| | is making love really just sexPage 1 of 3 (1, 2, 3) | The sexual act is designed in my opinion to be an expression of love. When love is involved that is when I believe it is all encompassing.
Sex for sex sake can leave one feeling cheap, used or empty because quite often after the act one or the other or both people check out emotionally. Emotions are a big part of sex to me, it is why I call it "love making"
When your crushing on someone, in lust and turned on its easy in the heat of the moment to say "your place or mine" but in actuality I dont fool myself into saying this is just casual sex or a recreational activity...I believe it joins two people in the most intimate way.
do you think you need to be involved emotionally with a person to have sex or am I the only one who thinks like this?
or
can you have sex just for the pure physical enjoyment? | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 10:54:27 AM | You aren't alone :)
To me, sex for its own sake is like using a person's body as a masturbatory tool... no thanks. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 11:03:31 AM | The sex act is a primal instinct....birds do it , bees do it. the drive to procreate...has nothing to do with love..
You can "have sex just for the pure physical enjoyment" .......but then there is no satisfaction, just that dirty used-up feeling...
making love is really just sex with an emotional commitment- IMHO | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 11:04:50 AM | Making love is the coming together of the minds, bodies and spirits of two people.
For me there has to absolutely be an emotional connection with the person. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 11:18:40 AM | For me it's a bit of both ... when not with a partner it's that "itch" you just have to "scratch" & when it's with that special person it's all about the other person & yourself doing what lovers do ... "make love"
It's natural to just want to get laid when you're single ... because we ALL get the urges & sometimes you just cant "cut it" on your own, therefore you need a helping hand to "scratch" the "itch" !!! 
Just my opinion & views...sex shouldn't have to mean anything if it's a "itch scratcher" but with you & your partner it's a whole new ball game ... so much more is involved, not gonna go into details but I think as adults it's like a open book with no ending !!  | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 11:27:59 AM | Sex is just one of MANY ways to make love. Making love is what you do with each other's minds, and hearts.
And yes, you can "make love", to someone, with both of you knowing you are never going to be a "couple".
The real issue, for me.. do I actually care about her, and does she care about me?
If the answer is yes, then we can share a special, meaningful intimacy, if the answer is no, then it's "just sex", and is about as satisfying as a lukewarm shower, that turns cold as the hot water runs out. | |
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ason
| | Joined: 11/4/2005
Msg: 7 | |
| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 11:46:19 AM | BRAINWASHING.
Sex was sex until some dude wrote some stuff about God and how we're supposed to act and feel, in order to attain his love. You may not believe this, but our fore-fathers did and they have passed it along through the generations, with or without the religion.
I'm not religious myself, but anytime I make a woman say "Oh God", there's no feelings of cheap or used. Wham bam may lead to that, but that's more dis-satisfaction than anything.
If more guys brought picnics, like Robin Williams once said, maybe went downtown, generally just stayed awhile, everyone would be happy. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:01:54 PM | Damn DaDevil ... did you have to describe it like that?
now as for love making ... well now .. that's a whole different ballgame .. gotta love looking in da eyes during some real slow grind love making ...
yes, sometimes the most amazing love making is that kind
I'm not even going to comment on the man/woman difference
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:08:17 PM | Sure, it began as a primal instict (survival of the species). A well documented fact.
But isn't evolution wonderful! | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:19:13 PM |
When your crushing on someone, in lust and turned on its easy in the heat of the moment to say "your place or mine" but in actuality I dont fool myself into saying this is just casual sex or a recreational activity...I believe it joins two people in the most intimate way.
I don't think that sex can ever be described as a recreational activity!! Whether it's an emotional love that you feel or a physical lust that you feel, it will always take two to tango and it's all good!!! If not,,, then one of the parties is usually paying for it! | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:23:08 PM | | Just .... Do it crazy like monkeys and just remember for you men .. to pull and pray ... You dont want no lil devils of urs running around a year later.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHH | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:34:11 PM | "sex for sex sakes" doesnt have to be make u feel cheap...it only happens when one has misunderstood WHY or HOW u got to have sex!.....lots of diff feelings im sure!
I think #1 if your 'physically attracted" to a person....the sexual tension is soooooo there and u can have great sex, luv-making, even if knowing its not going to lead anywhere!
I'm sure most have had the one-niters that left us feeling 'used' but then it took two to get there....how did that happen? You call them...."needed,spontaneous sex" but not that great"
....as we get older i think alot are looking for GREAT SEX which needs to include the slow luv-making which can be interpretated as 'emotional sex'..BUT HELL shouldnt all sex be emotional?? passionate???...thats what makes it GREAT SEX!..lmao
DADEVIL..hahha WE ARE THE EMOTIONAL ONES?? haaha ur funny my friend! I'll have to give u some numbers of some men...lol.... MEN OF 2000 are the 'emotional' species now (of course just my opinion)..hahahhaha
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 1:17:46 PM | Ive never just stuck to one or the other,has to be a bit of both,slow fast but lovemaking?Its just a word to me like fuc%king or horizontal mambo or screwing or porking or................well you get the picture.
