| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 10:55:37 AM | It's only been seven days after my ex broke up with me and she's going to another dude's house for the second time!
She says she still loves me!
BUT WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING?
She says she wants to be friends but then she goes and does this?? why is she doing this to me? she knows i don't like her to go there!
Can some one please tell me what the hell is going on here?? | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 10:59:18 AM |
she knows i don't like her to go there! I can certainly understand why she broke up with you... that's just a little too controlling for anyone's peace of mind.
And really, you are on a dating site listing yourself as single... is it any of your business what she does with anyone else? Oh... and you joined almost three months ago... real dedication to the relationship you had with her...  | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:04:02 AM | Hallet12:You stated that she says that she still loves you and is going to another guy's house? Hun, I believe it's called being a "Skank".
It seems that she's purposefully doing this to drive you crazy. My dear, don't give her the satisfaction! You need to move on. You deserve better! 
Concentrate on your education, starting a career, friends, family, going out and having some good, clean fun (Dancing, Christmas Parties, etc).
You're so young! Enjoy! Relax! Have FUN!
Season's Greetings!  | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:04:11 AM | You need to follow the NO CONTACT guide. Stressing out over what she is doing isn't going to help you. In fact, it's going to cause you much, much more harm. It doesn't matter what she is doing right now. What matters is YOU and healing.
Do you see why NO CONTACT is important? Stop checking up on her or asking what she is up to. It's going to destroy your healing. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:15:54 AM | Im not on a dating site to meet girlfriends, i like to meet NEW people thats all.
Also i wasn't controlling at all, i told her my feelings....
Last..
She was the one who wanted to be friends with me....
This is driving me crazy, she swears up and down she don't want this dude but maybe it's my own mistrust at this time that thinks she will do somthing. I dunno if i can do the whole no contact thing, she keeps doing things that make it seem as if she still wants me around...
Like..
Coffie yesterday, we hung out for hours yesterday at Tim Hortons talking...?
She calls me every night before she goes to bed...
Im just so confused by this whole situation! | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:31:44 AM | it's not mistrust if she's going by herself to another guy's place.
you need to follow the above advice: NO contact. it's the hardest thing to do, but it's what you need.
she's playing you. she's keeping you around b/c she knows you're a sure thing. sorry to say it, but it's true. it's happened to me, it's happened to others, and it'll happen again. if she really loved you, she wouldn't f**k with your head like that, and that's what she's doing. she's being an incredibly selfish person who's out enjoying herself and keeping you around. LOSE all contact with her. phone, in person, email, text, etc. maybe she'll come around, maybe she won't. for now, it's not worth it. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:31:55 AM | Am i beyond help with this or ....
Just so many things are messed up and it's getting the best of me...
It's starting to sink in my head now, but in the back of my mind i think there is somthing i can do to right this! | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:34:47 AM |
Also i wasn't controlling at all, i told her my feelings....
Stop that.
She was the one who wanted to be friends with me....
NO! You can not be "friends" with someone you are in love with. It's going to destroy your confidence and self-esteem.
This is driving me crazy, she swears up and down she don't want this dude but maybe it's my own mistrust at this time that thinks she will do somthing. I dunno if i can do the whole no contact thing, she keeps doing things that make it seem as if she still wants me around...
She's holding you on a string....
Coffie yesterday, we hung out for hours yesterday at Tim Hortons talking...?
Stop hanging out with her!
She calls me every night before she goes to bed...
No contact means NO CONTACT. Stop taking the calls. You're becoming her lap-dog.
Im just so confused by this whole situation!
Do you want things to become clear? Implement NC immediately and focus on yourself. Stop worrying about what she is doing, who she is seeing, etc. None of that matters right now. What is important here is you getting your head back on straight, rebuilding your confidence and self-esteem and getting back on track.
She's never going to miss you or understand what you had as long as you keep meeting her needs while yours are not being met in the process.
Stop it. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:57:11 AM | Im starting to think your right man, im giving up all hope that i can fix this problem. She is being really selfish right now and not giving a shit how i feel, only caring about herself which i should do too....
It's really hard to stop worrying about her, i wanna be there for her so bad....
But your right...all of you..
I gotta do things for myself now, it's all i got, i need to let go....
As for confidence and self esteem, i am not really sure if i have any of that left...i tryed so hard to make things right and she is only giving a damn about herself and not hearing a word that i say to her....
