| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/12/2007 11:26:50 PM | | i done some searching and i have not seen this question exactly ... and i dont honestly mean at all to be offending anyone . just something i have always wanted to understand .... i see all these interracial relationships and i see alot of ad's that .. people have a preference either just their own race or outside their own race and thats it .... what i want to understand here ..... is why someone would only have a preference of other races besides their own? ... and why is it . someone will only date their own race? ... is their a difference? ... last i seen we all bleed the same .. and we are all human .. i have no preferences of race myself i can certainly find someone attractive .. outside my own race and i wouldnt have a problem with it ... just puzzles me as to why? .. we are people so closed minded? ... . .. have we had bad experiences with one race and decide they are all the same? .. because no matter how you look at it .. we are all equal ... people act difference of every shape size and color .... can someone tell me so i understand what is so different or better about one race to the next? . | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/12/2007 11:43:44 PM | | I agree, OP... sadly racism is alive and well. There is nothing wrong with one versus another, just individual predjudices by some people. I've dated within and outside of my race and its a non-issue in my book. Good people are good people, regardless of race or ethnicity. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 12:25:19 AM | | I think people are usually attracted to opposites since seem more exotic, but in the end I believe people like certain traits or characterisics of people across nationalities. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 12:40:21 AM | That is a toughie to understand isn't it?
well there re those people who are like that...
Then there are those people who will look beyond the boundries of such things nd hen they'll find love, they'll find love regrdless of who or ht they look like. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 1:02:46 AM | | some of it has to do with cultural and social norms of attractiveness. For example, those of African descent might prize a ghetto booty because it is more common in their genetic make up. An Asian on the other hand might look at the ghetto booty with disdain because it is unheard of in their culture to have a large behind. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 4:37:50 AM | | My only guess to people who dig their own race, it's just their preference. Me being in college I see people looking for what "looks" like them first, then maybe they wond branch out, I am definitely with you on the same thing though, on the discovery channel they said basically we are the same thing. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 5:46:01 AM | There is nothing better about any one race. There are differences. Sometimes we choose to be with someone of another race because of our past experiences. Sometimes because we want something "different". My best experiences have been with men of a different race than my own. I'm attracted to men of a different race. Who knows why that is sometimes the case?
Some are only attracted to members of their own race, which is understandable. Some are afraid to cross the racial lines, because of what "people will think". Preferring someone of another race in no way diminishes your respect for your own race, at least in my case it doesn't. Only in the narrow minds of others.
Trying to figure out how or why people make the choices they make is a futile undertaking, and serves no point. Some people have preferences of height, body types, hair color, etc. No different than preferring a certain race or ethnicity. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 6:11:53 AM | Thankfully my Mum (who's white English) and my Dad (who's black Caribbean) both dated outside of their races or I would be non-existent!
OP, i like your philosophy very much! However, dating somebody of only one particular race is not necessarily racist (it can be of course). Some people like yourself may be attracted to a whole kaleidoscope of people whereas for others, physical attraction may veer only toward dark, fair etc etc. I hear a lot of talk about 'it's what's inside that counts' and I agree but we cannot force ourselves to be physically attracted to someone we're not.
What I don't agree with is people criticising (or worse) their friends and family for dating outside of their races. This is racist and this is wrong! | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 6:44:06 AM | | I agree with the Op. I have lately been dating outside my race, but I have no problem dating my own race as well. To me i go by attaction, not the race. I honestly dont have a prefernce in race. In this day and age, I will just take someone Im compatable with, I dont care if they are purple. | |
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El Efe
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Joined: 12/7/2006
Msg: 10 | |
| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 7:55:42 AM | I'm so mixed up I don't really have a "race." I'm an "other."
I guess that means all of my relationships are interracial.
I do agree with you though, Harley. We are all pretty much the same and it merely comes down to personal preference.
Love,
F. | |
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ddream
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Joined: 8/24/2006
Msg: 11 | |
| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 8:04:02 AM | Well, like I said before we live in the 21st century but all the people that won't date outside their race are still stuck in the middle ages if you ask me.. But the main problem is when racist people do get children, the hatred reflects on their children too and that my friend keeps the racism flowing... No matter what we do..
I don't like it as much as you probably do, but the only thing we can do is be ourselves so that the world gets a little bit better every time and racism is eventually banned.. !  Dang I'm tired and make a lot of typos today.. I guess it's time to give it a rest.. LOL | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 8:19:51 AM | | I had always been a multicultural dater - I see the person not the colour - I choose my husband because he was the sweetest - most honest most caring man I had dated and we fell deeply in love! When dating, I did tend to date more black men, as that is my preference but not a priority!!! The virtue of their character was how I choose the men I had in my life!!! | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 8:27:57 AM | I am attracted to any beautiful woman who takes care of herself....i do find that asian and black women drive me crazy and i am really attracted to them....but i have been with women from damn near every race on the planet.
It's mutual attraction...i know so many ppl that say they wont date outside thier race just to turn around and do it or have a onenite stand with someone from a different race.
It's just us being human...we dont like critisism so we dont date outside our race because of how our immediate society looks at us...so we go with thier flow...to fit in...not thinking of our own happiness.
Then we have the sexual side...the side that is turned on because in society it is taboo so to speak...the fact we like it but dont want our friends and nieghbors to know.
