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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out,      Home login  
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 loverlady01
Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 1
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
This didnt happen to me recently, but it did happen to a friend on this site. She had been lonely a long time and he came to meet her. They then sat up a date for the next weekend, on Saturday night.
Well needless to say, she was looking really wonderful, I, as one of her friends came over and helped her with her hair, and various other minute details. She was so very excited, and dressed to the Tens by the time, we were done with her. (Her other friend and I worked hard to help her out here.)
He never showed up. Now people, would'nt you think someone should call you, email you, and not lead you on, when they are not even going to show up? I think that men and women, should at least tell someone, that you meet, if you are NOT interested. What are we in second grade here? NO adults. Please tell the person you are not interested, if you are't.
We women get our emotions involoved 100% ,we are creatures of habit. We have feelings and dont like them hurt, just like men dont. I know I have been in this same exact position, and have felt the same way. I think that there has been many men also, in this position, but find it hard to voice how they feel about it. Well heres your chance.
Thank you all and have a good one,
LL
 loyal T
Joined: 8/10/2006
Msg: 2
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 1:21:49 PM
I hope that you took that friend out that night when he didn't show up and let her have the chance to show off her very confident and made up self. If not, then you should soon. Show her that she has a lot to offer the one that follows through. His loss then. People on here do it all the time, she can brush it off to not waste her time further or she can ask him what happened then if she wants to try to make any sense of it if he answers her call or email. I would say if he is on the site still he is just browsing likely.Maybe he got cold feet or has fear of committment issues and just couldn't commit to follow up to see how things would turn out. Some people make hasty choices. The best "revenge" is to move on and let them see you found someone better.
 shysparkle
Joined: 11/12/2006
Msg: 3
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 1:29:18 PM
There is no excuse.... it would be adious amigo... would not contact or reply to him again.... pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start again, not all males are a**eholes
 tattzass
Joined: 7/17/2007
Msg: 4
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 1:37:56 PM
Maybe something that was beyond his control came up? I didn't get as far as setting up the date but, I was going to meet a guy off of here and hang out for the day. I started a thread on here called "A series of unfortunate events...", there you can see the unfortunate things that transpired that resulted in me not showing up. I am not making excuses for the guy but, maybe....something happend that he had no control over and felt too bad about standing her up that he never contacted her because he felt she would shut him down????? Just a though.
 trciachippy
Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 5
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 1:55:34 PM
i would say to ur friend that they dnt deserve to be treated that way. she did nothing wrong and please believe that thankfully there arnt that many idiot like that out there.
i havent had that happen but do have experiance of the game somepeople can play.
any men reading this please understand women dnt need flowers, and smooth talk.
please just give us honesty that is all we ask for that is what makes a man worth his weight in gold
i hope ur freind has bounced back and sure she will find someone who deserves her.
 BelleDuJour
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 6
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 2:07:02 PM
I'm so sorry that your friend was hurt in this way, and as previously suggested in another post, I, too, hope that her girlfriends took her out instead.

However, the way I see what she experienced is as this: she is blessed two-fold.

Firstly, she is blessed to learn her "date" is an inconsiderate jackas* at this early point in the courting process. She got to know him a whole lot quicker than she anticipated. She has wasted no more time and energy in empty promises coming from his empty head.

Secondly, she is blessed over and over again with the support and love of yourself and her other female friends.
 loverlady01
Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 7
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 2:48:18 PM
Yes, she had a very good weekend , despite that guy. You see it is us women as friends that help keep each other together. I had went there that day and spent the good part of the whole day helping her, so when it all happened that evening I was unable to be there but had phone contact with her for a couple hours. Then another of our circle of girlfriends, went there that night, tghen I the next morning. I went the next day with her and our other good friend, we got her up and going and feeling good about herself within a matter of a hour or so.
Who better ladies to spend our time with, and share the most of who we are and how we treasure each other as :girlfriends. I know this with my heart and I share alot with my best girlfriends. Men get jealous of that but to BAD! I dont know about anyone else but I know I like having my best friends around when I feel, glad,sad,mad, afraid or anything. I want to thank all of you for helping me to show my friend she is not alone, and all of us understand. I told her its like riding a bike, you have to get back on, hold on and just go, you never forget how!
Thank you all and ladies, GODDESS BLESS you all!
LL
 SunshinenPA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 8
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 3:01:23 PM
It has happened many times to me. Arranged a meeting, and the woman never showed up. So what I do is have an alternate plan. I have a plan already laid out just in case she dosn't show. That way the whole night is not wasted.
 loverlady01
Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 9
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 3:05:57 PM
Thats a wonderful idea from you Sunshine, I am most happy also seeing a man reply to this thread and I know my best friend feels the same way I do. Thank you :}
LL
 Seasonedwoman1
Joined: 5/6/2007
Msg: 10
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 3:13:18 PM
Well I knew at some point I'd come across a subject like this in here.....I'm Sorry for your Friends Pain..... I have never been stood up, but unfortunately have CANCELLED out on someone, via IM. It was not pretty. He deleted me from anything & everything he had me on.....He was PISSED & I think I'm still paying for it, in some way shape or form.

