| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 12:15:20 AM | I am 4 months pregnant, the father is not involved and never will be. It is a long story, however I am still a great person. I am not completely jaded about men. I am still going to school full time. I run my at home business, writing articles for web designers and designing my own. I would love to meet a guy who I can date. Does it really freak a guy out to date a pregnant chick. I am not looking for a father for this baby, I am looking for a guy for me. Is it better to wait till the baby is born, then I am just a single mom who works and goes to school?
I also feel embarrassed to even be on this website due to being pregnant. Most guys are not looking for a premade bun in the oven so to speak. I have dated men with children, I guess it is different for women we are natural nurtures.
I would like positive feedback, I get enough of the negative crap, honestly it solves nothing. I am a god fearing woman, thus the reason I am carrying this child, I do not believe in abortion. I look forward to hearing from you all. | |
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Blit|
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Joined: 8/1/2006
Msg: 2 | |
| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 12:20:18 AM | I wouldn't see a problem dating a pregnant woman. Some guys could not handle that especialy having to think he will have to take care of your kid and such. It can be scary to some guys.
There is surely someone who would date you. You just might be looking at the wrong people. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 2:12:18 AM | I'm baffled by your statements.
You want only positive feedback however your situation does not inspire merely positve comments. You state, "I am a god fearing woman"; usually God fearing women don't get pregnant out of wedlock.
What are your plans for the child? I hope you're considering adoption; there are a great deal of loving, childless couples that could provide a happy two parent home for your baby.
The fact that you do not believe in abortion is not a good enough reason to parent this child.
With all that you have going on in your life right now it does not appear that you'd have much time for dating. Please do some studying and soul searching on what is best for the child and you too. It will be extremely difficult to work, study and parent an infant.
I wish you and your baby the best. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 2:18:43 AM | Look at it this way, someone that isn't pregnant doesn't have the potential for the drama someone that is pregnant may have. It's easy to say "he's in involved and never will be" but really, I can say I'm Superman, doesn't mean it's true.
Instead of doing what most women in your situation seem to do, look at it the other way. In terms of free time, drama, hell pretty much any factor single > divorced > kids > pregnant. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 2:23:15 AM | OP...thedra is exactly who you don't want to become. Bitter, party of one.
You seem logical, I don't get the sense that you are hiding behind this. I'm not sure exactly how it would make a guy feel but all you can do is the best that you can...
What I do know is that you don't have to give your child up for adoption for lack of a man. Don't ever let anyone tell you that. Circumstances will hardly serve as more than excuses when you look back on your life but if you listen to your instincts, your heart and your conscience you won't have much room for regret.
 I hope you find someone | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 2:41:54 AM | | To beach_babe21: Some guys will, some guys won't........I would. Guess I'm old enough to know its not the babys fault and I do think that your stand on abortion is a great thing. As long as you are upfront about it, go for it. If a guy rejects you because of it, you don't want him anyway. Just need to find the right one. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 3:13:45 AM | My first instinct is to say no. There are a few very good reasons not to. On the other hand every situation is different and maybe there is an up side.
This question can not be simply answered with a yes or no.
I'm sorry but that's the best answer I can give. Good luck! | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 4:02:57 AM | I totally agree with 907daydreamer on this one..... don't ever consider adoption just because your a single mother.... what a ridiculas thing to think in this day and age thedra.........
