| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 5:42:08 PM | What would you do if your significant other continuously put your child on the same level as his dog?
Example: You are having friends over for dinner and you say, "Can you put the dog in the back yard while the company is here?" And he says, "I will if you put your son in the back yard while they are here!" | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 5:50:30 PM | That man would be out of my life. My kids are not replaceable but he is. I know my kids can be annoying sometimes but hey I am their mom and I wouldn't want any other kids in the world. Even at their worst, they are the best.
When you are involved with someone who has kids, it's a package deal. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 5:59:43 PM | well does sending money to have the dog checked out at the vet but not send money for your daughter count???
Cause if so then my ex would be one of them, he has a better relationship with the dog then his child, but from one dog to another how can you not???? lol | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 6:09:38 PM |
What would you do if your significant other continuously put your child on the same level as his dog?
he certainly wouldnt be my significant other for long
infact hed be outside with the dog walking the long walk home!!
i hope he is no longer your significant other because frankly the man is not fit to have children around him or under his supervision at any time at all. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 6:38:48 PM | Put them both in the DOGhouse and move on with your life.
Sounds just like the man I heard of recently that said ...your a liability because you have a mortgage and student loans. I always thought that assets + liabilities = owner's equity. He's now hanging out alone in his rented apartment.
JMHO of course.  | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 7:23:43 PM | Holy... if this S/O is saying it as a joke just once, is one thing... but to continually put a child down isn't healthy at all. I just hope the child doesn't get to hear all that as it will definitely cause self esteem issues and other problems in the future.
And just my opinion, but the S/O probably has issues too and should probably seek help. Failing that, punt him and his attitude out to the curb.
Just my two bits, for all it's worth!
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 8:09:43 PM | My S/O came with that thought initially - to a point. But then he treats his dog like a child rather than treat my child like a dog. They both get time outs in the corner facing the wall... He (my partner) has been trained better since I might add. What was I to expect? He is a 44 year old bachelor with his niece and nephew being the closest to kids he has had. Now he is a wonderful stepfather, and I couldn't ask for better.
Your guy sounds like a dolt. Talk to him. Tell him how degrading it is to your child. If it happens again, say your good-byes. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 8:11:18 PM | I'm not a single parent...but often feel like it sometimes...to my CAT. I love my cat. It's like my child. I think the point your S.O. is trying to make is that his beloved pet is as important to him as your child is to you. To expect him to choose your child over his pet is like asking someone to choose your child over their own. I think you need to be a little more sensitive. Kids can be just as frustrating as animals in situations like you described (dinner with friends). For example, kids scream and cry and make a scene lots of the time. Pets bark and want attention. Both are inappropriate if you are in an adult centered situation. I would suggest you get a babysitter and the dog go visit the "grandparents" for the night. Then you would both be happy! I also think you should try to understand, as I said before, that to many people pets ARE their kids. No offense meant if you take it that way!
Cheers!
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/22/2007 10:49:44 PM | this isn't really in terms of a relationship but...
In my old community, they had a park with a playground and swings and slides a small soccer field.
People would bring their children to the playground, and others would bring their dogs to the soccer field.
The dog owners would take their dogs off leash and let them run around, do their dirty etc in that area.
When there was a complaint, about the dogs peeing where the kids played, one of the dog owners said "This is a family park, and my dog is my child, we have every right to play here as you" To which the woman turned to her son, pulled down his pants and told him to pee where he was standing.
The dog owner was disgusted and the woman said.. if its okay for YOUR child to pee here, why can't mine?"
While i enjoy other peoples dogs, and am by no means a dog hater, it really annoys me when i go to a mall and see people with NON SERVICE dogs in shopping carts, or in their cars or whatever.. they are NOT children.. they are NOT babies. They are animals. They won't die if left alone for a few hours.. do not bring them to family events, do not bring them to weddings, or shopping. have half an ounce of respect for the HUMANS in this world .. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:06:21 AM | I agree about the part regarding the parks. Children's playgrounds should be for children. In my city they actually have dog runs and dog-friendly parks. This way people get the best of both worlds...parks for children and parks geared towards animals!
