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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?      Home login  
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 Randominternetguy
Joined: 12/25/2006
Msg: 1
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?Page 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I've seen a few profiles recently where the member has identified themself as a hopeless romantic, or , ala Joan Wilder, hopeful romantic. It got me thinking ...

When you read a profile, and see that person has listed themself as a hopeless/hopeful romantic, do you see that as a positive or negative trait? Or it doesn't matter?

Also, would/do you have that in your profile?

Bob
 VeddiVeddiVixxen
Joined: 3/27/2007
Msg: 2
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 3:51:51 PM
I think it depends on the tone of the overall profile as to how that might come across.
 Alpengeist
Joined: 1/30/2006
Msg: 3
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 4:22:18 PM
overbearing, needy, no.
wanting good time romance, yes.
the overall tone of hopeless romantic is not a bad one, unless it's in the hands of someone imbalanced,
 Wylie_Coyote
Joined: 5/12/2007
Msg: 4
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 4:37:44 PM
Bob,

A true hopeless romantic is someone that is looking for something that they have had and lost. A connection with a partner that is on so many levels that you can anticipate what they are thinking and even the responses to questions. You always know what they are thinking as they do you.I have had entire conversations without spoken words. “F”ed up hugh? Only about 10% of guys can ever relate to this….

I don't list this on my page because I think it can only be found when you aren't looking for it.

John
 Sigi
Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 5
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 5:48:20 PM

Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?


Hmm...I tend so say minus when reading 'hopeless/hopeful' romantic. Somehow it just makes me wonder....what is the intention/'purpose' of mentioning this in your profile. Especially when added the candlelight diners (first dates), flowers and romantic beach walks. What's so hopeless /hopeful romantic about that...what does it 'prove'?

Just let me find out myself if I find you romantic.
 migivadamsbusted
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 6
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 5:54:50 PM
gosh I love a romantic! most men I've come across don't know the meaning of the word!
 dawn1114
Joined: 2/27/2006
Msg: 7
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 5:56:16 PM
It's a minus for me personally (because I'm a hopelessly unromantic type), but I don't think it's a bad thing per se. If it's obvious the person writing the profile has latched on to it as a catch phrase, I consider it kind of lame. If their profile seems to indicate they truly ARE a romantic type, I find it a bit endearing and wish them well in finding someone the same. But it won't be me.
 *cee~cee*
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 8
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:00:04 PM
Depends on their definition of romantic. I agree with the person that said if it comes across needy or clingy then it's a negative for sure. And to me, romance isn't about flowers, chocolates, or other 'material' things. It's about the simple things in everyday life that you say or do that makes someone know they're appreciated and loved. From a knowing glance or a personal 'joke' that only the two of you 'get' or a gesture/effort made that's just that weeeee bit extra.

I'm not romantic in the traditional sense ... but I have a sentimental side that comes out every so often. Some would say I'm not romantic... and perhaps I'm not to the traditionalists... but I am according to my own definition. However, no, I wouldn't put that in my profile... cause when I meet the right guy for me, he'll just find that out! I don't necessarily think it's a selling point, but it could be to some. If I saw it in someone's profile, I'd have to read the whole thing and hope something in there indicates what their definition of romantic is.
 Sigi
Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 9
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:09:26 PM

It's about the simple things in everyday life that you say or do that makes someone know they're appreciated and loved. From a knowing glance or a personal 'joke' that only the two of you 'get' or a gesture/effort made that's just that weeeee bit extra.


Depeche gurl...would have liked to add that to my post. Actually your whole post !
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 10
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:12:14 PM
Romantic is too individual to be a catch-all, plus it's up to the other person to determine for themselves whether they consider you romantic or not.
Hopless...ugh, a negative, hopeful sorta redundant. Aren't people here hoping for something, someone. Some things don't need to be said.
 Ron9
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 11
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:15:55 PM
That is one of the things that I don’t pay much attention to.

That and other ... space fillers - like ...

All the miswest gals talking about walks on the beach - xcuse me WHERE.
 Sigi
Joined: 5/26/2005
Msg: 12
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:39:57 PM

All the miswest gals talking about walks on the beach - xcuse me WHERE.


Shock...I live by the beach....and I didn't even mention 'romantic walks on the beach' as one of my interests.....
 AnnudderVoice
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 13
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:46:23 PM
I'm pretty sure I'm a romantic, hopeless or not I'm not sure.

But I think all the "hopeless" ones simply mean that they love romance.

And that's a good thing in my book.

Annudder
 Not just a member
Joined: 9/14/2005
Msg: 14
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 6:57:51 PM
Without hope, a person or idea will wither and die. I don't want romance to die. So I guess I am hopeful; that romance is alive and well, and someday I may find it again.
I think it is a positive thing. It means bitterness has not taken hold....
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 15
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 7:11:36 PM
Hopeless romantic - well I'm one - so I'm kind of biased about this topic. However I do love a man that is romantic as if/when you get to intimacy - it is very hot.

