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 shel777
Joined: 1/3/2007
Msg: 1
Why are women seemly so selfish?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Most ads I see (regardless of where), the women claim they are kind and loving (doesn't aleays seem to be true when you meet them), and the bottom line is they want a man who:

1. Is financially secure (I translate that to mean richly prosperous - some sort of corporate exec)

2. Will sugar-daddy them (women claim they love "fine dining," "travel," and "shopping")

3. Expect that *we* will overlook all of their problems, issues, and assorted baggage (but we had better be perfect).

Why can't a woman simply want a regular guy, who has an honest job, is clean, healthy, and takes care of himself? And why is it, when both parties are investing in one another to hopefully find a future together, that it is the man only who is expected to pay all of the tab?

Do we all have to be corporate executives, and be willing to assume all of the risk? Or is this just a South Florida thing?

Thanks in advance!! :)
 Tinks21
Joined: 12/7/2006
Msg: 2
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 8:06:35 AM
Hmmm... sounds as though your trying a lil to hard to read between the lines here.


I know that when I had a profile up and was looking for someone, I wanted a man that was financially secure. AND that meant NOTHING more then wanting a guy that can support himself. Meaning, that I didnt want to be his Sugar-Momma.


I still have "shopping" and "travel" listed under my interests - and no where in there do I ask for the man to pay for it all. Im a big girl, I can pay my own way. Just means that those are two things that I like to do.


**Maybe you could try giving the whole online dating thing more then a couple weeks to work,try not to have such a jaded attitude and remove some of your restrictions.


OE: Try to look for someone more in your own age range. Why would a 29 year old woman want to date a 56 year old man if he wasnt going to be her sugar-daddy???
 AcesDJD
Joined: 6/19/2006
Msg: 3
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 8:15:34 AM
Dating is economics. If the market is willing to give the object of your affection true love and a big allowance, then the average Joe won't be able to afford her.

As soon as most guys stop hitting on every woman that's remotely attractive, maybe things will turn around. Until then, its a seller's not a buyer's market.
 soxred
Joined: 11/1/2006
Msg: 4
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 8:16:43 AM
TINKS21, I couldn't have said that any better than you just did.....
 JasmineKai
Joined: 10/27/2005
Msg: 5
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 8:17:55 AM
Clearly I need to update my profile to add these wonderful suggestions:


1. Is financially secure (I translate that to mean richly prosperous - some sort of corporate exec)

2. Will sugar-daddy them (women claim they love "fine dining," "travel," and "shopping")

3. Expect that *we* will overlook all of their problems, issues, and assorted baggage (but we had better be perfect).


Or maybe you'll read my profile and just assume I meant the above.

Number 3 is hilarious. I'm sure in many profiles you see "Overlook my problems!!@#$ But I won't overlook yours!"

And up until this moment I was unaware that my love of shopping, travel and not eating at McDonalds meant that I wanted a sugar daddy. But now I know!
 prolibertate
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 6
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 8:26:08 AM
OP, do a search please; this has been addressed just recently in a number of posts on here...Also, wherever you're getting your information about women, I hope it isn't what you truly believe. It's not only incorrect and very insulting to women, but if this is how you think, then don't expect too many intelligent women to be interested...we were done with neanderathal thinkers a long time ago.

Jasmine...you and me both, lol...I guess based on what shel thinks we women really want, that means I should stop working and paying for all that I buy and look for some guy to do it for me...ROFLMAO! I don't think so...I much prefer making and spending my own money and how I want to.
 Arugula
Joined: 11/5/2006
Msg: 7
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 8:59:05 AM
I looked at your profile and you seem to be implying that you're doing well financially...own a home in west palm beach...entrepreneur...but prefer working class woman. It sounds to me as if you're looking to be a sugar daddy. You might want to rethink that. Just sayin...

Financially secure means different things to different people. Some people could feel financially secure and not have a pot to pee pee in. Others would require quite a bit more.

I list financially responsible as a desired trait in a mate because I'm not interested in someone who isn't responsible with their funds, or who doesn't live within their means.
 prolibertate
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 8
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 9:07:03 AM
Excellent points, Arugula; I especially agree with your take on financial security....interesting that he also wants someone between 29 and 48...I guess women closer to his own age don't appeal...but 29? Sounds like he may not have a problem with being a sugar daddy ;) (hey, if he can assume, so can we, lol).
 Arugula
Joined: 11/5/2006
Msg: 9
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 9:14:51 AM
^^^I didn't even notice his age requirements. That fits right in with sugar daddy though.
 judythecuety
Joined: 2/2/2006
Msg: 10
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 9:38:18 AM
Dating is economics. If the market is willing to give the object of your affection true love and a big allowance, then the average Joe won't be able to afford her.


sorry but my shallowness runs in another direction..I date according to who I find Physically attractive..And to me finacially secure just means he can take care of himself..Should I be looking for someone finacially insecure?

