| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:10:10 AM | I do sometimes. I sometimes go thorugh phases where I just completely shut the door on it all 100% and just accept it and move on.
Right now I'm feeling like that again, I feel like just closing down all my profiles on dating sites and just not even bother talking to women online at all.
Can anyone relate? | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:18:40 AM | | I am feeling just like you right now. Every time I seem to get the messages going to and fro and just as I am ready to maybe exchange phone numbers or meet for coffee the guy just disappears!!! I am quite cautious and maybe that has something to do with it but I am ready to throw my hands up and say that is enough and maybe go back to "fate" will decide for me! Any suggestions from anyone out there? | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:19:07 AM | | I think we all go through phases like that.1 minute you can be talking to several people for a while and then they all drift away and it goes quiet.Maybe we just put too much pressure on ourselves to find that special someone.I just enjoy getting to know people and chatting and if it leads to a date or 2 then thats great but i no longer put any pressure on myself to find someone.If it happens, it happens.If things go quiet then i just enjoy the forums. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:21:39 AM | About every other day here... Not that I enjoy your bad luck but I am glad to hear this from a man; gives me hope that there are some real guys out there looking for the same things I am... Just someone special who feels the same way about me!
Hang in there - I'm sure your perfect match is around somewhere!!
Best to you!! | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:32:06 AM | I'm not even talking about a perfect match, just even someone who is interested in me.
You know if it wasn't for seeing other people being together, I would think that men and women aren't actually supposed to be compatible, as though we're just two different types of animals, as though we're a different species from each other. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:33:03 AM | | Posted about this in another thread as well, i would imagine a fair share of people on here share this view of " man this is going horribly, whats the point?". Everyone is looking for that special someone they connect with, who knows when and who that someone is, if and when you find it the time and effort spent will be worth it. Our feeling of hope is what sees us through our times of doubt. To love and be loved unconditonally is probably the most priceless thing a person can have in life, the journey to find that is one of an unknown value timewise. Was messaged by a nice lady saying there werent many Albertans posting in the forums, so to all who are hello :-) | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:42:11 AM | I'm so sorry you feel that way....everyone does every now and then...just remember:
"When one door closes..... another one always opens."
"Happiness comes in when we stop holding ourselves back from finding it."
"Just because we did not find happiness in our past does not mean we won't find it in our future."
So be patient.......we live in a world in which everything is instant..... disposable....ready-made....... quickly fixed......short-cut.... etc. etc. etc....... But relationships are not instant nor easily found. And everyone deserves a chance to be happy...... whatever that is..... and whoever that is with........everyone is worth it.
Everyone takes the trouble to search and search for a new home.......they put enormous research into finding a new car......shopping for that special dress...... those neat jeans or pair of shoes......why not take the extra time that is required to find that special person who will add to your life an equal measure of happiness that you deserve and give you the wonderful opportunity to share your happiness with that one special person.......Isn't everyone deserving of that? Aren't we worth it?
I'm sure you are...... as is everyone else here who is searching ....... it just takes time, hard work and effort..... because we know someone special is out there somewhere waiting for us and we don't want to let them down...... We realize we deserve no less than that very special person...... but it will take time and devotion to find such a treasure and for them to find you. Be easy with yourself.......Don't give up....... and remember...... it's all worth it!!!........
"If we measure our goals by how far we still have to go, we will always feel defeated.
But if we look at how far we have come, the outlook is very promising indeed." | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:47:53 AM | I try to carry the thought that I am always just .....
"One step from Victory"
Almost every great "success" in the world has come on the heels of the last failure. And that success has came for those that keep trying even if it seems hopless. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 7:56:37 AM | I'm so sorry you feel that way....everyone does every now and then...just remember:
"When one door closes..... another one always opens."
"Happiness comes in when we stop holding ourselves back from finding it."
"Just because we did not find happiness in our past does not mean we won't find it in our future."
So be patient.......we live in a world in which everything is instant..... disposable....ready-made....... quickly fixed......short-cut.... etc. etc. etc....... But relationships are not instant nor easily found. And everyone deserves a chance to be happy...... whatever that is..... and whoever that is with........everyone is worth it.
Everyone takes the trouble to search and search for a new home.......they put enormous research into finding a new car......shopping for that special dress...... those neat jeans or pair of shoes......why not take the extra time that is required to find that special person who will add to your life an equal measure of happiness that you deserve and give you the wonderful opportunity to share your happiness with that one special person.......Isn't everyone deserving of that? Aren't we worth it?
I'm sure you are...... as is everyone else here who is searching ....... it just takes time, hard work and effort..... because we know someone special is out there somewhere waiting for us and we don't want to let them down...... We realize we deserve no less than that very special person...... but it will take time and devotion to find such a treasure and for them to find you. Be easy with yourself.......Don't give up....... and remember...... it's all worth it!!!........
"If we measure our goals by how far we still have to go, we will always feel defeated.
But if we look at how far we have come, the outlook is very promising indeed."
But I'm not talking about just a serious relationship, I know for most people finding that can be hard and does take a long time.
