| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/11/2007 11:11:44 AM | I am going through a time of MAJOR stress in my life right now. I want get all into what it is but I have a hard time falling asleep if I dont take something, I feel nauseated, I just shake sometimes from being stressed, I barely eat and I have a hard time concentrating, and also I get rapid heart beat.
Without getting pumped up full of medications what are some things I can do to relieve this stress? | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/11/2007 12:11:02 PM | I reviewed your post history to get an idea of your personal situation. You are to be a father with a girl who is somewhat emotionally immature. She has a strong-minded mother who is also not particularly supportive.
You don't say much about your family. At present, they are concerned with your fathers health after his recent heart attack and emergency surgery. You can't turn to them for support.
Lack of support is your primary issue. You are facing what seems like a huge barrier: preparing for parenthood and the new burdens of family responsibility.
What you need to is to take control of matters. The more you feel that you are on top and doing all you can to manage your present and prepare the future, the better you will feel about yourself and your present situation - and the less stress you will carry with you.
You will need to take responsibility for your own health and wellbeing, and help your girlfriend to understand that her present health has a huge impact on the health of your child - in infancy, childhood, adolescence and as an adult.
You both need modest but sensible nutrition plans. You need sleep, regular and as high a quality as possible. You need regular stress relieving exercise - cardiovascular conditioning. And you will need regular practice of stress abatement to manage your response to stress. Thats the key - condition yourself not to react adversely to stress. Its a matter of perception and also physical conditioning (this is why cognitive behavioral therapy and biofeedback are effective in the emotional component of stress response).
If you have not done so, you need advice on how to manage your income to maximize your resources for what lies ahead.
Do a google search on belly breathing. Read the instructions and practice this simple exercise regularly - hourly if necessary. A simple walk, 20 min twice a day, will help - but only if you use this time to clear your head of all negative thoughts and worries.
And you need to pull together a social support network: friends, families, even cohorts at work who are older and more experienced at managing the burdens of family life.
You must eat regularly and well. Your problem is that with a lack of adequate rest and with the heavy strains of emotional ups and down of recent months, your stress-recovery ability is shot. This is the time when you can get sick and also suffer from depression.
So you must look objectively at your present circumstances - make a list of your most pressing worries, and then think about what you can do to alleviate these troublesome issues. Tap your support network here and locally, for advice. Build yourself a short term plan for attacking these problems constructively and patiently.
I would look at your local Walmart or drugstore for herbal remedies for sleep: valarian is good, as are herbal mixtures of theanine, valarian, magnesium, passionflower and skullcap, with or without added melatonin - to help you to feel relaxed before bed. On line, there should be little relaxation exercises that aide in allowing the large muscles of the body to relax to help speed the process of falling asleep.
While a multivitamin is OK, I would look for "stress busting' formulas that also contain calming herbs and nutritional factors that support the body in stressful times.
Most of all, remember that countless men have gone through similar trials, as they go through the transformation process of adult-into-parents and family providers.
The decision on whether you were to be a parent or not has been made: by some miracle, you have a child despite your gfs spontaneous abortion. This is not rare, but it is unusual: a gift. It is not your larger purpose in life, boy; we humans produce progeny naturally.
But it is your immediate and primary goal: to be the best you can be, with what you have.
You seem level headed and competent, despite all of your trials. I think once you settle into the groove of problem solving and realigning your thinking into more productive positive direction, you will do well. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/11/2007 12:19:31 PM | | Pummel something. Take a kickboxing class or just workout your aggressions on some weights at the gym. Seems odd to people that haven't done it but it really is a good way to just drain your negativity and you'll learn feeling much better for the rest of the day. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/11/2007 12:59:26 PM | I went through some major stress when my child was diagnosed with ALL when he was 3 years old. I was separated from his dad and he was away in the military when it happened. Going through all that I had major anxiety and nothing helped it except antidepressants. All along people kept telling me how strong I was, but all along I felt like I was falling completely apart. 4 years later when he had his health back in order, I weaned immediately off the ssri I was on and found better ways to deal with stress. Back then, it was impossible not to use medicinal intervention. Now I find it relaxing using my elliptical or taking walks. Sometimes you cannot avoid drugs but try everything else first. Best wishes to you.  | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/11/2007 1:19:53 PM | | It is funny on this site when a person has a legitimate problems people will vote to delete the thread but if someone needs tips on a bj or they want to talk about why they cant have sex with any woman out there the thread is never deleted. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/11/2007 9:06:43 PM | definitely, if you are having major stress issues get yourself a good "team". friends, family, whoever - make sure you have the support network you need.
and then go for a good long run. repeat as necessary.
look into massage therapy, reflexology, and other natural healing methods as they can really help reduce stress. i'm learning reflexology myself, and find it interesting and effective. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/12/2007 2:05:26 PM | sombient provided some very good advice.
