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 JustMe1819
Joined: 12/18/2003
Msg: 1
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?Page 1 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Kinda a stupid question but what I mean is, if you are in a relationship with someone and you are having a lot of problems, but the sex is great, should that be one of the deciding factors on whether you should try harder or not? I dont mean that you should stay for just the sex, but it can be very difficult to find someone that you are sexually compatible with. What do you all think!
 Vancer
Joined: 10/29/2006
Msg: 2
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 4:36:40 PM
The human sex drive is very unstable.
I'd say it'll just be delaying the inevitable.
But that's just my opinion!

/me backflips out of topic off a cliff
 fun_tall
Joined: 11/3/2005
Msg: 3
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 4:40:16 PM
I would think it would be kinda hard to do each other knowing you can't stand each others guts! Never heard of 'great sex' keeping two people together in a relationship. What kinda relationship is it then? Sexual?

I mean.....what do you say to each other " Yo, am horny, time to do it.....I only have 15 mins and then I have to go get a beer with my buddies. You in or shall I re-schedule?"
 Nick Thinker
Joined: 2/10/2007
Msg: 4
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 4:53:31 PM
Can sex keep me in a relationship?
Maybe. It depends. It has and it has not kept me!
 Tysta
Joined: 4/10/2007
Msg: 5
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 5:03:07 PM
Nope. I like to think and hold onto "I haven't had the best sex of my life" yet. I can't have good sex with someone i'm unhappy with anyway. It's as much psychological as physical for me.

C~
 lonestardaddy
Joined: 11/18/2006
Msg: 6
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 5:05:10 PM
Missie, More inane questions have been asked here, and I've yet to be in a relationship that didn't have its problems. Don't equate sex w/ love and understanding ...other than your partner likely knowing which buttons of yours to push in bed. If you and your partner go around and around for the same issues out of the b/r, ask yourself whether or not you can foresee yourself joined at the hip (side-by-side) in the future for a workable life together. If the answer is "No", it's time to look for a compatible-in-other-areas/interests/and dirction partner. You can go about teaching new tricks in the b/r ...if not not learn a few more to have fantastic, mind-boggling sex.
 angelous915
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 7
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 5:25:09 PM
i dont think so i think have affection or love for a person can sustain the relationship cause things can go bad for couples but if you have that genuine love or affection for that person you can fall back on that
 backnblack
Joined: 10/17/2006
Msg: 8
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 5:28:04 PM
Are you looking for problems? You say that there really arent and your having good sex, i think you just want to rub our noses in your bliss lol
 backnblack
Joined: 10/17/2006
Msg: 9
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 5:29:25 PM
OMG i apologize i cant read sorry and no you should stay just for sex !!!!!!!
 junipermoon
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 10
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 6:12:58 PM
if you find someone too annoying, your vagina slams shut and refuses to open.

if it hasn't done that, you're probably ok and the relationship is salvageable.
 whothehellknows
Joined: 7/23/2006
Msg: 11
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 6:33:22 PM
Good sex has kept me in more than one relationship after I saw the writing on the wall. In the end it will always end, but enjoy the benefits while you can.
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 12
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 6:36:46 PM
I was in a relationship like this and I stayed
very long- I will never ever do that again.
That is the only thing that was left of that
relationship- It was bad. Its not worth it - at the end I felt
completely detached from him when we were together-
like nothing. It was not going through the motions feeling
just a feeling of hurt - that I knew when he touched me it was
not because he loved me.
I think everyone is sexually compatable when you find someone
you connect with - I do not believe for a minute you love each other
and the sex sucks- the sex is great because you do love
each other and it comes through.
 onesimpleneed
Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 13
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 7:07:18 PM
Only if she refuses to give me the keys to the handcuffs...you can't get up and walk around naked chained to a king sized bed....lord knows...I've tried!

Sex isn't any good if that is all there is. If that is all there is, it is just f u cking.
 2matchingsocks
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 14
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 7:08:58 PM
If sex is all that's left....I'm outta there. To me the other aspects of a relationship are much more important. Without those in place, sex alone isn't going to do it for me.
 K-lo
Joined: 7/31/2006
Msg: 15
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 9:05:30 PM
I wondered the same thing once. And, I actually did consciously think about how much I would miss the consistent, good, reliable sex should we break up. But, it's not just about staying FOR the sex, because the sex is and has always been more than just "sex" - - it's the way you have physically bonded with someone you cared about for how ever many years, and it's part of the package of being "comfortable" with someone. So, it might be less that you are afraid of never finding someone else you are sexually compatible with, and moreso, you're afraid of giving up comfortability - with all of its dysfunctions AND perks.

