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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Guy  > Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?      Home login  
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 mizbex
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 1
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?Page 1 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
Yesterday I was in a furniture store, I had on jeans and a sweater, nothing revealing, just normal wear. Three married men (the were definately with their wives) were watching me, blantantly staring. I just wonder why married men do this, I know married men look at women, but why when they are with their wives? This has happens fairly often, one time the wife caught him and punched him in the arm and gave me a nasty look.

I find this really disrepectful to the wife and really just kinda not very smart thinking on the man's part, obviousley there will be a price to pay if caught. So why do they do it?
 allshookup98
Joined: 4/22/2006
Msg: 2
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 8:17:03 AM
I think you're old enough by now to understand that men are just stupid sometimes.

I think you can sum it up in just saying that they are men I don't think we even think sometimes until after we've done it.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 3
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 8:17:12 AM
That's pretty much it. Because they are disrespectful and their wives allow them to be. Some men are only interested in their wives until they marry them. There's nothing wrong with looking at women, but while out somewhere with your wife you should be aware of her feelings when you do.

Maybe he felt like it was his payoff for being dragged thru a furniture store? lol
 Nos800id
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 4
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 8:19:47 AM
Because they are married and whats wrong with looking at the menu. If both the wife and husband are secure with each other then it shouldn't matter who he or she looks at they are going home with each other and married to each other.

If the husband knows it upsets his wife then thats his bad though.
 carbizmgr
Joined: 11/25/2006
Msg: 5
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 9:10:57 AM

So why do they do it?


Because you stare back
Because you smiled at them
Because you're cute
Because they're bored in the furniture store

I can give you a piece of plain advice..it takes two to..(u can fill in the blank),
and if it still bothers you, get some therapy!
 smith2267
Joined: 8/26/2005
Msg: 6
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 9:25:18 AM
The same reason single men stare at you. God, why is it so damned hard for women to understand men?

PS, to all the wives out there--if your husband looks at other women, he is a normal man.
As long as all he does is look, don't worry about it. Be glad he has a healthy libido--you're the one he sleeps with.

This business about "disrespect" is a bunch of crap. If he's faithful to you, don't worry about where his eyes go.

He could be head over heels in love with you, and he's still going to take a gander at some hot number that walks by. It doesn't mean anything.
You're just going to look possessive and insecure if you make an issue out of it.
 richann
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 7
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 9:42:50 AM
simply because even married mens brains are in their pants, you are a very attractive girl too and im wondering if you underestimate this.
 eman07
Joined: 6/30/2006
Msg: 8
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 9:47:42 AM
just another post by a over dramatic female who thinks every guy wants her and the world revolves around her vagina. Women act like when they are in a relationship that they would NEVER look at another good looking man. If you DONT look , you are NOT human, plain and simple. Stop overreacting and being a drama queen.

I once had a g/f who was in love with collen ferrel (hope i spelled it right)...now we went to a baseball game one time, there was a guy who sat three rows down from us with his shirt off, and kinda looked like collen ferrel, even me as a straight male was like jeez, that guy probably gets tons of chicks. I caught her looking a few times, and i made a joke about it. I knew she was coming home with me, and she probably knew that i was checking out the female that was four rows across from us that had an unreal body.

I will say this again.....if a unattractive male looks at a female, its creepy,

but, if he is attractive to the female then its flattering.....

ugly=creepy
attractive=flattering...

stop being a drama queen.......
 smith2267
Joined: 8/26/2005
Msg: 9
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 9:50:21 AM
>>a over dramatic female who thinks every guy wants her and the world revolves around her vagina.

I've been caught in a few **** gravitational pulls...

