| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 1:28:13 PM | Hi im just wanting to know where most guys stand on the whole dating women with kids, or pregnant women, or women who have kids and are pregnant.
Also would it make a difference if it was meeting in a pub kind of dating instead of internet dating??
Let me know what you all think | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 1:47:03 PM | | With kids...no problem. Prgenant...as long as she not expecting me to be the baby's daddy. It really depends on the woman. | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 1:53:02 PM | | In a pub? Pregnant women shouldn't be in a pub or any environment that serves alcohol. | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 1:55:00 PM | Kids are a normal part of dating.
Pregnant? that's a whole different ballgame as far as long term. I wouldn't want to date someone in that situation because you are locked into raising someone else's kid until they are grown and on their own. The guy will never be the father/dad etc. and will have to take a backseat for a much longer amount of time.
I would love to have children of my own but not spend 20 yrs. raising someone else's kid. | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 1:55:47 PM | 1. Dating women with kids. Sure, I have kids. If I didn't date women with kids how could I expect any women to date me since I have kids.
2. Pregnant or pregnant with kids. I'd probably avoid this one. I think her life is about to change some so I may not be getting to know who she will be. Also, I would question if she has had enough time to get over the father. (Assuming it was some kind of relationship).
3. I don't go to bars in hopes of finding a date. If I go I'm usually with friends so I want to hang with them, not troll. Or I'm seeing a band and my voice doesn't usually last long enough to get to the date question.
4. Internet dating and I found out she was pregnant? See #2
Clone | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 1:56:00 PM | i try and avoid women with kids or who are pregnant. i love kids, and i do what children in the future but if i am going to help raise them i would want them to be my kids and not someone elses.
-John | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 2:17:12 PM | Some interesting points.
Ok so lets say she is newly pregnant? would that make a difference to if she was very pregnant?
or what if you were to start dating and then she found out she was expecting? I know myself that its not always easy to figure it out straight off as i was over 3 months gone with my son before i even realised.
Would the actual father being totally out of the picture make a difference?
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 2:22:11 PM | No, and No.
I guess that's fine for some but it really doesn't fit my lifestyle.
I like the kinda lifestyle that consists of going to fun places...being able to take off on short notice for a couple of days to somewhere interesting. I like planning things on the spur and not worry about the babysitter or juggling time with the father of the child.
I like to be able to lounge around the house in nothing but what I was born with and come and go as I please. Dating a single mom would definitely put a cramp on my lifestyle choices. As for a lady about to pop one out, yeah, once the little flesh nugget pops out, watch her lifestyle change and she'll have no time for you. Heck! Before that you gotta deal with the whole pregnancy thing and it isn't even your fault!
Yeah no...I'l pass! | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 2:27:52 PM | ~lol~
Well for some the whole parent lifestyle isnt meant to be. If you like the idea of doing what you want when you want then youre not ready for kids even if they are yours cos they take over everything
But what about the rest of you | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 2:28:53 PM | >or what if you were to start dating and then she found out she was expecting?
That would mean she lied/wasn't honest big time, history.
>Would the actual father being totally out of the picture make a difference?
No difference, it's not the new guys kid AND he will have to support someone else's child if they get serious.
Big difference if the guy she is dating got her pregnant, anyone w/ any principals would stay.
The guy who left was probably a creep and will always come back into the picture.
You need to face reality, there is no easy answer with this situation, abort or be alone for the next 3-5 yrs. because no guy in his right mind wants to support someone else's baby and that will happen. | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/23/2007 2:41:16 PM | >>That would mean she lied/wasn't honest big time, history
Thats not always true though i was over three months gone before i found out i was expecting my son, and that was only because i was admitted to hospital on something unrelated. It does happen and doesnt always indicate deception on her part.
>>You need to face reality, there is no easy answer with this situation, abort or be alone for the next 3-5 yrs. because no guy in his right mind wants to support someone else's baby and that will happen
Abortion is not the easy answer and i guess some guys would get into the situation as not everyone thinks the same things. I would gladly take up with someone who had a newborn baby and was completely single with full custody and bring the child up as my own, as the mother in me would allow me to do that | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 3:07:43 PM | Kids are only a problem in that they can take away from the time I would like to spend gettign to know a woman. Kids can make it a challenge to be spontaneous, and I am a pretyy spontaneous kind of guy.
