| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 7:44:20 AM | I've spoken with so many guys on here who think that just because of the numbers (and I've yet to see any official ratios of men:women here!) that women have a much easier time of it than men do.
The truth is, I see the same guys pop up in that little strip above my inbox almost everytime I sign in, so there just aren't that many guys around right? Otherwise I'd see more variety.
And sure, when you first sign up there's a little flurry of emails that come in - a new face - yeah...let's pounce. Then every 30 days as they forget they've ever contacted you so wind up sending exactly the same message again....
Anyway, guys, it isn't all that easy for us either. Otherwise I wouldn't be back here. Or on the other dating sites I've been on. Perhaps you might understand the frustrations of a woman, well this particular woman anyway, by reading what I have below. It's a blog that I wrote on another space, I mean place  a few weeks ago, basically expressing my frustration with the way I was being approached.
Read, and learn... and maybe you'll be able to find that girl you're looking for. 
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"I WANT A LITTLE WOO WITH MY HOO"
I've been thinking about this blog for weeks. A few of you know about it already, with me having vented my frustrations on you. Originally the blog was titled "Hey Baby, Wanna F***?", which of course is about the most frequently used introductory phrase on the internet. Or some variation of that at least. I'm pretty tired of getting those messages. Really boys. Give up.
Somewhere along the way, men seem to have lost the ability to woo a woman, perhaps simply because we are not demanding it. Sad really, because as much as I like the "woohoo", I really miss the woo... I really want the woo... old fashioned maybe, but oh soooo good. A woman wants to be charmed, enchanted, swept off her feet. Hell yeah, I want a little romance.
If you think sending me the message promising to be the answer to my prayers will give me hope, you're wrong. I'm an atheist - I don't pray.
If you think I'm horny, and you sending me a message telling me what a stud you are will get you in, you're wrong. Yes, I am. And no, I don't think you're a stud, I think you're a jerk.
No, I am not going to show you my "titties". Or my breasts even.
No, I am not going to discuss my pu$sy. Unless you're talking about my cat Tiger, who is an absolute riot.
No, I am not going to "hook up wit u". Or even meet you, if you can't speak English properly.
No, I am not going to let you "blow my mind". Or anything else.
Please don't call me "sexc". Learn to spell.
Yes I have a webcam. No, I am not going to share it with you. It's only for very close friends, and then I want to see their face while I'm chatting with them. I want to see them smile, and laugh. Yes, really.
Yes, I will let you talk to me. And be my friend. And perhaps eventually invite me out to woo me.
And if we're very lucky, perhaps we'll both find WooHoo.
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 8:19:45 AM | I totally agree CC
and if they are not saying all the above, They expect you to continue the conversation? Not all the guys I talk to mind you, some are the best, but about 60% of the mail I get.
Then every 30 days as they forget they've ever contacted you so wind up sending exactly the same message again....
This particular one made me smile. A guy who hasn't spoken to me for 2 weeks messaged me again tonight. "Got any pics?" I reminded him I had actually sent him 2 two weeks ago was met with the response (after an apparently respectable pause) "I didn't get them". (U damn well did because I sent them through messenger and you told me you did? )
Guys? If you want to win or woo or wit woo a woman? My top 10
1. 2. & 3. Make some damn conversation! (women are socialized to do that crap). If you talk to us in monosyllables we get bored after 20 minutes. (Some quicker!)
4. DO NOT ask us if we have a "cam baby" on the first conversation you have with us. (Oh and I am over 40, hardly a baby)
5. Don't ask us what our favourite sexual position is, and what kind of things did we do with or ex? (yep, I REALLY had a guy ask me that 10 minutes into our first conversation)
6. Don't call any woman "baby" if she is over 30 (unless you are in the throes of sexual ecstasy and we are screaming "call me baby") - see 4
7. Get to know a woman, talk to her, LISTEN to her. It's called communication.
8. Don't expect us to listen to a 3 hour monolouge about what a b**ch your ex was. Ours were ba****ds. Most of us are not after your money, house, boat. Okay? Save it for later?
9. Most of us are lonely. That's why we are here?
and
10. See 1. 2 & 3.
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 3:54:35 PM | Absolutely you two.
