| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 9:47:07 AM | What does your alpha male look like, act like, what ladies do you want in a man. Here is your chance to let us know.
Let us know about the obvious stuff, but common gives some details on the little things too.
Stable Job, sense of humour, kindness, honesty......etc
Let us know
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 9:57:04 AM | Well, you asked - hopefully the answers don't cause female bashing. But I doubt it.
For me:
He's gotta be tall, athletic, between 25-45 (under 30 if he's mature and over 40 IF he looks younger), have dark hair, preferably long, great arms, a nice smile.
He's gotta be active/still interested in having fun, good in bed, modest but confident, well read, well spoken and like to write, laid back, honest, good natured, well balanced, have some sense of humor, love animals and either be within 30 minutes of my house or willing to travel a lot and a long distance.
Being employed is good, and he's gotta love what he does no matter what it is or how much he makes. He's got to be ok with social situations, confident enough to have other things going on besides me and secure enough to be ok with me needing my space and having other things going on besides him.
I think that about covers it. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 10:12:02 AM | Well for one thing he would have to not be an alpha male. I hate that kind of attitude.
More specifically, I just recently realized that I use the same three words to describe all the men I'm attracted to: competent, calm, kind. So that would be the first thing. The second thing is that his relationship goals have to be compatible with mine. And the third thing is that I have to be physically attracted to him, which can mean a number of things, but generally that he's well-kept and well-built. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 11:08:28 AM | -Be considerate of my needs and be willing to meet them.
-Be willing and able to be the leader. (did I just hear a gasp from femi-nazis everywhere?)
-Be a gentleman in every circumstance.
-Have distinct boundaries that he will not allow anyone to cross.
-Kind but strong.
-Responsible
-Good sense of humor.
-Strong grasp of what the Bible actually says. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 11:25:38 AM | uglybetty your going to wait a long time for that  | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 11:46:47 AM | i agree with scarter, typical women with high standards.. and yet still single!! Gee i wonder why too!!  | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 12:41:54 PM | uglybetty your going to wait a long time for that
That's ok, I am prepared to wait - or not ever find it. I actually don't have a problem with being single so it all works out.
i agree with scarter, typical women with high standards.. and yet still single!! Gee i wonder why too!!
I don't wonder why. It's totally by choice... | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 12:44:47 PM | Betty was totally calling my name...except for the dark hair. 
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 12:45:52 PM | | ^^^ And the location. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 12:47:16 PM | ....next time I'm buying some rock lobster.....
Oops, is that Maine?? It's been a long time since I've been to the Northeast. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 3:04:23 PM | There is nothing wrong with Betty's standards. Everyone has standards and preferences.
I'd rather be single AND happy, rather than with someone who is not my ideal and whom I settled for just for the sake of saying to everyone ''oh yeah i have a bf''.....I get told all the time, you'll never find what you're looking for, you demand too much.
But even though I think Im' a great catch, men have let me go because i didn't meet their standards for whatever reasons. So you can't put all the blame on my standards for why I"M single...it goes both ways | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 3:57:24 PM | These, for me, are characteristics of what I consider an Alpha Male to be. Also things I find appealing. Nothing is a deal breaker, but these are generally how I assess if someone is Alpha or not.
What he is:
taller than me (I'm 5'2", so that's pretty likely)
stronger than me
as smart or smarter than I am
as confident or more confident than I am
a dominant personality (as in "Alpha") but not a jerk
comfortable taking the lead, but understanding that I can too
aggressive in the bedroom - I might initiate, but unless he's tired or not in the mood (and that's okay) he's likely to take over
comfortable in his masculinity
stable employment, although what it is matters less than responsibility
a fighter - someone who won't let the world walk all over them, and if they're knocked down then they get back up
What he isn't:
a metrosexual (the scourge of manhood, IMO)
abusive, generally aggressive, or neurotically possessive
terribly insecure, always has to be the tough guy, a freak
always dresses in black, has a knife/sword collection, thinks he's a ninja
someone who gets into fights at the bar, etc
emulates or quotes Chuck Norris, Clint Eastwood, or John Wayne (although of all of them, John Wayne is the coolest)
Please notice that nice isn't on either list - nice is just that... nice. It shouldn't mean doormat, and it shouldn't exempt common kindness. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 4:36:32 PM |
For me:
He's gotta be tall, athletic, between 25-45 (under 30 if he's mature and over 40 IF he looks younger), have dark hair, preferably long, great arms, a nice smile.
To bad I live in Fort Wayne and you aren't residing there, or at least, on the outskirts of this place. I'm bang-on what you described, UB, and several of the women here seemingly aren't into what I am. With the wild chance I'm ever in Rhode Island, I'll look you up.
Strong grasp of what the Bible actually says.
As an ex-Protestant and skeptic, I seriously wonder what this has to do with being an alpha male, and re-affirms one of my critical pet theories about certain subjects; the label has to do with what the designator wants it to be, for the benefit of the latter. I realize you had more attributes on your list, but I find it rather intriguing---in a Devil's advocate fashion. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:00:04 PM | It's really pretty simple...a man that thinks I'm just the bees knees !
I can do no wrong and believes I make the sun come up ever'day.
