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 merkitty
Joined: 9/11/2006
Msg: 1
What does a guy mean by "cuddle"?Page 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
On the profile it asks what your idea of a first date is. I have noticed alot of guys have said they want to sit on the couch and cuddle. Does this mean they want sex on the first date? I think it makes them sound boring and kind of gay. Or they are too cheap to buy a girl dinner, please enlighten me.
 ubkobalt
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 2
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:20:41 PM
Wow. That's interesting.

If guy wants sex - He's a pervert only looking for one thing, he loses.
If guy wants to cuddle - He's boring and gay, he loses.
But, he buys you dinner, without expecting anything in return - How does he win again? And if he wins, does buying her things means she has a price? Cool!
 Devenjohn
Joined: 6/3/2007
Msg: 3
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:22:01 PM
Honestly, I can't imagine cuddling on a first date. Too intimate for me.

But, to answer your question; To me, cuddling is the act of being very near somewhere for an extended period of time. Maybe sitting on a couch with her legs across me getting a foot massage, or leaning heavily into me during a movie. Or, similar things.
 Chaosbeast
Joined: 1/3/2007
Msg: 4
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:23:04 PM
Mmm, could mean several things. They could be unoriginal, they could be writing what they think you (women) want to hear, they could just be inactive (couchpotatoes or shut-ins), or looking for sex. I don't know too many people who would invite a stranger over to their house without screening potential psychos.
 Dale-Allen
Joined: 7/8/2007
Msg: 5
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:30:31 PM
Maybe they some psychological issues of being breast-fed when they were an infant...Or lack of intimacy from their Mother...lol
 jtw1974
Joined: 6/18/2007
Msg: 6
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:32:24 PM
If guy wants sex - He's a pervert only looking for one thing, he loses.

Yup. What's the problem here?


If guy wants to cuddle - He's boring and gay, he loses.

No, it's because he's trying (unsuccessfully) to show that he has a sensitive side OR he's just boring and cheap. Either way, no dude should ever use the word "cuddle" unless they are baby talking within the realtionship. Ick.


But, he buys you dinner, without expecting anything in return - How does he win again?

By not expecting anything in return. Are we going too quick for you here?


And if he wins, does buying her things means she has a price?

Well... you got me there.


Seriously, however, my 2nd point is the closest to reality. It might not even be a boring/cheap/gay thing, but read between the lines. A genuinely nice guy might indeed prefer to... ick... cuddle but can't think of any better way to articulate it than what they have seen thousands of women put in their own profiles. But, on the other hand... yeah. They could be lazy.

However, if this is in relation to a first date... double ick. Clingy and cheap.
 merkitty
Joined: 9/11/2006
Msg: 7
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:45:48 PM
However, if this is in relation to a first date... double ick. Clingy and cheap.

I agree, I think clingy and cheap was my first impression but so many guys say this. It sounds dangerous to get so intimate on a first date, right?
 ubkobalt
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 8
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:45:50 PM
No, it's because he's trying (unsuccessfully) to show that he has a sensitive side OR he's just boring and cheap. Either way, no dude should ever use the word "cuddle" unless they are baby talking within the realtionship. Ick.


Baby talking is indeed gross.

Cuddling however kicks ass. It IS cheap. It's free, and it's fun. I'd be VERY wary of a woman that makes me spend money on her to impress her.
I'll spend on money on her because I feel like it.

Now, on a first date, I can understand not wanting to. And it's perfectly reasonable not wanting to. But it depends what kind we're talking about. And I can definitely see it not exactly being first date material. But I've had plenty of first dates where it did happen.

I'd say away from the "We cuddle NOW!" type though. Or someone who wants to, without letting it happen naturally.
 lakes_man
Joined: 6/3/2006
Msg: 9
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:47:33 PM
Sounds to me to be a little too intimate to be doing on a first date.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 10
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What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:48:48 PM
"It sounds dangerous to get so intimate on a first date, right?" Absolutely!! You should never go to a guy's house on a first date. The ones that have cuddling on their profile........only talked to a few but the few I did went right to talking about sex.

I love to cuddle too, but not on the first date!! UGH.
 merkitty
Joined: 9/11/2006
Msg: 11
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 5:50:19 PM
Thank You! I am not a gold digger, hell I'm happy with a dollar movie and Taco Bell but, to have a stranger on the couch when you first meet is creepy.

I can't believe men can only "spend money" or "cuddle". I mean come on what has dating become? Is chivalry that dead that a man can't spring for a burger anymore?
 ubkobalt
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 12
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:00:48 PM
Is chivalry that dead that a man can't spring for a burger anymore?


Burgertute!

Sure, that sounds great. (But seriously, how many women would laugh with her friends about the cheapass who took you to get fast food?)

Chivilry is dead without the respect and appreciation to keep it alive, not the expectation that it's going to happen. If it's a demand or expectation, you're only going to breed "Come on over to my couch! Heh heh heh." Because there is NO reward for being generous, because you get nothing out of it. Not even a thank you. Or a smile.

Now, say there's a street hobo, and you bought one of them a burger. No thank you. No smile.
Would you feel like giving the next one you run into ANYTHING? Well, dating is a lot like that. There's a lot of rude women that won't appreciate it.
So, it breeds the type where they make their offer, where they get something out of it if someone accepts their offer.