I recently went for coffee with man I met through this site. He was one hour late because he had to help his mate fix his trailer. When I later expressed that I thought it was impolite to be late for a first date he started abusing me, calling me controlling, a woman who doesn't know whats important, even called me a drill sergeant. Geez. Whatever happened to plain old fashioned good manners? Pardon me for having standards.
Throughout the course of the coffee it was quite obvious he was seething with unresolved anger for the ex, a condition which I can sympathise with but have moved past that stage and wouldn't have considered dating someone whilst I was in the throes of it. Does a single mother really want to sit and listen to a rant about how women think its their God-given right to stay home with their children? Um, excuse me, I am home with my children, didn't you read my profile.
This is just one example of my dating experiences but there are so many more. Its enough to make you want to throw in the towel sometimes. | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 4:36:29 PM | Now I don't feel so bad,it's not just me that has had some of these experiences!
Hang in there girls,he's a comin,just wish he'd hurry up! | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 4:45:04 PM | 59 views with 4 posts as i write this and i think i'm the first bloke here.
it goes both ways as i understand it.
we sometimes say uplifting positive things in one thread only to go to another to release some of our frustrations. theres some great advice in other threads and some of it has been posted by people we all know quite well.
why do "some" men assume it's easier for women? | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 4:46:37 PM | No argument from me - it is near impossible!
I got told I had a lovely voice and that is what he liked - WTF! Give me a break - how pathetic and ignorant was that???
Then I get you are so pretty and make me so horny by message 2 - uhuh and your point is? Was it meant to impress me or turn me on - I am not sure.
One minute the intensity is more than you can handle and next minute there is stony cold silence. What gives guys?
I think "bob" and I are going to be happy for a very long time because at this rate the male species will genetically evolutionise themselves out of the human race.  | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 4:48:10 PM | ya have also left out that if they hear you are a single mother especially if you have a child/ren out of wedlock.... that you are a easy lay....and that you will jump into bed with just about anyone....
i actually had a conversation with this one guy.. who also was a parent... only had his kids for 2 nights on the weekends every weekend... and he abused me coz i couldnt drop everything during the week to go out with him.... so i reversed the role and said well im free on the weekend... we can go out then... and then he said no i cant i have kids...lol.. but he still didnt understand a female with fulltime care of their kid/s doesnt get to have alot of time to themselves and cant always get a babysitter when it suits the male..... he turned around and told me i was going to stay a lonely old woman for the rest of my life...lol... | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 5:15:47 PM | No I don't make that assumption, and it does go both ways.
Do women assume every post/message complimenting on a post is an attemp to 'crack onto them' ?
btw I don't want to discuss "titties" or pu$sy, had enough of that in Anatomy & Physiology assignments.
I'd be delighted in having some one "blow my mind" and if I can "blow their mind"; but with intelligent, meaning, and honest conversation. | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 7:52:55 PM | Ladies ladies, think that we all need to go back and read Vandy's post, highlighting the "some" men.
Yes it is true, the internet dating scene has a percentage of males only looking for one thing, but think you need to convert that to read the internet dating scene has a percentage of PEOPLE only looking for one thing. For every bad story you have dating and men am sure I have one in return about dating and women. Am sure that this wasn't meant to start off as a let's bag men thread but get the feeling it will end up that way.
To answer the question, I don't think this internet dating scene is any easier on either males or females, it is not easier than trying to meet people using any other method, a little more convienent maybe but not easier.
As for the tips, thanks advice is always good but need more, use those and still no fish!!!!  | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 8:19:22 PM | My post was not intended to bag men vandy & beach. Some of the men I talk to on here are wonderful guys who aren't out for one thing. But for every one of the "good guys", there are 4 who I think don't even bother to read my profile. If they did they would know that I don't want to be asked how big my breasts are or what my favourite sexual position is.
I acknowledge that there are some women out there who are here for the same thing but many of us are here for real reasons and genuinely want to meet someone.
I think this thread is to let us blow off a bit of steam but unfortunately it will probably only be read by the guys who don't need to read it.
