| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/9/2007 10:30:22 AM | On the radio this morning they were discussing how married couples decide if one parent should stay home with the child/ren and the other one continues working, and the cost of daycare should both parents decide or need to work to maintain their house payments, vacations, etc... and how if both work one in essence works to pay for daycare as it costs A LOT (as we all know.)
They were discussing about where does one draw the line with wanting a bigger house, an extra vacation a year or a bigger more expensive car. Going on about how children don't need a vacation at March Break what they need is their parents active in their lives... etc... ( I presume for the money driven)
What got me was that these people HAVE an option to choose to stay home with their children where SINGLE PARENTS DON'T have such an option... let alone the luxury of a vacation period. Now I'm not saying that life is harder or eaiser.. I guess it all comes down to where ones priorities lie.
What are your opinions on the issue? | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/9/2007 10:48:37 AM | In the province of Qubec the Daycare System is provincial and open to every single person. There is no basis on how much you make to decide if you are eligible for Subsidy. Simply if you wish to access it, you pay a small user fee. And the fee is the same across the board.
I personally don't see why in allot of way a Single Parent should get preferential treatment in terms of Daycare Spots, or funding over Married 2 income. Or Married Single Income families..
I support one parent staying at home with the over the use of Daycare. However at the same point, I also think that people should be given the option, and that Income should be a qualifying factor in the issue.
We have Universal Health Care in Canada. Meaning simply due to your income you are not put further down the list for treatment then someone with money. So why should things like Child Care be any different.
And as far as a Single Parents not having an option to stay at home. Well to me thats a moot point. Why should we as single parents be treated any different for our choices then those of Married people.
If anything, I think we should be offering more in the way of Tax Breaks to families that have a parent stay home. Income splitting makes allot of sense to me in this regard. If you offer incentives for this happen. People might choose to stay at home with their kids... And thus open up more spots for Single Parents in the Day Care System. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/9/2007 12:48:36 PM | I think this thread links in nicely with the "Proud to be a Single Parent" thread.
Once again we're of the same thinking Spider.
Single parents, you don't wear your single parentness like a badge of honour then complain because you have it harder than married couples.
You've made choices in your life.......suck it up. You had options, you chose a path, don't whine when others have more choices later in life because they made different choices. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/9/2007 12:59:47 PM | | single parents have just as much of a choice as dual parent families ... its all in the choices you make. Be it working at home or holidays .... you always have a choice .. its a matter of if you make the decision of choice | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/9/2007 1:27:18 PM | Each family is different. Each parent(s) is different. Bills come and go, kids are only kids for a short period of time. Do I work? Yes. I am home when my boys come home from school thankfully. Do we take elaborate vacations? No. It's not that I couldn't budget for it, but we'd rather have hockey season paid for (2 kids is expensive), karate, Lacrosse, Ballhockey, private Human Service worker for my youngest son, summer day camp, swimming lessons, it all adds up. We go to movies, to dinner, we spread our 'vacation' funds all year. I am contented with what I have, as are my children.
It is our choice and we make do with what we have. I guess for us, it's being happy with what we've got. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/10/2007 5:53:33 AM | Having been a daycare owner and provider and now a single parent who is with her kids (while earning an income), I can say that daycare expenses are a difficult issue no matter what the family configuration.
And even though daycare expenses are challenging to any family, those providing care are still underpaid and undervalued. I was surprised at how many clients it took to actually make a profit. In my earlier providing years, I expected that watching a child = profit. That was naive and absolutely not the case. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/10/2007 7:04:28 AM | Funny enough, my GF and I were discussing this just the other night. She and her husband have 3 kids, two incomes. She said her salary went primarily to pay the daycare, plus a little left over for *coffee fund*. I'm a single parent, 2 kids... and thankfully I qualify for subsidy for care otherwise I'd be living on the street because the cost of full-fee care for my two kids is about $1400 a month. Ridiculous if you think about it. At one point last year I was seriously considering applying for welfare and staying at home with the kids because I was looking for work and not able to find anything that paid decent wages that fit into what I felt necessary as far as scheduling and our lives were concerned. I know a lot of single parents work shifts, retail, etc with no problems... the ones I know of tho have always had LOADS of help from friends, neighbors, other family members in order to be able to do those jobs. I get virtually NO help from my family so those types of jobs aren't something I could consider (altho I got many offers to work retail!!).