(rhymes with wussy)
 onfairway
Joined: 1/6/2007
Msg: 10
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 10:18:27 AM
I once heard that a large percent of women are more inclined to look at a married man
more often than a single one.Possibly they think he must have some qualities that made his spouse want to marry him.anyway that's just the way men are.Consider it a compliment & get over it:}
 tcky123
Joined: 12/9/2005
Msg: 11
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 10:26:28 AM
atlease they stare at you op how about gong to a club and having the wives tell her husband to dance with you and your gf yepa it happens a lot with my best friend and how I know they were married the husband will joke with us and say my wife is so drunk she wont be angry if I dance with two sexy women like you ladies. lol
 terminallycute
Joined: 8/3/2005
Msg: 12
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 10:31:47 AM
maybe you spilled something on yourself, or had some food stuck in your teeth

or (this is the worse)..you were dragging toilet paper off the heel of your shoe...(been there done that) and it took the guys wife to actually come up to me and tell me..

omg..I cant believe I just told the whole POF world that!!

HEY YOU GUYS...DONT JUST STARE...TELL US WHEN WE HAVE TOILET PAPER HANGING OFF US....(grrrrr)
 smith2267
Joined: 8/26/2005
Msg: 13
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 10:33:34 AM
^^Lol, yeah, or maybe your boob's peeking out...skirt tucked into your underwear...or any number of other things.
 Larissan04
Joined: 4/28/2004
Msg: 14
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 11:00:12 AM
i was standing in line at the grocery store and this very handsome man (40-ish) was staring at me. well, i DID look, but then it became a bit too much so i just started ignoring him. two minutes later, a woman came up and stood next to him in line. she was probably in her mid-thirties, and was obviously very pregnant. i immediately wanted to throw up and shot the guy about the dirtiest look i could muster. :)

this is just one example, what about the men who make eyes at you while they are sitting thier with thier date at a restaurant or at a bar?

no self respecting woman would ever date a man that would treat another woman in this manner.

guys? what have you to say? why do you do this?

lara
 terminallycute
Joined: 8/3/2005
Msg: 15
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 11:09:03 AM
msg 12 applies to you as well Lara!!


If I see someone who is attractive I look too... As some of the others have said..
consider it a compliment and get over it.

It isnt that he wants to jump your bones. It maybe the simple fact that he thinks you are nice to look at.....or butt ugly!!

we tend to stare at ugly beings as well (human nature)
 eman07
Joined: 6/30/2006
Msg: 16
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 11:11:25 AM
lara....

read my previous post on "over dramatic females"....

that is my answer......

I was in line at the grocery store with my wife (who is pregnant).....she stepped away to get a few things. I was standing in line and saw a very pretty female standing in line. I was blown away how pretty she was. My wife came back, and of course i focused all my attention on my wife. I think the other women took it the wrong way like i was trying to get with her, cause all she gave me was dirty looks the rest of the time. Not gonna lie, she was pretty, but there is no way in hell i was gonna leave my wife right there at the grocery story for her....jeez....

^^^^^
above is the guy version of YOUR story.......two sides to everything right?

stop being a drama queen.....so he looked at you....BIG FREAKING DEAL....move on....jeez...

If he goes up to you later and asks you out on a date when he has a g/f...then yea...that is disrespectful...but cmon.....are we really gonna get mad cause a guy LOOKED at you?....really?......
 onfairway
Joined: 1/6/2007
Msg: 17
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 11:54:54 AM
Lara
Why do you and alot of women have to read more into situations than is really there?
You think right away he wants to have sex,when he was flattered you were looking at him.
Did he wink at you or did his posture change in anyway? Probably not.
Any man is going to look, or even stare at a woman he finds attractive.Whether she is with someone or not.And if she is with someone, he will either be flattered because he is the one that is with her.Or he is going to be pissed off.You never know.
I am almost afraid to look a woman in the eye.These days a man doesn't know if she is
going to pull a gun or something.Sounds extreme I know but hey'
 semper_vera
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 18
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 12:18:58 PM
"Disrespectful"? Only if he says "wow I wish you looked like that". Then I .would. slug him. Other than that, he's looking, not flirting. And I'm not going to stop looking at hot guys, so...

