| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 8:21:41 PM | Ok, here's my question... I'm currently on 67 members favorites lists. Each of these I have contact with, maybe not every day or week but quite frequently. And every new favorite that is added gets a personal response (yes I know.. I'm drowning in emails.. LOL )
To you guys: would me being on this many favorites lists prevent you from contacting me? Would you choose NOT to contact me because of this? Would you look down on a woman for having "too many favorites"? And WHY would this be an issue?
any info you can give is welcome! Thank you everyone who responds!!
J | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 8:25:16 PM | would it prevent me from contacting you? Possibly I have no desire to have contact be a matter of standing out in and amongst the 18million guys on the favorites list as odds are you would'nt even look at any email I sent you, you simply would'nt have the time. Would it matter to me or would I judge you on it?Hell no more power to you if you can get that many people interested in you more power to you. So if hypothetically you contacted me it would'nt have any bearing on anything.
JC | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 8:30:38 PM | | That's interesting. I'm on a bunch of guy's favorites lists but a lot of them have never contacted me. I would hope that being on someone's favorites list wouldn't keep someone from contacting me. It's not MY fault I'm on their list, lol. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 8:42:17 PM | | I wouldn't look down on woman that has a lot of favorites but I would feel I would be wasting my time trying to contact someone who probably is overwhelmed with e-mails already. I use to add women to my favorites lists but from what I have been reading in the forums some of them take offense to this so I don't unless someone adds me first. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 8:46:10 PM | | I am very picky on who has me as a favorite if I dont have constant contact with them of some kind .. I remove myself , Now ive had one guy ask if he can put me as a favorrite cause he likes things i say in the forums . But for the most part I keep it small , and if they add me and dont talk I remove myself . | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 9:45:23 PM | | I new to POF and and until you become familar with the local fish and my area it seems like a very large school so I have used the favorites as a live well or holding tank till I can sort them out. I guess I could Bookmark them to a folder. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 10:22:56 PM | | OP you are amazing if you can keep up with that many people. Not a guy but I'm going to comment anyway. I'm on a lot of favorites lists also but only have contact with a few...why people put you on their lists and never contact? go figure.. but I have to admit I'm guilty of it also.. have some on mine that I haven't contacted for various reasons. People have to understand that sometimes you add someone that you think might be interesting to get to know, or because of something they said in a forum, their pictures...lots of reasons. Numbers of favorites a person is listed on shouldn't stop someone from contacting you if they are interested. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 11:24:41 PM | | It's not a turn off, but like you said you are "drowning in email". So I would probably still send you an email, but I probably wouldn't expect a whole lot out of it. I know a lot of people have favorites that they have never contacted, but when you see people with 150+ favorites, you have to think they are talking to a lot of people. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/5/2007 11:50:11 PM | For me it really doesn't bug me in the least. So you have a bunch of friends no worries on my end.
But for others it might due to the fact that they might thing that there is just way to much competition to get to know this person..hell she has 67 people who are trying to get her as well. Thats not to say everyone thinks this way its just what it seems. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 12:06:31 AM | There's that. Yeah, no way would I email.
Then there's calling yourself a sex kitten and showin off the twins alot... | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 1:03:32 AM | I would contact you but I wouldn't expect anything back because I'd assume that out of those 67 guys, you'd rather have at least one of them than me.
I mean, I don't lack self esteem really, but I wouldn't assume that you'd just pick me over those other 67 people. It'd just be a little intimidating, I'm sure some guys would just skip over you. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 2:12:21 AM | well If having too many favourites on your profile is a turn off...well then a guy could be missing out on someone lovely...like moi !! he he he 
What I am saying is...don't judge on those that have a heap of faves...thinking they wouldn't contact you...if they liked what they read about you...I for one try to contact every email I get...even if it is a *hello and thanks for your compliment* or whatever...sometimes I don't...but 99% of the time I do...
Anyway...you don't know until you try...right ??!!...so if they don't reply...then they don't reply and move on to the next 
Oh and OP...It doesn't stop me from receiving emails...And If they really like what they read...they would wanna contact you no matter what...so I wouldn't worry... | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 2:32:39 AM | | If a woman was on too many favourites, I would think she has tons of attention already. That means the competition is pretty intense. I might look at someone who doesn't have so many people on her favourites and fits me. So I would say I might look at that. I might think it would reduce chances for me getting a response. That is very nice of you to be responding to so many people. It seems very considerate, but it might be overwhelming. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 6:29:18 AM | The favorite list is (to me) like signing someone's yearbook in high school. It's a gesture of respect, or interest (in what they post, typically), or that they are a friend.
Especially in the case of women, as I've heard from some, many favorites aren't even contacting them. A woman typically just has to only put a revealing photo up to suddenly appear on hundreds of "favorites" list.
(That's not the only way, to not put down the ones who "earn it", btw)
So, as such, it means little to me in turning me on or off.  | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 9:20:34 AM | | This is interesting. I can tell you that I am not in contact with most of the people who have added me to their favorites. I could go through and delete myself from all of their lists, but I have only done that if a person bothered me or offended me in some manner. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 12:26:43 PM | Nope doesn't matter to me. I put a bunch of women into my favorites, I saw them and liked them. Not all are ones I'd date, some are too far away or something else is a stopper for dating but I liked something about them. Some I just email with alot and chat... I've met a couple cool women so far on here :)
If you see someone added you and you like them, odds are they liked you too, go ahead and email them.
