| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 8:33:21 PM | | I have a friend who has been dating this guy for a year now on and off...he has cheated on her several times in the past, pulled her hair, kicked her out of the apartment (she lives with him) and just kept lying to her about talking to and seeing his ex. Well, about a month ago, my friend was telling me how he never says i love you anymore to her, never acts excited to see her, and is only affectionate when he wants sex. Then she never said another word about it to me. Recently, she found out her grandfather only has a few months left, and she makes it seem like now, everything is good between her and this guy..even though their so recent history of him breaking up with her and kicking her out...I find it hard to believe a guy could change his attitude that fast. What do you guys think? | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 8:36:47 PM | | Tragedy can make a person change for the immediate good of the situation. but, in my opinion the guy is likely to continue his abusive ways once the crisis is over. | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 8:37:44 PM | I think she's vulnerable right now and taking advantage of her grandfather's death to get as much affection out of her boyfriend as is possible . . . and then things will get back to normal and he won't feel obligated anymore . . again.
I must add: I am extremely annoyed by exes who use deaths in the family as an excuse to call me. If you miss me, need me, want to talk to me, need affection or a warm heart . . . don't friggin' use someone's death as an excuse to reach out. That is so low. | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 9:58:57 PM | | Dump his ass! He cheated on her. What else does she need to know? | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 10:11:21 PM | they're both sick
remember that old saying? takes' two? well, it does.....evidentally you are trying to make it three...or even four..stay out of it (unless you are already or want to be sick also) | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 10:11:33 PM |
he has cheated on her several times in the past, pulled her hair, kicked her out of the apartment (she lives with him) and just kept lying to her about talking to and seeing his ex.
I would like to think that after the first time that he cheated or displayed violence against her she would be out of there.
Well, about a month ago, my friend was telling me how he never says i love you anymore to her, never acts excited to see her, and is only affectionate when he wants sex. Then she never said another word about it to me.
This would mean that he is out cheating on her again or that he is not wanting to be in the relationship. Thankfully he is not hitting her again.
Recently, she found out her grandfather only has a few months left, and she makes it seem like now, everything is good between her and this guy..even though their so recent history of him breaking up with her and kicking her out...I find it hard to believe a guy could change his attitude that fast. What do you guys think?
I think that he feels bad for her right now with her grandpappy being ill and all. I hope that this opens his eyes and makes him change his ways. But in reality, after this passes he will probably go back to his old ways.
She has some choices, try therapy with him, stay with someone who cheats and displays acts of violence, or leave him and seek a healthy relationship.
I do hope that for her sake, he has changed and this opened his eyes.
~Carrie | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 10:18:32 PM | | The best way to predict the future is to look at the past. | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 10:21:14 PM | It's seems like she's got more troubles on her mind than a relationship thats falling apart. She probably hasn't said anything because shes more focused on other things. Have you asked her how things are going with him? Who knows, maybe he's being supportive to her due to her grandfather.... therefore, she thinks he's being a good man.
In my experience, a leopard can't change his spots... As much as you want to believe they wouldn't cheat or break your heart again, you're a fool for trusting them again.... What is broken is broken -- and I'd rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.
Dee | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/1/2007 10:31:23 PM | | I honestly don't think people can change that fast, and my little sister is in a similar situation. Last summer her fiance called her up one day to tell her he cheated on her and got someone pregnant and that he wanted to sleep with someone else so he was dumping her. Then like a week later he called her up saying how sorry he was and how he changed and wouldn't do stuff like that and realized how great things were after this other chick (not the preggers one, the other one) said she didn't want to sleep with him. So what did she do? Took him back because he said after a week he had changed. So they got married and a few weeks ago he kicked her out and said all she could take was her clothes and her makeup and her laptop. He said he was keeping all of the shower gifts she got at the bridal shower I had for her the week before because she never paid rent (their agreement was he paid rent, she paid utilities and bought all the groceries). She tried to kill herself and ended up in the hospital for a week. During that week she asked our dad to call a divorce lawyer. Three days later, after he went to ONE councelling session he said he had changed and begged for her back, so they never went to a divorce lawyer. And 2 weeks later they were fighting about the exact same thing. It's gotten to the point where no one in our family wants to have anything to do with her because she only calls us to complain and was in town for a week (they live two hours away) staying at his parents place who live a whole 10-15 minutes from us and she never once came over. My mom told her the other day that if she didn't show up at my grandma's 90th b-day party that she's no longer her daughter and to never call again. | |
|
| Change so quick?
Posted: 8/5/2007 6:10:26 AM | | Uhhhh...forgive my jaded input, but is Grandpa wealthy? | |
|
Home
login 
