| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 9:08:58 AM | Ok you find yourself single after many years of marriage. You were brought up to believe you meet the girl, fall in love, get married, have 2.3 kids, work your job to pay the bills.
You're single..50 and bewildered. You go thru the candy store phase..dating alot..but not quite finding your match. So you find a person who appears to be close to right for you, you date for 6 months..a year..and find out what is on the pouside is sometimes not what's inside. Ok so you date once again..finding another person close to what you believe you want in a mate..then something at some point puts that doubt in your inner soul again..
So do you like me, just get tired of endless dating?
Dusty | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 9:13:29 AM | If the dating is nothing but a sort of serial interviews, then yes, maybe you ought to forget about it. Alternately, why not try to enjoy your dates as interesting people?
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 9:26:53 AM | You gave dating a better shot than I did OP.
After being married most of my life - I tried the dating “stuff” and ran right into the - “sex is just part of a date” crap. Three gals of that thinking right in a row - I just stopped. I was just another pecker in a sea of peckers ........ no thanks. | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 9:32:51 AM | | I don't like to date, period. I do it simply because I don't know of any other way of searching for the woman I want. It's a very cumbersome custom, but I deal with it the best I can. | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 9:54:18 AM | thanks for replying..it's difficult for me to just enjoy someone after the 3rd or 4th date without thinking of more in the future. It's something i'm working on but I was programmed by my parents and family..many married 50+ yrs that you find a person and settle down. My sister says..just date em and go on to the next..funny since she's married 40+ years..lol
I'm at the point to just not date .
divorced 5 yrs. | |
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Nan60
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Joined: 6/7/2006
Msg: 6 | |
| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:04:49 AM | Dating used to be fun! never dated much before marriage so I loved all the attention and adventure of it, even found a couple of really good friends out of it. But lately it just seems like a chore, pickin out just the right clothes (which never reach 'rightness'), puttin on the makeup, taking that drive and ending up with one of those 'ya gotta ----you fill in blank lol' on the first date types who feel they are owed something.
Hey life gets to be a different flavor for every change in your perspective, right now my perspective is tad bit skewed .... | |
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Nan60
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Joined: 6/7/2006
Msg: 7 | |
| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:05:46 AM | Dating used to be fun! never dated much before marriage so I loved all the attention and adventure of it, even found a couple of really good friends out of it. But lately it just seems like a chore, pickin out just the right clothes (which never reach 'rightness'), puttin on the makeup, taking that drive and ending up with one of those 'ya gotta ----you fill in blank lol' on the first date types who feel they are owed something.
Hey life gets to be a different flavor for every change in your perspective, right now my perspective is tad bit skewed .... | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:11:48 AM |
So do you like me, just get tired of endless dating?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooohhhhhhh, yeah....
For the first couple of years after I became single again, I dated a lot. Rarely a week went by without at least one date and often there were 2-3. Even when a face-to-face meeting wasn't happening, there were lots of online chatting and phone calls. It got so tedious, not to mention expensive.
Now, I don't even bother. If I meet someone and we have some fun together, great. If not, I really don't care. I have enough going on and friends to hang out with. Unlike many of the people here, I don't believe in a "soulmate" or "the one" , so I can't be bothered looking.
I'm quite content being by myself. I quite like me (most of the time..... though sometimes I start a fight with myself just to keep things interesting..... ) | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:18:39 AM | | It only gets tiresome and frustrating if you're trying too hard, or expect too much from it. Instead, meet a bunch of new people with no expectations except to learn something new about someone and leave yourself open to continue talking to them if you both get along. If you're content with being single and happy with your life, you won't care how long it takes to meet someone special and you'll greatly add to your social calendar - if nothing else it gets you out of the house more. | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:42:20 AM | Dusty, to answer your question in post 1, YEP. More so that women are so aggressive and want to use me like a peice of meat. So many sad and sob stories then come soon afterwords. I sometimes think dating must be close to hell on earth, with its many dangers, pitfalls and surprises.
Got to take breaks now and then, if nothing else for recharging. Only so much sex a guy can take you know.  | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 11:14:47 AM | | NO. I love when the guy makes an effort to take me to places and have fun. My datinglife lasts thru all our relationship if the guy wants to keep me interested. | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 11:19:54 AM |
NO. I love when the guy makes an effort to take me to places and have fun. My datinglife lasts thru all our relationship if the guy wants to keep me interested.
I can understand why dating is fun for you. By the sound of it, you get treated to all sorts of wonder things. Lemme guess.... good meals, entertainment, trips, perhaps?
If I had met more women willing to wine and dine me, take me on trips, spoil me, I'd probably still be all over it too.... | |
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ponie
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Joined: 1/25/2006
Msg: 15 | |
| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 11:23:28 AM | After many years of marriage, I felt the need for comfort. Something normal.
Something as continuous as my marriage was. I couldn't take the candy store faze at all.
It just wasn't for me. I also suffer from the issue of looking at every date as maybe this is the one.
I can't seem to look at dating as a sport. There are to many feelings and emotions involved. I am seeking a long term relationship, not a fling to occupy a few months or a year or two of my life. So you are not alone.
I just had to realize that I have to work a little harder to weed out the fling types.
Yes it is a little more work. And yes I spend a lot more time alone then I would like. But in the long run I believe the rewards will be much greater.
Just don't give up. All things will be made right with time, if you continue to try.
`jonathan~ | |
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Heide
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Joined: 3/23/2007
Msg: 16 | |
| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 11:23:54 AM | Yep.
They laugh at me at work, all married of course, for making remarks like "there needs to be a 'Staples Easy Button" for dating and marriage. Just "poof" and there's the one, ready to spend the rest of your lives together.