I disagree about the part:
They are animals. They won't die if left alone for a few hours.. do not bring them to family events, do not bring them to weddings, or shopping. have half an ounce of respect for the HUMANS in this world ..
I think respect should be given for all beings. You DO realize that people are animals too, right?
Family events are FAMILY events...children and animals should both be accepted as depending on who you ask, either can be family.
Weddings should see both children and animals NOT attending as they are a huge distraction to the event at hand (of course, that is mainly the fault of the "parents" of either....). Nothing is more annoying than parents who can't control their children at a beautiful event like a wedding! Same thing for animals. It's called a babysitter. Use them.
As for everything else...use your discretion. Children and animals are both inappropriate at certain functions. Take into account the rest of the people joining you and what impact your bringing them will have on the situation as a whole.
And lastly, PLEASE do not negate someone else's feelings by minimizing their love for their pet. It's surprisingly strong. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:32:38 AM | Now I love my kids to death, but I love my dog too, she is a member of my family, and I would save her in a fire just as fast as I would My children. Any person that would publicly make her child pull there pants down in front of strangers (or anyone) needs a reality check. That is more than wrong.
Just because there are non animal lovers out there does not mean some people think there pet is important. To some, there pet is all they have. Ask those kids if there dog is a part of there family, see what reaction you get. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:34:10 AM | AngelAmbie
No one is minimizing the love some people have for their pets. All of us with children just know how much stronger the parental bond is (those of us who actually love our children.)
Consider this. I am every ounce a cat lover. I had a wonderful 1/2 Siamese cat (who had long orange hair, but the Siamese body and attitude.) I trained her to walk on a lead, be good free in a car, come swimming with me, go camping with me.... I took her on ferries, the subway, buses, trains and even had her booked onto flights in first class with me. I took this cat all over the world with me for business and pleasure travel. When I opened my own company she came with me to "Supervise" at work everyday. In short I preferred that cat's company to people. Even that was remarked upon by people I dated who were jealous of the affection I heaped on the cat. Very much that cat was my "child."
Then I had a child. No bond is greater. I loved my cat all the same, but I realised that she was NOT a child. It is hard to understand if you do not have children of your own. You can only think that the bond and love is similar. Except for one thing. If it wasn't for domestication, our pets could survive very well without us. Most animals still have some instinct to do so. A child does not. You can leave your pet overnight without a greater worry than the trash being scattered throughout the house. You cannot do such with young children, and not just because of laws. A young child is likely to come to serious harm alone. A dog is not. We are supposed to take care of our young. Pets are a luxury, like a car or a boat. You take care of them, yes, but they are not necessary to the human condition.
You say babysitters. It is not always healthy for a child to be placed with such for their optimal development. Young of any species need their parent - as you so eloquently pointed out - we are animals, and our young need us.
This argument will fall on deaf ears. You cannot understand that dogs and cats are not children unless you have children of your own. I have previously made that same assumption prior to being a parent. We are the only species that will take on another species for pure entertainment. like it or lump it, that is what a pet is. Your companion yes, and I'll repeat I am a huge animal lover - particularly cats - but they are not children. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/23/2007 5:01:44 PM |
Example: You are having friends over for dinner and you say, "Can you put the dog in the back yard while the company is here?" And he says, "I will if you put your son in the back yard while they are here!"
Context is everything. If he's doing it to get a point across to you to respect his dog like you expect him to respect your child, then I don't think he's out of line. Dogs become family members to their owners (usually). Hell when my ex and I got a cat (which I didn't even want in the first place), that sucker pissed me off all the time attacking my hands and arms. We had to get rid of him when our daughter was born because of his incessant scratching (sliced her foot open once). But we had had him for a year, and as much as his attacks pissed me off, we had bonded to the point where he was like family. When he was taken away, it was like someone took my son away from me.
