| Have you ever done anything and later regretted your decision?
Posted: 2/23/2007 6:12:57 AM | Have you ever done anything and later regretted your decision?
I did something on Wednesday and I'm starting to wonder whether or not I did the right thing or not.
Basically whilst picking my daughter up from nursery on Monday, my ex's mother threatened to have my face smashed in infront of all the other mothers and worse of all, my daughter. There was no reason for this at all, it came out of the blue. This wasn't the first time she has threatened me, but the first time publically. After advice from my friends, I decided to report her threatening behaviour to the police and gave a statement. Now it seems the police have payed her a visit and I feel now that I may have over reacted.
So, have you done anything you later regretted? And any advice about my situation would be gratefully received. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 6:24:36 AM | I dont think you over reacted at all, had it been me I would have punched her lights out,
my only regret in life is getting married to an eejit, apart from that I wouldnt change anything. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 7:23:32 AM | | you haven't over reacted. she had no right to talk to you in that manner, nor did she have the right to use threatening behaviour in front of your daughter. you have shown your daughter that people, no matter who can not get away with that type of behaviour. so please don't regret it. and if this woman is your daughters grandparent i wouldn't be letting her look after or see her either. and nope i have never regretted anything i've done or that has happened to me. there's no point, regret won't change it. you just learn from it and move on. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 9:45:01 AM | No I don't think you over reacted, to do what she did infront of your child and other children shows she has a little bit of a problem, mentaly. You did what you thought was right, problem with people like that, they think they can get away with it. And a lot of the time with there threats, it's them trying to intimadate. So sometimes you have to take the bull by the horn. Which you did.
Have I done anything I've regretted oh yeah once or twice. Different situation I was in primarts with my kids, and this woman pushed into the que knocking this little old lady out the way, didn't apoligise or nothing, so I've pulled her and told her to use some manners. Next thing she's F-ing and blinding at me and threaten to beat the crap out of me infront of my kids. So i told her to crack on, my best mate took the kids and my phone and my ear rings , then we went outside with her F-ing and blinding at me, she stood over me expecting me to back down, next thing I know full blown punch up in the middle of the high street, police everywhere, every one in primart came out and gave a statement, she's f-ing and blinding at the police calling me a crazy ****, and me well I could have died I was really embarresed. She got dragged off to the police station as she had been seen to throw the first punch, and the police just told me to go home. She was still screaming at the police to have me charged, they put it down to self defense, yes she came of worse, in hind sight i should have kept my mouth shut, I humilated myself by fighting in broad daylight in the middle of the highstreet, I can only thank god my best mate took the kids away so they nevr seen it. But other kids did, and it should never have happened, I should have let her mouth off and walked away. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 9:48:44 AM | Regrets, iv'e had a few blah blah blah blah , blah blah blah blaaah blaaaah
nope i dont regret anything its made me what i am today | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 9:53:02 AM | | Never regret anything you have done....only things you havn't! | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 9:56:36 AM | Well Ive regretted plenty but then Im older than all of you so there's still time for you lot to clock up a few! | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 10:03:29 AM |
my ex's mother threatened to have my face smashed in infront of all the other mothers and worse of all, my daughter. There was no reason for this at all, it came out of the blue. This wasn't the first time she has threatened me, but the first time publically
Laura, You have no worries about over reacting, this type of "BULLY" behaviour is all too common these days, stick by your initial decision & live with no regrets. Your daughter deserves this much if nothing else. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 10:47:25 AM | | Yes you did over-react by reporting that incident to the police. If you had been hit though then you would have had grounds to report it. But empty verbal threats are not much to be worried about. You just have to walk away from trouble and ignore it. Then hopefully the other person will calm down. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 10:55:05 AM | I dont think you over reacted at all, especially if she has threatened you before.
You are showing her you wont be drawn into it but wont take it from her anymore, otherwise it will never stop, and I think you are showing a good example to your child too.
Good Luck | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 11:10:44 AM | I think you did the right thing, it does mean that this incident has now been logged, and if anything further happens there is a history. Sounds as if your ex family are a wonderful caring bunch ! | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 11:28:40 AM | | Reporting small incidents could make the situation worse as it could anger the person more and then they start spreading rumours about you being a grass. Whereas if you allow things to calm down the person will probably forget about their rivarly with you in time. Even the police prefer to deal with minor incidents outside of the courts by getting to two sides in an argument to settle their differences peacefully. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 11:58:12 AM | What if people don't forget about rivalries in time StoneCastle?
Some people don't.
I never have the problem of forgetting rivalries as I try not to form them to begin with. It seldom makes sense. Partnerships and mutual respect always prevails... I'm really good friends with all of my exes as they always meant something to me once upon a time and to ever forget the good times I had with them because of some petty misunderstood dispute would reflect more on the person I am than they ever could be.
Some people preach peace and love whilst having a completely different agenda and it's important that people remember the fakers and shake them from the system.
I like your calm tone there StoneCastle it commands my respect. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 1:37:04 PM | | I can see what stoney means. Reporting someone can result in revenge attacks and its not always easy to prove who did it. I complained to a teenage boy's parents once because he had been playing football around my car. The next morning I discovered my car window had been smashed. I suspected the boy I'd complained about especially when he sauntered past later that day with smug smile but I couldnt prove it. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 1:54:54 PM | I have absoloutly no regrets about anything I have done in my life........