They all look at me in jealousy, and aks "are you sure you really want to be married again" - I just laugh and tell them, the being married wasn't the problem, I loved being married, the problem was the homicidal schizophrenic that I ended up with! lol
Dating has become an un-ending series of job interviews. If you pass the first one, they might call you back for a second. If your performance (non-sexual) doesn't meet their standard of excellence, you will be terminated immediately, with no return date scheduled.
Sound familiar??? | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 11:45:28 AM | Jonathan,
exactly how I feel..
maybe..a years break..work on my house..it's very hard to change they way you are programmed to feel.
I too can't just fun date and never hear or see them again. if I was attracted enough to ask for a date, then it surely would be more than one date..
I wish I was like my brother and his friends and just date, never see them again..but i'm not made that way..
dusty | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 11:56:08 AM | good lord yes! It seems so much effort goes into it......... first you find that guy you're attracted to which seems few and far between, then one with morals and a good personality, then you take the time and effort to get ready (hey it's a lot of work for us women!), find an outfit finally that you think looks ok after changing a dozen times, get all nervous (i am really shy when meeting people), then they just turn out to be another guy out for one thing or guy that is nothing like is profile or guy that is not nearly as charming as he was before you met, or you just don't have the chemistry but he does so it is extra awkward because then you have to worry about is he gonna try to touch me or kiss me later and i will feel bad telling him i'm not interested, just awkward.......... or there is the one that you think you hit it off with and then never hear from him again....... baffling male behavior...... ok i'm not meaning to be totally negative, but i've had a string of not so great dates so yes i am thinking of taking a break from the dating thing myself........ of course i did just meet a really cute nice guy last night on here............. lol | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:03:41 PM | I was looking at your profile, and was surprised you think there are a lot of average available men in our age group. I assure you there are not enough of them.
There are significantly more available women in every age group after the age of 30, but in the older age groups, the effect becomes even more pronounced.
It is VERY difficult for an average woman to meet a quality man in our age group.
I never particularly liked dating as a way to find a mate, although I had a lot of interesting dates, and enjoy dating more often than not. Having made friends from India, I am starting to think they may have it right. The larger family there is involved in arranging marriages, and then the larger family remains involved and invested in the new couple's future.
People in India approach marriage with a lot more healthy realism. They expect to have differences with their spouse, and they expect to work out the differences. They seldom divorce, and their children are treasured. They put more of a premium on their extended family relationships, and put much less pressure on their marriages. They don't stop being themselves just because of "falling in love", they find the very idea humorous. The whole process is much more relaxed. | |
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ponie
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Joined: 1/25/2006
Msg: 20 | |
| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:03:46 PM | Dusty, I don't want to even think about changing the way I am programed.
I just had to learn more about the program I am running..lol..
Hell man "We" are the non players most women refer to in their profiles..
They are looking for us too!!! But and there is always a but, They need to weed out the others to get to us.. As we are doing the same to find them.
I love the saying: It's hard to see the forest through all these trees.
This has become my motto:
If it sounds good, you will hear it.
If it looks good you will see it.
If it's marketed right you will buy it.
But... If it's real you will FEEL it !!!!!!!
May good luck and great love fall upon you.
~Jonathan~ | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:04:10 PM | heide,
yep job interview is pretty accurate..
is he tall?
cute,
job?
how much do you make?
money in the bank?
pension?
401k or b?
what king of car you drive?
where do you live?
and the list goes on...
not like when I was 20..dating is 2007 is about money and security..
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:08:11 PM | I was “invited back” with the gals I have been around - but really why in the hell has sex become “just part of the date”
SCREW THAT ..........
I like naked females as much as most guys but ... that THAT CHIT is or the birds.
There is thread after thread about “why do all guys just want sex”
CRAP - they should have seen what I saw and been treated like I was treated ......... yup the gals did not talk about sex - they just STRIPPED ....... there was not even a reason.
Sex use to be kind of fun. I use to have to “heat them up” some. Not anymore - a guy can be talking about mowing the lawn and she just takes her cloths off.
I don’t get it.
And YES - they were all the modern day “INDEPENDENT WOMAN”. I have learned to really hate that term. | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:34:25 PM | | This is sad, but I'm 23 and I'm sick of dating. It's like going on a interview. I always act like myself, but throughout the entire process you feel like this person is judging you like some sort of livestock at a show. You can't help but wonder...is there something in my teeth? Did I just say something that was offensive?Or your stuck sitting there thinking, OMG, why did this person look so different in the pics!And what is that smell?Can I fake a heart attack?But seriously though on most occasions dating in itself is uncomfortable and stressful, both feelings I could do without in my life. It's so much time and energy invested into something that has enormous chances of going completly wrong. And after investing so much energy into the last relationship and knowing that that person didn't care if you had something in your teeth and how comfortable you felt just talking to them, to then move on to this stranger that is trying to impress you, its all so akward!!!I honestly would have been happy to be married already, but the way things are nowadays I'm looking forward to a life of solitude with the exemption of my cats. | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:39:38 PM |
CRAP - they should have seen what I saw and been treated like I was treated ......... yup the gals did not talk about sex - they just STRIPPED ....... there was not even a reason.
Sex use to be kind of fun. I use to have to “heat them up” some. Not anymore - a guy can be talking about mowing the lawn and she just takes her cloths off.
I don’t get it.
And YES - they were all the modern day “INDEPENDENT WOMAN”. I have learned to really hate that term.
Men have been talking for years about how not enough women are naked at any given time...I would think y'all would be happy to finally see that. I used to think warming a woman up was a task...perhaps you all were talking trash all these years and it came back to bite you? lol | |
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| Do you ever just get tired of dating?
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:42:05 PM | Yes, I'm tired of first dates. Been on more than I can count.
No wait, I count every one.
My running subtotal is 55. Bored out of my skull. And I just started dating three years ago.  | |
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