My conscience was killing me, for having cancelled out . I have never ever done that to anyone before. I guess deep inside, I didn't think he was serious in wanting to meet me ( only cause we joked alot ) & so I thought he wouldn't be upset, or maybe even be playin a joke on me..... well I was wrong & I admitted it..... I apologised over & over again....did end up meeting him & now we are friends.....I guess I was luckier than I thought....he's a nice guy & ......it was a lesson well learned.

Believe me...it won't EVER happen again !
 iodine50
Joined: 7/7/2007
Msg: 11
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 4:27:13 PM
I agree loverlady01, that has happened to me and it sucks, a simple phone call, email or like said just say you aren't interested, we are big girls we can take it! I will never sit at home again and wait for someone to show up, did it twice, never 3 times! Honesty guys, just plain honesty that is all we want. It is tough enough being out here fishing for company.

I too spend all afternoon preparing for what I thought was going to be a real exciting date,
what a let down. Block those jerks, that is what I did.

Hang in there girls there are some decent guys out there I just know it, but unfortunately I haven't came across him yet.

Iodine
 BuddhaNature
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 12
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 5:15:26 PM
I missed a hair stylist appointment and I felt so bad I just couldn't bring myself to call him and repair the damage I had done. Can you each think of a time you did something similar?
 Croaker72
Joined: 7/25/2007
Msg: 13
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 5:28:55 PM
Unless he was physically unable to contact the person I would not be saying anything to him. It is obvious he is not interested enough to show common courtesy. It sets a bad president to go back to contacting him. He will do it again.
 dalek1967
Joined: 1/20/2007
Msg: 14
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 5:32:39 PM
Maybe I am to forgiving but I would at least see if the other person had a good reason for not showing up or getting in touch. It could be a illness, accident or something like that. I know if something happened in my family, I may not even think about what time it was much less anything else. I actually had something similar to happen to me once. What happened was her cousin's baby got into some meds and had to be taken to a hospital about 2 hours away. In her rush to leave she left her cell phone and that was where my number was. She could have used her cousins cell but she didn't have the phone number. The kid recovered very well too. Tummy pumped and some meds to counteract the meds he took.

I agree that people should be honest. I have met several people and I was honest about my feelings. If it is not going to work out and two people are not a fit, why lie about it or play someone along like that? It's not fair to either person.

To the OP, tell your friend to hang in there and just keep looking. He's out there.

 doubldeedee
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 15
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 5:39:44 PM
Well this happened to me yesterday. I was to meet up with this guy and he said no matter what I will be there and I was like okay "me too". I am a lady of my word...if I say I'm going to do something....I DO IT...no matter the cause. I went to the place and grant it I had been out the night before drinking and watching the football game with friends....GO TEXANS! thought I'd throw that in there..lol Anyway....I had a little too much to drink and wasn't feeling that great but I got up and got all pretty and got there 10 minutes early because I don't like to be late anywhere. Well I waited for 45 minutes and I was getting furious by the second. We did not exchange phone numbers because I just don't give out my number to anyone....due to bad experiences from this site. Well I finally left...came home and checked my mail and there it was.....his excuse why he couldn't make it....he said he thinks his roommate gave him whooping cough and he wasn't feeling well....didnt want to get me sick!!! Well needless to say I told him exactly how I felt and that although I myself was not feeling well.....I DID SHOW UP.....when you say your going to do something...YOU SHOULD DO IT. He could have had the decency to show up and say "hey I'm not feeling good can we do this another time"? But that is okay....it was his loss!! I went out and bought myself a new laptop so my day would not be ruined...LOL that is my story!
 Alf291
Joined: 4/25/2005
Msg: 16
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 5:58:45 PM
Yup,

If you think you might not be able to make it let the other person know. Give people the same respect that you would expect for yourself.
 grantsean
Joined: 8/12/2007
Msg: 17
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 6:03:37 PM
Only a cowardly loser would do that to you.You are better off finding out now than wasting even another minute with him. I'm sorry that it happened to you though;I'm sure it hurt.
 Crownie317
Joined: 2/23/2006
Msg: 18
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 6:09:37 PM
That's got to suck. Did she ever get an explanation?

