| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 3:55:58 PM | | why is it when you are a woman with children men get scared.but when its a guy with children it is easy for them to meet people.and why do some guys think children just get in the way of things.children are a blessing i know my boys sure are.... | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 4:08:44 PM | You're meeting the wrong kind of men.
Meet someone who likes and welcomes children. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 4:11:06 PM | i agree with 13.
there is nothing negative about children, mine or yours. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 4:18:31 PM | I'm a single dad who has raised my children from ages one,three,five and seven.I've found the exact opposite.It's woman that arn't very accepting of men that have custody of thier children.I;ve even heard woman say 'I have my oun why would I want some one elses?'.
I devoted a thread to this a while back. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 4:30:47 PM | | thats what i say all the time children are a blessing. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 4:37:02 PM | I agree that any man or woman who gets scared off dating a man or woman with kids is not a worthwhile person and its better it unfolds that way. My personal feelings about men who have custody and/or were a single parent for whatever reason is a VERY fascinating person. We women think its hard, a man bringing up 2 or more kids is a superman and must have to put up with a lot of 'good intention' input when it is not solicited and/or necessary at that time. I applaud all single fathers. And before anyone jumps on me, any woman who does a marvelous job with her children is superwoman in my books. Wasn't that what the show "Brady Bunch" or was it "Eight is Enough"? | |
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mdmac
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Joined: 11/16/2006
Msg: 7 | |
| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 7:49:24 PM | | I think it has more to do with the person than the gender. I don't really notice negative people when it comes to my kids. My angels are such a big part of my life that any one that isn't into kids or negative about them get left by the wayside in a hurry. I find that I gravitate more towards people with kids and kid-people anyways. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/13/2007 10:05:37 PM | Truthfully, I came on here expecting that the majority of people wouldn't be interested in me because I have 4 children, but most of the ones I have chatted with and met have no problem with it. I am very upfront about them, which I think helps weed out those who won't be understanding. Children can take up a large part of your life, but the 'right' person for you will understand that - keep looking and don't worry about the ones who aren't interested in your life (which includes your children).
~M | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 8:46:06 AM | Gosh I need to get this out! When I first saw the heading for this thread I instantly thought 'they must be kidding' because of the 'kids and dating'. I thought it meant the kids were dating! I'm glad you feel better. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 2:04:49 PM | | I agree with 13 and quadly - you're just meeting the wrong kind of guys. Children are awesome no matter who's they are. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 2:31:19 PM | It's hard to date and have kids but if the children require lots of attention and care, how fair is to the kids if ur spending lots of time dating, never mind the economic costs of dating? We all that dating is NOT cheap but if the kids suffer or r left out money being spent on making an impression for the person ur seeing is that fair? I think NOT! 
Not pointing any fingers @ anyone here but know of a few situations like this. Not talking about presents, toys etc but basic needs of food, clothing and shelter. Some pple have their priorities mixed up all for the sake of making an impression, pretending to be or show something they do not have.
It's way too much having different pple in their lives too and doesn't leave a good impression. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 2:41:04 PM | children are a blessing ... but in the end everyone has their own opinion of weither or not they want to get into a relationship with someone who has kids or not
being that i cant and do not want anymore kids i tend to look for men that are around my own age who have kids around my boys age and stay away from the ones who say they want kids ...
keep looking the one for you is out there ...  | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 2:42:34 PM | | i have a rule, and my kids will not meet a potential bf.. a friend yes.. but if i feel any sort of a spark, then they will not. I Have on POF known that someone was gonna be nothing more then a short fling thing, because he didn't like, or didn't want kids. ALSO didn't know how to play like a kid, which i think is such an important part of life. Wether you have kids or not!~!! | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 3:32:18 PM | | Like the rest of the posters, I have not experienced this and think that you must be meeting the wrong kind of men. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/14/2007 10:43:31 PM | Anyone want a girl of 7? You can have mine.......j/k
I am a guy who sees my daughter 6 - 7 days a week. If my kid is a problem then it is a problem and not mine...SEE YA LATER!!!!!!!
