| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 2:39:19 PM | The way to describe myself is i'm independent, strong, emotionally stable...I've been dating for about 8 mo.. Haven't found anybody that's really my type..Sometimes I wonder if i'm being too picky or I might come off a certain way that guys feel intimidated by.
I'd appreciate a man's perspective on this. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 2:58:15 PM | | I don't think all men are like that. I for one enjoy women that are independent, drama free etc. Then again I have all the time in the world to be as picky as I want to be. Only because of my career. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 3:06:12 PM | i assume that you are dating men about the same age as yourself, 28. men at that age, generally are not comfortable with a woman that is so emotionally strong and independent.
we men tend to embrace those qualities as we get a bit older. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 3:14:13 PM | | Hmm.. k. I guess it could be the age thing.. Because i did find that a lot of guys my age are not up to the maturity level that i am.. Not to say that i don't know how to have fun.. Because most of the time when i meet a guy for the first time.. i almost get on the level of their maturity..and then decide if i still want to continue to talk... | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 3:19:10 PM | i know plenty of guys that are immature outside of work/business but when it comes to work they act totally different.
Me, I'm immature to a point. Im enjoying my life to its fullist. But when it comes to business, suit goes on and its game time. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 3:42:23 PM | I have my doubts anyone is "intimidated"
Your profile says you are a single mother. That alone would make many many men walk away from you no matter how "independent" you were.
You might be "independent" but your child or children are not. He/She/They are very "dependent" on adults for their survival. Someone wanting to date you is going to have to ask themselves if they want that kind of situation.
Your limitations and situations are what they are, you can play the blame game and lay it on men who "can't handle you" or you can accept that most of them "don't want to handle your kids"
And you can go into the tired old speech about "I don't need no man to be a Daddy for my baby, my baby already has a Daddy" Except everyone knows that just BS. No one is going to date you and have absolutely zero impact and interaction with your child or children. That's just unrealistic.
Strong and independent people don't need to advertise it. True strength is doing the right thing when there is no credit to be had and no one knows about it. The people who do try to advertise it are usually people who are the least "strong" and the least "independent" Sending that kind of vibe is going to turn people off, they are going to walk away because they think you aren't worth the bother and the hassle, not because they are "intimidated" | |
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fame28
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Joined: 1/25/2007
Msg: 11 | |
| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 3:47:05 PM | Nice.. I like your response. I guess that's another way of looking at it.. But what u don't know is that i only met one guy off of this site.. since i've only been here like a few days.
You do not know me.. When i do meet a guy i do not announce to him that i'm "independent"
I'm smarter than that..That's what the forums are for. Isn't that right?
I appreciate your concern though.
Ps.. The guys that i went out with did not know i had children. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:01:47 PM | | Those that are truly strong and independent? Don't need to write posts like this..because they can see right through the drama, and the b/s. You say that you've met only one person from this site in a few days of being here..yet no one you've dated has known you had kids? Where the hell is the selection to delete a post based on TROLL circumstance? Or even self-promotion? Dancing Queen..as a single mother...even I agree with what you wrote. Does it mean I think men won't date me because I AM self-sufficient? NOPE. Does it mean I respect the fact that not every man will be into me? YEP. Suck it up OP. Life happens...and it goes in accordance with the choices we make.... | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:04:58 PM | The way to describe myself is i'm independent, strong, emotionally stable...I've been dating for about 8 mo.. Haven't found anybody that's really my type..Sometimes I wonder if i'm being too picky or I might come off a certain way that guys feel intimidated by.
I'd appreciate a man's perspective on this.
I adore a strong woman, as long as she in return likes a strong, independent man. Being "too picky" is never wrong, it means you have standards and know what you're looking for. Very attractive in a woman, I think.
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:25:05 PM | | well I am 21, and I love my women to be strong, its sooo much a turn off when they just do what i want all the time. is it realy depends on the guy i dont think you can say a certin age group dosent like it. becuse in all reality if i met a women who made way more then i ever could well good for her, as long as she understands it dosent give her more controll. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:35:25 PM | OP a certain amount of humans will walk away...yup yup...but for the purpose of this discussion i believe strong characters like strong characters....others are intimidated and they look for excuses but it is true...that's cuz when my back is turned i know dang well he will deal life and the same for me. To pair is to have ones back...and a smart man want's a woman who is a force in her own right so she is a equal partner not azzwipe.
