| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 9:04:21 AM | I used to have a catchy little profile blurb - friendly, conversational, even a bit confrontational in a sassy sort of way. Nothing remotely sexual in the blurb - in fact, it was actually a long list of what I sought in a potential relationship partner, and then ended with "I dont hold out a lot of hope of finding this here, but...." I have flirty pictures. I got quite a few responses every day, but almost every single one was either "you are looking for Mr. Perfect, you *insert nasty word here*, or "hey sexy, nice rack - wanna hook up?". So I thought perhaps I'd best gauge the "friendly" back, leave out the "list" and be very open and non-confronting about what I was seeking. I put my many varied "what I like to do for fun" on the profile, and this is my little blurb:
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About Me: I'm here to come in contact with LOCAL gentlemen that would be amenable to meeting in person to see if there is attraction - then proceeding in a normal fashion from there for dating, doing things together, etc. I am not looking for a chat or email buddy. I work from home and am very new here to Spokane, so do not have a great many outlets by which I can meet people. I look forward to hearing from intelligent, sincere, likeminded with similar interests - gentlemen who seek the same.
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I have not had ONE SINGLE EMAIL in the entire two weeks this blurb has been on my profile. SAME flirty pictures.....SAME amount of views.....not one single email.
I do realize the obvious answer to my not stated yet question is "because you make it very clear that you are not looking for "just sex". But I hear that there are many men on POF that are looking for more than "just sex".....so question - is there something boring/wrong/offensive about the blurb? What do men like to see the most on women's profile blurbs? What makes them the most comfortable? Or do men really just look at pictures?
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 9:14:17 AM | Bethlet, I think your original profile sounded fine but in my opinion the pics draw out the crazies. Are you flirty 24x7 or do you sometimes wear your hair down and be "real?"
By keeping the pics you have and changing your profile to not reflect your personality, as a reader I am not sure how to take it as it seems a bit contradictory to me.
JMO, take it or leave it. | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:06:13 AM | This is just a guy's opinion, take it for what it is worth.
I don't see anything wrong with the profile as it is. I do think the little poem about not making a woman cry is annoying. Sheesh. We men get it. We know you are our equals and you have feelings, no need to be reminded of it at every turn. Just because it is in the form of a cutesy poem doesn't mean some men won't read into it that you are going to be a hassle to deal with.
The pics are mild in my opinion and say, " I will be a minx for the right man".
Are there guys online looking for a quick roll in the hay? Yup. You found those already, and the ones who wrote you earlier expressing that you were being way too picky (which you have every right to be) have already looked at your profile and when they see your picture in the searches don't bother to reexamine it.
What do I like to see in a profile? Pictures of various kinds. Something that tells me what your body looks like without showing off your barely covered boobs and ass. A picture of a woman smiling is always good. A picture of her actually engaged in an activity she enjoys is good. A series of strictly head shots or pics of women in a large group are a turn off. We aren't psychic, we don't know which one is you unless you tell us. I don't care what a close up of your eye looks like or the side of your face and that's it, that tells me you are hiding something. I really could care less to see your cat or dog. Horse pictures are OK if you are actually someone whose life has horses in it. Scenery? Unless you are in it, Gag. Paintings or airbrushwork of a sexy, hot chick that isn't you but how you perceive your inner child to be when it grows up, GAG.
Do men only look at the pictures? Initially yes. We are "hunting" so to speak. Men are more visual creatures and women are more verbal. Goes back to the caveman days. It takes a great deal of visual acuity to pick out game that has adapted to its environment, it takes a great deal of silence to hunt game efficiently. It does however take a great deal of communication to organize a small group into a gathering party, to pick berries, gather nuts etc. So, yes, we men look at the pictures. When we men finally do read your profile, depending on what we are looking for we pick up on certain words, I do anyway. A woman who starts making unrealistic "fantasy" demands about what she expects me to be like in her profile, before she ever meets me, doesn't get a response from me. Hell, you want this and you want that, and we haven't even met yet? Nope, sorry.
What I do like to read in a profile is what you will bring to a relationship. What you like and dislike. The facts ma'am, the facts. I'm hunting remember. Which way was the herd moving, what direction is the wind blowing, what is the terrain like in the direction of the herd's movement. When I read a profile I am looking for those subtle little signs that tell me what you are really going to be like. If I am a man who is hunting for a long term relationship I look for that sign. If I am a man who is hunting a quick roll in the hay, I look for those signs. If a woman's profile is full of long walks on the beach and romantic unrealistic BS, well, what average guy wants to try and live up to that crap a gal got out of a romance novel?
If on the other hand a woman says, look, this is me, I can or can't cook a decent meal, I am not a gold digger, I will treat you with respect, you will get good sex on a regular basis, I take care of myself mentally, emotionally and spiritually, here are my hobbies and outside interests, I am not a man hater, etc. etc. OK, gotcha. Those are easy to read sign for the hunt. Funny romantic poems and such don't resonate with men too much. They are great if you are looking for a man with the heart and soul of a woman however.
