 months I believe, that is without pay.
In the states, its 6 or 8 wks. maternity leave. Is the 1 yr. in Canada paid? WOW. Nice. lol | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 10:29:39 AM | Okay been reading in here.. to the OP.. What your saying does hold some truth.. Upon pregnancy a man holds 0 rights in the determination if the child lives or dies even.. An abortion can be decided upon against the wishes of the prospective father...
Another oddity... Adoption.. Most places that I know of if the woman upon birth decided to give the chil up for adoption they sign off all parental and fincial rights and responsibilities to the child...
The bio dad does have up to like 60 days to claim rights to the child.. If he does exercise those rights he cannot approach mom for any help what so ever in terms of Child Support.. And this has been upheld over and over in the courts..
However the mom, upon birth, and being able to prove a man is bio dad is more then welcome to get CS from him...
Also here in Canada the mat leave is 1 year.. but can only be taken by either the mom or dad.. Not both at the same time.. And the total time may only add up to 1 year.. But the time is auto allocated to the Mom... And in order for Dad to receive EI benefit for the Pat leave... Mom has to give up hers... So in essence if mom decides she doesn't want to work, she is more then willing. But dad is not given the option. | |
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| Justice for the good Fathers!!!
Posted: 12/4/2006 11:31:05 AM | Thank you Spiderham,
Yes Im jaded, yes Im upset. But these types of things mentioned above (plus many more) are the type of laws and rules that get men down. Imagine ladies, if this was switched, If we became pregnant and you wanted the baby, but we decided to abort it. Imagine we didnt have to apy support because we would rather give the baby up for adoption. Many, many problems with this system.......So take it easy on the dads! The good dads! | |
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