You need to understand something that someone else already alluded to... it's probably not that he's putting kids on the same level as dogs so much as he's putting dogs on the same level as kids. He sees dogs as a rung or two higher on the ladder, not children a rung or two lower. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/23/2007 5:05:40 PM | | The Guy is a Jackass, plain and simple. There could have been a lot nicer way to tell you that the dog is that important to him. I would have fired someone out my front door for saying something like that about my son. | |
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Rhett1
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Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 15 | |
| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/26/2007 8:40:35 AM | AngelAmbie: What?
I LOVE my cat, she is very dear to me...BUT...give me a break.
I think the point your S.O. is trying to make is that his beloved pet is as important to him as your child is to you. And you think that him saying the kid should go out in the back yard if the dog has to was the best way to get his point across?
To expect him to choose your child over his pet is like asking someone to choose your child over their own. Um, no, it's not. If the dog and the child were in the middle of the street, about to be hit by a car, you would see nothing wrong with him choosing to save the dog?
I think you need to be a little more sensitive. Yes, poor Peanut might be sad, not being able to sit at the dinner table with everyone else.
I also think you should try to understand, as I said before, that to many people pets ARE their kids. This is true, but it still doesn't place the pet above the child.
I am an animal lover and pets were always "part of the family" in our house, BUT...if my parents had put the dogs above my sisters and I...well, the therapy bills would be outrageous.
My best friend in high school got placed quite regularly below the dogs. Her mother usually had at least 5 dogs at a time. The dogs ate prime rib and chicken breast, and she got Kraft Dinner and hot dogs. I wish I were making it up. The dogs ate AT and ON the dinner table (keep in mind, her mom was a bit of a psycho). Yes, this is an extreme example, but it shows that to some people, the dogs ARE more important than the kids. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/26/2007 9:01:17 AM | eldubu...
And you think that him saying the kid should go out in the back yard if the dog has to was the best way to get his point across?
No, of course not. I think he was just trying to make a point though. It probably would have been better if he had said "my pet is just as important to me as your child is to you". NOT the pet is MORE important than the child. It's all a matter of relativity to the parent.
Um, no, it's not. If the dog and the child were in the middle of the street, about to be hit by a car, you would see nothing wrong with him choosing to save the dog?
Knowing myself, I would probably try to save both and end up being the one who was hit! LOL Then I would freak out at both the parents of the child AND the dog for not minding either properly.
I also think you should try to understand, as I said before, that to many people pets ARE their kids.
This is true, but it still doesn't place the pet above the child.
No, of course not. But it's not HIS child. I'm sure he cares for the child, but it's a two way street. The mom also has to care for the pet. To suggest is is "unworthy" of being around people and wanting it put outside of THEIR place is not a compromised or unbiased decision.
When people come over to my place, they KNOW my cat will be there and it is our house. Therefore, you respect that and do not ask for it to be changed.
People seem to forget that their "precious little children" can be just as annoying to others as pets. The worst thing for a couple, who is out on the town having a romantic evening together, is to hear some child screaming at the restaurant or in a movie theatre. I know that's because of bad parenting...but fancy restaurants are for adults and there are age restrictions on movies for reasons. That being said, I know that when I have children I will think they are "precious little angels too", but I will be smart enough to know where and when it is appropriate for them to come with.
Bottom line is...I think the mom was out of place. Putting the dog outside had NOTHING to do with her child and all to do with the company that was coming over. Therefore, his comment was abrupt, but meant to show that his dog should have been able to stay with the company too. Taking it too literally is silly. We all know that's what he meant!!! And he was right. He just said it badly.
JMO | |
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Rhett1
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Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 17 | |
| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/26/2007 9:09:29 AM | Ambie: I agree with you that if someone is at your house, they have no right to expect your pet to "disappear". I will do this, though, for my niece as she's allergic to cats. Well, I lie, my cat disappears on her own, she is NOT a "people" cat.
The thing is, not everyone likes a dog licking, drooling and jumping on them. Some don't like the smell of them. If people could train their dogs well, I don't think it would be too big of a problem, but a lot don't.
I love dogs and have no problem with one being around if I'm visiting (heck, I'd usually gravitate towards the dog before the people!), but I don't want a dog staring at me at the dinner table while I'm eating (I can't stand that!).
