| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 12:36:53 PM | I did a search of the forums and have not found this thread yet, so here goes...
Is there one couple that you can think of that you believe has the kind of relationship you would like to have, and if so, what is it about their relationship that you find ideal?
In my case, my parents come to mind. While they had their occasional arguments, they respected each others differences, and always kept a united front when they faced difficulties. The most lasting impression for me was when my mother was dying of cancer. Not only did my father stand by her through years of battling the disease, he always made sure that she knew how much he loved her, and how beautiful he thought she was. Then, after mom died, he took care of my mother's mother until she died. To this day, I look for a man who will stand by me like that. 
OK, now it's your turn... | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 12:50:57 PM | My grandparents
Their love remended me of that movie *the notebook*
and that's the kind of love i would love too have | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 12:53:16 PM | if i were to take my parents actions as any sort of model for where i should be at this point, i think i'd be on the verge of suicide. i only know one married couple, including all my friends parents. i know a few people who are getting married, and they'll probably be divorced soon enough, and i know a bunch of divorced people... if that counts for anything. i don't think that relationships are meant to last.
but you want to know if i know a couple in a relationship that i would want to be in.... not really, no. every relationship i know of is extremely dysfunctional. even worse, some of my friends are dating chicks i already dated and broke up with lol | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 12:55:48 PM | | My parents and some other married couples. You just see in their eyes when they're together. After being married for many decades, there's still the spark. The kindness, gentleness, the displays of affection. They still act like they're dating, which is fabulous that they haven't lost that excitement over being with their special one. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 1:16:10 PM | | I would have to say my older sister and my brother in law. They have four kids, and two of them plus my brother in law have a genetic heart condition called Long QT Syndrome. The diagnosis first came when my nephew at age 9 suffered a heart attack. I watched as my sister and her husband united to face the challenges that went with the illnesses. When I am feeling down about my life, I go up to Red Deer to visit them, and each time am amazed with the love that is in the house. They provide a united front for the kids, for each other, and when they need to make a trip down to Calgary to see the pediatric cardiologist at the Children’s Hospital, or the kids need to have adjustments on their pace makers, they go together. They are best friends, lovers, companions and each other’s support, and an inspiration to me. I do not let a week go by where I do not tell my nephew and nieces, or my sister and brother in law how much I consider them all to be role models. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 1:47:59 PM | My parents definitly. After 32 years of marriage they are more in love than ever. Plus I saw them work through some hard stuff that would have broken up many marriages, but they put a lot of effort into staying together and their relationship is stronger for it.
My aunt and uncle are good role models too. At their 25th wedding anniversary last weekend my uncle made a speech saying how even though their life together was usually tough, he wouldn't have changed a thing and couldn't think of a better woman to go through the tough stuff with than my aunt and that he couldn't have done it without her. He also talked about how no matter what, whenever he left the house, whether it was just to go to work for the day or if he was leaving on an extended hunting trip he would always give her a kiss and tell her he loved her, didn't matter if they had been fighting or if she was sleeping, he still always did it. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 2:01:29 PM | Nope. I believe that each relationship is unique for the two people who are relating; or rather it should be, at best. The idea of having an "ideal relationship" in mind and trying to slot someone into that predefined partner role seems to devalue their uniqueness, and your own. My parents have a great relationship, but it wouldn't suit me, because I am different from them. My relationships have never really mirrored anyone else's; though of course there is commonality of some features and logical patterns. I have always chosen to focus on the other person and let the relationship be defined by the way we related to each other, rather than trying to make it into anything (although I could not have identified that this was what I was doing at the time, I just didn't consider any other possibility).
It's heart-warming to see people who are happy in their relationships, but I'd not want to be anyone other than myself and I'd not be able to be in a relationship that wasn't the unique creation of me and the person I was relating to. Until I found someone who harmonised with me I thought it'd be impossible to be myself and be in a relationship because of this very belief. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 2:15:56 PM | Yes there is! The relationship i'm in right now. My special someone and myself relate to each other harmoniously. I've never been with anyone else or seen anyone with the relationship we share at all. I've not read any books that would suggest that our way of relating would be the way for a successful relationship yet it has happened for us. We never need to compromise, negotiate, or sacrifice anything. Our simple way of being fits perfectly into the others world.
I'd not want anyone else's way of relating, and i've read many books on the subject and even the ones that seem to be successful by design seem to lack the depth we share. Of course nothing is perfect and we are still growing and changing but i'd not want to grow and change with anyone else.
crazylilting | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 2:45:47 PM | I don't know any modern day people I would say I want to model my relationship after.... I have a good one the way it is... and it comes naturally. That is because I picked someone who I not only was compatible with but was emotionally mature. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine a guy around my age would be emotionally mature because I never met many. The only ones I did meet were either happily married and had been for decades.... or old widowers. Never someone my age.