Perhaps it has something to do with seeking dates who'd be younger than some of your
children.? Or your stated preference for the "working class"? Your ad highlights your money situation..then you seek people who you actually could have been daddy to and even emphasize you prefer those with lesser funds..You enjoy (?)having the upper hand economically, then complain it's all you find..why? you seek it.
It's the same as they semi nudies who decry.... why does everyone write for sex?
With that bait ..what do you expect.?


 Sportsdesk
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 11
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 9:43:49 AM
Just gotta get used to that....women think that they're high cass, so naturally they only want righ guys that'll spoil them and be their sugar daddies, average guys like yo and me are out of luck it seems....
 diit
Joined: 12/26/2006
Msg: 12
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 10:41:57 AM
1. Is financially secure (I translate that to mean richly prosperous - some sort of corporate exec)

But this can also mean, "should have a job and be able to take care of your bills, rather than sit some with the remote while I work to pay for both of us." Being financially secure can be done on a modest salary-- it's a matter of managing your money and living within your means.


2. Will sugar-daddy them (women claim they love "fine dining," "travel," and "shopping")

Why would you assume that someone who is interested in these things, cannot fund these interests? For the most part, it's probably safe to assume that people have already had some experience in the things they claim as interests.

3. Expect that *we* will overlook all of their problems, issues, and assorted baggage (but we had better be perfect).

I forgot to put that in my profile.... But frankly, some problems, issues, baggage are worse than others. Some would be deal breakers, others are just part of the person. Each person has to decide for themselves which things fall where on that spectrum.

You sound like you're looking for the worst in people... and as such, you may be drawing those things to you!
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 13
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 3:22:13 PM
"Most ads I see" BINGO...there's your answer right there. It's the women's ads that you're picking out to read. Only you know the criteria you're using, so I'd examine that first. Ohh, wow, just noticed you won't date women your own age. Now isn't that strange, that may be a clue, you think?

You also have "I own a home in West Palm Beach" on your profile. Why is that, I own a home, too, never considered putting that in my profile, ever. Just a thought.
 ksue44
Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 14
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:12:07 PM
Geeez, do you think I ought to change my profile? I guess I've lost a few noodles along the way, but I didn't put an income specification or anything that remotely smells like money (real money or counterfeit).

Travel - oooh now you're going for my jugular vein. I haven't had the luxury of a fella paying for my travels to: Africa, Costa Rica, Mexico, Belize, Holland, or England. Nope, I bankrolled my own travel and I expect to do so, for the next 50-60 places that my heart desires to go. I'm one of those "working class girls". If he can't afford to travel, then he can take me to the airport and wish me a "Bon Voyage".

Shopping??? Awww, come on, what's wrong with paying for a flapper for my toilet? Sorry bud, but I could give a rats ass about shoe shopping or clothes shopping. Home Depot, ok, you've got me there. I feel like a kid in a candy store when I go there. The guys that go there aren't too shabby, and hey, it doesn't cost a dime to people watch!

Baggage? Let's not dwell on it. The past is the past. I prefer "carry on", those steamer trunks are too big and too damn heavy for me. If I expected a fella to be perfect, he'd damn well better be able to walk across water (not in a cruise ship).

Another generalization bites the dust.
 ericj20
Joined: 1/7/2007
Msg: 15
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:14:54 PM
Who cares man, when things like peoples needs and demands get me down i just pick up the guitar and i'm in my own world where nothing else matters, find something to take your mind off your desires bud. I figure if they're like that then i'm happy to be on my own.
 psssst
Joined: 2/8/2006
Msg: 16
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:17:50 PM

Thanks in advance!! :)
I'll bet you're rethinking that whole advance on thanking us now aren't you OP...



Oh, and for a guy that's got so much going for him... what's the problem? I'm sure you can buy a lot of young gals with the money you get from your little entrepreneurial pursuits...

Then again... some of us just can't be bought... better luck next time Charlie...
 smith2267
Joined: 8/26/2005
Msg: 17
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:25:30 PM
>>OE: Try to look for someone more in your own age range. Why would a 29 year old woman want to date a 56 year old man if he wasnt going to be her sugar-daddy???

Flip that around. Why would any middle aged man want to hook up with some hoochie who just wanted his money?

Let's see...is there any reason why men in their 20's and 30's might be dying off quicker than women in that age group?
Perhaps something related to george w.'s policies???