Same for a strong woman...she will have trouble respecting weakness in her mate cuz she
represents 1/2 of a team.. and if caregiving is an intrest for strong characters they multiply and caregive children...not adults...you can not be a strong character and still enable...the set of skills used to biuld character, hold the energy from enable.......that is why
they have strength...there boundry to have humans suck energy is solid so there skills get stronger or they sure as h3ll have in me.
Strength of character is the champion of justice. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:38:25 PM | strong and independant are two terms that at least in western society have a very strong association with masculinity...some men will simply be turned off by any woman that uses those terms to describe herself.
But i think that Chataholic said it best:
....people who are those things..well they dont need to shout it out...for usually anyone who does really isnt...they just want everyone to think that they are..the problem is in modern times people are more interested in "proclaiming" their own greatness...as opposed to those who just let it show.
As an example....in my own canadian upbringing i played a lot of hockey and at the level i was playing there was a fair amount of fighting...well guess what those who proclaimed the loudest that they were "tough"...well very rarely were they.
For me strength is a quality of the heart not something overt like "i dont take shit"....its more a quality that is revealed when someone overcomes a "event/incident"...those are strong people...and in general they dont brag about me.
My grandmothers mother...was a single mom just after WW1....she was stronger than any 20 "modern strong" women...and the one thing she never proclaimed to the world was her strength...she was too busy being strong to worry about if others thought she was. | |
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laus
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Joined: 12/23/2006
Msg: 18 | |
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fame28
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Joined: 1/25/2007
Msg: 19 | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 4:58:54 PM | | I am strong, independant and emotionally stable, but I agree with the ones that say it doesn't need to be said. I personally have not met very men that are intimidated by me (a few though) and the ones that are...I don't have time to deal with them so I don't much care. | |
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fame28
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Joined: 1/25/2007
Msg: 22 | |
| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 5:03:38 PM | I have never proclaimed in my profile that i was this "strong" "independent" woman..lol
It is just a question!!! Girls are ****es! Drama!!! And that is why i do not get along with them! All of the girl friends i have are somewhat like me..Most of the time when i go on a date with a guy we have tons of fun... But just from that first date i can find out a lot about a person and decide rather i should have a second date or not..
It seems like most of the guys on here agree with me.. so ladies? | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 5:14:34 PM | | I don't hate at all Fame...but maybe you want to step back, and re-read your OP? I've never had trouble finding men to date...and I'm as stubborn and independent, and headstrong as they come. Do I have trouble finding someone to KEEP me stimulated? YES. Hence my profile... I just think you're reading too much into things, and maybe blaming the failure on something that really isn't... Once you decide that you're ok with who you are..you really won't care what men think ;) So no..it's not about hating or drama... | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 5:20:46 PM | hun you will find there are alot of humans here who are not ready for dating as well...they are healing there souls from crisis....they are not ready for commitment...
they are neeeeeeedy lots.....thems the kind ya gotta peel out of the mail box and eject back into the deep end..hahaha
go with your gut missy...you will have posters who try real hard to sell you kids as being baggage but any normal human knows children are always the icing on the cake....
or they are simply small children making stories...kids are the ultimate and anyone who has one dang well knows it. so if some looser walks cuz of your children he is not worth a pinch of coonchit to begin with...who are we kidding. | |
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| Do guys feel intimidated by a strong, independent woman?
Posted: 2/3/2007 5:58:47 PM | | I think the OP is being misunderstood here. This is what I think: Being independant is not something that is told because people say crap all the time that isn't true... it is a lifestyle. Men DO sense this and SOME men leave because of it. She has to call it that way because to ask in forums "How do men feel about women who are a certain way like me" does not help the topic. As far as being a single mom - the comment there was not appropriate for the question. Whether men want to date a single mom is personal choice. This was not what was interfering in dating for her. Some men like a strong women. Some men want to be needed. Some men will feel relieved that they do not have to take care of their woman. Some men are intimiated and feel inferior, depending on where they are in their lives and their own personal views on success. Age is definately a factor in alot of cases. I typically dated younger than me, and I ran into this issue, similar to OP. I have since made more effort trying to meet men at least my age or older (which is 33). They have much different views. For the most part, they have had enough years with the clingy, dependant, immature girls and want something more! | |
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