But, if you find that sex is (ultimately) the solution to your problems with your man . . for instance, you and he are fighting over a problem - and although you never really resolve it, you still have sex and that closeness makes you feel like all is OK again and the problem is resolved (at least for the moment) . . . then I think it is the sex itself that is actually PREVENTING you from trying harder to make the relationship whole. If sex is your "fixer" - then the problems will never be fixed. You should try it out and see what happens when you try to resolve a problem without falling back on sex as the cure-all. Sex is a great way to actually avoid "trying" at all.

So, if you still desire each other, sexually, and the sex makes you feel bonded (which, if it didn't in some way, then it would suck), then, sure, it's a factor to consider when determining whether to continue working on the relationship. BUT, then WORK on the relationship. Don't use sex as the crutch that allows both of you to ignore the issues that don't go so smoothly.
 Tigress
Joined: 4/11/2004
Msg: 16
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:28:09 PM
It wouldn't make me stay, but it might make me stay a little longer!
 chackboom
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 17
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/7/2007 10:58:24 PM
Only for human, sex is for relationship and offspring. For all other aminals, sex or mate is only for offspring.
 mochawoman
Joined: 5/18/2007
Msg: 18
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 4:00:32 AM
I've been going through that exact scenario for the past 2 1/2 years. If the sex wasn't so good, it would be easier to walk away from this person. It takes me a little time to really cut loose sexually with a man, but when we mesh, lookout. lol. But I'm hoping one day that someone will just take me off this rollercoaster ride with this person and soon, because I miss having a "normal" relationship.
 man with ad
Joined: 6/5/2007
Msg: 19
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 5:19:07 AM
As a woman you can easily find a man to have sex with. Sexual compatibility is far easier to find than a match up of personalities or whatever else. There is no reason to stay with a man if you have problems, unless it is the problems that you like in the first place.

As a man, finding a woman to have sex with is difficult. This is why women have been able to get men to marry them all these years and why marriage works out about half the time.

I would not stay in a relationship for sex if there were problems. I would solve the problems or end the relationship. One of the reasons some people even have relationships is to have a source of drama to wrestle their demons. I would rather wrestle an angel, so to speak.
 Gotmail?
Joined: 7/24/2006
Msg: 20
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 5:54:57 AM
Sex is NOT everything.

I REPEAT.........Sex cannot be everything.

If you are not FRIENDS, IF you cannot have fun, IF you cannot resolve conflict, IF you want totally different things in life, and IF you are sexual but not intimate, in other ways.

Then walk, it is JUST sex.

Intimacy is key...............unless you are a very closed person, bc I have a friend who is and she keeps her man at arms length, but she does NOT seem happy or fulfilled either, and all they do is fight and drink and have sex. Not my idea of living, mind you.
 ImJustMeKevin
Joined: 2/20/2007
Msg: 21
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Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 9:12:05 AM
Sounds like an FB to me. Save yourself the heart ache and seperate and just keep the FB portion going while you look for a better match IMO. GL, situations like that are very difficult even without the awesome sex to confuse the brain/emotions.

Kevin
 Niceguy1959J
Joined: 12/5/2006
Msg: 22
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 9:22:20 AM
I have noticed good marriages have one thing in common and that is the women is well satisfied! If the women is not happy sexually the marriage will end sooner or later that is just the way it is they have the freedom to leave and find fulfillment somewhere else. The man are usually happy with the sex they get it is the women who want more and better. But I think it is the way it should be everyone has a right to happiness.
 mrskeme745
Joined: 3/24/2004
Msg: 23
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 9:31:42 AM
If the relationship was dead and the only thing keeping me there was sex, then i would be there for as long as i was addicted to the sex she was giving up. I get bored of the same old **** easily, if i havent any feeling for her, so it would only be a matter of time before she was replaced with fresh new ****
 hockeygal07
Joined: 4/2/2007
Msg: 24
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2007 9:32:52 AM
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Been there.....done that. Great sex can be a motivator for working out the other issues/problems that you are having. Sometimes things will work out....sometimes not but at least you are having sex (great sex) while you sort things out.
 almstprfct1
Joined: 5/17/2007
Msg: 25
Can sex keep you in a relationship?
Posted: 6/23/2007 4:44:39 PM
My experience is that "good sex" is something that very few women have ever experienced. A man that has the ability to please a women with orgasms that can last for several minutes and leave her speachless and shaking ....before he even thinks of actually copulating with her is worth his weight in gold! Now as I said this is only my experience..maybe some ladies out there actually hate this kind of thing and would much rather have a man that has to ask her if it was good as opposed to one that teases her be making her tell him how good it was when she is physically unable to do so. Of course this kind of personal care and attention for me ideally comes from two people both have a connection and a commitment...daily nurtered to their creator whereby they live a life of service to their God and the people he places in their lives. In this day and age everyone is so concerned with getting theirs. Nowhere is this more apparent than in bed. "Good sex" always revolves around pleasing your partner...or if you are so inclined...partners.Which would lead us to a whole new topic and my fingers are tired....On my planet we say, Thanks for letting me share, Travis
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