Appreciation is what is offered in return of what you are given. Not what was asked for. If you make demands, and someone gives that because they want something in return, that's "buying" someone.
 jtw1974
Joined: 6/18/2007
Msg: 13
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:05:08 PM

Now, say there's a street hobo, and you bought one of them a burger...

Then that toothless BAST*RD better be putting out!

"That's 100% real beef there, old timer... Now START EARNING IT!!!"
 Dale-Allen
Joined: 7/8/2007
Msg: 14
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:10:59 PM
If I bought the street hobo a burger, we better cuddle afterwards!
 str8ahd
Joined: 5/22/2007
Msg: 15
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:23:07 PM
Oh now you've gone & brought up the c-word. Watch this thread go straight to hell over who pays for what & how women killed "chivalry" ( yes, that c-word) in the '70's by demanding to be treated not only like ladies but like people. SOOOORRRRYYYY!!

I rarely see cuddling in the first date description. If I did, I would pass right by because it's weird & creepy. I would not wonder what it meant. I would assume the guy who wrote it was weird & creepy.

I did date a guy for awhile who though cuddling menat making out like a couple of 15 year olds who had been watching 12 straight hours of porn. Hated that, dumped him & then had to go rent all the movies I missed because of him humping all over me the first time I got them.
 str8ahd
Joined: 5/22/2007
Msg: 16
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:24:08 PM
Crap, double post. Sorry
 Tramp
Joined: 2/8/2007
Msg: 17
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:27:54 PM
We play your game, that's what many women want: cuddle.
To me the cuddling comes way after, it helps go to sleep.
 Peter52356
Joined: 5/3/2007
Msg: 18
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 6:37:37 PM
Erm, I can see it being awkward to "cuddle" on a first date, but what's wrong with a guy who likes to cuddle?

I'm the astronomical sign for Cancer, and we're extremely cuddly people.

Am I supposed to not enjoy cuddling and be gruff and "don't ever touch me" like some guys?

When did cuddling become unacceptable?

I've heard of cuddling parties and things of that nature. (Never attended one, only heard of them.)

Yeah, I'd consider cuddling some random person awkward, or someone you'd just met, but enjoying cuddling with your significant other is one of the rewards of being in a relationship.

Why would I want to deny that joy?

Hate on haters!!

Just kidding.
 scorpio-dude
Joined: 4/3/2007
Msg: 19
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:07:45 PM
Oww... come on! It's a like a gateway-drug.
My money is on the fact that the guys who say this, are hoping that you've enjoyed the evening up until that point. And that you're some-what into them... that his hand can rest somewhere it most likely shouldn't. But you don't say no... that turns to rubbing, groping... serious mad kissing! And before you know it... it's the morning after.


Does this mean they want sex on the first date?

Do women really have to ask this question??????
 musicjunky1967
Joined: 6/3/2007
Msg: 20
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History
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:21:07 PM
If a guy asks you to cuddle, he either watches Oprah too much or has seen too many Lifetime Channel movies. I wouldn't fall for that cuddle line if I were you. That's about the same as when a guy invites you over to watch movies. Yeah.....riiiiiight.

 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 21
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:30:47 PM
hello!!!!
it means they want to have SEX with you, however they know if they write that in their profile -they won't get too many dates.... or will they?
 Peter52356
Joined: 5/3/2007
Msg: 22
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:44:19 PM
Um, when did "cuddling" become sex?

Did I miss the memo?

I must have.

Just because someone enjoys cuddling doesn't mean they want instant sex.

A lot of people will tell you whatever you want to hear, these are known as players.

Just because some people have ruined the meaning of cuddling, doesn't mean that everyone who enjoys cuddling is out for sex.

Stop making generalizations.
 EyeDye
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 23
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:48:29 PM
Wow. That's interesting.

If guy wants sex - He's a pervert only looking for one thing, he loses.
If guy wants to cuddle - He's boring and gay, he loses.
But, he buys you dinner, without expecting anything in return - How does he win again? And if he wins, does buying her things means she has a price? Cool!


Wow, I must be gay then (and boring)! Hell, I didn't even know that!



...jackass
 MermaidMafia
Joined: 5/26/2007
Msg: 24
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History
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 8:22:02 PM

I did date a guy for awhile who though cuddling menat making out like a couple of 15 year olds who had been watching 12 straight hours of porn.

That sounds pretty good to me, and not just because I've been watching porn for 12 hours straight.

Sometimes cuddling and making out is pretty damn nice all on their own, without sex. Not necessarily on a first date though, seems we all agree there.

But c'mon guys, what's not to like about cuddling? You get to press up against something soft and (hopefully) sweet smelling, hands get to wander, legs can entwine, and you don't have to talk to her. Is it the verbiage that's putting you off? What if we called it something manlier like a "cobra hold"?
 splitrock
Joined: 5/16/2007
Msg: 25
What does a guy mean by cuddle?
Posted: 8/13/2007 8:30:27 PM
Cuddle means throw you against the wall and thrust into you like there is no tommorrow. Cuddle is subtle to signal the real intentions.
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