| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 4:04:55 PM | | I've noticed that men line up to rescue a woman that is in a bad relationship. They listen to her cry about how mean he is to her and first thing he does is try to save her. Next thing you know, thanks to you, she finally is able to leave him and soon after she is seeing a new guy. Not you. Why do men do this? | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 4:12:23 PM | I do it because I don't believe anyone man, or woman deserves to be treated poorly. I recently did that with a woman I used to work with. She left her b/f of 6 years, and was scared to death to do it. She would always come to my apt, and stay over just because she felt safe....Which was fine although I got stuck on my own couch...
In the end she meets another guy, someone who actually treats her right, and she couldn't be happier. What I gained out of it?
An amazing friend, and someone I'm sure I'll be friends with through lifes ups and downs. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 4:14:24 PM | That new guy WAS supposed to be him.  "Hey, I'm better than he is! I do what he won't. Pick me!"
Also, a lot of us can't figure out why so many women love standing by their craptastic man. And it's annoying/painful to watch it happen. Especially when you know she can do better. You don't want to call her stupid....but maybe she's just plain stupid. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 4:21:24 PM | You answered your own question in your original statement.
the key word is "save".
Many of us men have internalised a little "hero" fantasy into our physche...maybe its one too many "fairy tales" or whatever..but many men feel most "manly"..when rescuing a damzel in distress..
So men like that often seek out women who are in "need" of rescuing...the problem arises in that often after the "rescuing" is done...there really aint much of a relationship left.
now dont get me wrong...many men are just kind and good friends..they dont have ulterior motives...they are just good people...but there are many men who require their women to need some form of "rescuing".
I think, myself included, that we men like to have some degree of "hero"in our relationships...wether its taking care of spiders, mice, or dragons...we like to be put in positions where our "manlyness" saves the day. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 5:00:54 PM | The truth is some guys just find it easier to score on a rebound. I would be wary.
Unless the girl is a close friend, I won't even comment on their bad relationship other than to say maybe they should talk to their mom or other girlfriends. This is especially true if I'm attracted to her - it just seems like taking advantage of a messed-up situation. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 5:04:03 PM | It depends how mean we're talking about here. If I suspected anyone was in danger of being seriously hurt (i.e. physically), then yeah - I would try and do something about that. But if it's a case of her being treated badly but being too daft to do anything about it, I'd probably just leave her to learn the lesson the hard way.
I certainly wouldn't do it in the hope that she'd choose me next. If someone lacks the intelligence, self respect or willpower to dump someone who isn't treating them so well - they won't be of much interest to me anyway.
- Gord | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 7:37:22 PM | It's simple. We like to be hero's in the girls eyes. And we think we're better than other guys, so we figure it's our business.
I can't say that I haven't done it, but it's usually only when they girls definitely deserve better, and i'm not trying to be that person. They are my friends and i want to help them. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 7:47:29 PM | | I ain't no chicks superman.....nope.....I tell chicks the way it is and if the guy they are with is a loser that makes the chick an equal or greater loser. I don't hang with losers Chicks hate being called losers, but I just call em like I see em....and furthermore alot of these chicks that cry to their little limp noodle guy friends are just looking for more attention (attention whore syndrone) Chicks feel a level of empowerment by keeping men waiting, tempting them with maybe getting a taste of honey, and then nope... she's on to the next pole....... I pity those foolish loser guys in some wannabe's chicks little group of limp poles.........you know she just may start respecting you if you stop always being her doormat | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 7:54:04 PM | | the guys do it cause they are praying to be next in line, the girls date the a** hole because thats what women do and they cry about the a** whole that gets them off in front of the "hero" guy because she wants the attention and the sex. its that simpe | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 9:36:16 PM | | I think most men are raised to be protectors so it feels quite natural to them to help a woman in this situation even if they get nothing out of it. I for one would even be bothered by my conscience with the thought of taking advantage of the situation to get the girl for myself. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/9/2007 10:47:23 PM | Its that born in their blood code of Chilvary. You know we were all taught from birth that men wears shinning armor and races to the damsel in distress's rescue.
Of course some men misinterpet and thinks it was posed to be damsel in a dress. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/10/2007 1:27:39 AM | | Honestly this is one of the questions that confuse the s*** out of me, i'm like she is with this jerkoff!? The i say to myself this is just one of the anomalies of the universe and move on and hope they have a very "nice" life together. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/10/2007 7:43:45 AM | Men rescue women out of a sense of chivalry. When a woman is in trouble, a man's natural instinct is to offer assistance. Men, except possibly the stupid ones, know not to expect any sort of relationship from women who are saved from bad relationships.
Women actively dislike men who offer them any sort of emotional support. I don't know why this is. Feminism, possibly. Or maybe, although they complain endlessly about it, women prefer men who keep their emotional distance. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/10/2007 8:01:21 AM |
Next thing you know, thanks to you, she finally is able to leave him and soon after she is seeing a new guy. Not you. Why do men do this?
We're idiots. Many of us have done this at one time or another. As you point out, she usually finds a new guy right away who is at least as abusive as the other guy.
I wouldn't do it now.
I think she's just as twisted as he is if she stays or goes for abusive men. They deserve each other. | |
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| Why is it that men always want to save some girl with a mean bf?
Posted: 4/10/2007 8:13:15 AM | | Genetic programming? Perhaps we didn't become suckers for a damsel in distress, we were born that way. If we act without thinking, we rely on intuitive programming that we were born with. The same with woman falling for a broken man because she thinks she can fix him. We've all observed these things over and over. No one can really bail someone out. Most people in a bad situation need someone to talk to for emotional support. But ultimately they need to walk down that road alone. | |
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