We're good now... money is still tight, and really I'm the only one to blame on that and I take full responsibility for it. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/14/2007 10:26:44 PM |
these people HAVE an option to choose to stay home with their children where SINGLE PARENTS DON'T have such an option... let alone the luxury of a vacation period. Now I'm not saying that life is harder or eaiser.. I guess it all comes down to where ones priorities lie.
I'm a single parent, and I have whatever options I choose to have.
I work from home and have no daycare costs.
What gets me is when parents who are part of a couple, who have help from family, or whose children go for weekend vists with the other parent, complain about needing a break. Or the people who have their children for a couple of weekends per month and call themselves single parents. 
But I do have the option to hire a sitter and go out.
There are pros and cons no matter what our lot in life is. We can always find something to complain about, but we also always have options. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/15/2007 5:38:34 PM |
these people HAVE an option to choose to stay home with their children where SINGLE PARENTS DON'T have such an option... let alone the luxury of a vacation period. Now I'm not saying that life is harder or eaiser.. I guess it all comes down to where ones priorities lie.
Let me start by saying I have been in both situations. I have been a full time working mother while my husband also worked and both children went to daycare. Since we divorced, I have become a single full time working mother. When I was married and we both worked, we DID NOT have the option for me or him to stay home. Neither one of us made enough money to solely support the family. And we did not have the luxury of fancy vacations. We did not live in an expensive house or drive nice cars. We simply both worked to feed, house and clothe the children. It is a myth that all dual income families have a large disposable income and work because they put money before their children.
With that being said, if I was still paying for two in day care, I simply would not make it financially with only my income. The child support my ex is paying me currently is just enough to cover the daycare bill for the one still in daycare. That allows me to work to supprt the children. I am not whining and crying because it is so hard being a single mom. I chose this likfe when I filed for divorce. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/15/2007 5:52:12 PM |
When I was married and we both worked, we DID NOT have the option for me or him to stay home. Neither one of us made enough money to solely support the family.
My question when I hear people say things like this I don't quite understand. When you were working I'm willing to bet the amount of money you made was essentially enough to pay for Daycare expenses... and maybe a couple extra hundred a month.
When people tell me both parents had to work in order to support the family I sometimes question as to why? I know a guy who has 2 kids, works in a Whare House making something like 15-16 per hour.
They live in a decent home, drive a nice van, are even able to have a night out a couple times a month. Yet she doesn't work. Has 0 income from any source. And I questioned him 1 time how he is able to do it.
His simple answer, his wife was a wiz with money. And he works the odd weekend when overtime comes up. Does a few odd jobs in helping out buddies here and there.. He also told me when they looked into things, essentially she would of made about 200 more a month then what the daycare costs would be.
So for the less stress of them both working.. They simply elected for her to stay at home. And for the record he does live in the city of Vancouver. One of the most expensive cities in Canada to live...
So when I hear about 2 parents home... Both having to work... I really start to wonder if it had more to do with the desire to work then actually needing the income. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/15/2007 6:16:25 PM | Neither his or my income was enought to make the house payment and pay all the bills. Very simple.
While I know some people choose to work when they have the option to stay home, that was not the case with us.
However, if both parents choose to work, I really don't see the problem with it as long as their children are taken care of and they spend quality time with the children each day. | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/13/2008 2:21:32 AM | | excuse me..... since when has a widow made the choice to be a widow...are you not aware that there are many types of single parents... and what about the mums coming out of abusive relationships.... I AM PROUD TO BE A SINGLE PARENT. ....I am proud of the fact that I eventually found the strength to get out of my abusive marriage....I was also brought up in a single parent family.. my father DIED at the age of 41...after a long illness....do you really think my mum would have wanted that....certainly wasn't her choice. I am from the UK...and we get a raw deal over here too.... | |
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| Double income families complaining about childcare expenses
Posted: 1/13/2008 4:28:54 PM | | So true,my ex complaining about taking off work for taking my son to his Dr. appts. and school meetings yet her and her new hubby have NOT only two incomes,but also my support...yet,I am a single father and ONLY have my income to support my kids 42% and if I take off work the rent won't get paid...Single parents do what they have to do which means sometime we might just have to schedule their appts. when we have some time off. | |
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