I'm talking about even just being wanted/desired by a woman. It's something that shouldn't be and isn't for most people something that is extreamly hard to get to happen. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 8:01:45 AM | | Deleting or not is not really the question, you shouldn't be putting all your hopes on just one option. Browse around men's profiles to get some ideas, try to put pics that bring out your best features. This is marketing in a sense, you're the product, package the product so that it's attracts. Take it as a challenge not personally. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 8:05:06 AM | I view the dating site itself as a diversion. I would be deliriously happy to meet someone here, but I'm not generally an optimist. If it happens, that's great. If not, the forums are cool.
This place lets me express myself, and my unique brand of humor, in ways that other places in my life currently don't... so I'm happy. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 8:12:05 AM | Yes, I do from time to time. I mean, I'm happy and content with my life. I have everything I need. I want to share my life with someone, but, if I don't find him, I'll be okay. So occasionally when I get ignored one time too many, I'll think, "Why do I do this? I'm not good at it. The men I want, when I can FIND one, don't want me. I'm not willing to settle for someone I can't respect. So why don't I just stop playing the game since I don't play well and I never win?" I usually feel that way for a day or two, sometimes three, then some man somewhere will wink at me or I'll get a shudder when one touches me, and it's on again.
Ya think this is hormonal????? | |
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lfrl
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Joined: 3/30/2006
Msg: 14 | |
| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 8:37:23 AM | Maybe it's a sign this is not where you will meet THE ONE. But in the interim, you can still have alot of fun, making friends because you never know who knows who. I personally love the forums, answering questions to the best of my ability and also reading stories of inspiration they really help. It also can signify that the timing is not right ever heard of divine timing. I am sure alot of my fellow fishies out there concur when you think you have life by the balls and the current supposed lifetime relationship you are in disappears for whatever reason (there is a reason). The timing is just not right and believe me I know it sucksssssssssssssssss keep smiling for you and you alone. When you are feeling like this call up some friends, go dancing that always works!!!!!!!!!c'mon you know you want to!!!!!!!!!!!!!. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 8:43:33 AM | I'm concerned that you describe a will to solitude as a negative, OPie. It is ONLY in solitude that we do any serious thinking, imagining, creating. It is ONLY in solitude that we can pay attention to whatever is real in us besides behavior and impulse. Leisure in solitude is the source of every worthy aspect of civilized life. To be always busy, always with people, is to doom oneself to an unexamined and trivial life.
I'm suggesting that you may have a healthy impulse to be alone. Maybe read a book that's smarter than you, or try your hand at drawing or the like, or just sit quietly and let your mind go where it will. You might be surprised who you meet there, even though it's you!
Cheers!
Vulf  | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 8:44:23 AM | Agreed, you can be going down the bannister of life, next thing you know you get a big splinter, but you cant shut down or cut off the world, been there, to people in this world, some of whom you havent met yet, you could be this amazing new best friend, sometimes it takes time to muster the fortitude to find that smile again and keep on keepin on as they say. If life gives you lemons, make some lemonade, then find someone who's life gave them vodka and have a party!  | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 9:11:07 AM | Hah! Join the club!
This internet dating thing is not only fickle (because of how people are), but when using these websites you are only accessing a small percentage of the general populace, so naturally, the yield isn't going to be that great. So I guess it is realistic to expect that meeting what we might think is a good number of people on here really isn't covering much.
However, I will say that I haven't actually met but very few in-person .... mainly because they cancel at the last minute with some excuse or I get stood up. (boy, do I hate getting stood up)
Do I get discouraged? YES. But afterward, I reason away that because this is internet dating and internet dating is so limited in scope, that I really haven't seen much in the way of people that are out there.
So, you are not alone by a longshot. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 9:18:43 AM | I don't know though mate, there are thousands of people on here.
I don't think there's anywhere where I could be in real life where there's thousands of people and are all there to cop off. In fact I'm way more unlucky with women in real life than I am online anyway, to the extent that not even one woman has shown interest in me offline and I'm 31. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 9:20:03 AM | | Never give up never surrender. Maybe you're not taking full advantage of what is out there. I have had better luck contacting women that do not have a picture posted. They have so far turned out better looking and with more personality than the ones with a pic. In the two months that I have been here I have met seven women in person and now I am sure that this latest one is the one for me. But who knows I have another meeting set for Saturday night. What I am saying is, try to re evaluate your approach and see what happens. | |
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| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 9:52:36 AM | I understand what you are saying about giving up. I get so frustrated because I send out emails to guys and then they reply once or twice and then move on and also the fast that I will email them a nice sized email and then my reply from them consists of 1 or 2 sentences. I understand the whole women have more words in their daily vocabulary then men (in other words women have more to say than most men), but you would think that a man could at least write you a good paragraph or something. Answer your questions, anything! I decided to finally just start getting on maybe once a day to look if I get any mail-which usually has no luck, and then getting off. Don't worry about finding the right one though. When the time is right she will come along, it just takes time. Even if you don't meet her on here at least you gained friendships and learned new things from other peoples views and experiences. Good luck and I hope you find someone soon. | |
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lfrl
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Joined: 3/30/2006
Msg: 25 | |
| Anyone else feel like giving up because of being unsuccessful?
Posted: 3/15/2007 9:56:24 AM | | I was going to suggest we go for a drink and a night of dancing just to pick up your spirits but you are a little far away. My private jet is in the shop how is yours? C'mon buddy it can't any worse believe me I am going through a personal hell like you have no idea but I have to keep fighting everyday it's hard but flip if I can do it I know u can!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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