| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 4:36:47 PM | I have been out of the loop for a LONG time. My divorce was 7 years ago, and
I havent had so much as a date, never mind sexual contact since then. I was too
busy raising my son and dealing with other family and career issues.
I have been contemplating dating, which inevtabily will lead to the physical.
Thing is , Im pretty freaked about getting a disease. Theres so much stuff
floating around out there that I wouldnt even think about kissing someone
till I knew they were clean. Does anyone know of a service or lab in southern california where 2 people could go to get a clean bill of health?
And would that be an unreasonable thing to ask someone? | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 4:38:31 PM | Absolutely NOT unreasonable at all!!!
It's your body and you have the right to protect yourself. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 4:42:03 PM | | no its not unreasonable. today ppl r hoppin in the sack with anyone on a first date. if u look at how many ppl r catchin diseases out there....its probley a smart thing to do to get checked...and ur partner checked. if there offended after uve explained ur concerns...than let them be offended and walk. and the above poster is absolutely correct...ur body...ur decision | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 4:52:13 PM | | Chances of contracting anything through kissing are very slim. Once you move onto more "intimate" procedures maybe the more appropiate time to consider getting each other checked out. | |
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GEOSC
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Joined: 7/11/2007
Msg: 5 | |
| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 4:58:35 PM | | But you ladies on here would you feel offended if you were asked to get tested? | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 5:11:51 PM | | If you both are serious about each other, yes..it's okay to ask him. I would not be offended if a guy I was dating asked me to go get tested...nothing to hide...why not!! | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 5:25:41 PM | I'm curious:
1) How many here have actually been asked to be tested?
2) How many have asked a potential partner about their STD status?
3) Are modern-day clinics handing out "STD-FREE" certification cards?
4) In the heat of passion, would lack of testing stop things cold, or would a condom suffice for the moment. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 5:26:57 PM | | Timetravlr- Funny you should say this, because I have told several people I have dated that before we had sex, they and I, would have to get tested. I am a virgin, and I am totally willing to do this! But haven't met a woman that didn't get pissed off at the suggestion yet. If anyone ever expects to have sex with me, they will have to get tested and so will I, simple as that. Stick to your guns! It is not only reasonable, but it is intelligent. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 6:20:23 PM | | Please protect yourself and use condoms. Ask when they were last STD tested, if they are active it should be every 6 months. My friend makes her guys get tested before sex, if they do the relationship moves forward, if not they are history. Good luck. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 6:28:42 PM |
My friend makes her guys get tested before sex, if they do the relationship moves forward, if not they are history.
Does she get laid a lot? My money is on "no".
It is probably not an unreasonable request, but the delivery is going to mean a lot. If it includes any words like "must" or "makes me", I'd rather pass on the sex. That is controlling to try and "make" somebody do something.
How about "What do you say we get blood tests together just to be sure about everything? Neither of us are virgins here and we are both adults. It might be a good idea no matter what just to know and be sure, wouldn't it?"
But no sex before I get tested, particularly when I KNOW the woman would be offended if I demanded the same..... thanks for playing and here are your parting gifts. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 6:56:06 PM | | I dont find it unreasonable at all. Its your health and the other ones health too. We should be aware that there are people out there with'' presents''. Thank you but I dont want something that doesnt come in a box with a bow! | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 7:12:33 PM | | I agree with other posters, it's NOT unreasonable, but only if the person you want tested has been sexually active. To suggest to a virgin or one-person-LTR-and-celibate-since that you are afraid they are diseased is a kick in the ***** and will at the very least delay any more intimacy, but could -- depending on how insulted the other person is -- prevent it altogether. Granted this would prevent an STD from being passed on to you, but it would be a Pyhrric victory. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 7:39:26 PM | | GET TESTED AND IF HE DOESN'T WANT TO DROP HIM AND FIND SOMEONE ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 7:40:53 PM | | I actually am wondering, how far do you need to go with someone to get something? | |
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| testing
Posted: 8/25/2007 8:14:29 PM | 1) Only by one person. Wish more people did!
2) I always do
3) Beats me. I wouldn't be surprised if people faked them
4) So far I've managed to hold back, but it ain't easy
People could've picked up STDs in their one relationship. I know of a few people who did the very first time they had sex, and it's possible for virgins to have them too. Hell back in highschool a galfriend who never even kissed someone got warts
IMO who cares if someone else feels insulted, you gotta watch out for yourself. if you don't, everyone else you care about in the future can get a nice gift from your not caring at that moment | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 8:16:05 PM | Thanks for all the feedback.
If I ever get to that point , I wont feel hesitant asking a woman to get tested.
Actually, its not just STD's. Its also lethal nasties like Hepititis and anitbiotic resistant
TB. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 8:52:34 PM | I have to add something...
So after you ask someone to get tested, they go ahead and get tested.. and it comes back they do have some sort of disease.. What would you do from there? And I would assume you are asking someone who you are now close with and in a relationship so emotions are now involved. I would never just ask random people I am dating casually to get tested...
I personally would not ask someone to get tested for diseases..
If someone asked me to get tested for all these different diseases I would feel a bit weird... LOL. Like STD tests .. ok I have nothing to hide so sure.. But even that is pushing it if they did not trust me when I say I know I dont have anything (I go to the doctor regularly so I am up to date on my health)
but if they were asking me to get tested for all diseases out there, I might think a bit differently of them.. parinoid much? | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 9:20:26 PM | Engage-me wrote "....but only if the person you want tested has been sexually active. To suggest to a virgin or one-person-LTR-and-celibate-since that you are afraid they are diseased is a kick in the *****"
Engage-me- You really want to play Russian Roulette with your health and trust someone if they say "yeah, I am a virgin!" Screw them if they are insulted. It is your health! But hey, if you don't wanna offend anyone...go crazy. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 9:50:38 PM | Its not unreasonable if your willing to get tested as well. Always wear protection! or rather have him wear it.
BUT I'd hate to put this in here, Some things wont show up on tests early enough in catching it. Generally you have to wait three months after the first one to the second one to get a Super clean bill of health AND some things could even slip by those and not show up till Way later in life. Diseases can lay dormant for a long time. Though one test can cover the more common and more likely diseases that one could have. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 10:11:28 PM | | ^^^ Exactly.. I think its for HPV or herpes you have to get retested 6 monthes later after being "exposed" to it.... | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 10:25:38 PM | Most definatly. I have to be on this earth at least for another 9 years and I would like to have a chance to see my grandkids so if I dont see the papers, You dont see the good stuff.   | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/25/2007 10:48:59 PM | Not unreasonable at all. I dated a very nice woman. We were quite open in talking about things. So before we had sex, we agreed, testing for both STD and HIV. And we used protection until all the results came back negative. We went together for 2 years.
I live in Ohio, and the County Health Department maintains a clinic. I'd be surprised if California didn't as well. | |
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| Disease testing before sex?
Posted: 8/26/2007 1:16:36 AM | Absolutely a Current STD Test. I mean I am more than willing to get one, Why shouldn't he. a poster here asked what if it came back positive. Well Damnnn It was nice knowing you but I am not doing the wild thing with them. I don't believe there is anyone that I want to have sex with bad enough to die for.
I also believe in offering my guy something real special for going thru the testing. I also expect something pretty special. | |
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