As Dadevil said about the woman,writhing at the end of your tongue,Im sure as long as you make THAT happen and she has the big O after every session,who cares what ya call it!!Theyll be happy.Or so my experiences tell me. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 1:34:29 PM | | I have gone through many stages in my life where my wants, needs and desires have changed. I indeed feel wonderful - fulfilled and blessed when I can make love to the man I am deeply, madly and passionately in love with. However I cannot not say that I haven't also loved having sex for sex sake!!! I think that sometimes we can be driven on pure animal lust -that sometimes we just gotta have it for that primal instinct to be satisfied. I don't think we have to feel guilt, dishonour, or belittled for doing so. Go with what you feel you can handle emotionally - if it's not for you don't indulge. Certainly don't judge others if they do indulge! Sexual activity and sharing your body is a very personal choice - for you and you to decide only - never feel bad about your choices!!! | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 3:50:46 PM | fOR ME I NEED TO HAVE FEELINGS FOR A WOMAN TO MAKE LOVE ,HAVE NEVER HAD A ONE NIGHT STAND AND PROBALLY NEVER WILL .i LIKE TO FEEL COMFORTABLE IN EVERY ASPECT ,so a one night stand would do nothing for me .
I trully believe that the more feelings there are between the 2 people the more intimate and better it is ,to me making love encompasses many things like ,talking ,cuddling ,touching ,kissing and many more things before and after the fact to be real love making .
I like to cuddle and caress alot after making love and talk and all that good stuff ,not into a wham bam thank you man type deal ,just not for me at all .     | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 4:01:44 PM |
The sexual act is designed in my opinion to be an expression of love. When love is involved that is when I believe it is all encompassing.
Couldn't agree more!
Sex for sex sake can leave one feeling cheap, used or empty because quite often after the act one or the other or both people check out emotionally. Emotions are a big part of sex to me, it is why I call it "love making"
I agree with all except calling it love making. Not an expression I am comfortable using for personal reasons.
do you think you need to be involved emotionally with a person to have sex or am I the only one who thinks like this?
or
can you have sex just for the pure physical enjoyment
My personal feelings are that (for me) I have to be involved emotionally with the person. I do not think that is true for everyone and it is truly a personal choice. I do not believe I have to be in love to participate but I do have to be emotionally involved at least. I also find, for me anyway, that it makes for much better sex when there are true emotions involved.
I dont think this is an old fashioned point of view, I think it's a personal choice and one that should be respected. Over the last few weeks I have had a male friend try to convince me that I should have sex without any emotional investment. I have tried in the past and to be honest, it felt empty and cheap just as Mirage described. Just not my cup of tea. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 4:04:03 PM | Making love (or the sex act, if you wish) definately can be EITHER an expression of emotional attachment, or simply employed as a means to "get off", I guess.
To imagine what is happening within the relationship at any given time would require some knowledge of the degree of emotional connection between the pair, so to either partner I would presume sex to be PRECISELY what you would CHOOSE to think of it.
I've held the thought that lovemaking can indeed be the ULTIMATE expression, especially for us guys, as it might possibly be our SOLE means of revealing ourselves emotionally. (boys don't show their feelings easily, do they....wouldn't be macho, lol)
Seems to me that this, in itself, makes the act of expression during lovemaking, of great importance to a secure and healthy relationship. One where couples take their time to understand the needs and desires of the other in detail, in order to build on the experience. I'd imagine everyone wants a better sex life. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 5:03:52 PM |
I think that sometimes we can be driven on pure animal lust -that sometimes we just gotta have it for that primal instinct to be satisfied. I don't think we have to feel guilt, dishonour, or belittled for doing so. Go with what you feel you can handle emotionally - if it's not for you don't indulge. Certainly don't judge others if they do indulge! Sexual activity and sharing your body is a very personal choice - for you and you to decide only - never feel bad about your choices!!!
Very well said Leeanne!  | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 5:09:11 PM | | I dunno....*shrugs* If you love to make sex...and have sex to make love....or love the love to get the sex...or sex the sex to get the love...all comes down to two results. Happy people....and babies. Mind you...if babies happen without the love....maybe the people won't be so happy about what they done. | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 5:15:40 PM |
do you think you need to be involved emotionally with a person to have sex or am I the only one who thinks like this?....
Ideally yes,A physical connection will be formed its unavoidable, your having an intimate moment. But there are those out there that can just want sex to get there "frustration" out, which would be considered "lust". So also yes you can have sex for the pure physical enjoyment.
It really comes down to the person in question and there needs. To each there own really.  | |
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| is making love really just sex
Posted: 3/9/2007 5:16:35 PM |
can you have sex just for the pure physical enjoyment?
Oh yes!!!
BUT, the feeling of making love with someone you have emotional ties with is just so much more special. | |
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