She mentioned "bell breath". It's free and effective. You should be able to do it all the time after a while.
The other thing you should look into is religion. I find it's very soothing (sp?) to sing along in church. Prayer does work.
Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John,
Bless this bed that I lay on.
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I give my soul to Christ to keep.
---------------1----------------------------
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.
-------------2---------------------------------------
Four corners to my bed,
Four angels 'round my head,
One to watch, one to pray,
And two to bear my soul away.
I go by sea, I go by land,
The Lord made me with his right hand,
If any danger come to me,
Sweet Jesus Christ, deliver me.
For he's the branch and I'm the flower,
Pray God send me a happy hour,
And if I die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/12/2007 2:27:40 PM | | Hey have you tired belly dancing?...It is a wonderful way to get rid of stress.... just grab a mirror and concentrate on how your body feels and moves to the beat of the music...It is a great way to forget your troubles for an hour and it really works! | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/14/2007 10:00:51 AM | Hi- Have you pin pointed your worry. The mind and body work together.
Ways to relieve ordinary stress.
warm bath with candles
balanced diet
no sugar
no caffeine
walk or excersize daily
get a hobby
don't smoke and if you do limit yourself and start quitting slowlly.
Reckonnize the stressors , list them, get rid of the ones you can and learn a new approach for the others. Stress is a factor in health care. Practice relaxation deep square breathing. Imagine in your mind a box, concentrate with your eyes closed on connecting the corners with a pencil. With each breath you cross to the next corner and so on. It will reduce palpatations and slow down breathing. Check out anixety. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/15/2007 11:42:12 PM | Well this can range from simple to complex depending on level.
Try a few simple things:
Physical activity- running with NO music- listen to your breathing so meditative, or swimming are good examples.
Get emotional support from someone whom you trust and can just listen or help you focus on the solution. If no one, try venting to a pet or go to talk to a church pastor. I know it may be hard right now, but try to think of one thing you are grateful for daily.
Nourishment: take some vitamins to help you as you will need them more in stressful times-also load up on Vitaom b and selenium; you will also need to eat healthy.
Sleep: Drink camomile tea before bed or "SleepyTime" tea; use aromatherapy oils such as lavender.
Try relaxing activities: have a soaking hot bath with aromatherapy; watch a candle in silence for 15 mins before bed; learn meditation; write your thoughts down;Pray. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 4/21/2007 12:29:47 AM | I can’t stress enough, no pun intended, that EXERCISE is a good start to any stress reduction . I think that's the consensus of most in here.
Understand we all have stresses in our lives, some perhaps more than others, but we all must learn to deal with it. Some stress is even good for you. Stressful moments will come and go, some will linger. Some causes of stress you can’t control, but you can take measures to lessen the effects or even eliminate it. Furthermore, you can adapt. It takes mental toughness to persevere. The same kinda perseverance it takes to quit smoking or lose weight.
Concerning your sleep and rapid heart beat. If you drink any beverages with caffeine, cut back or eliminate them.
When you lie in bed, counter any negative thoughts that may work their way into your head with positive thoughts. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/9/2007 1:38:45 AM | Great ways of relieving stress; exercise...wiser methods depend upon conditioning but I'd always reccommend Thai Chi, swimming and cycling. Using a punching bag. Doing pillow fights. I call exercise SWEAT therapy. Also, massage, long luxurious scented(Ylang Ylang,Lavender,Jasmin,Sandlewood) oiled,mineral bubble baths, talking OPENLY and honestly about EVERYTHING. SHOUTING (alone in a park or backyard or alone in the house). Of course, cuddling.......and sex(obviously)alone OR with a partner  | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/11/2007 9:24:32 AM | OP try a few drops of rescue remedy in a glass of water. Take a few times throughout the day. You can get rescue remedy ( or any of the Bach Flowers ) at health food stores.
Best to you. | |
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M.I.