You are meeting the wrong kinda guys or ladies.Kids come first. You will only have them like this once in your life and you should cherish every moment you can with them.They will soon out grow you and not need you anymore,we have all been there........ | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 9:20:42 AM | Have had some issues with men and my son....I stay away from men that want children because I don't want/can't have any. I do not introduce my son to boyfriends (hasn't been many) but most of my friends are men so he enjoys playing video games with them.
I don't want my son to think that women need men...it is nice to have a relationship...but need a relationship is something else.
I have seen too many screwed up children from parents that aren't thinking of the impact thier relationships have on the children.
Children come first...everything else follows suit.  | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 9:32:01 AM | I have to agree with almost every one here. Meeting the wrong type of people.
I was very lucky, the two men I have dated from this site are great, one Im engaged to and he and my daughter are wonderful together and he was amazing about the fact that I could not just drop everything and run away. The other guy and I are friends as our children decied that they just can't get enough of each other.
I also believe that you must stay true to your children.... dont things that make them feel like they are less important that getting a little something something.
As FF said I have seen the damage the rude and self centered parents can do to a child when only thinking about themselves.
Have faith you will find some one who values kids just like you do. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 12:47:02 PM | | well i dont need a man it would just be nice.someone that will enjoy my boys as much as i do would be great.i am very picky now that my ex husben has some what messed are life up.my oldest has seen alot of pain and hurt.maybe thats why i am so picky.i dont go anywhere for that one reason.i have shut myself off to the out side world and i can not keep doing that.if i keep living in the past the past will never go away.its hard to move on when you have children that have gone through something bad cause of someone.i know we all have to move on but how do you do that when all you do is be scared.my children are young and they do come frist not matter what.and it will alway be that way.they need me and i need them just as much.the are the reason i am here and there is a reason they are here in my life.children are the future and if people can handle children then that tells me they can handle the future......that is what i belevie anyways.... | |
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ya472
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Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 19 | |
| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 1:01:47 PM | Simply, it is tough to find a compatible partner, without blending other persons into the mix.
Often, ex's, money and emotional baggage stress out the single mom or dad, so any partner that wants to buy into that 'mess', had better be someone very very special !
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 2:00:05 PM | in the same boat as greeneyes.. i like call my little world with me and my cubbies 'my bubble"
who shall burst that bubble? no clue.. i think its impenetrable meanwhile, i shall enjoy all that life has to offer .. like making friends for example
when the right time comes, it'll come
even though my oldest cubby is actually criticizing my lack of lovelife ..yikes | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 3:12:11 PM | hahahaha whitetigress, nothing gets to the heart of the matter than a kiddy trying or yearning for a life for his mom. I call that kewl! Well I hope cubby means a child or I may be
in big dodo | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 3:18:12 PM | gtadaizee.. ive been calling myself on the net whitetigress for years and someone called my kids cubbies and my home my cave
seems to reflect real life 
i think its bad when the kid who is still in elementary school has a love interest and you don't 
ps.. I thought dodos are extinct | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 3:42:22 PM | what gets me is the women that post pixs of themselves and thier kids? This is the internet, not a place to post that type of info. Who knows what kind of whackos they could attract, and they are hard to spot, no matter how many women think otherwise. Just ask any mother that has had a child molested, it's always by someone they would never have thought is capable of that and that they trusted. It's bad enough to have to deal with that thought, why add to the mix by exposing the kids pictures on an internet dating site?
I don't think children should be introduced to dates, at any time, until the relationship is very serious or the kids are old enough, 16 or older. It's too much turmoil for them. As for friends of the opposite gender, great, if they really are friends of long standing and a very regular part of the parent's life. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 3:52:14 PM | | well my child in the pic as alot older now and looks nothing like that any more.and i also think children should not meet anyone your dating till you feel the time is right.and who knows when that will be no ones knows for sure. | |
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| children and dating
Posted: 1/15/2007 4:33:57 PM | | I'm glad to see someone (Cuddly Duddly) making that point. I too find it vaguely creepy to see pics of kids in an internet dating site. All of us with children know that they come first but to put a picture of them in a situation of which they have no knowledge or control is frustrating. I'm not here to date kids..and I'm not here to find someone to date mine. | |
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