"a price to pay if caught"? lol My reaction tends to be a variation of the following two options:
1. "Really?? What do you see in her???" (this also has potential benefits. If he says 'it's not her, it's her [insert article of clothing] they really turn me on', then I'm going out and buying that for myself! lol)
2. "Wow. Yeah, she is hot." (sometimes including "No, you can't have her.")

If I'm insecure enough to be bothered by the fact that he looks (just .looks.) at another woman, there's something more wrong with the relationship than just who he's looking at.

sv
 mizbex
Joined: 12/17/2006
Msg: 19
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 12:19:16 PM
Well gentleman, thank you for your opinions. I didn't get mad, I just find it odd.
 ChicagoStyle
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 20
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 1:23:36 PM
Sometimes a guy will stare because the girl is really beautiful. She might look like someone he knew growing up or use to work with. Maybe her boobs are showing. LOL.

A guy doesn't always stare because he wishes he could get into her pants. And, no matter who he is with, if the urge to look at a nice looking lady strikes, he will look. I don't think it's a matter of disrespect, more of in our human nature, men and women.

Now, if he hits on her or pays more attention to her while you two are out, that is obviously a problem. Or, even if he is out with the guys, it's ok to look at another women, but that should be the end of it.

But, for the most part, i would say take it as a compliment and not as the guy wishing you and him will lay up in bed at the end of the night. Not all guys think like that, though some do.
 Milehiguy
Joined: 12/14/2006
Msg: 21
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 2:19:35 PM
Even though we're married, we're not dead, lol. ( oooo, that sounds bad). Staring is one thing....a glance is another. Married or not you're going to at least NOTICE the opposite sex still. Doing it blatently in front of your wife/husband is pretty rude. Like your wife isn't ever going to notice the well-built stock boy in the grocery store? In most cases it's just harmless.....human nature. It doesn't mean they wish they could have that person over you...It's just being human. You know and love the person you're with.... the person they may look at is just a nice looking stranger who they know nothing about. For the most part...on both sides...it means nothing. YOU'RE with them....NOT the guy/girl in the store.... If it's really obvious, ask them about it and tell them that you noticed and that it hurt. If they love you they will realize it and not do it. In the past,of course I've noticed the cute check-out girl.... but was ALWAYS happy for having the wonderful woman who I was with. Note: I'm not married....I meant way back when I was! LOL.
 Always Smiling36
Joined: 1/3/2007
Msg: 22
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 3:32:00 PM
Men are visual creatures. Nothing you say can change it, its genetic.
If they look, its just that, looking.

I think women who get upset over it are insecure.
 Doouglass
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 23
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 3:49:45 PM
Clearly they were all wondering where you got the sweater and the wife wasn't happy you had it and she didn't. You're reading way toooo much into this.
 ubkobalt
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 24
Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 6:03:55 PM
I don't think the radar ever fully goes away.
But looking is FAR FAR away from actually thinking about her or doing anything. Maybe there's a lusty thought in there, maybe there isn't. It's wrong to always assume that looking and lusting are the same thing.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 25
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Why do married men stare at you when they are with their wives?
Posted: 1/14/2007 6:17:55 PM
I realize men are going to look, and if they do I sure as hell don't think it's about me. I know full well that most times a woman that's breathing and that he's not already with will suffice for a look from a guy...

It doesn't bother me - I'll sit around with someone I'm involved with and scope women out next to him - I'm pretty secure in my relationships. Hell, I'd even take him to a strip club and buy him a lap dance, but I'm totally the exception. Most men I date don't want to sit around and scope guys out with me, but I digress. I look at men myself while with someone, I am not dead either. But I try to be subtle.

A lot of married women do find it disrespectful that their husband looks at other women. That's not going to change anytime soon from what I can see...so the husbands need to at least make it casual, or random and not gawk a lot if they are gonna do it.
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