| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 2:37:24 PM | | Ok heres my problem I have been talking to this guy for a couple of weeks now almost a month. Everything is good great conversation he calls everyday. But this is what is driving me nuts. I asked him to do something one weekend as the first time we would meet and last minute he had to have dinner with his family. Which is fine he called like 3 times that day to make sure I was ok and not mad. But then the next week he asks what I am up to and I said I had no plans. So he was like ok we should do something I was like sure. But weekend comes and he calls and talks but doesnt make plans. I mean I am the type of girl that doesnt mind stepping up and making the first move but I am starting to go nuts if he doesnt step up once and awhile. Basically I am asking if I am over reacting or if I should just play it cool and let this guy go at his own pace. HELP | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 2:46:03 PM | | he sounds like a basket case, you should go out with me instead ;) | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 2:51:42 PM | If a woman don't step up and just let me know what she thinks every once and a while I'll get bored. Step up and take the reigns every once and a while, just let him continue to think he's got the control and everyone should be happy. As for that specific example I would sugest going to see a movie. You can do it any day of the week and it don't have to be at a specific time or really planned at all.
Hope I helped a little bit....Its only my 2 cents. | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:08:16 PM | Hey designchick, sounds to me like several things are at play here.
First off, insofar as you're concerned, this guy calling you every day for almost a month... what the heck does he have to talk about? "Hey guess what happened since a few hours ago when I last spoke to you... okay, speak soon!" Ring! Ring! "Hi! Hey, guess what happened to me since the last time I spoke to you just a few hours ago..."
When does he have time to actually have stuff happen to him to talk about if he's always busy on the phone with you?
I just had to say that. Now, I don't know what you asked him to do on the day of your big date, but he didn't really feel like doing it. Why are you extracting favors from guys you haven't met? Now, he's turned off to you. You're okay to call, but to actually get out of the house and meet... nah. He'll pass. You may just want him to fix your car or whatever. That's what's happening here.
Don't talk to the same guy every day! Find a few different guys and speak to them maybe once a week. For five minutes. Don't stay on the phone and gab. Then they'll be dying to run out and meet you because you'll actually have a reason to meet. | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:12:39 PM | Plan Away Girlfriend..Have FUN and don't forget to treat also..He would appreciate the break in the wallet!
A real Neat Adventure is find out what he likes to do, (observe by questioning or listening to him chat w/ friends) Call him up and tell him you have a blind date planned for him ??Ice Breaker..He'll say What ?! Then tell him you want to take him out to a surprise event and he'll love it.
Don't spill the beans...just make sure it is an activity he really loves i.e. Go cart racing, paint balling, Cooking class, wine tasting festival wall rock climbing etc..
Have a GREAT TIME ..just a thought   | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:12:43 PM | You're just going along with whatever he wants. What about what you want? I agree with creativguy, cut the convos short. Let him know you don't want a chat partner, or penpal, you'd like to meet. If he can't call and make arrangements to do that, don't talk to him.
It's not about controlling either, it's just establishing your own parameters of what you want and will accept and what you won't. You'll be much happier once you do that, if you don't give people rope, they can't string you along.........(bad pun) but I think you get my drift. | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:17:50 PM | One more thing..always have a plan...never wait for life to happen...
Make life happen...and consider time to invite him out ?
There are many facets to explore in this wide open space...color your world!   | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:18:27 PM | | Well, dear, I 'd lose him like a bad habit......cause the truth is my dear design chick love that he is nailin someone else that he did make plans with, and he has you warming up in the bullpin. Well atleast it is my logical conclusion doll, and I hate it for you especially if you like the guy. Although if in the off chance that he's just shy....you still don't want him.....What the world needs now, is men who know how to be men, and I'm afraid this kat is a either a mouse or alley cat either way.... a waste of your time. lots of luck love | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:19:09 PM | | Talk only once a week until you meet. Why are you talking daily with a total stranger? Unless you are related, of course, then I can see his hesitation to go on an actual date. | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 3:34:14 PM | sounds like he's married, in fact I'd put money on it
hottijuliakat, you took the words right out of my mouth | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 4:43:53 PM | | He doesn't seem to be much good for anything. I'd say keep your options open and your eyes on the exit. He doesn't sound like a keeper. | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 5:01:46 PM | | Crazyrocker has it right, this is the first thing that came to mind when I read the OP's post. I know this because it has been done to me a few times, not fun. Drop him like a rock... | |
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| How Long Do You Wait!
Posted: 4/7/2007 5:27:12 PM | Absolutely drop him like a rock if he can't keep his word. First time - shame on him; Second time - shame on you.
Just remember, peeps put their best foot forward in the beginning. You really know what you have after about 3 months have gone by - if things are moving forward or their less than desirable traits are beginning to show. If this guy ditches you on the first two attempts out the gate - SEE YA, wouldn't wanna be ya! ...either the pu$$y didn't have the guts to tell his family he already had other plans; or he forgot about them in which case he should of been the one to tell you and take the lead for an alternate get together.
The only way you are going to get respect in situations like that is to let your actions speak for themselves. It's a three strikes you out in my world, and there is two of 'em! | |
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