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 samantha_lauren
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 1
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why do some men just want a hookup??Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
why is it that all some men want to do is just get in my pants? i say im not looking for a hookup on my profile but some men just dont get it.
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 2
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:18:45 AM
Well, could be something to do with you being a 19 year old hottie. :p

Most guys your age are only interested in one thing.
There are decent guys out there... but, on average, young guys just want sex. They're not interested in finding that special someone.

Just take the time to weed through the losers, until you find yourself a real man.
 ubkobalt
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 3
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:19:41 AM
Because they all say no. And although I haven't tried, I'd assume the success ratio is about the same in the intimate encounters section. So, some just email everyone (or email everyone that they find attactive), and maybe one will say yes.

Just accept is as a way of life, don't let it bother you. If you let it bother you, you'll go insane. Just take it as a compliment that someone is willing to send you such a message, because although this may be annoying, the alternative is far worse.
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 4
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:21:40 AM
Doesn't matter what you put in your profile.

The number one value proposition is the possibility of getting action. Don't forget that we have our mothers to nag at us for other things
 samantha_lauren
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 5
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:25:05 AM
is that all u think about??
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 6
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:27:56 AM
Not me.

But as I said... it's generally the men that are younger (generally 18 to early 20's)...
They have but one thing on their mind. And unfortunately, you are a prime candidate in their eyes.
They don't try to get to know you. They won't try to see how incredible a woman you truly are.
As far as they're concerned, you're an incredibly beautiful young woman... and that means they want to sleep with you.

That's why it's a matter of making sure you truly get to know them. Take the time to talk, and learn about each other.

Any guy who tries to rush things, or tries to push you into doing something you don't want... simply isn't worth your time.
Unless they can respect you and your wishes... then ditch them.
 samantha_lauren
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 7
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:29:55 AM
about time someone saine is on here.
 ubkobalt
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 8
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:37:02 AM
is that all u think about??


Ok, that's not fair at all. You think men only have one thing on our minds?

I think about plenty of other things.

Such as what I'm going to eat for lunch a few hours from now.And "Why did I leave the heater on when I left the house?"

And hey, maybe finding a decent girlfriend to keep around.

But yes, it's on men's minds quite often. Especially if it's not happening. AND THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS BECAUSE IT'S THE WAY WE'RE DESIGNED TO BE! Anyone with good manners about the whole thing is simply being dishonest or has an honestly low libido. At least with the sex hounds, you get some honesty from them.

Be glad that they're being honest for now. Later in life, when they realize that honesty doesn't work, it'll take more effort on your part to figure out who's telling the truth, and who isn't, and then you'll be passing up the honest ones thinking that they're being insincere.
Haven't you realized, that "good mannered" is quite often the same as "dishonest"? Not always, but quite often.

Besides, women don't seem to think about it enough. Someone has to balance the power around here.
 YEAIDD
Joined: 4/7/2006
Msg: 9
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:41:54 AM
Adam hit it once again....at 19, get use to it...the substance is going to be a needle in a haystack for another 6-10 years.
 samantha_lauren
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 10
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:44:25 AM
there has gotta be more men out there that are a little more mature than that and dont keep thinking about when there next bootycall is gonna be???? i know guys think about it all the time but you would like to think some guys are respectable enough to keep it to themselves.
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 11
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 8:56:00 AM

i know guys think about it all the time but you would like to think some guys are respectable enough to keep it to themselves.


That's a catch 22 ... if we keep it to ourselves, we'll never get any action. Just dwindle down to the friend that has to be there and listen to all the whining ...
 Absolutemike
Joined: 1/16/2006
Msg: 12
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 9:39:21 AM
Well I hate to be a devils advocate but...your on an free online dating site, there is gonna be a lot of guys like that...but I wont complain I need them, they make me look good lol

Good luck nontheless!
 strangebloom
Joined: 6/30/2005
Msg: 13
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 10:06:14 AM
Samantha,

Not 'all' guys are any one way.

Try taking a bit more time to get to know a person. Make it clear that you like to get to know a guy well before sleeping together, and then you should see some of the players disappear.

Good luck. There is some cool dude out there for you. :)
 Adam Taylor
Joined: 5/11/2006
Msg: 14
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/4/2006 11:33:01 AM
Samantha, I'm sure there are some decent guys your age running about. Though, you'd figure most of them would have been snatched up by someone by now. ;)

Just take your time... get to know them... and don't rush into anything...
You deserve someone amazing, and in time, you'll find him.
 samantha_lauren
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 15
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 6:31:49 AM
aww thanx. thats really sweet
 DyfRynt
Joined: 11/11/2006
Msg: 16
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 9:02:32 AM
Getting past the stereotypes, the simple biological truth is that men prefer the physical part of the relationship to be first, and the emotional connection second.

For women it is the opposite. They need the emotional connection first to be comfortable with the physical. So I think you might be wrong that all men want is to ONLY get in your pants. Your age is working against you here, as, if you are dating guys your own age, they can be rather immature (which means that getting into your pants really is all they are after).

There are women who just want a good lay, and really don't care about going any further. And there are guys who do want an emotional connection as much as the physical.