You really never know how your going to meet a great guy, could be from seeing they added you to their favorites... say HI! lol | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 12:52:37 PM | | As a guy seeking your attentions, knowing that you're on a lot of people's favorites lists is not a turn off. Knowing that you're emailing all 67 of these guys is. | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 12:54:57 PM | | It leaves me to wonder, but I've been so wrong before, concerning so many things, what the hell do *I* know? | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 12:55:10 PM | If a woman was on too many favourites, I would think she has tons of attention already. That means the competition is pretty intense. I might look at someone who doesn't have so many people on her favourites and fits me. So I would say I might look at that. I might think it would reduce chances for me getting a response. That is very nice of you to be responding to so many people. It seems very considerate, but it might be overwhelming.
...That doesn't always hold true, a number of people that have me on their favourites haven't even contacted me.... Also I have made many friends both male and female since I joined and they have added me as a favourite as well. So you can't go by that...if your interested...contact them.
...maeflowers | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 2:32:28 PM |
To you guys: would me being on this many favorites lists prevent you from contacting me?
Yes, it gives the impression your have your hands full. Since you have 100% control over your friends list (as in removing people from it), then either you really wanna show how popular you are... or you don't care about it. Either way, most likely just pass ya by.
Personally, if a person doesn't get in touch in several days, I nuke them! | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 3:00:03 PM | Thanks all for the replies!!! I wanted to respond to the posts!
Tsorath : I may get alot of emails, however I reply to EVERYONE I get a message from, regardless of who they are or where they come from. To me it is disrespectful to NOT aknowledge someone who has taken the time to write to you.
SingleMomE: You're right in saying that it should not be held against you if someone has decided to contact you... even MANY someones.
Romeo29: Even if they have a lot of people on their list doesn't mean that they won't make time to chat with someone new (this is MY oppinion only)
Christi66: I usually will sent them a hi email saying I've noticed them and asking if they want to chat... if I get no reply well they get deleted.
DoUcanoe: Well as long as you contact them and don't just sit on their list forever without saying a word!! LOL
mitebme4: I really do keep in contact with everyone on my list. Some (most) are just friends that I want to keep in touch with, others are guys I am interested in, others still are some of my girlfriends who are on the site and we pass advice and possible matches on to each other.
RockGnome: I'm glad you think that #'s don't mean anything!
jbparrot: You'd be surprised by the response you'd get. To get an email back from me you'd never know that I get as many emails as I do. Like I said.. some of the people I only have semi occasional contact with and others I have daily contact with (the ones I'm quite interested in). But I respect EVERYONE and reply to every email I'm sent!
Biganime: There may be competition for the lady in question... however if she could be the right one.. why not give it a try??
Puscifer: Dude.. get a sense of humor! The sex kitten thing is just a joke.. oh yeah and the twins..... they're there.... whether or not I wear a turtleneck or a vee neck.... DEAL
Rapidfire: What if you were to be the lucky guy out of the 67?? I'm still single on here aren't I???? Haven't found him yet...
Keepitreal: Thanks for your post honey... you seem sweet and nice and have much the same attitude as I do. And you're right... those that really want to get to know me will MAKE the effort!
Seavoyage: You know how I am.. I simply can't not reply to someone if they've made the effort to contact me.. it's simply not in me to do so! as I said before There may be competition for the lady in question... however if she could be the right one.. why not give it a try??
Montreal Guy: Thanks for your post. You are right that there are MANY reasons that someone has been added to a favorites list.. however, I am finding that there seems to be some kind of .. "stigma" attached to having alot of favorites.
Seabreeze 0702: May I inquire as to why you keep them on your list if they do not contact you or vice versa?
Tim0066: Thanks darlin! You have the same attitude that I find alot of guys on here do and I'm happy to chat with lots of people... even only just as friends.
Greaywolf: LOL. Most guys never complain about being on a lady's favorites list!
Novel Approach: I'm sorry that you feel that way... As I have previously stated not all are persons I'm interested in... some are simply friends.
Schadenfreudian: Makes you wonder about what?
maeflowers: Thanks for your post! I am in exactly the same boat as you are but I think guys look and see 67 favorites and make incorrect assumptions...
Scorpio-dude: As previously stated: Some of the people I only have semi occasional contact with and others I have daily contact with (the ones I'm quite interested in). But I respect EVERYONE and reply to every email I'm sent! Even if they have a lot of people on their list doesn't mean that they won't make time to chat with someone new | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 3:02:04 PM |
Being on lots of favorites lists wouldn’t really bother me, as long as I still got some attention.
exactly greaywolf..... a few people have a large list as they have been here a while and are popular on the forums.... never let that put you off.... most of my favs I have not spoken to for ages or do not even know | |
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| Are too many favorites a turn off?
Posted: 8/6/2007 3:07:46 PM | | Hokay. Let's get to scribblin' here. Having read some of these posts, I can see where some of the gents are a little intimidated. Keep in mind guys, it's just a number. She sure as hell isn't going to check your profile if you don't say anything. You're guaranteed to lose if you don't play. There was one post that really caught my eye. Why is it a turn off that Gwenivere responded to all of her favourites? You assume an awful lot. The fact is that it tells a lot about a person's character. Her profile clearly states that the majority those who contact her with something to say will likely get a response! That's more than I can say for most on this site, including myself. Ultimately, when it comes down to it, it's a number. A number of people that see something worth noticing in a person. If you're intimidated or turned off by that, well that's your loss.... | |
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