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Joined: 2/2/2007
Msg: 15 | |
| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/11/2007 5:21:27 PM | ^^ Sounds like someone not getting enough sleep at night.
If stress is continually involving your sleep for that long that you need to nap during the day, it would be worth looking into remedying the cause, rather than treating the symptom. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/13/2007 3:41:09 AM | | walk, walk, walk... and eat well...when bad thoughts intrude concentrate on good times thoughts. i have been through seriously bad times and this works believe me and take a multivitamin..sounds weird but true | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/13/2007 6:35:24 PM | Some good ideas here... also don't forget the simple HOT bath. You may also check into aromatherapy, yoga, prayer, walking. In other words, getting away from people awhile or at least minimal contact. That seems to help more than anything  | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/15/2007 8:33:43 AM | | Get yourself a puppy. When your stressed out, you simply pet the pup and it will immediately begin to relieve the built up tension. Its as tho all the stress is sucked out of you and into the puppy , where it is purified and changed into positively charged energy. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/17/2007 8:40:06 AM | Zero Caffeine - Helps a lot!
Deep Breathing exercises.
Verbalize your worries (to yourself) before bed, and envision putting them in a big black boxs and closing the lid for the night. You're not forgeting your troubles, you're putting them away for the night and getting them back out in the morning.
Write down your concerns and priorotize them. Be proactive. Set up some approach for dealing with them, or realize what is beyond your control. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 7/17/2007 9:12:22 AM | OP I will say that it's good to put a combination of different things together. I find that meditation helps, and also walking alot is good....it helps one sleep better , as does meditation. It's good to consult your doctor about this as well,....as I am sure they could help you in some ways, not only medically, but I'm sure in practical advice also. Sometimes there comes time where you have to make time you and just make sure that you get the Time out that you need before you continue on.
Also I think it is good that you are sharing this with us....because I think that is one of the first steps on dealing with this issue as it invites others to bring in their opinions in and it has others aware of this who have perhapes gone through this or are going through this now, so it's great that you are letting others know about this.....again it's a great first step.
Good luck and I hope you get well soon. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 8/13/2007 4:07:07 PM | Simultaneously -- doing something to boost the mind, such as taking up a beginner's meditation course or just some quiet reflection or reading (something uplifting) self time, something for the body consistently, such as a cardio form of fitness you might enjoy, eating a healthy diet (foods affect mood), having someone that you can share your burden/s with (such as a counselor), and having others you can just purely socialize with to take your mind off of things for a little...
Wishing you the best... | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 8/18/2007 7:25:20 PM | I agree...For me, Tibetan Relaxation: Kum Nye Massage and Movement are ideal...And what Hydrogen says... | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 8/18/2007 11:34:11 PM |
Get yourself a puppy. When your stressed out, you simply pet the pup and it will immediately begin to relieve the built up tension. Its as tho all the stress is sucked out of you and into the puppy , where it is purified and changed into positively charged energy While true petting an animal can help with stress, it is also a pretty serious committment. You can't just buy a puppy and take it back when the things causing you stress get better. Plus puppies are pretty high maintenance. You have to walk them several times a day and train them and all sorts of stuff, plus make sure they get fed regularly, and based on what someone said about the OP's posting history regarding what's going on with him, I'm not sure a puppy would be the best idea here.
Little things could help though, like making sure you're eating properly and getting exercize. Aromatherapy can be helpful. Massages are great too. | |
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| Ways to relieve some major stress
Posted: 9/4/2007 6:33:00 PM | It may sound obscure but try it, I promise you it works...
Two hours before you routinely go to bed eat a couple of lettuce sandwiches, absolutely pack them with leaves though & drink camomile tea, this will induce sleep, when you have a pet rabbit the vet's advise is not to fed them too much letuce as there is a chemical in the leaves that'll make it sleepy. I do this myself when I feel the need & I know I'll sleep like a log.
As for when you feel stressed during the day, regularly take exersize - it releases feel good chemicals in the brain calming you down & destressing you. Nutrition plays a key role in the body's ability to cope with stress too, eat oily fish, nuts & seeds to get your omega oils which again release chemicals in the brain to uplift your mood also green leafy vegetables.
I look at it in 3 ways, my body needs rest, my body needs fuel for energy and my brain needs feeding. Eat, sleep & exersize well & the stress won't go away but will be easier to cope with. I hope this helps you, all the best, take care  | |
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