To be honest, if I were a man your age, having had all my children and looking for companionship and sex and a relationship that wasn't going to be a hassle, I would contact you with the profile you have up now. I would be a little hesitant though.
All that is my opinion, and I am sure men will disagree. But by and large I think I have it about right. | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:09:42 AM | Damn one outta two is not that bad
I gotta agree with the boobs comment men are just pervs like that!
But Bethlet your pics are great you are a very attractive woman...I think also that those of us over 35 are SOL as YOU menpeople don't appreciate grown women  | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:16:04 AM | I can only speak for me, what attracts me to a profile is that she is confident, independent, intelligent, not jaded or pissed, knows what she wants without the LONG laundry list of requirements, and nice picture(s) that portray her in the same light that she says she is in her profile.
I don't see anything wrong per-say with the blurb, again.. just me.. but it really doesn't scream to me "contact me". | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:34:07 AM | Hey, Missy:
From your profile, which has NO pic on it...:
Not looking to meet or date...here to write in forums and chat with friends..
***IF YOU HAVE NO PIC I PROBABLY WON'T ANSWER YOU***
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:34:21 AM | A great smile, intelligence, wit, not angry or.........or.......always posting about men & boobs and painting all men with the same brush as far as not liking mature women.....ahem...cough...indigo...cough cough, lol.
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:34:59 AM | Bethlet , It would depend on the guy looking at the profile? yes.
First thing I just looked at your profile and first thing on my mind is " this woman is pretty but a little loopy with the pig tails"
My buddy looked at your profile and thought It was cute, two guys similar tastes but different opinions
Do up a profile that attracts the kind of man you want to attract!!!
remember this no matter what profile you post you will always attract some whack jobs, all women online receives from time to time emails from guys that are weirdo's ,whack job and some just plain a piece of chicken short a snack pack. | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:37:16 AM | Bethlet, I've read enough of your forum posts to think that your current profile doesn't paint an accurate picture of you. Not that it's dishonest--but it's pretty generic and doesn't give much hint of the intelligent, sometimes sassy woman I've seen posting. And I think Lookingbill has it right about the poem and song lyrics: They don't further your cause and may detract from it.
If what you're doing isn't bringing the desired results, time to try something else.
--Ms. Flis | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:40:41 AM | MsFlis:
Gawd, I'm DOOMED if any men actually follow the trail from my profile to my posts! HAHAHHAHAHA
Ok, check it out now. I've given it the "Bill Rewrite". And added a touch of Beth.
We'll leave it for awhile and see what we get. *evil grin*
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:45:22 AM | So, the question is "what changed" and - I presume ultimately - how to generate email contacts?
I'm of the opinion a profile should tell me something about YOU, so I can decide if we sound like a good fit. If a profile is a laundry list of "this is what I want", it sounds to me like the person is focused on what they want (read: selfish), and hasn't told me anything about what they offer or who they are.
The current profile comes across as personalityless and unfriendly. It's a bit long too (for what it says) without telling us anything about you.
I look forward to hearing from intelligent, sincere, likeminded with similar interests - gentlemen who seek the same.
Duh! Who isn't? What are your interests. Why'd you move to this new town? Where are you from? What's your favorite thing to do on a weekend / on your time off? What are your hobbies?
I'd change it to read something more like:
I just moved here to Spokane from [insert city / state here]. I work from home, [insert hobbies / interestes here].
The best way to get to know someone is to meet them in person. Please be local, [insert other qualifications here]. | |
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Deni30
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Joined: 5/29/2007
Msg: 21 | |
| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:51:08 AM | | I think you are a beautiful lady! I'm being brutally honest here- the pigtails are done in such a way that make you look like a nutjob. I think men like a straightforward easy to read profile that is basic yet informative. The who, what, where, when and why might be a good approach, and maybe limit the silly sexiness to just one pic. :) | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:56:07 AM | I noticed that you're looking for a younger man, do you suppose that's a factor?
I wondered if guys read the profiles at all, but the most interesting guys I've connected with have read my profile (here or elsewhere) and have pointed out something in it that they found attractive or interesting. | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 10:56:59 AM | Short and sweet and a little sassy! Wonder if that promise of good sex will take you back to the inappropriate responses, though. Do report back on the results...
As for being doomed if anyone follows your forum-post trail--well, my philosophy is that anyone who'd be turned off by anything I've said in the forums is most definitely not the one for me.
--Ms. Flis | |
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| What attracts men the most on women's profiles?
Posted: 8/4/2007 11:02:16 AM |
Bethlet, I've read enough of your forum posts to think that your current profile doesn't paint an accurate picture of you. Not that it's dishonest--but it's pretty generic and doesn't give much hint of the intelligent, sometimes sassy woman I've seen posting.
Bethlet, the glasses pic was the one that worked. All of those are hot but.. the glasses.. | |
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.....could be yer just weeding out tha guys that only wanna good time