I lived through the 70's as a young teenager and it was a pretty wild time in the part of London I lived in, and the people I mixed with and the places I went.........
Give me the chance and I would do it all again!.........
Well, to be honest, I havent really stopped.....just slowed down a bit!
Life's too short for regrets.
Get out there and do it! | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 2:00:45 PM | I too have no regrets, you do something because thats what fate has intended for you. i don't think you did the wrong thing but only you know if you did or not.
Actually i do regret drinking some jd and coke tonight as i am probably talking ball ocks today,lol. | |
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Posted: 2/23/2007 2:07:32 PM |
Basically whilst picking my daughter up from nursery on Monday, my ex's mother threatened to have my face smashed in
I noted that she threatend to HAVE it smashed in, yet didnt say she was going to do it herself.
That to me represents the worst kind of bully.......someone who starts the aggro then gets "her mates" to do her dirty work..........It's lower than disgusting, thats not even taking into account where she said it and in front of your daughter too! 
Never back down from bullies, and use every weapon in your a***nal to beat them, if that includes the police, then flippin; well do it!
As far as regrets go, i dont really worry about regretting something, if it ever happens i just use the experience as a positive and consider it all part of the learning process. | |
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Posted: 2/24/2007 3:14:32 AM | | THIS SORT OF BEHAVIOUR SHOULD ALWAYS BE REPORTED.This is not acceptable any behaviour that causes alarm or distress.this woman should not be allowed to behave in this manner we live in a civilised(supposed to be) society. | |
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Posted: 2/24/2007 4:23:25 AM | nah...i dont think you over reacted....you were just looking after your best interests....the last thing you want is to be threatened while pucking up your daughter from school!
Regrets....no....i've learned that there's no point havin regrets,you cant change the past and what mistakes we do make,hopefully it makes us better people and we shudnt make the same mistake twice....tho sumtimes it dont work out that way! | |
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Posted: 2/24/2007 5:09:48 AM | dito to message 3, and others with similar views.
i would have said 'amen', but then i'm not religous!lol
oh! what a surprise! the mods want me to waffle on. well, you asked for it. as i've said to a few people, me and lame donkeys go hand in hand.........................!
actually, i'll spare you, seeing as it should be long enough now!! | |
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Posted: 2/24/2007 5:17:12 AM | I think we all have regrets of some kind or another but the thing is to not dwell on them. I tend to regret things I havent done rather than things I have but life is deff too short so I just try to get on with life as best I can and when I mess up then hopefully learn from my mistakes and move on.
One thing i DO regret is not telling my mum how much I loved her until she was dying though I am sure she knew, im just not of these people who are great at talking about their feelings, did tell her but just not enough and its too late now. | |
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Posted: 2/24/2007 5:21:32 AM | I suppose I have done things in my past and thought later maybe I shouldnt have done that..
But whats done is done..If you regret things later, maybe you should think them through more carefully before hand..But I suppose we are all guilty of doing something in the heat of the moment..
As for the OP, to me those that shout their mouths off about what they are gonna or will do, dont often follow it through they just want to be noticed most of the time.
You did the right thing, better that than lowering yourself to her level by having a slagging match in the street.. | |
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Posted: 2/24/2007 7:02:05 AM | One of my regrets in life is that I never joined the armed forces. At school it was all I wanted to do, but upon leaving school I wanted to 'have a bit of fun first' before going in the army. Guess I procrastinated until it was too late. Last month I went on friendsreunited.com and looked up an old school mate who I hadn't seen since leaving. In school, joining the army was all we talked about and he did, and he is stationed in Iraq. | |
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Posted: 2/25/2007 9:22:48 PM |
Yes you did over-react by reporting that incident to the police. If you had been hit though then you would have had grounds to report it. But empty verbal threats are not much to be worried about. You just have to walk away from trouble and ignore it. Then hopefully the other person will calm down.
On the contrary, in this situation, reporting the incident appears to have been the sensible thing to do.
You don't have to be hit to report a threat. And you don't know if it's empty or not. Furthermore, there is the daughter to think about: she should not have to witness her mother being verbally abused and threatened.
Trying to walk away from trouble and ignore it allows trouble to take you from behind.
Hopefully the other person will calm down? And if they don't?
This was not the first time threats were made. This is the first time they were made in public. In other words, the situation is getting worse, not better, and the one making the threats is getting bolder.
It is best to report it for two reasons: it sends a message that this behaviour will not be tolerated, and it puts the incident on record - which would be significant if there are more incidents.
sv | |
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Posted: 3/9/2007 2:42:38 AM | MSG 1
Have you ever done anything and later regretted your decision?
Several times, unfortunately.
There were things which I wish I hadn't done (like selling my house in Halifax when I first moved down to London- huge mistake), and things that I wish I HAD done...
Then there are the matters which, at first sight, would/might no longer be a cause of regret if I made a telephone call. There are two main ones at present, the major being the matter of me and my parents. | |
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