I've never been stood up, but I can imagine how much it would hurt to be.
 daisie
Joined: 9/22/2004
Msg: 19
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 6:15:27 PM
I'd say "Well how 'bout that! Now i can join the club of the other 1000s fishies this has happened to and I can start a thread about it too!!"

Speak for yourself about getting all emotional. Uh- um- I dont think Ive ever gotten emotionally involved, certainly not "100%" with some dude i never even met...or only met a couple of times. Hes still a 100% STRANGER at that point and no I dont get all goofy and jump on some emotional roller coaster with a stranger. talk about a bad bet!!!

anyway, people who do this kind of thing are slimey, sleazy, dog puke after the dog eats it and pukes it back up again. however.....they are not new, not a surprise, and the ARE still strangers. save your emotions for a man you actually KNOW!!!

hope this guy gets 4 flat tires tomorrow. do you know where he lives? y ou can go give him 4 flat tires if ya wanna have some fun....
 wizwoman
Joined: 5/28/2007
Msg: 20
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 6:27:30 PM
Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't do what they're supposed to do.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.

BUT.........

> Sisters are there, no matter how much time or how
> many miles are between you.
> A girl friend is never further away than needing
> her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome
> valley by yourself, the women in your life will be
> on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for
> you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf,
> and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.
> Sometimes, they will even break
> the rules and walk beside you...Or come in and
> carry you out.
>
> Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters,
> daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law,
> Mothers, Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins,
> and extended family, all
> bless our life! The world wouldn't be the same
> without women, and neither
> would I. When we began this adventure called
> womanhood, we had no idea of
> the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor
> did we know how much we
> would need each other. Every day, we need each other still.
 Gotmail?
Joined: 7/24/2006
Msg: 21
What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/27/2007 9:20:59 PM
I had it happen and I was mad as a hornet. First off bc the guy really wanted to take me out. I knew him in person, not from online. He actually had the balls to play it off as if he DID not stand me up, as if we had not made concrete plans so he couldn't feel guilty. I was like, oh, so I am a moron, and only imagined we had a date. Later came to find out the guy has more issues than Sport Illustrated, so all in all I was probably spared a headache. It did SUCK though, to get ready, wait and have him not show up.

Losers, they are losers if they do this and you are better off without losers, ya think?
 loverlady01
Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 22
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/28/2007 1:40:55 PM
Wizwoman,
I love that poem. I had that in mind also, but could not remember how it went:} Thank you all for such wonderful advice to my best friend. She will be replying to this after Thursday. She had to redo her account due to technical difficulties on her pc. So she cant post for 3 days. I know she has told me, that this is helping her out alot.
I, also, want to thank the men also for your feed back here. I know for myself, not everyone treats others in the manner, that this thread is directed. I try to treat others the same way I would like people to treat me.
And I do realize that life sometimes gets in the way and there may be situations that happen, where one couldnt call. But, you see, this is the second time with two differant men, that this same thing, has happened to my friend here. We wanted to addrress this issue so we could help others that may be possibly going through the same saituation, but maybe, afraid to speak up, and or suffer in silence. Not everyone knows or can handle a situation the same. We are all individuals. We are, who we are.
I know for myself, If I feel like anything is wrong, or any red flags are raised in my mind, when 1st talking someone, I wouldnt be interested at all. I have had this happen a couple years ago. I dont play with my own feelings or anyone elses.
I find some adults shouldnt play where the big dogs play if they cant play nice. I take my ball at that point & go HOME and dont come back, so to speak, lol. So I try to remember to go with my gut. I like the way Dr. Phil phrases it,"If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, It's a duck!" And I will leave my entry at that.
Well Tc ya'll and by all means Happy Fishing to you all!!!!!!!!!
LL
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 23
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/28/2007 1:45:47 PM
It happens. I learned a long time ago that many people play games, and the art of life is to understand who will be responsible and who will not.

Have a good one.
 loverlady01
Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 24
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/28/2007 1:51:05 PM
Good one Gotmail,lol. I like that sport illustrated comment! You are right on the money gf!!:} I dont blame you for being mad either, I would have also, and maybe then some,lol. But, do hope you are ok and wish you the best sista, you dont desrve being treated like that hun, your better than that! Keep your head up and walk forward. Lifes to short to be waiting for someone like that.
LL
LL
 goodsenseofhumor
Joined: 2/8/2007
Msg: 25
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What would you say, if someone said they were coming to take you out, but didnt show up?
Posted: 8/28/2007 1:53:47 PM
In my books...there is no excuse for such disrespect to a woman or a man.....treat people the same way you would want to be treated.....I really feel bad for her.......dont understand how someone could do that...that had to of been the worst feeling..........good luck to your friend
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