I believe the death count is over 3,000...in a country of 300 million, maybe 150 million are men, and maybe 50 million are 20-40....how long before women 20-40 have trouble finding a mate?
 Mominatrix
Joined: 7/5/2006
Msg: 18
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Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:29:19 PM
Well, aside from the whole creepiness factor of a 56 year old looking to date a 29 year old... We as women especially love being painted with a broad brush. Some people of both genders are selfish porkfaces, why not just say everyone is?

According to his profile he is under 5 foot tall... he might want to take a look at that.

His requirement list... Must not be looking for Hang Out
Must not be looking for Short-Term
Must not be looking for Photo Exchange
Must not be looking for Activity Partner
Must not do drugs
Must not be married

Notice that he does not seem to object to intimate encounters... LOL!



3. Expect that *we* will overlook all of their problems, issues, and assorted baggage (but we had better be perfect).
I would say it might be your choices... less than the women. Oh, and if you are going to post bitter, hostile comments about women to the forums, don't expect we will not read them and be wary of you in the future.

Oh yes... and it's seemingly, not seemly.
 sillylilme
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 19
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:46:31 PM
Hmmm...financially secure...entreprenuer...offering sugar daddy opportunities.....be careful what you wish for.
Wishes do come true!
 TheDancingQueen
Joined: 11/11/2006
Msg: 20
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/22/2007 5:59:00 PM
People usually date the best that they can get.

When someones has the ability to get more than your best can give them, then chances are you aren't going to date them.

Are women selfish? Yes. Without a doubt. I can safely say we are all evil in a way that defies normal reason.

Is that the reason why the women you want don't want you? No. Not a chance. You just don't have enough to outcompete all the other men that want that girl too.

There's what you want. Then there's what you can probably get. If you are trying and still alone, odds are what you want is unreasonable to what you can probably get.

There are plenty of women out there who aren't selfish. But they are probably women you don't want. They are fat. They are ugly. They smell bad. They have ten kids from ten different men. They have money problems. They are too old. Plenty of women out there who won't be selfish because they can't afford to be.

Scale down your expectations or win the lottery. Either way complaining isn't going to help you do either of those things.
 powervideo
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 21
Why are some women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/24/2007 8:02:17 AM
Are women selfish? Yes. Without a doubt. I can safely say we are all evil in a way that defies normal reason.


Not all. Not by a long shot. People tend to assign faults they find within themselves to society at large as that makes their faults somehow less... "faulty".
 Subotai
Joined: 1/31/2006
Msg: 22
Why are some women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/24/2007 8:16:24 AM
yup powervideo said it well..


we all tend to do this...assign the worst characteristic or ourselves or those we meet to society at large....sometimes in order to make us less faulty but more often to explain why we cant find that which we are looking for, or to make it easy to avoid taking chances...cause its everybody elses problem.

If youre meeting women that are all selfish...well the problem isnt the women ...its your choices...and as other women have pointed out...seems thats the type of women you are trying to attract.

I think most of us have no idea the type of "vibes" or "signals" we put out and are always thus confused when we meet the "wrong" type of person.

If you keep meeting the wrong type...well that says more about you than women or men in general.
 powervideo
Joined: 10/21/2004
Msg: 23
Why are some women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/24/2007 9:43:32 AM
Yes, subotai, but moreover: What the poster above us (Queen) was really saying was that all women who are attractive or who "got it goin' on" are selfish because their looks allow them to be. (i.e., all women are inherently selfish and mean, but only the good looking ones can get away with it/allow it to manifest.) This is pretty damn far from the truth, and prompted my statement about people assigning their own faults to society at large.


 Subotai
Joined: 1/31/2006
Msg: 24
Why are some women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/24/2007 10:15:36 AM
oh yeah ...i hear ya.

..i was just rambling on my own theories of the world..and your comments just triggered one of my verbal vomit sessions...happens...


if your post got hit by some of my verbal vomit...fear not...but i did eat apricots...so the stain should come out with a little "soda water"...

 29girl29
Joined: 12/18/2006
Msg: 25
Why are women seemly so selfish?
Posted: 1/24/2007 10:23:48 AM
must be a south beach thing here in canada we are strong independent women just looking for a equal partner in our life! I can pay my own bills, have my own job and hate to shop that's right I said hate! I think you need to open your eye's and start datting outside of your regular circle of comfort I bet there are women just like me in the south beach too! ps where oh where do you hang out???? regular joes are everywhere as well as the jane's! stop hangging out in the richy posh place's and get your butt into a coffee shop and I bet your find a regular gal!
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