That's all. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:05:40 PM | | More or less "amen" to Sunny...I have always said I wanted a man who knew I was less than perfect, but thought I was the best thing that ever happened to him anyway. Oh...and he has to love my kids and vice versa. I dont think I could be with someone longterm who had a strained relationship with my kids. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:39:15 PM | | Ah, angel! How I'd enjoy conversing with you. I put that in because, ( boy do I feel bad for saying this) the typical Christian male of today is a patsy. It's less than rare that I find one who is appealing. The church (in general) is breeding men to be passive. Not attractive. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:45:46 PM | Curious whats a patsy in your words?
What is passive in your words?
And the question raised as well is that for you a alpha signifies those you mentioned ( but, I am sure there are more attributes ). Also that those qualities you think make men less attractive? | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:58:58 PM |
oh, angel! How I'd enjoy conversing with you. I put that in because, ( boy do I feel bad for saying this) the typical Christian male of today is a patsy. It's less than rare that I find one who is appealing. The church (in general) is breeding men to be passive. Not attractive.
That's probably a reason why Christian men are dwindling in numbers in accordance to their perspective churches, and adventitiously contributing to the increase of non-believers such as myself. They are, in some sense, preaching that "male as doormat" is desirable and there are people that eat those sermons up. I would also state they are incorporating certain feminist memes that several feel are not scriptural in ideology. (Not to engage in a thread drift, but that's what some men have told me personally, considering I only go to "holy" places for marriages and funerals). | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:05:45 PM | I think these 2 statements say it
believes I make the sun come up ever'day
have always said I wanted a man who knew I was less than perfect, but thought I was the best thing that ever happened to him anyway. Also a must for me is he has to love the outdoors. I know alot of great great guys that don't. Sigh wish they did.
Bad Qualities
inflated egos
if they are short Little man Syndrome. just can't do it
Rude.
Of course all the common things
Lying ,Stealing, Cheating, deadbeat, controlling,
afraid to get their hands dirty,
this is just a few that is a turn off immediately | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:16:19 PM | Hmm.. this is going to be hard. I prefer these conversations in person. Let me preface everything first by saying I don't want any criticism for my beliefs. I know lots of people choose lots of different paths, the majority of my friends practice far different religions than me. And some practice none. They respect me, and I respect them.
That said, I'm very into the Bible. Studying it, reading it, (trying) to live by it... etc. I really want to only be with a Christian man. The reason is because that is a huge part of a persons life if they are trying to live it. (That can be said for any religion) I'm very tempted by secular men because they seem to have an easier time being confidant, aggressive... so on, all the attributes I'm attracted to. However, they don't hold the same values as I do which means ultimately, they probably won't care for me the way they should.
Christian men try to hold to the Biblical values, but for some reason the church (generic term) doesn't enforce the importance of maintaining masculinity. It's all become very PC. In my church, women hold almost every leadership position. It's like men have abdicated their responsibility as spiritual leaders. ok no crap from the feminists. I understand that women are CAPABLE of leading. I'm a single mother with a career and I'm a student and I'm REALLY opinionated. Trust me, it's hard to be as obstinate as I am and still believe that a woman should submit to her husband. That's why before I choose to submit, I need to know and trust that the man I'm going to entrust my welfare to will come through for me.
I don't know if that clears anything up. Again, just my personal belief.
Now, qualities that make a man less attractive...
-arrogance
-lack of motivation
-disrespect for others
blah blah blah you know. Everything crummy that everyone agrees is undesirable. | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:18:09 PM |
Ah, angel! How I'd enjoy conversing with you. I put that in because, ( boy do I feel bad for saying this) the typical Christian male of today is a patsy. It's less than rare that I find one who is appealing. The church (in general) is breeding men to be passive. Not attractive.
I'm not Christian (nor do I play one on television) but my brother who I adore has recently converted to Catholicism. I've never seen him happier or calmer or more fulfilled.
Having said that, if you'd rather not be Ned Flanders, I'd suggest you look into Wild at Heart: Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul http://tinyurl.com/2rod6e
It's Christianity from the perspective of men who don't want to be 'nice' or 'meek' -the book challenges Christian men to return to authentic masculinity without resorting to a "macho man" mentality.
Again, this in not my faith - but I do find it interesting from the standpoint of letting men be men, and spiritual as well.
/derail | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:31:51 PM | Pondscum I love your name by the way. The only reason I asked those things was that I am a christian man. I have worked as a youth pastor for almost 12 years and it intrigues me when people make certain comments thats all. No I'm not interested in a theological debate I had enough of those in seminary. Helping teens get through life is my biggest concern.  | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:32:38 PM | In the personality/behaviour department:
Sense of humour that meshes with mine.
Sense of ethics that meshes with mine.
Sex drive/preferences that mesh with mine.
In the physical department:
Reasonably fit and active. (That's pretty relative, of course. Basically, at the very least, he can pick me up and lug me around the house now and then, and going for a walk means a couple of hours, not a couple of minutes.) | |
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| Alpha Male!
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:44:58 PM | | i have a low opinion of what is termed alpha male. alpha males are criminals. | |
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What I wonder is why I am single when everybody else has such high standards... You'd think there'd be lots of good picks out of the stuff these girls throw out! 
