|
|
|
|
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:29:36 PM | | Ok,,,, so a guy contacts me and showers me with compliments and attention. We chat a lot and get to know each other and he keeps asking for my phone number and asks me out. I am a bit shy and wary, so it takes a little while for me to feel comfortable enough to give out my number. The night comes when I finally give it to him (after about a week of his constant asking for it). He asks when he can call, and I say "in an hour". So,,,, I wait and wait and wait..... NO CALL!!!! He leaves an offline message the next day stating that "something came up" and he can't wait to hear my voice and will call that night for sure. But once again,,, NO CALL!!!! The next day I get another offline message "you'll never believe what happened last night!". By this point,, I don't even CARE what happened to him last night! Ok guys,,,, PLEASE help me understand this behavior. It's tough enough for me to find guys to have things in common with and feel like we could connect, and then this happens. Why SAY you're going to do something and then just flake out??????? I am, "Stumped in the South". | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:35:03 PM | | I had that happen i thought the same thing but then I realized; THIS GUY IS NOT WHO AND WHAT HE SAYS HE IS; and thats why he isn't calling he is embarrased , thought he could get off with a hot chic online; . | |
|
| |
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:37:59 PM | Heck women do the same thing. Go fishing.
There is a lot of people, men and women, who when they say that they are going to call in a hour you know that your phone will be ringing.
Then there are the other ones, again both men and women, who if they say they are going to call you can forget about it cause it's not going to happen.
I wish I could tell you the real reason they pull that stunt or even how to tell which type you latched onto before it happens. No such luck. | |
|
| |
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:38:11 PM | I'm guessing you haven't been doing this on-line dating very long. The behavior you describe is pretty much the norm for most of these sites. It's very hard to get anyone to come out from the sanctity of the computer screen for whatever reason. They're married; they've got 4 eyes, etc. Something they don't want you to find out. Skeletons in the closet, if you will.
I might give em a break one time, but if it happens again, they're history.
Unfortunately, you're probably gonna have to look under a bunch of rocks before you find a keeper. | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:38:18 PM | So many possibilites here...he could be married, etc, bottom line : don't waste another second worrying about it.
Good luck ! | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:41:07 PM | | well could be that he seriously got busy and tied up OR he doesnt want to come across as desperate and needy cos that turns you women off. He could be interested but wants to be a challenge too.Its one of my biggest pet peeves too when somebody doesnt do what theysay they will do. Ive had the same girl cancel on me 3x now all "legit" reasons mind you. so Im not trying with her anymore. If she wants to go out she can get a hld of me so dont waste your time, keep fishing and see what happens | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:41:34 PM | This happens to the best of us, and it is frustrating beyond words. if a person cannot honor their promises at this time when we are supposed to be on our best behavior to make a good impression, then you can likely expect more of the same discourteous treatment later.
having said that..........it is amazing to me the "perfect storm" of circumstances that can conspire against us at times. Really weird, bizarre things DO happen, oftentimes through no fault of our own. Its up to you to decide how much of this you can take, but If you aren't in a huge rush, why not show a little patience and forgiveness and see what happens? if he really is a rude dude then the bahavior will continue and you'll have your answer and you can move on without worry. But what if? What if there really WAS something weird? I have had strange things happen to me- Been chating and my internet kept dropping, so the person thought I was "Double chatting and got annoyed. Then my internet died completely for 2 days- And they thought i went poof on them. (Didn't have a number.) On their end I'm sure it looked odd, and that something fishy was going on. So maybe have a little faith for a week or two, until you see that you really are justified in thinking he's rude. What do you have to lose other than a few days? THink it over.
I've said this before on other posts- I know very few people who have regretted showing patience- but lots who regret NOT being patient.
Good luck. | |
|
| |
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:47:05 PM | Ok ..I'm guilty of this one,,,I have done this twice,,,but I have also given them my number ,,that way they know there's no funny stuff going on,,,You just have a change of heart sometimes. . | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 1:54:42 PM | Yeah, yeah, and on another thread, we may read:
"I contacted this gal a few nights ago and we chatted a bit, and I got her phone number and was going to call her, but my dog started throwing up and I had to take him to the vet and I couldn't get to calling her, so I figured I'd call her the very next night, and I felt really bad, but what could I do, right? So I left her an offline message to tell her I was going to call.
Wouldn't you know it, it's like Murphy's Law! The next night, my best friend calls me because his girlfriend threw him out, and he's like all devastated! So I rush out to talk to him and help my buddy out and then, I got a flat on the way back home! I couldn't believe my rotten luck! It's like when things go wrong... anyway, by the time I got back, it got to be too late to call!
OK, so I tried calling her as soon as I could, and wanted to explain what came up... but she's like really not caring at all now! Wow. What is it with her? It's only been a couple of days! Are all women like that? What kind of game is she playing?" | |
|
| |
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 2:04:47 PM | | Yes, he is on this website, so who knows!!! Hmmmm, not fair turning my logic around on me! I get your point though..... thanks, | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 2:07:59 PM | I agree with others:
The dude is married or has a girlfriend.