However, I have met some men who said they were hopeless romantics and they were far from it. Some think that by using that phrase it allows them to grope you and try and pass that off as being a touchie feelie kind of guy - well fella touchie feel yourself

Then you have the others who say they are romantic and like to hold hands when they appear to be very desperate and instead of holding a lady's hand - grip it like a vice and ones mind automatically races to "OMG handcuffs"

And one must not forget the men who also use this as foreplay thinking that it will get you in the sack with them. Sorry guys, I'm blonde but not always dumb.....
 Cort1295
Joined: 12/26/2006
Msg: 16
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 7:15:21 PM
I see it as a positive, as long as they have a realistic understanding of romance and the expression of love. If they're a walking cliche that isn't open to new or creative ideas, it's kind of a bust. An ex. drove me crazy taking any gesture I'd make for granted if it didn't fit into the calm candle-lit dinner or picnic for two in the park mindset, and it was more aggravating than anything else.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 17
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 7:21:08 PM
Most people appreciate romance but when I read it in a profile, I tend to wonder why the individual feels the need to express this at that point, because he thinks it is what women want to hear, or because he really is? I think most truly romantic people, whether women or men, do not feel the need to announce it but communicate it in the things that they do for the person whom they care about. Romance is a component of kindness and consideration and while sometimes planned, it is not contrived.

Ron, they do have lakes in the midwest.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 18
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 7:32:49 PM
"Romance is a component of kindness and consideration and while sometimes planned, it is not contrived." Very well said. Romance like many things is very personal, and better experienced than talked about. There's the generic romance, but buying a man/woman flowers, cards and chocolates doesn't automatically make anyone a romantic person.
"Ron, they do have lakes in the midwest. " I live in central Florida, 10 minutes from some of the most beautiful beaches. I love a walk on the beach in the early evening or at night, it's cool and refreshing, always a breeze. I have never, ever put that on my profile, though. Not because it was overdone, just something I wouldn't do on a first date. It's a shame that something so many people actually enjoy and do has to be relegated to being a cliche.
 lucky13
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 19
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 8:36:54 PM
The only reason I don’t have anything about being a romantic in my profile is because I don’t want a storybook profile. Theirs nothing wrong with being a hopeless/hopeful romantic. Lots of people have different definitions of what a hopeless or hopeful romantic is. One person might think it’s reading poetry while another may think it’s flying to France for dinner. Being romantic can be as simple as leaving a note in your lovahhh’s pocket that says I'm thinking of you. It’s knowing the other person like you know yourself. It’s letting them know theirs no one more special.
To me being a hopeless/hopeful romantic means getting out of myself and doing something just for her that says I love you.
I’ve learned over the years that trying to bring romance back into a relationship after it’s gone sour is a waste of time. You have to both want it for it to exist. After that you become a hopeless romantic looking for that same high. You date a lot of different women, join dating sites, go on blind dates…looking for the one, but also knowing you may never find her.
 Harry Peter
Joined: 12/25/2006
Msg: 20
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 9:53:59 PM

When you read a profile, and see that person has listed themself as a hopeless/hopeful romantic, do you see that as a positive or negative trait? Or it doesn't matter?


Neither. It's like saying you have two arms and two legs. Does having two arms and two legs make the person a bad or good catch? Same with hopeless romantic. Too general.


Also, would/do you have that in your profile?


Would I? Can't think of a reason to. Do I? No.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 21
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 10:48:17 PM

Hmm...I tend so say minus when reading 'hopeless/hopeful' romantic. Somehow it just makes me wonder....what is the intention/'purpose' of mentioning this in your profile. Especially when added the candlelight diners (first dates), flowers and romantic beach walks. What's so hopeless /hopeful romantic about that...what does it 'prove'?


Ahhhhh yes ~ walking in beaches, hiking, candle-lit dinners and cuddling. I often wonder where someone from Ohio is going to take me on a first date, I don't recall an ocean there, but I may be wrong. Seriously ~ it's so grossly overused that I get to those lines and skim to the "my children are my life" and then straight to "but I want to be friends first" from there, it's a given ~ "let's not waste time emailing, I'm here to meet someone." That's usually when I giggle and click to the very same verbage on the next profile.

~OT~ Those are HUGE red-flags for me personally. I am a very subtle romance person. Less is more for me. Little winks win my heart much quicker than roses, wine, beaches and public displays of admiration. Those things make me feel pressured and uncomfortable, unless the relationship is well established and thriving. I need the little things first ~ give me a romantic production if we make it a year or two....that is a call for celebration, at least in my world!!!
 mystymorn
Joined: 2/12/2007
Msg: 22
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 10:53:07 PM
By reading your profile Annudder I would say yes you are a romantic...and when men can say that in front of everyone is a very good thing...always the romantic here...hopelessly or not
 Charlie Shift
Joined: 12/5/2006
Msg: 23
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 11:02:05 PM
I don't remember ever reading a man's profile in which he said he was a hopeful romantic, but I've seen "hopeless romantic". I thought it meant that he would always be a romantic no matter what happened in his life and I never thought about it meaning anything else. The phrase itself didn't mean much to me and was a tad negative in that I felt like it was one of those overused phrases seen on profiles.

Was he really a romantic? I don't know. Don't think I ever got to know any of those guys. I tend to think he's trying to say something to appeal to women rather than letting us know who he really is. And, yes, I understand that it's not so easy for y'all to figure out what to say to us to get our attention.
 onwaves
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 24
Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 11:10:10 PM
Hopeless romantic equals desperate in my view. Of course we all want that special person in our lives and we can use the word 'hopeless romantic' to decribe ourselves for that, but there is a difference between wanting to be in love or wanting to be with someone.
 Change Of Pace
Joined: 5/5/2007
Msg: 25
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Hopeless (or hopeful) romantic in profiles - Plus or Minus?
Posted: 5/19/2007 11:16:05 PM
Quite often you see 'hopeless' romantic in one portion of the profile and then interests that would take away from that completely. I also love it when you get a 'hopeless romantic' open a message in a really rude fashion...go figure. Kind of like the girls with the provocative pics complaining they never meet nice men.
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