The trick is to find the ones who do want a complete relationship. This has as much to do with you and your choices, as it does with the guys. If the jocks, the bad boys, the super cute men are the only ones you are attracted to, you are unlikely to find what you are looking for.
 Sid Valleyview
Joined: 9/4/2006
Msg: 17
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 3:39:09 PM
Plenty of women would want to hookup as well. But of course, they are more discreet about it. Just like you want guys to be. Guys your age are about as subtle as a brick! as you would know. Because there are girls out there that are receptive to this, they continue to be so. It wouldn't be until they see something they really really want, that they actually pull back on the reigns, because they don't want to blow it. Maturity doesn't come naturally, it's learnt. So if you find a guy your age, with the maturity your looking for, you might want to consider keeping him around. Just don't smother him
 DentedKnight
Joined: 7/7/2005
Msg: 18
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 4:54:44 PM
Sam: At your age, the ones that don't just want a booty call are um, studying? Or going to the movies with thier girl and then a walk to the coffee shop for a hot chocolate before taking her home and getting some studying in.

Yeah, they are kinda hard to find. But try the lunch room, or cafeteria. Look for the guy that is sitting with a bunch of guys, but is on the outside edge of the conversation. Not needing to control it, or be the clown, or always get a word in. But not socially ostracized and sitting alone (Unless it's with a good book). That's the guy to talk to. Or remember how he acts so you can recognize that kind of guy somewhere else.

That's the guy that will give you a better shot at something stable.

That or you could go for the class clown.

Sooner or later, you will get him.
 Fireand Ice
Joined: 11/27/2006
Msg: 19
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 4:55:35 PM
Because they do.. and quite frankly... so do women...

Its the year 2006... almost everything discussed on these boards aren't gender specific.

wanting sex isn't evil.... its just a matter if you want it or not...
I can appreciate wanting sex for a more noble purpose... but one cant be really surprised that the internet has brought the trolls from the clubs... to your living room.

Do your best to find hope that the one you seek is there in waiting.
 KiteGuy321
Joined: 3/21/2006
Msg: 20
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 4:59:48 PM

there has gotta be more men out there that are a little more mature than that and dont keep thinking about when there next bootycall is gonna be????


There are, but they are in their mid-20s and early 30s... at 19, you're only thinking about:

1. sex with girls
2. how cool it would be to get drunk and have sex with girls
3. what kind of car you should have so you can have sex with girls
4. sex with girls
 rcuhljr
Joined: 10/4/2006
Msg: 21
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 5:05:11 PM
Luckily once you hit 21 you can drink legally and realize why the term moderation exists. then you are only interested in

1. sex with girls
2. sex with girls
3. what kind of car you should have so you can have sex with girls
4. sex with girls

 genuine_me77
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 22
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 7:13:22 PM
there has gotta be more men out there that are a little more mature than that and dont keep thinking about when there next bootycall is gonna be???? i know guys think about it all the time but you would like to think some guys are respectable enough to keep it to themselves.


Sure, those guys are out there, and you've probably met a few your own age. But they're not the attractive dudes, definately not the popular athletes, and not the guys who throw the great parties with lots of beer. The're probably the quiet dorks who help do community service projects, organize canned food drives for the honor society, or run the lights for the amateur theater company in town. Find the guy who wants to be appreciated for who he is, and what he can become... because those are the guys who're looking at everyone else in the same light, to appreciate a woman for who she is, and who she'll be someday. Of course, it's much easier to find a guy at your age who is worried about his appearance, who caves in to peer pressure, and who needs to be accepted by the mob mentality... and that's all he's looking for in a mate; nothing concrete, and something that changes on an hourly basis.

For myself, I've gone without sex for a while now, and have turned several chances to end the "dry streak." But because sex is more than just a physical activity, I'm still waiting for someone I've connected with, not just someone who thinks I'm kinda cute while she's drunk.
 hippychick29
Joined: 9/30/2006
Msg: 23
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 8:22:59 PM

Well, could be something to do with you being a 19 year old hottie. :p


Honey, at 19 you don't need to be worrying about what any man thinks!! Just go out and live your life before looking for that one guy. And don't worry about the "horndogs" out there. Just ignore them or tell them no.
There will be time enough to settle down!

~k~
 lucidness
Joined: 10/21/2006
Msg: 24
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why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 8:27:33 PM
Men like vaginas, sometimes some men would like to be with a vagina without the "hassle" of a relationship. I personally don't sleep with just anyone unless I am dating them.
 AAARRG!
Joined: 8/21/2006
Msg: 25
why do some men just want a hookup??
Posted: 12/5/2006 9:02:51 PM
You would probably be better off asking some older women you know in real life than asking that on here.

The real answer is: Men do what men do.

Not every single guy will act this way, but all of us think this way. There are some who play out that whole "sensitive" guy thing, and maybe they don't "hookup" because they're waiting for Ms. Right, but the fact is they wouldn't mind hooking up with the one that they "thought" was Ms. Right, an hour after they met her.

I'm not buying that whole "it's only the young guys in their 20's who do this". Have a hot 19 year old chick put on her profile that she's looking for true love with a man in his 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's, whatever, youd have so many emails you couldn't even read them all.

Some will come out and tell you what they want. Some will try to be the nice guy and try to convince you that he is what you want. But, the bottom line is, all of them want to f*ck you. Guys want to drive it around the block a couple times before we can make an informed decision about taking it home.

Read the forums, try to find some good info. But don't take this sh!t as gospel, just learn what you like and what you dislike. When people email you and you don't like the subject of it, delete it, and forgetaboutit. When you come on the forums and ask such a basic question of biology expect more emails.

-News Flash- Women do the exact same thing. They may have different tactics, but it's the same game. If no woman ever gave it up on the spot, then guys would realize they need to change the game or at least try a different game. But the fact is, alot of women want a date to try to find Mr. Right, but end up going for a hookup with Mr. Rightnow. Aside from a guy raping a women, the only way a guy gets any putang at all is because the women says yes.

It's just the way the world works. Learn it. Live it. Love it.


P.S. Once I thought I found Ms. Right.

I just didn't realize her first name was Always.
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