As for children in restaurants and theaters, well, unfortunately that's something to expect when you go to a movie that is for all ages, or a restaurant like McDonald's. Of course, you see kids in movies that AREN'T for kids or restaurants that really don't cater to children, but...
I do agree with you to some extent, but I think that dogs and children have their own place and they are not on the same level. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 3/26/2007 9:20:52 AM | Eldubu...I think we are on a similar page. I also agree that children and pets are not on the same level, but I think each needs to be respected in relativity to their "parent". The situation the OP stated was not a life or death situation though, it was her own bias of wanting the dog out. I just think she was being a little unreasonable on that particular instance. But she didn't give any other examples, so that is what I have to go on.
I also agree with the McDonalds and PG movie thing...that is kinda what I was referring too. Fancy restuarants and adult oriented movies are no place for children. But that is off the point and was merely to illustrate my point of children ALSO being inappropriate at certain functions.
Cheers! | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:21:53 AM | | Well....there are some people who treat dogs like children. They are an integral part of the family unit. I want to know why people abuse dogs and DON'T treat them like precious family members. Besides...when was the last time your DOG ran up an $800.00 cell phone bill or wrecked your car because they were busy waving at a friend they saw on the sidewalk? Yes, dogs can be mean, but that reflects DIRECTLY on how they've been treated by HUMANS. I once read a quote from a comedian who said a dog is a better friend than a spouse. If you lock them both in the trunk of your car for two hours, at least one of them is still happy to see you when you let them out. Hmmmm...funny and frightening at the same time. Dogs rule. Treat them with dignity and respect and you'll never go wrong. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is if you treat your kids the way I treat dogs, you've got some pretty lucky kids. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:30:42 AM | One question I haven't seen posed here: who's house was it? Perhaps the SO -if you were at his place- was miffed that you wanted to put what he considers to be a beloved family member outside.
House rules: s/he who owns/rents the house, makes the rules...he might have handled it better, though. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:48:38 AM | Huh? That's a no brainer.
I'd be putting him in the back yard while the friends are over. Give him a few good yanks on the leash until he learns how to be a good boy. A bowl of water and a good chew toy to keep him busy while you're with your friends will keep him quiet.
After everyone leaves, take him to the Humane Society and put him up for adoption. After 7 days there....well, let's just say, 'you never know.' | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:53:38 AM | The op never wrote how the dog behaves to make him have to go in the backyard. the significant other may have a different opinion of where a pet should go during a meal. If the dog behaves and is well mannered with not begging for food or go around the table, then I don't see why the dog can't stay inside. Also, the dog's owner may not like how it was demanded rather than ask if he can stay out for dinner.
I agree, steve, if the house is the dog's owner, then it's his rule. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/3/2008 2:54:09 PM | | I love reading some of these replies. A man sticks up for his dog and he's a cad, bet they'd sing a different tune if it'd been the woman's dog, though. Then it'd be 'liberating'. Simple solution is treat everybody the way you'd like to be treated yourself. That goes for all animals, humans included, with only the following exceptions:snakes, bugs, lawyers, and politicians. You can squash them at will, no worries. | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/3/2008 7:21:58 PM | Hmmmm....how about putting the dogs on the same level as the kids? Ehhh....I'm probably a bit guilty of that. It's like I fret and hee-haw over one of my dogs the way I do my daughter. The boy is spoiled, I say. I guess because he has some 'issues', I treat him differently then I treat my other dogs. Favoritism anyone?
And, btw, there is no way that my child OR my dog are going outside while company is over.
But, seriously, OP is someone were saying that about my child...I beleive I would put HIM in the damn back yard.
~Welder's Girl~ | |
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| Who puts kids on the same level as dogs???
Posted: 5/4/2008 8:11:32 AM | ""Give him a few good yanks on the leash until he learns how to be a good boy.""
""After everyone leaves, take him to the Humane Society and put him up for adoption.""
,,,hmmmm,,,I think the "boy" and "him" inserts are Freudian slips lovelytonou.
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