What a pleasure it is to have a responsible, loving partner !!!. and he is a handsome doctor to boot !!!... my age and..... !!!
I met him online which only adds the "miracle" dimension to the mix.
Other than that ( modern day) I guess my grandparents were solid and they were married well over 50 years... a happy marriage. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 2:49:10 PM | My best friend and her husband. They are very happy indeed.
A few relationships of past friends.
I learn from them and remember them for the next relationship. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 3:19:30 PM | How about the relationship of Mickey and Mallory from Natural Born Killers. They were truly in love.
But all kidding aside, for me it would have to be my nanny and my pappy.
They got married young and were married for over 50 years before my nanny passed away. My pappy passed away about a year after that, he just gave up after she passed away.
What makes them unique to me, after being married for over 50 years they still looked at each other with love in their eyes. They were still in love. They would argue and have fights like any couple but they always talked and worked it out and never gave up on each other. They were what real love is all about.
I have this great photo of my nanny and pappy taken not that long before she died. She is looking at the camera and he is looking at her, I cannot describe that look of love. But I want the king of love where someone looks at me the way that my pappy looked at my nanny.
~Carrie | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 3:47:52 PM | My parents. They met and 6 months later were married. 3 children and 35 + years later they still love each other...they are true partners...supporting each other in their dreams.
My bestfriend....she is married to a great guy dispite her worries about relationships and marriages lasting after her mother had an affair..and emotional abuse growing up.
Also my patients...I work in cancer care and when a 75 yo gentleman or lady comes in for treatment with their spouse the love is very very evident even at the worst times after 50 + years together.
So these are the reasons I'm still hopeful and I still believe that marriage is a great thing. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 6:12:19 PM | Adolf and Eva Hitler. Although i think they were only married for a day. But they sure were role models.  | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 7:55:58 PM | Wow....ya' know...I never really thought about this, because I never really had any! As someone else said, if I had my parents as relationship role models, I would either have committed suicide by now, or been married and divorced numerous times.
Oddly, my dad and his wife....only because it was not easy for them...they started off actually in a negative manner. (She was my dads mistress...when he and my mom were married) They basically fooled around with one another through his 2 marriages and her 4...then married one another and have been together for 20+ years now. Part of me resents their journey....another part of me says WOW...they made it work after hurting so many others. It is a weird sort of mixed feeling...but now...they are the happiest couple I know of, and I guess it just tells me that not giving up, being persevering, etc...and that love outlasts a lot of things. Sad, hunh?? | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 8:12:33 PM | | My parents. And my maternal grandparents, but only because I don't know anything about the other side. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 8:25:49 PM | Definitely my parents - married 55 years and they still flirt with each other. Kinda eww and cute at the same time. My sister, married for 24 years, never been any major dramas with them, just got back from a trip around the world together and no divorce so Id say they were a good couple..
I have seen couples and I also think the best ones are the ones that laugh together, dont put each other down in either public or private. Sort things out. You are going to have to disagree at some point in you want a lifetime with someone, its how you deal with those times that make it a good relationship. As soon as I see/hear a couple out in public, married or otherwise, where they are taking cheap shots at each or putting each other down, I know they are in relationship suicide.
There are definitely good ones out there though. | |
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UR4ME?
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Joined: 11/15/2006
Msg: 21 | |
| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/7/2007 10:30:43 PM | Al & Peg Bundy - Married With Children
No matter how bad their life got, no matter how horrible their kids were, no matter how dire their finances became, at the end of the day they stayed together for love. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/8/2007 1:46:56 AM | The odd older couple you see walking accross the street.....Ever watch older people walk? Sometimes you will see an older couple and if you watch their feet they are so insync with each other...I heard once that when people are in love they just are, same step, same time...its very cute and uplifting to see...maybe I am a romantic, but I would hope that it means they are very in love...so maybe someday we will all have someone we are insync with.....
as for an actual couple/s, I would say my gr grand parents and Johny Cash and June Carter....both couples, so in love and passed away within months of each other..... | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/8/2007 2:42:38 AM | Those of you who stated TV shows.... Im not sure wether to laugh at or slap you.
Im going with my parents as well. For 33 years they have been through more things than I will mention, and they love each other. Not in that sickening, retarded way. They have their fights, but when the sun goes down, they are together, as a whole. They help each other out in so many aspects of life... I look at them and I wonder if I will ever find that kind of love. Its not peaches and white stuff... its real. I love that. Its simple.... and its real. | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/8/2007 3:22:40 AM | | I am happy to say that I have broken away from my family tree of alcoholics! The men I attracted were GONE the minute any medical problems surfaced. Now that I am healthy I attract quality men in real life. (Online is another story ~LOL~!) | |
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| Relationship Role Models
Posted: 7/8/2007 5:25:51 AM | yes my grandparents who were married for 55 years.
and how about Tim McGraw and Faith Hill | |
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