Im gonna stop takin calls, im gonna stop makin em'
She's already done all she can do to me and..i am really done trying.... | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:59:21 AM | READ NO MORE MR NICE GUY.
Read it now.
Don't delay.
Don't say a WORD to her or talk to her until you've finished the book.
Do it.
Do it now.
Don't wait. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 12:09:00 PM | | You should really pay attention to what jarbarian is trying to tell you! Read the book, the forum, the advice given here...it is good advice... | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 12:32:27 PM | she's just keeping you on the stringer while she figures out whether this other guy is a "better deal." YOU are "plan B". She was probably lining up on this new guy BEFORE she "broke up"with you. Apparently she did have ONE scruple left,against flat out CHEATING on you. Technically she's not cheating, but if she keeps calling you and telling you she loves you, the "break up" was just a technicality. She's gonna keep you dangling just in case this new guy doesn't work out.
I see women pull this crap ALL the time, because they are afraid of not having a boyfriend, but they want to keep shopping for something better. I think it's disgusting, it makes us ALL look bad. If you let her pull stuff like this, you are going to be confused and unhappy A LOT.
My advice would be to cease contact, forget this gal and move on.
You are being played, BIG TIME.
Sorry dude.
Cindy O | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 12:58:11 PM | Well,
Im not hanging from her string anymore, im cutting off all contact with this girl....i care..she don't...
Then i say to myself..
Why the hell should i care? if she don't?
Sooooo with that said, im gonna re-read my first topic i posted and take everyones advice to heart to benifit me...it's all about me now..
Im not getting played no more, im done with her games.....
Hows that for confidence so far? | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 2:07:58 PM | | She sounds indecisive and immature. Why would you want someone who is wishy washy? She is playing games and you are feeding her drama and she is enjoying it. Be glad you did't put any more effort into it. Cut your losses and be glad you are not the next guy. .. the Part about "being friends" - Actions speak louder than words. She doesn't seem much of a "friend" to you so be glad you are not still in a relationship with her. WIth friends like this, who needs enemies?? Just because she calls you doesn't mean you have to answer the call. After all, that is what caller ID is for. Good Luck to you. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 2:15:25 PM | It's going to be hard but it's somthing i gotta do for myself.
I know now that i should have listened to what people told me at first, it really didn't help with my healing...
What i was doing that is....
Now im becomming wise to her games and im gonna work through this, i do wish it didn't have to end like this....
I continue to ask myself why? | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 2:22:11 PM | well i am defenetly like that your moving on trust me it will* help you in the long run..it takes time..it and enemy but it also may help...dont let her do that to you...and you know something dont let her ruin it for the rest of them other girls out there..i am very pleased that you are thinking clearer now..it suits you know..enjoy life like one lady said on here..you are young, and your only young once..,,ONCE....have fun in a healthy way..come on you know what i'm talking about..lol..take good care alright..mean what you say..and say what you mean..lol....none of this.. ...more of this... ...then you will feel this.. ...lol..have a good life ok.."con mucho carino...Zayin.. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 2:24:50 PM | I think this is a good example of the difference between when men and women cheat or break up and start dating other ppl.
Sometimes men will cheat because they want to have sex with another woman, despite how they feel about their girl friend. I'm not saying its right, but when men do cheat or break up and see other ppl, they are more about making themselves happy than making their girlfriend misrable. I feel aweful if I hurt someones feeling because of something I do.
Women will cheat because they think they can benifit more from another man. Often times they like to throw this back in the face of their ex. Like calling them and telling them about their current prospect.
I think your ex probably does have feelings for you this is why see is stringing you along., but see doesn't know what see wants. She is only looking out for her own interests.
Don't let it bother you so much and find someone else. | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 2:27:51 PM | | we all ask ourselves why,what did i do wrong? Is there something i could have done for the outcome to have been different? The truth is regardless of how u feel,if the other person doesn't feel the same way nothing you say or do is going to change the outcome. The best thing to do is to try to move on and look at it all as a learning experience. It's hard to let go,but if u dont ur just going to make urself crazy! | |
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| Seven days after a break up! WHAT THE HELL
Posted: 12/7/2006 2:29:31 PM | Halletti,
I feel bad for you and hope it works out for you, she must be someone like the writer Psssst, she needs a attitude adjustment, I bet she is real ugly thats why she hates men.
She has never had a man she could dump. Psssst, enjoy your life alone or should I say ugly where do you get off writing that kind of stuff. You are a real | |
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