Online player. I see that you aren't concerned about him any longer, my advice, remember him when you venture into communication with someone else. After a while, you'll figure out what to look for and who to avoid. All people are different, but the symptoms of an online-player are fairly universal.  | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 2:20:02 PM | Well, Sunnygirl, the days of guys chasing women are slowly coming to an end. That is just my personal point of view. Just like if you keep a catch on the hook too long in the water, it might break free or another fish might come by and snatch it. Being shy and wry is one thing, but expecting someone to wait because of it, I have learned from experience that you either take the chance or risk losing it. Or he might just have be having a string of busy nights. The only way to make sure is for YOU to call him. If you want him girl, go after him.
And I don't totally agree with the others. I like to allow the person to answer before I start accusing them of something. From my own life I know I have wanted to call but, things out of the blue just to seem to happen at once. Or I get so wrapped up with other things of more importance (and yes ladies this might be a blow to your egos, but sometimes there are other things that take precedence above you and it DOES NOT mean we are not interested or into you). | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 2:21:41 PM | | Why do they say , I'll call you tomorrow and not call back. Even I'll call you. Is better than a day and not calling back. I don't get it. I just don't. Why bother ? Do they understand that It hurts ? It makes us mad, crazy , confused etc. ? Worse we don't trust any more. Then we a called a B**ch, Cold, game players. How do you keep from becoming doubtful ? | |
|
| |
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 2:39:46 PM | I know I probably am going to get a "no" from you ladies and gents, but I still have to ask...Has anything or is it possible for anything to happen in your life (bar you personally from getting hurt) that could make you be unable to call a person or meet with a person when you had your heart set on it? Is there anytime in your life when it is more important for you to take care of personal situations and let that person know you won't be available for a time and that you would love to pick-up once the situation has ended?
Perfect example, a soldier who has to deploy overseas (at least in the Marine Corps, and depending on your MOS and were your stationed) you WILL at least two six month tours overseas in a four year period. You WILL have to pull some weekend duties. Or be restricted to base for some reason. Sometimes you get called out into the field or to replace someone at the last moment and may be unable to call the person you want.
While I agree these ladies and gentlemen do give some good advice, in this situation, there is no absolute until you find out for yourself. | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 2:50:32 PM | | Life does tend to get in the way of things from time to time. Just cus a person doesn't call right away doesn't mean he/she is married. Am I sensing bitterness on the site? lol | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 3:28:01 PM | (a) He's a "player" (talking with 5-6 other girls online)
(b) He really DOES have something else going on that takes up his time (so ASK him why)
(c) He's not really interested in you
(d) He's a dumbass loser and being reading internet junk in terms of how to get a girl interested in you (there actually *IS* something so stupid as the "forget to call" technique)
Or. He is a fat 50 year old balding slob with pizza stains on his shirt that photoshopped an image from 20 years ago, and he was too busy eating lunch from yesterday (eating the food left off his shirt), remarking how much of a suave internet guru he must be, that when he went to call you his mom yelled at him to get off the phone and clean his room -- "the basement" that he realized he couldn't call you just then. And then when he did go to call, reruns of Star Trek starring Kirk came on the Space channel, and he wanted to finishing mastering the techniques Kirk employs with the ladies before he talks to you.
This is most likely what it is.
P.S. SHEESH -- TO ANYONE WHO "WORRIES" WHAT SOMEONE "ONLINE" MIGHT BE THINKING ABOUT THEM. *** GET A LIFE! *** YOU ARE IN DIRE NEED OF IMPROVING YOUR SOCIAL SKILLS AND YOUR CONFIDENCE LEVEL IF SOMEONE DOESN'T REPLY TO YOU AND YOU START SECOND GUESSING YOURSELF!!! GET SOME FRIENDS! | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 3:51:53 PM | This guy gave me his phone number, I didn't ask for it. I called him a few hours later. He answered was all freaked out, made up an excuse and got off the phone. He then delted his profile. 
Yeah, and he was longing for an independent woman 
I had a good laugh. | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 3:53:12 PM | I just read another Thread and it sums up the trouble to a "T".. No manners.
I feel so much better now :)_ | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 4:14:55 PM | Ever occour to you that maybe something really did come up? Not some excuse to hide his "other" interest / girlfriend / wife, but a genuine and excusable problem in his life?
You are not his girlfriend. You have no right to demand he call you. You made this guy wait for your number, and then you get p!ssed because he made you wait to be called? Sounds like hypocracy to me. Maybe he's shy and wary too?
OP, the world does not revolve around you. | |
|
| OK guys,,, what the heck!?!?!
Posted: 2/9/2007 4:38:30 PM |
You just have a change of heart sometimes..
I'm with you firefighter. I've done this before. I'm not proud of it, either. I've also had it done to me. Pretty much sucks, too. The thing is, OP, it is pretty normal behavior,for this site. I can't speak for other sites. This is the only one I've ever been on.
You know what they say,"Easy come, easy go."
I wouldn't spare another thought on it. There's plenty of these: 
Good luck:> | |
|
|
| Page 1 of 5
|
1, 2, 3, 4, 5 |
|
Home
login 