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 9:12:39 PM | | Isn't someone going to come back with a "using the wrong bait beachy" comment .... I mean I left the door sooooo wide open for you all!!!! | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 9:25:10 PM | I first read this thread last night and thought just someone letting off steam"venting". I wasn't going to comment,we all need to blow it off at times.I never thought of it as dating advice,i feel at my age i should know how to go about that.I do get it wrong sometimes so maybe a kick in the pants is a good thing.So girls let it out,say what the f@ck,sh1t and hell,no more ms nice girl. | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 9:47:32 PM | I think its equally hard for all of us to be honest.You have to know what you want to start with, which i find really difficult!!
Some days i want friends,other days i think i do want something serious and still other days i just want to get laid.Do them all,do none of them,do whatever the hell you want but just have fun doing it.See the funny side and make the most of all the experiences along the way. | |
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ebgdae
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Joined: 12/27/2006
Msg: 17 | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 9:58:52 PM | I don't think it would be any easier for women on here personally. Especially if your looking for Long Term. How small a percentage of the opposite sex on here actually appeal to you on every level? Then how many of these people are you likely to actually have a date with?...the odds are pretty slim. Then once you screen them, because they're late or say inappropriate, impolite things. You probably realise why they are here...haha . I find it hard to find room for compromise, if I'm put in a compromising situation. So I'll opt for plan B, like most. Take the side exit.
This site isn't easy for anyone looking for long term. Especially with over inflated or vague profiles that are instantly revealed on meeting and make us weary and skeptical of perhaps more genuine ones. We are essentially looking for a soul mate. The internet provides us with many things on request, but a life partner? Might be a bit much to ask. | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/2/2007 11:11:35 PM | As a young man, I would cringe at a lot of things that were said to, in front of & about women. The head out of the car window, "corr, show us ya tits luv" & "wouldn't she be a good root". The boys room talk... she's a dog, slut , sack of potatoes, etc.
The assertive guys with the dirty mouth & the "treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen" attitude were the one's that were the most popular with women. Not just talking big boobed bimbo's here either, Dux of the school & Uni graduates too. Married at 22 had two or three kids divorced by 30, just about sums up everyone from my year at school.
As we get older I think we become more discerning & know more about what we want from a potential partner & have less patience with those that don't fit the mold.
I don't think that a lot of the wolf whistling, alpha males, make the the transition to internet dating very well. The wolf whistles turn into, wanna cam? And their cheeky smiles & cute bums are obsolete. | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/3/2007 12:16:04 AM | | I think sometimes we assume to much goes for both ladies and gents nothing is ever easy and here is no exception although i would rather "woo said strumpet" the old fashioned way at the local or out somewhere else.......Avocado has a point maybe some havent made the transition well at all and CC has shown us that very thing | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/3/2007 1:21:41 AM | | This is not a man-bashing thread, its simply some frustrated people talking about their bad experiences. Last I heard there was no law against that. | |
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| Why do men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/3/2007 1:30:52 AM | This maybe off the subject or to the side anyway, but one thing I have noticed when talking to women from the internet is they say there are no "good" guys out there and in general can't string two words together or they are rude and obnoxious etc etc....As if there is 1% of males who are sane and the rest are yobbos.
In my opinion, only one percent of the male internet population is on the plenty of fish forums or the women have got the numbers wrong.
I never talk to guys on the internet other than work related etc....So I wasn't exposed to how other guys interact or have discussions, or chat etc.
But to be honest, I have found the majority of posts from males on this forum are well thought out, punctuated, and easy to read. Slurs towards females are rare, and in fact I think a lot of these guys seem to be just what some of the women are looking for, they are right infront of them and yet they are all still here.....And all the while you still hear that males are this and that....
Now I could be wrong...Apparently I have been before.....Well OK, I definately have been....But I'd like to say I'm impressed with the level of conversation and the ability to debate without letting it fall into a shite fight.....
Just an observation
Greig | |
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| Why do SOME men assume it's easier for women?
Posted: 7/3/2007 2:17:01 AM | Oh I feel the brunt of your frustrations guys.
Ok why do SOME men (MOST that I've spoken with, but yes only some of you) assume it's easier for women?
That better?
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