Me,i dont care what anyone thinks,if i meet someone and she makes me happy and i make her happy,then we are toghether....if my friends and family don't like it they dont have to come around...right.
Maybe someday the human race will mature and it wont be an issue anymore.Maybe. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 8:48:35 AM | Um.. excuse me please. Call me a racist as I won't date outside my race... the HUMAN race. We are all just people. We bleed the same color blood. We breath and procreate in the same way. We walk on two feet (generally speaking.. altho I have seen some knuckle dragging going on lately with some). The fact that we come in different shapes, sizes, colors is irrelevant. Those things just make life interesting.
The world would be a much happier place if we could all learn this, and accept it and carry on with life. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 11:42:46 AM | | i am totally accepting to the interracial dating .. and so on ... it just puzzles me how people can act .. even here locally alot of women i have associated with have one set preference out of their race .... the usual is ... white woman /african american male .... they just dont open their mind to any other direction and i have asked ... and alot of them told me they had bad experiences with people of their own race ... for instance .. drugs, abusive relationships, claiming that ... one race would treat and does treat them better than the other and so on. ..... to me that can happen anywhere with the abuse and being mistreated ... anywhere with any one ... i still besides closed minds there seems tp ne alot of confusion ...... out there with people not knowing what they want anyway lol . | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 4:28:45 PM | maybe some people prefer exotic ,me for instance i love asians why? well they have soft skin and are short( i'm short too 5'6 ) and thoses eyes mmmmmmmm asian eyes i dont know why but i feel atractive to asian eyes ( i have ocean blue eyes) for me its like haveing a exotic fruit . well trying to get one atleast hahahhahah i even speak mandrin:)
ni ho ma
wo ani
wo xiang ni
wan an
yeaa i'm learning chinise:) maybe will benefit me if any asian ladys will like to date me :) | |
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wafta
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Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 17 | |
| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/13/2007 4:37:41 PM | So, why is it ok for someone to say they prefer tall/short or blonde/brunette or slim/large or anything else along those lines, but not to say you prefer black men/asian men, etc.?
Its all the same ball game, its simply about what attracts you physically. Its the people who make a "race" issue out of such things that have the problem in my opinion.
Men who don't like the fact that I prefer black men often say they prefer petite blonde women, what's the difference?? | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 8:08:24 AM | | Wafta - there is no difference though I did see a male poster getting a hard time recently because he said he's not attracted to overweight women so doesn't apply just to race. Live and let live...my motto (and most posters here which is good). Not so with all! | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 8:53:05 AM | | I agree totally. Caucasian males are my preference and it has a lot to do with previous experiences as well as I love the look. For me there has been a distinct difference in treatment. Some people may not understand this or be offended by it, but it is my right. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 9:26:31 AM | Preference for your own race only I attribute to either social factors (racist environment) or simple lack of exposure to other races as your ideas of attraction developped.
Preference for other races I attribute to rebellion in a racist environment, and there is also the genetic factor....... Humans thrive on diversity, diverse genes help us as a species, so if an "exotic" person is available they will offer an infusion of many new traits to your "tribe" which could benefit that group.
Too be honest I was raised in a mostly white environment, and the minority people in that area were all pretty good people, certainly no worse than anyone else, so I grew up pretty much "colour-blind". I don't think I'd be pleased to find out someone I had dated was interested in me BECAUSE I'm white. Finding whites, asians, black, natives whatever attractive or even more attractive than others isn't a crime it is simply preference.
But OP you are correct limiting your choices in this way doesn't make much sense, and I can't understand it myself. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 9:30:15 AM | | I've always been very attracted to women of color. I have always been this way. Maybe it has a lot to do with growing up in a small mono-color town in Canada. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 10:33:18 AM | You can't say its purely skin color. For one thing, its also hair color, texture, eye color, facial features, body proportions, etc. Theres alot more physical differences than color. Why do you think Africans are the world's fasted runners? East Africans tend to be leaner and meaner than other races. Thats just one example.
Also there is culture. Sure, in our incresingly homogenized world culture is becoming one mass marketed glob (McDonalds, Nike, MTV etc). But people still tend to hold on to at least part of the culture of their parents and grandparents. This means different ways of looking at the world. Muslims tend to more conservative than Scandinavians etc. If you go for liberal traits in a mate, you'll tend to shoose a Swede over an Arab. And whats wrong with that?
Yes there are exceptions, but "preferences" dont mean "limitations". Just because you prefer people from one particular cultural group, it dosent mean you wouldent jump at the chance if the appealing personality traits were found in someone of a culture who tends to hold the opposite trait. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 12:24:56 PM | | people tend to be attracted to other races whether they admit it or not,most people hopefully will look at a person as just that and not as a color,i have dated outside my race asnd will continue to do so because i wasnt raised to be prejudice,its nice to be able to have a choice in who you prefer to date regardless of what society says is acceptable behavior.i can care less about all the stares that i get,i look at the person and the personality regardless of who it is. | |
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| question about interracial dating ...
Posted: 4/14/2007 12:31:28 PM | I think everyone is the same... whether they are white, black, hispanic.... and so on....
But the difference is we all get caught up in the excitement of something different, that's what all the rage is about ineracial sex & dating... They just want to try something different see if there is something else out there for them. | |
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