I have never had any success meeting girls at pubs and bars so I tend to stick to the online realm. | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 3:22:24 PM | I would go out with a woman with kids, but a lot would depend on the woman.
I wouldn't date a pregnant woman, for reasons which are shown in other posts. | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 3:33:17 PM | | Pregnat no. If its just dateing and nothing serious no problem but I wouldnt want to get involved in a long term or marraige with a woman that has more than on child only because I would want to have a couple of my own. If a woman already has 2 or 3 kids I dont think she would want to have more and if thats the case then I cant see there being much of a future. | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 3:56:14 PM | >It does happen and doesnt always indicate deception on her part.
Since your profile doe not say you are pregnant, that's blatant deception....
>I would gladly take up with someone who had a newborn baby and was completely single with full custody and bring the child up as my own, as the mother in me would allow me to do that
Actually, you wouldn't if you didn't already have small kids. I know enough guys w/ custody to know that women avoid them because of it.
I know a few girls in your situation in their 20's, one already has 3 kids by 3 different fathers.... | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 4:20:34 PM | i wasnt asking because it personally relates to me i was just curious as my sister is in the situationas is a few of my friends.
Im nearly 25 and have 2 great kids, both with the same guy i might add | |
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Posted: 3/23/2007 4:54:35 PM |
Kids are a normal part of dating.
I find that bizarre, I don't have any kids and am not looking to date someone with them. Possibly if I found someone I liked and they had been divorced for a while and the kids were 3 or 4 or older, maybe.
There is no way I would date a woman who just became pregnant...... nor would I be looking to date if I had just impregnated someone. It seems like a bad idea, pregnant women can become very crazy very fast and are best avoided. | |
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Posted: 3/24/2007 8:34:48 AM | | The two-legged variety is generally not unlike those animals with four legs. Never ever get between a mother and her cubs. Death is not unlikely. The biological father at least has some valid and acceptable input to the raising of the children. Not so an outsider. Even adopting her children does not mitigate the inherent danger. | |
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Posted: 3/24/2007 9:29:59 AM | Here is what I have found;
If you are looking for a relationship and possible marriage, otherwise this question would not be worth answering, right? If your just dating what difference would it make?
But if your looking for long term the difference is this. A man needs to know his place in a family just as a woman and her children do. Women always place there children before anyone else, this is as it should be. However, some do it at a much more conscience level then others. A longer courtship period is required with woman and there children to know if the man will be able to cope with how he is accepted into the family. Some woman say they will allow the man to have some control of the children, but when he tries to assert himself she becomes to protective. This causes waves in the relationship.
Some women accept the man into the fold easier then others, some never accept him. But to say it does not complicate things is an understatement of the extreme. In the end its up to the woman to make it work if you have a man that is willing to deal with it.
Pregnant? Thats a little to close to the end of another relationship and I would not go there or cross that line.
Otherwise if your just dating or looking for some fun, it makes no difference | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/24/2007 9:58:17 AM | Kids, no problem for short term dating but long term it's a tricky one.
Pregnant, not going there at all. | |
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Posted: 3/24/2007 11:28:48 AM | I don't care about the kids. What I care about is their psychotic father who may or may not own a gun and has yet to understand that over means over.
I would not get involved with women who take becoming pregnant so lightly that they are promiscuous and have unprotected sex with many men. Far too many young women don;t seem to grasp the seriousness of motherhood and I don't care for that.
That said, the women in the age group I would be involved with are beyond their child bearing years anyway. | |
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Posted: 3/24/2007 12:10:46 PM | | I would date anyone, regardless of whether she had kids, was pregnant, or both. If the chemistry is there, it's there. | |
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Posted: 3/24/2007 12:38:01 PM | A newly pregant woman poses the question as to what happened with the guy that got her pregnant ?
That soon after pregnancy really suggests that a woman is looking for someone to take care of her during her pregancy and not for love. Its a far too emotional time for a woman to even think of starting a new relationship.
Id suggest that its probably better to wait till after childbirth before thinking of a new relationship for any woman. The child has to be first in these cases. | |
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| Would you guys.......
Posted: 3/24/2007 1:08:24 PM | | I'd be more likely be wondering "Why is this person dating after getting pregnant? Doesn't she have enough worries for the time being?" Yeah I can't see much sense in dating someone that pretty much has a child "on the way"....that's just disturbing. No offence meant if that's the case...but really...don't date someone while pregnant....take a time out till much later. | |
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