BUT,with you being pregnant at the moment... your emotions are going to go up and down all the time and for a while after the birth,it really is not wise to be looking for a new partner whilst being pregnant,it wouldn't be fair on you or the new man.....
best of luck to you and the baby,and hey being a single mum will not stop your chances of finding the right man... again good luck. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 5:48:22 AM | | ONLY IFI IMPREGNATED HER SORRY BUT JUST BEING REALLLLLLLLLLL.... CUZ IN A MANS PERSPECTIVE YOU SHOULDNT BE OUT LOOKIN FOR A MAN BEIN KNOCKED UP ... THATS OBVIOSLY DIDNT WORK SO JUST FOCUS ON THE BABY N YOUR HEALTH ,, YOU DONT NEED THE STRESS WHILE CARRYING A BABY INSIDE ,, ITLL JUST BECOME THE UNBORNS STRESSN DRAMA AS WELL... WORRY ABOUT THE FUTURE OF THE CHILD BY ACCETIN YOUR TERM YOU MUST COME TO TERMS W IT TOO N REALISE YOUR ESSENCE OF BEING IS PAST IN THAT SENSE ,, WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 5:50:42 AM | Do you have any idea of how hard it is to date someone with an infant baby to take care of ?
I tried it once and it's not easy.
OK, maby you can find a single guy who really wants to jump into child rearing. Perhaps you can find a guy with kids of his own.
But for practical purposes almost all single men, with no children of their own, will back off pretty quick.
There is no such thing as, the fathers not involved.
He may be out of sight now, but he will be .
I don't care what anyone says now.
I'm sorry, but the hard facts of this is that you should put the whole idea of dating and romance out of your mind until your child is at least a year old, maby longer than that.
Oh yea, I know, I sound cruel and unsympathetic. Guys are gonna come on here and tell us all about how they would love to date a new mother.
Just wait and see if they really give it a try. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 5:59:00 AM | nipoleon, you are an absoulte legend, I couldn't agree with you more.
The other night I had a huge debate on the forums about dating single mums, I wish you were logged on at the time to back me up, I got absolutely bombarded with people lashing out at me.
Good to see another guy who sees it as it is. | |
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e-wok
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Joined: 9/25/2006
Msg: 14 | |
| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 5:59:55 AM | If the father is no longer in the picture then it would mean
100% of the financial burden will fall on your shoulders and
the man that might commit to you? OMG.
Do you understand the cost in raising a child? Any clue? My
friends are paying $750/month for daycare ALONE...this whole
dating thing will boil down to one question for the guy: Do I have $180k to spare
to raise another persons baby or is there someone out there that I
can raise a family with together?
Do yourself a favour; find him, and make him pay child support because your chance of
dating is increase 20 fold when the father supports his own child rather than
shouldering that burden/responsibility on another man.
You need to face the reality of your situation. | |
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Dezoe
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Joined: 12/15/2006
Msg: 17 | |
| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 6:29:47 AM | | I'd have to agree with ewok on this one....the first year of your babies life is going to be difficult, especially if oyu have to do it alone...you have to think now that every relationship you will be in now for the rest of your life will be scrutinized by innocent eyes, so choose your mates wisely...her father figure is not in the picture, so every man you bring into her life will be that father figure....i have a six year old daughter, and i have not been with her mother since she was just over a year old. I make sure that if im dating someone they know about my daughter and that she is priority number one in my life. its difficult for some people to understand but i find that for the most part, its not a big deal.(maybe i'm just that sexy.) and another thing, the wait for me to introduce my daughter is usually six months......i've only been in two long term relationships in five years, and both exes keep in contact with my baby...my last girlfriend actually had her down in november for a weekend..(she lives in sudbury, i lived in the falls....its quite the drive.) so remember, when you do start dating again, and i suggest it be after the baby is born, (gonna need that time to bond) dont feel like you have to take the first person to come along...pick and choose...be picky....youre looking out for two now..... | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 9:33:59 AM | OP,
No I don't believe I'd date a pregnant woman for a number of reasons. May I advise that you yourself may need to not date and instead focus on what changes in your life are about to occur? A child is a huge responsibility if you want to care for it properly and give it the best quality of life possible your going to make HUGE sacrafices in your own life and if your not careful it could be more than your willing to give up and I say this cause no parent should resent their child. Your in a very precarious position and adding someone else to the mix is going to help very little.
I'm Pro-Choice myself and respect your beliefs about abortion and the hard road you have ahead of you but you really do need to sit down and look at the big picture of what you expect with and without a child.
Your situation goes much further than worrying about finding a date.
@907daydreamer
Wow... classic ****y-ness. She brings up a valid option for both the well-being of this young lady and the child she carries. She didn't say she had too, she didn't scream that without a man she couldn't dare raise a child.
I dare say myself that for someone that seemingly preaches the rights and advancement of women for you to denounce an option that so many women have chosen and will go on choosing as the best course for themselves and their children is kind of hypocritical. Your advocating just the opposite position Thedra was only your just taking a different position on what she should feel guilty about.
It's her choice to make and at the end of the day the only person that can judge her is herself. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 9:56:34 AM | I think after the baby is born, your views on things may change. You will probably want a guy who is a father for the baby too, not just a guy for you? The baby, after all, IS you and will be so important for you, hopefully above all else.
Here's hoping for you and the baby to find what you seek. And to having a Healthy Happy Baby! Good Luck and Godspeed! | |
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Dezoe
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Joined: 12/15/2006
Msg: 21 | |
| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 10:14:58 AM | | i dont think adoption was even considered an option in this situation.....obviously this woman is willing to have this baby and do anything she can to provide for the child...she seems to be an intelligent woman who has direction in her life, with a tiny twist.....to insinuate adoption is the best option for this child is insulting to me as a single parent....does a child need an in-house two parent family to be happy? I dont think they do....Is this woman going to be looking for a father of her child? i think its human nature to want a partner to help with a child....There are plenty of men out there who are willing to date pregnant women or women with children already.....i'm one of them... | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 1:20:48 PM | Absolutely..I'd date a pregnant woman. After all, you know she puts out. LOL
Seriously, sex doesn't always have to be invloved with a date. Some times just going out for a good time is more fun. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 1:37:04 PM | Nurgle161...this woman didn't ask us to give her advice on what to do with her...HER...child. Thedra stuck her nose in where it doesn't belong. "I hope you're considering adoption. God fearing women don't get pregnant out of wedlock. There are many two-parent homes that could raise your child." Not our effing business.
*excuse me while I compose myself*
I don't' recall being an advocate for or against women's rights in this forum or any other. Nor do I recall inflicting any guilt on the OP. I told her to listen to her conscience. Do what she feels is best for her and her child, they are the only people who will be forced to live with her decisions. Thedra said that the OPs stance on abortion wasn't a good enough reason to consider raising a child on her own, I offered the opinion that her current relationship status isn't a good enough reason to give a child up for adoption either. My Mom was 2 months pregnant when my Dad left...she didn't get married until I was 10. She put herself through college and worked full time and she is a better person for it now. Don't tell me it can't be done.
It's her choice to make and at the end of the day the only person that can judge her is herself.
my point exactly. weird.
b!tch...meh, I can live with that. | |
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| Would you date a woman who is pregnant?
Posted: 1/3/2007 6:00:50 PM | I guess I didn't make my point very clear, I do not want to date a man while being pregnant. MY POINT is there is such a huge difference between a single mom and a woman who is pregnant. As for the guy it was a stupid night I passed out and well woke up with fewer clothes than I had originally went to sleep in. The guy is a coke head loser who does not deserve to be near my baby. I am smart, and I have a plan. For the lady that said I should give my baby up for adoption obviously you have never carried a child. To have a bond with a child and give it up, Is the cruelest thing I have ever heard. I am not a quitter.
As of now I have been pretty good with emotions I am not a dramatic type of person. Thanks for the supporters, it didn't turn into a complete jerry springer reply. I was just curious, seemed a little different than the usual comment on does he love me does he not.
I am a full time student I work from home and will continue on. I love the comments I have received and men please don't worry this little filly is not in the market, I am far from finding a man right now.
And ladies, notice how these guys react to this topic it gives good insight to their judgements, it is just a question not a proposal or a ball and chain....ever heard of being friends. I am after all human! | |
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